Rainbow Dash stood frozen at Applejack's door, her hoof only inches away from its wood. She was not sure if this was a good idea. Would Applejack even understand? Rainbow had reviewed the book as much as she could, hoping it would help her with her confession. She still had doubts though.
"Come on, Rainbow," she muttered to herself. "Applejack's one of your closest pals. Of course, she'll understand."
She prepared to knock again, but hesitated. After another long pause, she turned around.
"Maybe I should just forget the whole thing."
But as she started to walk away, the door opened.
"You sure you don't want me to help with anything else?" Spike asked as he backed out of the house.
"It's fine, Sugar," Applejack said with a chuckle. "I can take it from here."
"You really sure? I can organize your sock drawer!"
The cowgirl sighed. "Spike, I don't wear any socks."
The dragon blushed. "Right. Your underwear drawer then?"
"Get out. Now."
"Don't wear that either, huh?"
"Spike..."
"Okay, okay!"
As he held up his claws and backed away, he bumped into Rainbow Dash. When she turned to face him, he was blushing.
"Whoops!" he laughed nervously. "Sorry, Dash!"
Applejack rolled her eyes as she gently pushed him away from them both. "Get out of here, ya rascal."
"Right. Sorry, again!"
As they watched the little dragon disappear over the hills, Applejack could not help but chuckle.
"What was that all about?" Rainbow asked.
"Aw, nothin'," the cowgirl said with a shrug. "Spike was just bein' Spike. So how ya doin' today? Did Twilight help ya with yerr dilemna?"
Rainbow glanced around. "Not here, okay?"
Applejack shrugged again. "No problem. Come inside. Spike and I baked some fritters this mornin'."
"Hold on. You actually let Spike into your kitchen? After what happened last time?"
"Oh, he's less trouble now. Especially when all I ask him to do is hand me the apples."
"And he didn't make a mess?"
Her question was answered when they entered the kitchen. There was a glob of squished apples over by the stove.
"Eh," Applejack said with a shrug. "He's gettin' better. Help yerrself to a fritter while I get the mop."
"Yeah, sure," Rainbow said, looking at her wearily as she grabbed a plate from the cupboard.
The thoughts swimming in her head were eager to escape through her mouth. What should she say? Should she get straight to the point?
She figured she should just start with casual conversation and work her way up.
"So, um," Rainbow uttered as she put a fritter on her plate. "Why did you let Spike ruin your kitchen again?"
Applejack rolled her eyes as she mopped the floor. "He didn't ruin it. He just wanted to help."
"Why? Isn't he supposed to do that with Twilight?"
"He said he was ahead of schedule, so he came over here."
"Huh. I would've thought he'd gone to Rarity's."
"That's what I thought, but apparently Rarity had company."
Rainbow blinked. "A guy?"
"No, a client. Spike didn't say what gender though."
The pegasus smirked at the cowgirl's little joke. This eased the tension a little, but she still felt queasy in the stomach. She was both hungry and nauseated. The fritter was in her hoof, neither moving towards her mouth nor the plate. Applejack glanced at the pegasus over her shoulder. She knew from experience that when a pony lacks appetite, something is on their mind.
"You okay?"
"Huh?" Rainbow uttered, snapping out of her daze. "Oh, uh, yeah."
Applejack raised her eyebrow, not believing her.
"Is this about the whole gay thing from yesterday?"
Rainbow said nothing. Applejack let the mop drop to the floor as she moved to sit with her friend at the table.
"Come on, RD," she said, putting her hoof on hers. "You can tell me anythin'. I won't judge."
Rainbow lifted her eyes to meet hers. She did not know why it was so hard to talk to her now. When they were talking about her possible lesbianism, everything was easy. Her nightmare came to mind, and she remembered that Applejack had been one of her persecutors. Now, Rainbow was no dream interpreter, but she figured Applejack, Fluttershy and Rarity had been the judges because they were all straight, at least as far as she knew. She realized it had not been the real Applejack. No, the real Applejack was not condescending.
