Make Like A Unicorn And Leave
A waxing Moon was just visible over the road which led between Sweet Apple Acres and Ponyville, bright and beautiful and completely being ignored by the two ponies traveling down that path on a crisp autumn night. The one whose neck was wrapped in an elegant scarf was trotting along in a relative degree of peace, feeling rather content with the evening's results. The other, flying far too slowly at a ridiculously low altitude while grumbling to herself in a constant flow of minimal-volume, high-level invective, was... not.
The Bearers' seasonal card game had just wrapped up.
Typically, they played seven-card stud poker, with low-limit betting and a preset maximum number of raises per round to go with what any professionals would have thought of as a ridiculously minimal initial chip pool. (The fiscal aspects of the gambling had initially been established as a silent group agreement to try and avoid doing any real damage to Fluttershy's fragile finances. The preventive measures hadn't seemed particularly stupid after the first game saw the animal caretaker fly off with virtually all of everypony's bits while apologizing all the while for her run of good fortune. The seventh I'm-so-sorry sort-of-triumph hadn't been particularly grating either, at least not while everypony remained at the table.) The setting was rotated between residences, which had already put them in the clouds once and had the second Twilight-assisted ascension scheduled for winter. The group was hoping the long interval had allowed that future host enough time to figure out the assembly of a proper snack tray, followed by not noshing on ninety percent of it before everypony else showed up.
On this night, it had just been the six of them. Spike had never shown the slightest amount of interest in the game: even when the table reached the library, he treated the playing hours as a mini-holiday, secure in the knowledge that his sister was too busy miscalculating odds to be calling for the sucker-intended non-reference books which would further worsen the mistake. (On-table references had been banned after the second game anyway, as most of them had realized that professional gaming guides were typically written by professional gamers -- who were hoping ponies with a head full of confidence, arrogance, and exactly the wrong facts would wind up at their tables to collect the real education.) No other Ponyville resident ever participated: they saw the cardboard battle as being Bearers Only, and so none had ever asked. The only pony to occasionally push up an extra bench and steadily redistribute her chips was Luna, who had been invited to the winter game which had followed that one special Nightmare Night. She had been nervous, tense, still unsure of her place among the group -- but as it turned out, there were only three problems with her attendance: having enough snacks, arranging the table to accommodate an alicorn body, and locating all the lightning damage the morning after a particularly bad beat. The junior Princess came when she could (which wasn't often) and insisted that the game rotate to Canterlot for the spring session -- but Twilight had immediately begun to obsess about being caught gambling right under Princess Celestia's snout, and any mention of the inevitable approaching party produced a unique variety of shudder.
They typically kept things civil while at the table. Postgame cleanup duties were assigned by low draw from the deck immediately after the last round, and those who had picked up that last bit of bad luck were expected to bear it with grace, staying through every hour required to restore the hosting site (which was one more thing that had froth manifesting in Twilight's coat). The ponies on the road under Moon had been the recipients of deuce of amulets and four of horseshoes, and one of them had taken fortune's assignment with the bearing of a lady. The other... not so much. Because for one player, it had been a night of nights, one which had seen the unstoppable pattern of all her previous games crest in a new personal record -- one which, given the limit betting and maximum raises of the rounds, was unlikely to ever be topped.
"Fourteen minutes!" Rainbow suddenly shouted. "How could my chips only last fourteen minutes?"
It hadn't been a particularly positive record.
Rarity sighed. She rather doubted any attempt to calm the weather coordinator would have a beneficial effect, but she still felt duty-bound to try. "Rainbow, dear --"
"-- I don't get it! I read the stupid books! I know about bluffing and folding and all that dumb stuff! But every single time I get a good grouping, somehow, everypony knows it! They all get out early and I don't pick up any chips! And when I'm bluffing, that's when everypony just has to stay in, that's when Fluttershy -- Fluttershy! -- re-raises me! And then my chips are gone after fourteen minutes, fourteen Tartarus-freed minutes, and all I can do is wander around the table, grab snacks, and give advice on everypony else's groups! Again!"
The only shock was not hearing poker itself repeatedly being declared 'lame'. "Rainbow, if I could just speak for a moment --"
"-- every time, Rarity! Every single time! I've never left the table with so much as a tenth-bit in my saddlebags! No matter what cards I get or how good my luck is or if Fluttershy -- Fluttershy! -- actually sits an entire series of rounds out for a change, I always go broke! And now I'm heading back with you, we're moving so slow and all I can think about during this dumb trotting pace is those card groups and the betting rounds and how everypony just cleaned me out in fourteen minutes..."
The pegasus stopped. Closed her eyes. Landed.
Softly, words she might not have been aware of at all, certainly words never intended for Rarity to hear: "I hate losing."
The unicorn, who had been perfectly content with the fun of the game, the quality of the company, and very nearly breaking even, closed her own eyes for a moment. Was this the time to tell Rainbow? Could this be the moment when the pegasus would actually listen? There were so few chances to catch the weather coordinator with open mind and ears rotated forward that each had to be treated as precious, the rarest gem carefully extracted from the unyielding ground -- but to tell her this, something which was almost guaranteed to upset her even more while knowing that the creation of an even more extremely unhappy Rainbow Dash was something which too often came with consequences...
