• Published 20th Mar 2014
  • 623 Views, 19 Comments

The Bottom Shelf - JakeAndDollars

Just a place to display our little odds and ends, anything that never really went anywhere but might be worth a laugh.

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A Post Never Planted

A Post Never Planted

Sweet Apple Acres; 5:47 am.

With a tired squeak of its worn hinges the front door to the Apple family home swung open, revealing the freshly woken red stallion as he ducked through, glancing about as he crossed the small covered porch.

Big Mac loved the morning, everything about it was just so peaceful, so, calm. Inhaling to the point his massive lungs could hold no more he waited, savoring the invigorating tingle brought on by the cold crisp air, the surge of energy that cascaded outward from his core to every fiber of his being. Truly, this was what it was to be free.

His gaze slowly traveled about the yard before him, the tender spring grass glittering in the first fingers of Celestia's new sun, the arcs of light reaching for him, crawling across the dirt path leading to the old barn as if sent to greet him by the princess herself.

Mac allowed himself a smile before releasing the trapped breath to slowly escape through his nose, nostrils flaring as the now warmed air passed into the world. It was these private little moments he treasured, times when nothing else mattered and he could just stop and smell the roses. Even snag a few if no pony was watching.

Pulling out his signature stock of straw he placed it between his teeth, letting the tattered piece of plant hang loosely out the side of his mouth. This, coupled with the donning of the old pulling harness passed down from his father, and Big Mac was ready to face a new day.

Letting out a confident snort the big red stallion made his way toward the edge of the old porch, each board telling a story through the shallow groans and shrill squeaks, troddings of countless hooves, be they family, friends, all had first been welcomed by this humble assemblage of wood and iron nails.

Big Mac remembered these things, these and many others as he strode forward, calm and ready to start the day anew. Boldly he went, the day already coming to order in his deceptively meticulous mind, a well earned trait bestowed upon those that spent their days in the field under toil and sun. The life of a farmer; the life of a giver.

This would be a good day, Mac could feel it in his bones, fortune and prosperity were with him in these steps. And with them, he could not lose! A smirk worked across the pony’s muzzle, a feature few could claim to have ever witnessed cross the gentle giants countenance. These were his steps, the steps of a stallion, a stallion who could take pride in a job well done! And today, his job was to finally finish the new fence!

Without so much as a pause to his stride Mac stepped off the edge of the porch, eyes fixed steadily upon the barn ahead of him, the familiar goal the only thing occupying his motives, urging him forward, to improve, to endure, to provide prosperity for his family. With apparent exaggerated slowness his hoof descended, carving a swath through the still air to the ground below. If only hooves could talk…


Working his lips Big Mac twisted the wheat stalk between his teeth a few times, the only sound coming from the hen house as a rooster crooned. Macs eyes betraying little, though any that knew him well would surely be keeping some distance. Finally, with a heavy sigh, Mac looked to the ground. “That dog…”

Author's Note:

Hey all, Dollars here again. Now, anyone who keeps an eye on our message board might remember seeing a new story advertised a while back, went by the name of, “Big Mac Builds a Fence.” Well, that story has since been more or less cancelled, I simply didn’t have the time for as many projects as I had going at the time.

Never the less, several incomplete chapters are still floating around my hard drives so, I thought I’d clean one up and see what you all think of it. Who knows, maybe if enough of you want more I’ll stick it back in the forge and see what I can make of it.

Until then, I submit for your inspection the first chapter of, “Big Mac Builds a Fence,” to ever see the light of day. Enjoy, or don’t…

Poop humor... -Jake

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