Then why was she so afraid to tell the truth? This was the Element of Honesty, for crying out loud! She was also the most level-headed pony she knew. Rainbow had never had trouble being open with Applejack (save the egghead incident). Why was she having trouble now?
"Dash?"
The pegasus took a deep breath. "Applejack, have you ever been in love?"
The cowgirl looked away for a moment as her cheeks turned pink. "Once."
"Well, when you were in love, did you ever think of...sex?"
Applejack's green eyes widened. "Gland sakes, Rainbow! We weren't that close!"
Rainbow grinned a bit. "So you're demi?"
The cowgirl blinked. "I'm what now?"
"Demi. You know, like Twilight?"
Applejack scratched her head. "Huh?"
Rainbow's grin vanished. "She didn't tell you?"
"Didn't tell me what?"
The pegasus was silent for a long while. Then she zipped out of the house, knocking over Applejack's kitchen table in the process. Her confession would have to wait. Right now, she needed a talk with a certain alicorn.
She did not bother using the door. Instead, she burst open the shutters of the library window, surprising Twilight and Spike, who had apparently just returned.
"Rainbow?" Twilight said. "What's going...?"
"You didn't tell Applejack you were demi?!" Rainbow demanded, flying in the alicorn's face.
"Demi?" Spike said, scratching his head. "Demi what?"
Twilight's face grew pale. "Spike, I believe the room upstairs needs dusting."
"But I just dusted this morning..."
"Now!"
The dragon was taken aback by the alicorn's tone, but grabbed his feather duster and rushed upstairs. Rainbow glanced between Twilight and where Spike had gone.
"You haven't even told Spike?!" she asked accusingly.
"I haven't even told him about heterosexuality!" Twilight exclaimed. "You can't just barge in here shouting stuff like that, especially around a baby dragon!"
"You still haven't answered my question! Why does Applejack not know you're demi?"
"I...I..."
Rainbow sighed and sank to the floor. "You're afraid of coming out too, aren't you?"
Twilight looked away and nodded.
"But...you told me yesterday."
"Because I figured if I gave you the book, you would find out anyway. And I thought you'd understand, since you're ace."
Rainbow gasped. "How did you know?"
"Don't get me wrong. I wasn't judging, but from how you were describing your non-sexual attractions to Soarin, it seemed the most plausible."
"If you thought I was ace, why didn't you tell me?"
"I thought it best that you figure it out for yourself."
The pegasus took a few steps towards her. "How many ponies have you told? About you, I mean."
Twilight looked her in the eyes. "Just you and Pinkie. After reading the book, she asked me."
"Yeah," Rainbow grunted as she sat down. "That book."
There was a long pause.
"It scared me," Rainbow admitted. "I mean...it was a relief at first, the idea that I actually belonged to a group. The others never really did it for me, and knowing there was another one that fit me perfectly made me feel like a weight was lifted or something. Then..."
"You read the part about corrective rape," Twilight finished with a nod. "Yep. It's disgusting, it's wrong, but it happens."
The pegasus hung her head. "I'm scared."
Twilight nodded again. "So am I. I feel like I shouldn't be. I'm not ashamed of what I am, but others..."
"Might be. Yeah. I know. Heck, it took me a while to accept that lesbianism was a thing."
"Only because you didn't understand it, I gather."
"Yeah. It's even a little hard to wrap the whole ace thing around my head."
"It's difficult, I know. Most of us grow up thinking there's only one form of love, between a mare and a stallion, because that is what pony society teaches us. It also teaches us that...sex is a part of life and that feeling the need for it is natural."
She paused as tears formed in her eyes. "You know...I didn't get all these ideas from the book. As I was growing up, I did not find myself all that interested in colts. I had a few crushes, but they were never intense. I told my parents that there was something wrong with me. They said that I...that I hadn't fully blossomed yet." She sniffed. "That I would grow out of it. Then..."
She trailed off for a moment. "I met this one colt. It was like love at first sight. And as I got to know him better, I had...thoughts. Thoughts I had never experienced before."