But Rarity was her friend. And frankly, somepony had to tell her.
"Rainbow -- may I speak to you for a short time? I will keep it brief, I promise... I have a shop to open tomorrow and I know your afternoon shift promises to be rather strenuous, given the birthday party snowstorm you were told to set up for Diamond Tiara. But you will understand that what I say next comes from frankness and sincerity, with your knowing none of my words are meant to be cruel?"
A bare half-whisper: "Uh-huh."
Rarity wondered if the agreement had been made to the entire statement.
She took a deep breath. Oh, how to say this, what was the best way to get it through... Subtlety with Rainbow wasn't automatically doomed to fail, but the pony attempting such a tactic would generally be advised to fold. The pegasus generally didn't speak subtle and could get even more fed up while both scavenging for unfound nuances and demanding the pony speaking with her define the stupid word already. Yes, perhaps directness was best this time. Let the pain come quickly in the hopes that it would fade at the same rate. Tear the bandage off the wound and go.
"Rainbow -- you have the single worst poker face I've ever seen."
The cyan head snapped up. Magenta eyes sprung open. "...what?"
Much deeper into the night, Rarity would consider that the single utterance had been the flagpole from which the first danger signal had been flown and wonder why she hadn't stopped herself right there. But just then, she was rushing towards what she hoped would be a miraculously open window, hoping her words would get through before the gravity of ego slammed it shut -- and so she made her next mistake. "Oh, there are times when you're a fairly capable liar, especially when you've had time to plan. But even then, for those who truly know you, there can be signs -- and when you take a seat at the gaming table, all of those signs are magnified to a degree nopony can ignore. I truly believe somepony who had only made your acquaintance a moment before seeing the first card would be able to determine the rough ranking of your grouping, and for those who are rather more familiar with you... Rainbow, dear, there is something about playing a card game which renders you into an inadvisably-opened book, and the contents take but seconds to memorize. I know your habits. I have your signs memorized. Everypony at the table does. And so we all know how to respond to any grouping you possess, every time. In this particular instance, the time elapsed was -- fourteen minutes."
She also should have paid attention to the slight rotation of the ears, that first ruffle of feathers... "Prove it. Name one thing I did tonight which you could read. Just one thing everypony knows about when I've actually read so many of the dumb books..."
Another deep breath, enough to make her saddlebags shift. "From left to right, you always arrange your card suits in the following order: wings, amulets, horns, horseshoes."
Rainbow blinked. Just once. And then the magenta eyes locked into a hard stare. "How -- how can you know -- I don't do that! I don't!"
Rarity sighed. "You do. Every time. It is visible in your expression, in the way your tongue works about the corners of your mouth and has a distinct position for each of the suits. Your eyes widen and narrow according to how strongly you feel about the value of what you've just drawn. And that is the least of it, dear. Your mane is cut short and does not particularly fall to the front. By contrast, Fluttershy's obscures much of her face. I cannot readily read an expression I cannot see, which is one of the many reasons I have so much difficulty determining what Fluttershy has in her grouping. She is inherently bashful and conceals aspects of herself on instinct, which extends to the cards in front of her. You are naturally brash and constantly declare yourself to the world -- making the true value of your grouping part of the continual shout."
Softly, far too softly for the pegasus, something else Rarity should have picked up on in the midst of a lecture more suited to Twilight, "Really."
Rarity nodded and, now truly starting to get into the spirit of long-delayed education, added a reassuring smile before continuing on her merry verbal way. "Truly. Furthermore, to go deeper into the comparison with Fluttershy, she rests upon her bench throughout the game and remains almost completely still, typically moving only to collect her card, place a bet, or confiscate our chips. You? Simply do not. It is a well-established habit of yours that when you are among us, you are prone to hover somewhat and in this case, that means you are frequently found above table level. Gauging the value of an opponent's grouping is not simply a matter of reading facial expressions: it is the evaluation of body language." Something she wasn't doing just then, fully lost in the teaching experience. "You place yourself physically above us and thus expose your entire form, allowing us to see every page in a rapidly-flipping text while simultaneously turning prismatic tail into more of a prismatic tell..."
She couldn't help it: that good a spontaneous verbal jest was worth a small, friendly laugh, and she did so in the most courteous, ladylike way possible.
Rainbow was still staring at her. All four hooves remained planted against the road. A brisk fall breeze shifted feathers. "You're telling me..." still so soft "...that you always know what I'm thinking. Feeling. What I'm planning. Everypony does. All the time."
"Well, no," Rarity hastened. "Not at every single moment, of course, and hardly in exacting detail within each second of a normal encounter. But it generally goes back to what I said a short time ago: on some level, you declare yourself, and that aspect is virtually all the time. For some reason, it simply becomes more magnified when you take your somewhat-mobile place at the gaming table. I rather suspect some small part of it comes from your following the advice in those books and while I know we are all proud of the way you have taken the written word into your life, your choice of texts may still require the occasional nudge of advice --"
"-- let's make a bet."
