Celestia, fed up with Blueblood's behavior, cast a spell on her nephew to teach him a lesson, making him treated like he has treated everypony else. The only pony to show him any kindness is one pony he has mistreated: Rarity.
Chapters (5)
- Member Since 13th Oct, 2013
- offline last seen 1 hour ago
JusSonic
Hey folks. JusSonic here, finally sending fics here. While I was worried about coming here for some time now, I decided to give this place a shot...as long as you be fair, 'kay?
JusSonic
Joined 13th Oct, 2013 ·
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whatever he likes it or no?
I should punch that mule to let him know to never insult Ponyville.
4147183 You and me both.
Phobos? Nyx? If this is some sort of crossover, you should consider marking it as such. As it is, it's terribly confusing.
Plus, didn't Blueblood and Rarity make up?
i.imgur.com/sRhBq.png
I'll withhold any further judgement for now.
4147839
To be honest, it was a non-talking cameo so it doesn't count.
4147839 my theory is that's since he's the only member of the Royal Family who wasn't busy, the two were forced to christen the yacht, even if they didn't like eachother
4147839 Nyx is from Past Sins, no idea bout Phobos
4152706 Phobos is an OC pet Moon Dragon for Nyx. Haven't you seen his debut in "Happy Birthday, Nyx"?
4152970 I know who Phobos is, I've read much of his work on deviantart, it's been awhile since I read that
4152706
4152970
I do know who Nyx is; Phobos, I never even heard of. That's why I suggest an additional tag, or at least a warning. Not every reader can be expected to know OCs, after all.
Nice chapter. Though I wonder, what is everyone going to think, when they realize they have been acting like blueblood. That would be funny to read when the guards realize that they talked, or the ponies of ponyville realized instead of helping somepony, like they should, they laughed, like blueblood.
That's karma for Blueblood.
He has a lot to learn in order for the spell to be broken.
I felt so bad for Blueblood in this chapter. I hope both Rainbow Dash and Spike both have to eat bad apples for at least one day. BTW. who's 'hugh'?
Nice chapter. I can't wait for the next one. Best of luck.
I just read the parts dealing with Blueblood and skipped everything else. I really wish you would list in your descriptions the story, or stories, that need to be read in order to be able to follow the story.
Okay, after having read everything, I have to say:
Dude, you need to cut down on the references/crossovers/OCs. Some of them were completely superfluous to begin with. Either stick to the relatively simple tale of Blueblood learning humility, or do grand worldbuilding with the legion of OCs—and then take the time to establish your setting properly. As it is, the reader is swamped with characters they likely don't know and therefore don't really care about.
It's like 4168178 said, most readers will probably decide to skip those parts because they are just too damn confusing.
I'm sorry if this sounds like an attack; it's not supposed to be one.
4169363 this, though I was more crass about it, was what I meant with my own comment.
4169363
No offense, but that's what sub-plots are for.
4169545 no offense, but don't thumbs-down or delete a comment just because it's honest criticism you don't like.
Listen, we read this story for Blueblood's growth as a character, not for a collection of OCs or as a set up for another story.
4168178
Tell you what: I will make a blog that shows the timeline of my (as well as my pals') series of fics. How does that sound?
4169693 Sound fair. Just know that 1. I don't follow you so I won't know when the blog is up, and 2. Just because I see the timeline doesn't mean that the other stories will interest me.
4169545
Thing is, there's next to no establishing any background. That creates problems.
For instance: enter Phobos. Who's Phobos? Why should I care about him? Or Tao? Who's Ben? Golden Heart? Boris? Who are any of these people, and why should I care what they think? I don't even know what most of them look like!
Were all these characters actually necessary to include? That's the question I'm raising. If you feel they were all important enough to have their own space in the story, good! But please, give us an opportunity to learn why, then! Make us care about them! You could've cut Phobos completely, for instance, and the story wouldn't have suffered at all.
4169784
I just put up the blog that shows the timeline. Just read my previous stories as well as my pal Shadow Master's for more info.
4169833
That's certainly an option!
I've one more suggestion, then I'm out of your hair, I promise: If this is part of a particular universe of your creation (Lunaverse is an example, or Fallout:Equestria, or many more), you should consider marking it as such in the description. You'll get a whole lot less bumbling, confused folks like me!
4169869
Fine. Very well, I will discuss it with some of my pals and we will see what we can come up with.
As much as I dislike Blueblood, I hope Rarity and the rest brings him back.
4158342 You said it!
Okay. So this would be a good story, except for the sheer amount of OCs and backstory that never get explained. It makes what would be a fairly enjoyable story complicated and confusing. That said, try linking the other stories that tie in or leaving a warning in the description.
7397444
Agreed. That's how he does it sadly