"Did you," Rainbow gulped, "do it?"
Twilight turned away. "It doesn't matter what happened in that relationship, just that it ended. But after him, I...I couldn't feel anything else towards other colts. I didn't even have another crush for a while, but it wasn't as strong."
She sniffed again. "I found the book, read it, took the quiz. It explained everything. But...I couldn't tell any pony. I...I was afraid they wouldn't accept me. I couldn't even tell my parents, or Shining Armor! I couldn't even talk about it with the girls! And Spike, he's too young to even know about these things! I...I..."
She buried her face in her hooves as she released all her tears. Rainbow put her hooves around her and rocked her gently.
"It's okay," she whispered soothingly. "I know how you feel. I'm too scared to even talk about it with Soarin."
Twilight raised her tear-stained face. "You're worried he'll try to..."fix" you?"
Rainbow glanced down at the floor. "I'm worried he'll dump me."
The alicorn nodded in understanding. "For what it's worth though, I don't think Soarin's that kind of guy. I mean...don't you always describe your dates as casual and non-lovey-dovey?"
"That doesn't mean we don't have a physical relationship. We've made out a couple of times and I sort of enjoy it. But...when he ran his hoof up my..."
She could not continue.
"You should tell him," Twilight concluded. "If he can't accept your preferences, maybe he's not the one for you."
"He's the one," Rainbow insisted. "I'm sure he is."
"Then he'll accept you for you."
"And what about you? Won't the others be just as accepting?"
She looked her pegasus friend in the eye and they came to the same conclusion.
"We should tell them," they both said.
"But I'm still scared," Twilight admitted.
"I am too, but we can't hide ourselves forever. I mean I had planned that, but now that I think about it, it's stupid. I mean they're our friends, right? And if they don't approve, then they're lousy friends."
"But how are we going to break it to them?"
Rainbow locked her foreleg in hers. "We'll tell them together."
Suddenly, something pink popped out of the shelves. The two of them yelped and then calmed down once they realized it was Pinkie Pie. She hopped between them.
"Ooh!" she piped. "Sounds like fun! We can have a Coming Out Party! We'll invite our friends for games and cake (which I know you love, Dashie), and then we'll all come out of the closet! Well, I wouldn't say my metaphorical hiding space is a closet, more like a bathroom..."
"Pinkie," Twilight interrupted. "That's not what a Coming Out Party..."
"It's a party, isn't it?"
"Yes..."
"And the three of us are coming out, right?"
"Right, but..."
"Then what else are we supposed to call it?"
Twilight opened her mouth, but found she could not argue with Pinkie's logic.
"So..." Rainbow uttered. "You haven't told any pony other than us that you're pan?"
"Panny," Twilight whispered.
"Right."
Pinkie shrugged. "It never came up in conversation. But the whole world might as well know! I'm panny and I'm proud!"
"Now, now, Pinkie," Twilight said. "Let's start small and just invite our friends, okay?"
Pinkie grinned. "Okay, Twi! So when should we do it? This afternoon?"
"Please, no," Rainbow insisted. "I need a little time."
"Oh. Tomorrow, then?"
The pegasus thought for a moment and then nodded.
"Sounds good to me," Twilight agreed.
"Perfect!" Pinkie squealed.
Rainbow was confused to see Pinkie so happy. Then again, she was always happy, but after yesterday, she had expected otherwise.
"Uh, Pinkie?" Rainbow asked.
"Yeah, Dashie?" Pinkie replied, ceasing her bouncing.
"Can I talk to you?" The pegasus glanced at Twilight. "Alone?"
The alicorn got the message and silently trudged upstairs. Rainbow Dash gulped as she turned to face the pink pony.
"Pinkie," she said, rubbing the back of her neck. "About what happened yesterday..."
"Don't worry about it," Pinkie said with a sympathetic smile.
"No, I really need to get this off my chest." Rainbow sighed. "I'm sorry I reacted the way I did. You just caught me by surprise and... Still, I should've been more sensitive about your feelings. You're a cool pony and all, Pinkie, but...I'm just not interested in you in that way. Anyway, thanks to you, now I know for sure I'm not interested in girls."
