Who's up for Sombra Shipping?
Human in Equestria16,966 stories ·16,805 members
The Writers' Group56,344 stories ·9,285 members
Looking for Editors3,384 stories ·5,413 members
Followers of Discord 2,748 stories ·3,184 members
The OC Fanfiction Library1,803 stories ·1,404 members
Wisdom was a normal girl. When she's pulled into Equestria by an Overcharged spell, she Reacts the same way anyone would, she panics. When she starts to remember things from before, she seeks the help of a Mysterious Gryphon mage. During the journey she discovers a little about herself and her past.
Page generated in 0.123 seconds
Total duration
865 users online
515,291 hits today, 2,314,256 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
If you dislike my story can you atleast tell me why? I'd like to fix whatever it is.
Well, you need to fix a little bit of errors here and there, but, okay.
4317986 thank you! I'll go through and fix them once I get the time.
I'm sorry, but another error to fix. In the beginning of your story, you always start sentences with the word I. Also, the story is hard to understand with 7 chapters. Keep up the good stories!
4327935 Thank you for pointing that out. I didn't notice. The story's not over yet. Three or four more chapters.
I can't wait to see them. I love to read awesome stories like these.
I gueeess I'll spend some of my valuable time to read this small little fanfic to see how it is.
This is really not needed. I'd suggest to go ahead and name him in the story or just continue as you are calling him.
Haha, the reaction she had when she saw Fluttershy, Twilight and Discord is funny.
Translation: Oh shit.
Also, not to nitpick or anything but you have a few grammatical errors here and there. Those grammar nazis love to pick on people for that.
Edit:
How does she know what world she came from when she got there as a griffin?
Also, how does she know what she was a human when she got there as a griffin?
WARNING: SPOILERS IN THIS COMMENT!
Well, I was about to call it quits, but when I came to that last part.. that's an interesting development. Griffins that can use magic...
You know.. Since I read Griffin the Griffin (you should totally read that if you haven't yet, it's AWESOOME!~
) I've wanted to be a griffin instead of a pony.
Aand now that I think about it, that's pretty OP. That griffins can use magic here, I mean. Because they can fly, along with flying, they have a huge wingspan and are more built for flying than ponies, so in turn are a lot more agile, they have hand-like super sharp talons, natural predator and all that. And now add magic in the mix? Yeahhh.
Oh and this story is pretty rushed.
This part confuses me.
Onto the next chapteh!
Well, I'll go ahead and give you a thumb up. This is a great idea but this story could use a lot of improvement so far.
4355539 the freak out over having a new body.
4355776 thanks! Everyone one this site is so nice! ...... Most of the the time.
I
writing Pinkie too! Most of my stories are about her. Until I decided I needed to write other characters as well.
Missing a comma and a period.
4371903 PINKIE IS BEST PONY.
My favorites are 1:Pinkie
2: Fluttershy
3: Twilight
*Cough* so... um.. yeah.
4353304>>4355776 Squee! People like it!
I like the theory that Pegasi can channel magic through their wings.
4374144 Actually it was a reference to Foal of the Forest. If you haven't read it yet you should, it was awesome. it distracted me from working on this for the longest time.
4374211 Alright
Nice.
Awesome! More chapters! I can't wait to read! I am using too many exclamation marks! Oh, well!
Will there be anymore chapters? Totally hanging here, but I'll live.
4461300 sorry. But the next few chapters might take a while, I been hit with massive writers block.
That's Ok, you've done a great job at writing and I love the story so far. I don't care if I have to wait for a book if it is worth the wait! Thanks for the awesome story! You are so awesome at writing stories compared to me so don't get discouraged!
Interesting.
4315741
One of the most crucial things any work of literature needs to even be considered readable, is correct grammar. This is something you seem to fail at, and should really get around to understanding if you truly wish to improve your writing skills.
This is what I'm talking about. Why is 'O' in overcharged and 'R' in reacts capitalized? They aren't the beginning of a sentence, nor are they proper nouns. You do this often, and it needs to be corrected.
Also, your eighth chapter is titled Pinkie parties, when the 'P' in parties should also be capitalized. And I noticed your ninth chapter is titled Princess of Freindship. You misspelled the word friendship.
Why on Knighty's poorly coded site would you add parenthesized commentary inside your own story? Not to mention it's just lazy writing. It'd take you, like, what, ten seconds to Google up some male names? I'd highly recommend not doing this in the future. It discourages the reader from finishing the whole story, let alone the first chapter.
Again, you need to understand proper grammar. The sentence looks disorganized and childish. This is what the sentence should look like:
These are just a few corrections out of the many that still need to be. I'd highly recommend getting an editor-or-two to go over your work and fix your mistakes. That, and I'd also recommend learning and understanding the proper use of grammar, which you can learn more about for free here.
1# aww
2# lol
3# oooo
4# aww
5# humm
6# ooooo
7# hummmm
8# humm
9# humm and lol
10# ooooo
11# oooo
12# lol
4505337 Thanks! ... I think.
13# aww
4499271 Thanks for the Tips, I'll be sure to check those out soon.
14# hummmm
15# aww and hummm
Just saying. Quick Claw is an item in Pokemon.
5202171 really? I don't play Pokemon.
Aweee keep it up
should include random tag.