Rarity blinked. (Rainbow did not.) "...a -- bet?"
"Yeah. Right now. You tell me what I'm feeling, then you tell me what I'm planning. If you can do both of those things right here under Moon, while I'm on the ground, with no cards anywhere in sight, you win."
And now she was starting to worry. "...what would I win?"
"If you win, you'll find out."
"Rainbow --"
"-- we are not moving another hoofstep until we play this round." The pegasus' stance widened slightly, her wings flared just enough to see. "So come on. One more grouping. I have two cards and you've got to tell me what they are. First card, Rarity -- what am I feeling?"
Rarity's field exerted without her conscious knowledge, slightly-spiking soft blue borders surrounding and twitchily adjusting her scarf, which suddenly felt too tight around her neck. "I feel my gameplay quota has been more than met for the evening --"
"-- not a step, Rarity." It was almost a purr, kin to the luring sound Opal made just before the claws swiped. "Come on... you know you can win, right? First card..."
The next breath felt far too shallow. "What you're -- feeling?" A tiny nod and unblinking eyes.
She could have lied, of course. Tried her own bluff. But with the way Rainbow's gaze was locked onto her, in the midst of that unyielding scrutiny, Rarity was suddenly aware of every tell she personally didn't have and was probably about to manifest -- plus she didn't know what the consequence was for being caught in a falsehood -- or, if she somehow got away with it, losing. Not that winning felt as if it would be much of an improvement...
This breath gave her just enough for the words and nothing else. "You are... rather upset, more than a little frustrated, and -- looking for somepony to take it out on?"
"Ooooh, you're good," Rainbow falsely smiled. "So what am I planning?"
She wondered if her tail was completely between her legs. "To... take it out... on me?"
The open lie of a smile showed teeth. "Winner!"
From her position in the tree, Rarity stared down at the ground, propped her chin against her left front hoof, and tried to find exactly the right words to summarize her feelings regarding the situation.
"Oh, bother."
Which somehow seemed as if it would have been more appropriate to being stuck halfway through a ridiculously narrow Diamond Dog hole.
Rainbow had, in virtually all aspects, chosen well. The thick trunk didn't start to branch out until reaching a height of roughly ten times Rarity's own, and those branches were sturdy ones: the cluster of three natural joists Rarity had been draped across were more than stout enough to collectively take a pony's weight. The stranding tree in question was right next to the road and afforded Rarity a perfect view of the total lack of traffic under Moon. So she was at no risk of falling and her humiliation was fully visible to anypony who might pass by once Sun had been raised. Well-executed, really.
Rarity had every confidence that Rainbow intended to leave her there until well after Sun became a factor. The pegasus had scooped her up between outstretched forelegs before Rarity could try to dodge, dropped her (about a hoof-height) into the leafy prison, and then declared that she'd be back to pick Rarity up when -- well, since Rarity knew exactly what Rainbow was thinking at all times, then that meant Rarity already knew and so Rainbow didn't have to waste any time with saying it. And the pegasus had flown away, the fading laugh getting merrier with every extra flap of distance gained.
Oh, Rainbow would be back for her -- eventually.
"I suppose," Rarity said to nopony in particular, "I am meant to be contemplating my lesson at this time. The one centered on how, should one somehow manage to both have and for some unknowable reason retain a friend whose ego is particularly well-developed, one should perhaps consider carefully the exact location of the border between constructive criticism and 'anything Rainbow Dash might take the wrong way' which, in my experience, can be just about everything, thus making it nearly impossible to attempt helping her in any way whatsoever. Yes, what a horrible mistake I have made. Truly a violation of social graces which nopony of true class ever would have committed. Certainly I shall never attempt to help a friend with a problem ever again..."
She sighed.
"Except that I will," she concluded.
But somehow, Rainbow Dash, you are going to pay for this one. Oh, there will be a balancing of the books, and you will know when it happens...
Well, she was hardly going to just lie here among coat-staining autumn leaves and rough bark and oh dear Celestia was that tree sap spreading into her coat, right where her right hind leg was draped across the final support branch? And were there insects in this tree? Was that crawling sensation along her coat being produced by tension or from something with six to eight legs? How many times was she going to be dirtied and stained and possibly bitten? (Her tail lashed along her body, brushed off nothing which was actually there.) She would probably be plucked out of the tree seconds before the streets of Ponyville would be at their most occupied, flown through the town on display as a tangled, dirty, stained, sticky, bite-covered mess and the sheer spectacle of it, the humiliation...
"I have to get down from here before she returns," Rarity told herself. "I must."
So... what were her options?
It was rather too far to jump: any attempt to propel herself into the air would certainly end with her body on the ground, although how much would arrive intact was a question she didn't particularly wish an answer to. Climbing... well, for that, she would have to be a Diamond Dog, minotaur, or another of Equestria's species which wasn't a quadruped: pony limbs simply didn't orient for wrap-and-shimmy, and as for the prying grip which could come from some form of digits... no. Ponies were among the worst climbers in the world, knew it, and thus seldom attempted the feat unless they were mistakenly attempting to achieve what all three felt would be a rather unique cutie mark which would surely come by the twentieth attempt, especially given that the first nineteen hadn't seen them achieve so much as a quarter body-length over the ground and a mere hoofwidth past that had to be a manifest-worthy event.