She paused. "But for what it's worth, the kiss wasn't all that bad. And...if I did like girls...I think I would like you."
Pinkie's eyes were flowing tears of joy. "Aw, Dashie..."
The two met in a gentle embrace. It felt good to be hugged by Pinkie. Not because she was attracted to her, but because she was her friend.
"But," Pinkie said as she pulled away, "I've moved on."
Rainbow blinked in surprise. "Already?"
"Since you started dating Soarin, I've been keeping my options open, and now that I know for certain you can never be attracted to me, I can fully move on. Also, you really need to work on your kissing."
"But...who?"
Pinkie then pulled a piece of paper out of her mane, stared at it and sighed dreamily.
"I have a new love now," she declared.
Rainbow Dash peered over her shoulder to see a picture of that traveling party pony, Cheese Sandwich. The pegasus shook her head with a smirk.
"You two would be perfect together."
"You think so?" Pinkie asked.
"Come on. How often are you gonna find some pony as random as you?"
The party pony snorted. "Yeah, you may be right."
"So...no hard feelings about...?"
"No hard feelings!"
And so their continuing friendship was sealed with a shake of the hooves.
A little rough on the chapter, and in the centre, I got a little disoriented with who was talking between Twilight and Dash. Might want to add one or more tags there to help.
This story feels an awful lot like an abserdity (it's a form of drama, I'm not trying to fire shots) in which it seems to make fun (not this story) or over act (this story) human nature.
This whole acesexual thing is new to me and I thank you for bring it to my attention, however, after some light research (key word) it seemed that generally speaking that the worst ace's got was the cold shoulder from society, and all these ‘corrective rapes' were conducted by people who were literally not right in the head and when it was ‘common practice' it was usually in the ‘old days' or 3rd world countries. I have a sneaky suspicion that Equestrai isn't ether (Also, homosexuals were killed in broad day light in those countries, not just raped).
I also get the feeling you already know all this but I wanted to get this off my chest and ask you this.
I am I missing something?
I mean, I would love to hear your side of the argument but I feel that I'm missing an aspect to this opinion.
Anyway, this story is entertaining and I want to keep reading to see what else I can learn/research.
From an unknown friend who has no idea what he actually is, keep up the writing, because it's mighty thought provoking!
*claps* Wonderful story so far, my dear. I look forward to more.
Ok, granted, I'm not exactly known for being a typical person (actually, I'm a local celebrity where I'm from due to eccentricity alone), but I never had any of these problems/dramas when I identified as Asexual or Pansexual or whatever, or even now when I'm just like "I dunno, I bone who I bone and I don't really think about it", it's pretty much been "yeah, that sounds like you..."
Once again though, I'm KNOWN for being different, and I've never had ALOT of the Drama that most people do....
YES! CHEESE PIE 4EVER!
Yay, she talked to Twilight. Poor Twilight though, it sounds like that relationship she mentioned ended badly. I hope that colt didn't hurt her.
4142149 PinksXWierd Al Pony....All of my yes.
Is kinda odd Rainbow would just assume Twilight was open about it. Then again someone has outed me assuming I was open with it and I just assumed it was obvious that you don't go around telling people that stuff. So it's not all that unrealistic. I don't understand how that can happen. But it happened.
I'd guess Rainbow Dash is largely just being paranoid, that Soarin and her friends are all right with it. But there is the dark tag looming over things and nothing really dark has happened yet. That is rather ominous.
Rainbow, you need to give AJ some answers now.
4142379 Now that's just mean, especially because I understand the nickname
My attention continues to be held, despite the robotic narrative. I don't mind that too much, since I just put the words together in my head, but it's bled into Twilight's dialogue, and I don't think she'd speak with a lot of separated words (Would not, could not, should not, will not, what is, do not, etc.).
Still, this story's got me interested. Carry on.
I always thought Dash was just Griffinsexual.