If I was a pegasus, I could fly down.
For that matter, if I happened to be an alicorn, I could also fly down.
And while I am at it, if I looked up at Moon and screamed at the top of my lungs, it might descend to Equestria, press its mass against the top of the tree, and slowly bend the entire thing towards the ground.
Actually, this tree is not particularly springy and would simply have the wood shatter.
Rarity discarded the option.
Magic?
Rarity's field strength was -- average. It always had been, always would be. She did not possess the raw mass manipulation to move herself -- and even if she had, self-levitation was one of the rarest tricks known to unicorns: there was something about projecting a field backwards which just didn't come naturally. Still, it wasn't as if she didn't have time to practice.
She thought about her rated maximum lift, compared it to her own weight, and then considered what would happen if she did somehow manage to surround herself with soft blue glow and yanked up at the exact moment she pushed herself out of the tree. Would it slow her fall enough to create a comfortable landing?
No. I could throw scarf and saddlebags down to the road, do everything I could to lower my mass short of taking off my own tail and mane, and it still wouldn't be anywhere near enough. Besides, I am not sacrificing these saddlebags. I put seven hours into the stitching of that pattern and there are path-bordering rocks below, all of which I may not be able to make out in Moon-shadows. This night is already bad enough.
Levitating rocks from the ground and holding them as a rough stepping-stone staircase formation -- that she could do. Unfortunately, it would serve no purpose, because her field still wouldn't be able to take her weight impacting them. Hardly a problem for somepony like Twilight, but for a strictly average field...
...Twilight.
She has taken me along in her teleports. I have slipped between with her. Several times. I have somewhat more than a rough idea of what the feel is supposed to be.
How much raw strength does it require to simply create the entrance and exit? Surely not too much, correct? Many unicorns can manage the feat and they are hardly all close to her level. Furthermore, while I do know longer journeys require more energy, I would hardly be going any distance at all.
And then there was another voice in her head, one which was also her own. It insisted on speaking up at times like this. It always made sure to get the full set of words in, and that statement was You Are A Fifth-Year Dropout And As Such, Advanced Magical Experimentation Is A Truly Bad Idea.
Rarity nodded to herself and then did what she always found herself doing with that voice: ignored it.
"Let me think..." she mused as her corona ignited. "Yes... it is a slight adjustment here --" (the glow around her horn briefly went angular near the tip) "-- and then just a tiny bit here --" (as the intensity near the absolute edge tried to go into more of a blue-white, as the base thickened with the first hint of a second layer) "-- with a tiny amount of flare --" (the tip glow became brighter, expanded into a tiny sphere as her corona went fully double) "-- and then one makes certain to have a full understanding of their arrival point, confirming there is nothing which can produce recoil in the area, gathers the energy and... lets... it... go!"
The tiny sphere swelled, cast the shimmer of Rarity's signature across the woods.
A bright light flashed.
Rarity, who had forgotten to close her eyes in time, spent several heartbeats blinking the dazzle away while her head gradually cleared from the drain of the unaccustomed exertion and the full-body light coating of sweat spread out the tree sap. It took some time before she had enough sense of herself to fully reorient on her surroundings, and a few more seconds to reconcile the changed view.
She was still draped across three branches, ten times her own height above the ground. But the patch of ground she was most immediately above was now coated in a thin layer of shimmering blue glass.
There was a faint sound coming from somewhere above her. Nocturnal animals moving in the trees. The brisk breeze (with the temperature now dropping quickly) moving branches in such a way as to create what felt like a rather stifled noise. Or it could have simply been the universe snickering at her.
"...oh, bother."
It still didn't seem to fit.
It was truly becoming cold now. Not winter chill by any means: that was still a moon and a half away. But it was that special trick of autumn, a quality which Weather Bureau manipulation had never seen any need to alter no matter how many protest letters came in: that variable day could be followed by horrible night, seventeen layers in a constant state of shedding and donning in order to find any degree of comfort at all, and trying to design for such, keeping it all from clashing...
Rarity shivered, and her vibration sent a few coat-staining leaves drifting to the ground.
"Vengeance," she muttered. "Oh, there will be vengeance..."
There was a sound of wings.
Rarity instinctively glanced up, momentarily ready to, if not take it all back, then at least hide every last sign of it should Rainbow have come to fetch her. But the sound had been too small for the full wingspan of a pegasus, and all that happened was a little more vibration on her middle support branch, which felt odd against her barrel.
She glanced over to find a brown bird perched on the wood, about half the size of an owl while having twice the penetrating stare. The head tilted: left, then right.
"I could explain myself, I suspect," Rarity told it, "but you would never believe me."
Another head tilt, then back to center.
Well, the company was somewhat welcome. A fair percentage of Equestria's avian population was nocturnal: having birds traveling under Moon came as no surprise. It was just one of the many factors which made Fluttershy's working hours into something close to a constant drive and made the others wonder how and when the animal caretaker ever managed to sleep...
...Fluttershy.
For lack of one pegasus...
The entirety of Rarity's attention focused on the bird.
"Can you understand me?" she urgently asked. "Are my words at all familiar?"
The head tilted left this time. The beak opened slightly, closed again at the end of the chirp.
"Wonderful!" Rarity said, and meant it with every bit of her heart. "I would truly appreciate a small favor at this time, one I fully intend to repay with birdseed and honey cones hung outside my window for as long as we both live. I am asking, if you have nothing else planned for this evening -- or for after midnight -- whatever time it currently is... at any rate, should your schedule be free, could you possibly pop over to Fluttershy's residence for me? I'm certain you know her. Every bird seems to. And when you arrive, simply tell her where I am and what the situation is. Oh, and of course you should pass on my apologies for having woken her, but I am simply in something of a minor emergency and her help is what I truly require. Would you do that for me? Please?"
The bird hopped closer. Its head bobbed up and down.
"Thank you!" Rarity cried. "Truly, my gratitude will know very little in the way of bounds! Is there a special kind of seed you prefer? Simply let Fluttershy know and she will pass it on to me. Now, do not worry: I'm sure word around the woods has spoken of my cat, but I will hang the seed cone somewhere she cannot possibly climb out to... very well, that may take some work and possibly asking Twilight for a permanent levitation -- is such a thing possible? None of my old classes suggested... oh, listen to me... thank you! I will await your return!"
Two more hops. A pair of head tilts.
"Is there something else?" Rarity inquired. "Another item you might desire? I admit that I've never designed clothing for your form, but I can see where a small scarf might set your colors off rather elegantly..."
The bird hopped onto her neck. The beak jabbed forward.
"OW!"
And then it flew three branches up to weave the long purple hair into its nest.
"...or perhaps," Rarity very nearly hissed, "you are simply a fully uncomprehending bird, one who somehow possesses absolutely no normal social relationships whatsoever..."
The bird's head appeared over the edge of the nest. It stared down at her. Regarded the state of its construction-to-date. Seemed to be thinking about the ample supply of free building materials available below.
It dove.
Chirps. Chatters. Beak almost rattling with outrage.
"Oh, do shut up," Rarity crossly insisted.
The bird did no such thing.
"Well, if one does not wish to be held motionless within a bubble of field, then perhaps one should reconsider the option of trying to build a nest out of unicorn hair, should one not? I have given you more than sufficient opportunity to vent your frustration, and believe me when I say that I am fully capable of clamping your beak closed for the duration of this night, a night which the chill has ensured I will stay fully awake throughout. I gave you the benefit of the doubt on the first release and since that is the reason I will be spending hours trying to find a way to discreetly close that gap in my tail, I am not overly inclined to trust your learning curve a second time. You have told me how much you hate me. You have fully expressed your newfound devotion to destroying all things pony, and your accurate aim has placed a surprisingly large dollop of that expression in my mane. All things considered, I am not particularly inclined to grant you another parole. Unless, of course, you are now willing to admit that you have at least vaguely heard of the cottage near the fringe and are willing to seek out its mistress...?"
A single avian shriek.
"As I thought. It's a pity, really. Every being should make some attempt to extend its contacts, even outside their own species. You should truly consider expanding your horizons. I could assist in the initial introductions. For starters, after I am freed from this confinement through no help of yours, I could escort you to the cottage myself."
Another, only louder.
"Or to begin with something simpler, we could take a shorter journey together."
Ear-piercing.
"And you could meet my cat."
Silence.
Moon was out of view now.
Was it truly this cold, or was it simply her focusing on the temperature when there was so little else to do? Rarity had tried to pass the time with other things. She had attempted the envisioning of new dress designs, but every one of them had found itself caving inwards and tightening into the full-body immobilization devices known as freezers which were used on criminal pegasi. She'd still passed an hour plotting out the best colors to clash with Rainbow's coat.
The surprisingly large dollop of pony hatred had solidified beyond all hope of casual grooming, although not past stink.
She had tried magic again. Small-scale wood sculpture, that was something she'd picked up in her fourth year and it hadn't even been from a class: she'd simply become bored one day and gone into the library to consult one of the few texts available concerning the use of magic in art. (She had spent roughly two weeks of her life combing through the place in desperate hopes of finding anything concerning the use of magic in fashion. She had failed.) The working had seemed easy enough and a little experimentation had proven her impression correct. It had helped to pass the time, for if nothing existed (or was taught) to assist in the creation of miniature dresses, then at least she could make her own toy dressmaker forms. And so a little more school time had simply passed instead of rasping against her coat.
Wood sculpture: an old friend, seldom visited in the days since she'd found freedom -- but she did take time now and again to drop in and see how it was doing, catch up on that tiny portion of old school times which she didn't want to forget. And it had occurred to her that if it was possible to mold branches into the shape of pony bodies, then it should certainly be within the working's potential to extrude ledges from the trunk. Wide, stable platforms creating a winding circular stairway to the ground.
She had gathered her strength, as much of it as she had to give without releasing the stupid bird. Her corona had gone double again, twice in a single night, and the thought of pushing to the full triple had terrified her. But it hadn't felt necessary: her field had coated the entire trunk below her, she had felt the wood shifting, and...