With maybe a touch of Breeziesexual in there too.
Folks, I don't think the writer's ever claimed to be a career author, or even all too interested in being a consistent figure in the writing community. She's just someone who's trying to get out her thoughts and a bit of awareness, using the trials and tribulations of the subject as a vehicle. She's not Pen Stroke or AestheticB, we don't need to continually criticize each chapter like we're expecting it to be technically perfect. It's not -just- a story, and it wasn't written to BE perfect. Just relax and read, folks.
(Edited for gender clarification.)
There's one thing I don't understand: Spike is clearly supposed to be a little kid In this story, Twilight says she hasn't "told him about heterosexuality yet" and that he's "too young to know about this". So if Spike's role in this story is that of a little kid, who is AJ in love with?
4142440
From what I understand, the joke is that real amoebas procreate asexually, in the scientific sense of the term.
They're basically calling the person a selfsexual... or a narcissist.
4142567 She's a girl, though...
Is there a term for being somewhere between Asexual, and just not giving a fuck?
4142546 I thought she was rainbowsexual.
A very serious chapter, it could have used some lightheartedness, or some comedy to keep things from feeling so down.
Like using Demi as a person rather than a term
*discord busts in through the door and looks around*
D: I was told Demi Lavato was here... it appears I was lied to... AJ will not escape my retribution...
That has to be the single best Fanfiction-Pinkie Pie quote ever.
4142546 pffffff as if!
4143145 That would be interesting to know
4143029
Thank you for clarification.
4142581
I felt it was more Twilight just being mother hennish. Personally I don't even like Spike, but most stories involving him in any form of shipping have him as basically only a baby in dragon terms, considering their life spans. If we assume AJ and Rarity are the oldest in the group, and put them at about mid-20s, Spike's probably the equivalent of a 16 year old pony.
All three chapters read in one sitting. Don't always do that... 'less I'm sucked in
Even though it's got a fairly heavy subject matter which is interesting to some, independent of that it would be a good story. The writing, for the most part, is solid; the humor made me laugh more than once, and the fears Dash feels are quite real (though hopefully not realistic).
The opening of the first chapter was a tad awkward, but the writing's gotten a lot better as the story's progressing. While some have talked about this chapter dragging a bit, I personally don't see it. A few have also mentioned getting lost in conversation, which can happen if the names of the characters aren't mentioned after a good amount of back-and-forths, and I can see the potential for it, but I didn't have a problem.
I always thought the abbreviated term for pansexual was "pan". Interesting... I'd hate for pan to be an epithet Also, I had no idea about corrective rape. The concept is beyond deplorable
Anywho, good job. Twilight's whole confession nearly made the liquid pride from mien eyes
Looking forward to more, when you get around to it
4143145
I demand that be listed as an official sexuality immediately.
4146696 I was talking about the discrimination, not the rape. Also, if we're gonna run some statistics, our hate crime rates are down cirqa 2010. The point of my post was that I have never, ever been discriminated against for my (lack of) sexuality in this country, and I am grateful I live in a country that allows gay marriage at the federal level and is in discussions about transvestite rights right now, instead of one where there are popular parties using bigotry towards homosexuality as political platforms. I could have said "I'm glad I don't live in Iran", but I doubt the author is from Iran.
Oh, and while we're posting stats, I will just leave this here. As it turns out, the States has almost three times the rape rate of Canada, even with its larger population. I'm all for dealing with rape in Canada, but I am allowed to be grateful I live here, too.
4141915 this is also the first time i heard anybody(or anybook in this case) mention "corrective rape" and i live in england which is rather similar to america without all the blatent patriotism and religious nut-jobs saying that homosexuality is a sin.
4146908 Yeah, homophobia doesn't exist in England...
4147130 well it does exist, there is just less of it.
4147517 sure there is. I mean, the USA once had a national hero neutered because he was gay, even though he pretty much won WWII for them.
Oh wait! That was Britan!