...well...
...she was still in the tree.
Although anypony who came down the road would now have an additional sight to regard.
For lack of anything other than plotting and shivering to do, Rarity took a moment for glaring at the bird. It maintained the horrified silence of the last three hours. And then she stared at the sky.
"I care about her," she whispered to the stars, her volume almost too low to be picked up by her own ears. "We all do. But Luna's tail, there are nights..."
No response. She hadn't expected one.
At a more normal volume, "Sun will be raised soon, I suppose."
Still quiet.
"I did wonder if this was secure enough for me to sleep. To call out for Luna from the midst of dream. But the chances of having such an effort work... and she has so many things to do... And sleep would not come. Three branches covered in rough bark and tree sap and insects which I am sure are here add up to be several thousand threads short of an adequate count."
The night ignored her. She shivered again.
"And if I were to make the classic error of voicing my false belief that at the very least, things could not possibly become any worse?"
The rain began.
Sun had arrived. The new day was slowly beginning to warm her chilled coat, although drying was going to take decidedly more time. And there was a squeaking sound approaching from the Acres.
Rarity's drooping ears just barely found the strength to perk.
Of course. It's a market day! That's the cart! "APPLEJACK!"
The squeaking stopped. "Rarity?" The accent had never been so welcome. "Ah'm comin'!" The sound of wheels accelerated, accompanied by hoofsteps at full gallop, that suddenly-wonderful hat came into full view. "Where are you? Sound off, Ah can't see y'right now..."
And her relief was so great as to make her completely (and very temporarily) forget what she currently looked like. "Up here!"
Applejack started, all four hooves parting company with the earth in a single shocked jump. It took a moment after landing (used to adjust her hat) before she could look up.
The farmer snickered.
"Yes, yes," Rarity said in a rush, "I am quite aware of how this must appear --"
"-- y'remember the camping trip?"
"Applejack, this is hardly the time --"
"-- all that stuff y'hauled along for no real reason? An' Ah kept tellin' you that the idea was t' get back t' nature instead of bringin' everythin' that wasn't it with you?"
Rarity sighed. "Yes, I seem to recall."
"Ah didn't think y'were gonna take me this seriously!"
Rarity possessed her soul in patience and waited for the laughter to stop, which took about two minutes.
Finally, Applejack shook her head hard enough to fling away the final tears of a slightly dimmed helpless amusement. "So whatcha doin' up there?" With a grin, "Goin' Crusadin' for a new mark? 'cause that's the only thing Ah can think of which would make a pony try somethin' this stupid... Or is there an inspiration up there? Some kind of dye y'can only get from fall leaves? Runnin's next week... shoulda waited..."
She tried not to grit her teeth. She would not yell. Not at somepony who could help. "Applejack, how do you feel I got up here on my own?"
"Ah dunno," the farmer grinned. "Got the hang of that wing spell, maybe?"
"Hardly." She'd pushed back the well-earned phobia just before sunrise, barely long enough to fail at that too.
"Then Ah guess y'got a ride --" stopped, and the green eyes went over the entire situation again. "Rarity... what happened t' the tree?"
"You mean the bark?" That got a stunned nod. "I rather did."
"So -- y'made all those little pictures of Dash?"
"Yes."
"Includin' all the ones where she's bein' --"
"-- yes. Every last one."
"An' -- that little bit near the base, where she's... um..."
"I cannot see it from my current angle, but please trust that my efforts produced that one too."
"An' -- the bird?"
A little sharper than she would have liked, "This is possibly not the ideal time to talk about the bird. Applejack, please help me. I've been up here all night, and I would rather appreciate any effort to assure I will not be up here all day as well."
Applejack looked up again. To Rarity's level, and then a bit beyond. "Ah dunno..."
And these words nearly sliced off the branches. "Don't know about what?"
"Ah dunno how y'expect me t' help, Rarity. Ah ain't no pegasus: can't fly up and getcha. Ain't a unicorn neither: can't float y'off. What are y'thinkin'? That Ah'm jus' gonna buck y'down?"
Rarity forced a slow breath. Two more. In, out. She felt the bark grate against her coat.
"I believe," she managed to get out, "that you have a lasso?"
"Y'think Ah jus' carry it with me at all times?"
"Yes."
Applejack couldn't quite hide the smile. "Fine... but it's not long enough, Rarity. Ah'd have to toss it up. Ah know y'can catch it an' tie it around y'rself, an' then Ah could lower... but it won't reach the ground. An' it won't get y'low enough for a safe drop neither."
Rarity briefly closed her eyes, made a series of mental measurements. "You're quite right. Very well. Do you have a longer one?"
The blonde mane kept moving after the head shake stopped. "Gets too long an' Ah can't manage the cast."
She could picture that as well. "In that case, I will request a simple favor. Please divert to the library before you reach the town square and wake Twilight? Tell her exactly where I am and ask that she come get me down?"
This smile was fully out in the open. "Ah dunno, Rarity... Ah'm running kind of late already, what with talkin' t' you an' all... Ah don't want t' risk losing mah space..."