4147706 I see how shipping the girls with each other would be distracting from the theme of friendship, but how is it distracting if Fluttershy starts dating Discord? Or Big Mac? Or Trixie? Just because the show is about friendship, doesn't mean there can't be any romance in it.
Personally, even though I'd love them make Flutters gay, If she fell in love with Discord that would be one if the best things ever.
And it could also make for a good moral about friendship. The rest of the Mane 6 have to learn to accept the fact she's dating someone they don't really like. There, not so distracting after all...
4147560 who was he? i do not research history enough to know:
also that was half a centuary ago, i am talking about how people treat homosexuality today.
4147801 big mac is dating cheerilee
4146908 The man your, erm, passionate friend is refering to is Alan Turing, inventor of the Turing Test and code breaker for the infamous Enigma Code. He was arrested and sentenced to a prison term for homosexuality (which was still considered a mental illness/crime in those days in all Western countries), but chose to opt for chemical castration instead. He later died of chemical poisoning, and there is a good deal of controversy over whether or not he committed suicide over his treatment as a homosexual.
None of which has anything to do with the sexual discrimination that runs rampant in the modern United States, of course, but is a very interesting historical anecdote nonetheless.
4142003 Yeah, I am utterly confused by the whole "corrective rape" bit. In fact, I have never faced discrimination for asexuality. I mean, yes, people have made jokes about it, but mostly they find it an entertaining novelty to make light of, like my inability to smell or my obsession with birds. I've never heard anything about asexual discrimination before.
Where is this coming from, OP?
Having said that, Equestria does have a problem with bigotry if Zecora and the buffalo are any indication, so it isn't too shocking that it would be a thing there, too. But corrective rape? You don't think that's going a bit too far?
I HATE Soarin'-Dash, yet for some odd reason I found myself enjoying this fic. Not sure why, probably because of the message. Oh well, who cares. This was a REALLY good fan fic, and I'm glad I read it.
4149465 it is still anecdotal evidence, out of date anecdotal evidence so it doesn't really count as an arguement for england being homophobic. *sigh* no matter where I go on the internet at least one person is resorting to logical fallacies.
4151420 Resorting to pointing them out, you mean? I'm confused. Was I making one?
4151423 the other guy was
4151501 Oh. True.
4151420 I wasn't trying to say England is homophobic. Just pointing out that homophobia exists everywhere, not just the USA. I'm afraid that you didn't understand what I was saying... I tend to sound more enthusiastic than I am in Internet conversations, I wasn't trying to start a fight or anything...
4151586 well as long as you don't act like that in philosophy forums i don't see the problem, though your example(as it is historical) cannot be applied to today(if treated as an arguement), homophobia does exist in most if not all societies.
To be honest, I realize this story is trying to deal with a rather serious issue, yet in a lot of ways it comes off almost like a comedy. Everything is so overdone, and stretched to the point of absurdity, I find myself having difficulty taking it seriously.
It mean, it's getting to the point where the whole thing tastes like narm, and that's not a good thing. The first chapter was interesting, these past two chapters weren't.
4159023 But it was supposed to be a self-insert fic... She's writing about something that she went through, and the whole point of this fic is to talk about this subject in this way.
If you don't like that kind of fanfic, that's fine, but don't start reading them and then complain about it.
4149465
I don't think it's too out there. One of my co-workers sort-of tried it on me. Failed, miserably, in part because I'm significantly taller and stronger, and able to ignore her efforts. Against Dash, she'd be the smaller one, and generally speaking, unable to defend herself.
I'm not saying it should be done, because it's really stupid. And most people I know accept that I simply am not interested in sex at all. (Then again, most of them are on strange parts of the scale too, so...). Honestly, I can see Dash's problem, though actually experiencing the fears she does about telling everyone is probably overblown. Even AJ, after it's explained, should be able to accept it as just another detail of life. Like my co-workers.
4162815 I feel the same
4162991 Okay, number 2, Pinkie was only thinking that because she liked RD and she didn't like her back.
Of course, I don't believe in either of those phrases (though you don't really know about the "sex" part in "sexuality" when you're eight).