"Applejack?"
"Yeah?"
"Look closely at the images carved into the tree bark."
"An'?"
"Wherever you see Rainbow Dash appear, substitute yourself -- oh. Very well, that will do." She turned to the bird. "You know, if she simply put in that kind of effort during the actual Running, she might beat Twilight for once..."
"Pinkie?"
"Hi, Rarity! Wow! What did you do to this tree? Is that one near the base even physically possible?"
"Pinkie, please tell me Twilight is right behind you."
"Um... Rarity?"
"Pinkie, I am truly hoping that your next words concern a rather exact estimated time of arrival while your expression is simply meant for a minor joke you were about to play on me and have just reconsidered."
"Twilight sent me..."
"Yes, very good so far, I certainly understand that Applejack is at her stand and cannot relay a message herself."
"...and she said to tell you, 'Remember when you and Rainbow hung me off the town's center fountain after the speed dating experiment?'"
"...yes."
"Okay. And if you said that, I'm supposed to say 'So do I.'"
And Pinkie trotted away a little too quickly, chased off by Rarity's escalating scream. "Ten minutes! We left her there for ten minutes!"
And finally, there was Rainbow Dash.
There was also Twilight. Along with Spike, Pinkie, Applejack, and somepony had made the effort required to get Fluttershy away from the cottage for a few minutes. Five on the ground, one hovering in front of her.
Fluttershy gasped.
"Yes, Fluttershy, I am aware of how this looks. Of how I look, of how everything looks, and I am beginning to gain some faint awareness of what is probably worked into the base of the tree --"
"...Beauregard! You naughty bird! I know you hated that medicine I had to give you, but how dare you take it out on my friend! Send him down right now, Rarity! Oh, I know a bird who's going to get a talking-to..."
Rarity closed her eyes and let the field bubble float towards the ground.
Rainbow watched it go. "So -- how are you feeling?"
Rarity didn't look at the pegasus. Or anything else. "Applejack," she said pleasantly, "who's watching the stand?"
"Big Mac."
"And why didn't I see him go down the road?"
"Had Spike send him a letter an' told him t' sneak behind y'for the best view."
"...right. Thank you for coming, Spike. This experience would in no way be complete without your presence."
"Oh, don't say anything against Spike, Rarity," Twilight grinned. "He saved you."
This deep breath rasped the last bit of fur off that particular section of barrel. "He convinced you all to finally come and get me down?"
"Oh, they were going to do that anyway," Spike sighed. "I just flamed the camera."
Yes, excepting the little dragon, a personal dark was certainly better than anything else she might have available to look at right now. "Thank you, Spike. Your status as a gentledragon is without question. Now -- if everypony has taken a permanent image for their internal film -- might it possible for me to descend now?"
Rainbow laughed. "Come on, Rarity! It's not as if anything bad happened!"
"Which you know for a fact," Rarity said.
"Of course!"
"Because you stayed here all night watching me to make certain nothing went wrong."
She opened her eyes, locked onto the hovering magenta ones, and was happy to see the shock.
"Um... I wasn't..."
"Oh, you were," Rarity told her. "I know. At first, I wasn't sure I'd heard you snicker after that first failed attempt to escape. But then, when I deliberately prodded with a feed line, one I knew you would not be able to resist... well, the rain certainly came promptly enough, did it not? You fetched a cloud and camped out all night, keeping watch above me not just to witness my ongoing humiliation, but to make certain nothing intruded which would make a prank turn into something far worse. You stood guard for the full duration, did you not? And for that -- you have my thanks, Rainbow. I appreciate that you care about me and did not wish to see me hurt. I truly do. Now -- if somepony would help me down?"
Rainbow easily managed a midair shrug. "Okay," she reluctantly admitted. "I hung around. I know the whole road is in the settled zone, but -- you didn't have any way of getting down if anything showed up anyway. It was sure fun to see you try, though! You kept me entertained all night, Rarity! I bet you don't know just how funny you really are. Consider us even for everything you said, okay? Unless, you know, you can't really understand how sincere I am right now just by looking at me and I have to say a few more things to clear stuff up..."
"I understand," Rarity told her. "Down -- please?"
Rainbow carefully scooped her up and brought her to ground level, placing her carefully so she wouldn't slip on the blue glass.
Rarity carefully stretched out, working through every aching joint, which seemed to be all of them. After her neck stopped cricking, she glanced back at the base of the tree and judged that it was physically possible, but a touch of strategic double-jointing wouldn't hurt. "Very well. And now I believe I have a very long spa experience ahead of me. Twilight, in a moment, I will request that you teleport me first to my home so that I may feed Opalescence, then directly to the spa, as I would truly rather avoid parading myself through town and do not wish to hide at the Acres until Sun is lowered, much less neglect my cat for a moment longer."
Twilight's smile was gentle. "Of course, Rarity.. and I hope you know I just got stuck with the memory for a second, I was always going to come and get you... Are you ready to go now?"
"Not... just... yet."
And Rarity turned to face Rainbow Dash.
"Yes," she went on. "As much time spent at the spa as I like, and then to bed. For even with as many problems as it sometimes brings, I retain a rather minor advantage in my career path. It is true that I have no employees to take over for me when I am ill or indisposed, and must take a chance on losing sales every time I shut down the Boutique -- but at the same time, I am self-employed. The only pony I answer to is myself. Should I wish to take a day off, I do. And so I choose to spend my time in spa and sleep, hoping the customers who find a locked door will return tomorrow. It is a fine thing, being able to freely make that choice. I truly wish you could say the same, Rainbow."
The pegasus blinked. "...what?"
"Well -- you are not self-employed. You work for the Weather Bureau. As town coordinator, you have some discretion regarding the advance scheduling of your shifts and distribution of some portion of the total workload, but you can hardly take a day off simply because you wish to. And when Mr. Rich contacts the Bureau personally and requests that nopony but the Bearer herself should go through the extremely strenuous effort of setting up a highly localized birthday snowstorm for his daughter... with my knowing you are all out of personal days for the year, unable to falsely call in sick with the direct gaze of the Bureau upon you, and having just been awake all night... well, I truly wish you could say the same, Rainbow. That you could somehow dodge out of your assignment. But you cannot. No matter how hard you try. Twilight -- now."
Rarity fed her cat. She went to the spa and took every hour necessary for getting her back into an acceptable condition, which put her into early afternoon. And then she trotted home, went into her bedroom, put on her sleep mask, and snuggled her body under the sheets, Opal curled up against the base of her restored tail.
The Rich estate was much too far away for any sounds to carry, of course. There was no real way to pick up on the subtle noise of Rainbow Dash having to jerk herself awake every other minute, much less the frustrated demands of Mr. Rich wanting to know just why the special snowfall wasn't working out exactly as he'd requested or how the exhausted pegasus could keep veering into the side of the house, and surely it was impossible to truly have the seemingly-endless whining of his angry daughter, taking it out on the pony she'd see as responsible, reach white ears.
But in her dreams, Rarity heard it all from a mere two body lengths away. And smiled.
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I think you mean 'difficult'.
Weirdly this is the second story in which a pony is assaulted with bird mess I've read recently.
Ouch. Remind me not to get on Rarity's bad side.
4096757 :
And the lesson here is 'Never think that because you managed some kind of wrapup on the mistakes in the main text, you actually saved yourself any embarrassment.' Thankee: fixed.
Huh, I think I just lost all sympathy I had for Rainbow Dash in "Stupid Direction-Face". Serious jerk move, Rainbow.
Hee! Rarity is just so well-suited for comedies.
One teensy spelling mistake - there's an "achool" there, which by context should be "school".
4096991
Rainbow's always been a bit of a jerk, if one with a good heart.
4097199
I have absolutely no idea how that one got past me. *sigh* Thankee and also fixed.
4097257
Well, the view counter doesn't update immediately, so this story has more than 87 views right now. And, iirc the feature box looks at how fast a story gets its views/likes, not just the total number. Also also, the popularity of the other stories in the box might be relevant.
The Lesson of the Day : Never peave off a unicorn who knows how to carve trees and who has a very good imagination. Otherwise you may find that creativity angled in your direction, as well as every tree in Ponyville sporting your face and other... um... parts.
4097257
In all honesty, I treat the workings of the Feature box like Vorbis. As in 'You do not ask someone like that what they are thinking about in case they turn around and say "You."'
I don't know what's worse, vengeance from Dash or verbal assault from Rarity.
Great story!
The Bearer of Honesty, ladies and gentlemen!
A fantastic one-shot. Rarity's poise and dignity always make her a ripe target for a little humiliation, though she handled this quite well. I have to admire her willingness to experiment with various ways of getting down. (And really, considering all the ways teleportation can go wrong, from Harry Potter splinching to Star Trek technobabble, she was extremely lucky just to conjure glass.)
Also, using the term "grouping" instead of "hand" was clever and subtle.
In short, thank you for this.
I cannot find anything to nitpick on this one.
And I'm a bastard who finds something wrong to nitpick with almost every story I read.
And you made me chuckle.
Congratulations, thumbed up and fave'd.
Hilarious, as always. I don't know what we'd do without you, Estee.
Pahahahaha!
Excellent work, as per usual!
Revenge, Rarity style, elegant, delivered calmly, and with great panache...!
Good on Spike too...
You can't possibly expect me to believe that Rainbow is stupid enough to leave a pony up in a tree all night long because she wanted something to take her frustrations out on. Even she isn't that stupid. I further refuse to believe that all her friends wouldn't be mad at Rainbow for doing that to their friend. Rainbow doesn't exactly do cruel things to her friends for shallow anger.
That's my take on it. Yeah, I'm a negative nancy.
So, let me see if I've got this straight.
Rarity's vengeance was "reading" that Rainbow Dash was watching over her, and bluffing that she didn't know, so Rainbow Dash would keep doing it and be too tired to whip up a bespoke snowstorm.
And then showing her hand. Er, grouping.
I'm not sure how that could be more perfect.
4097322
Not rigged, rigged would suggest certain authors were more or less likely to make the featured box because the creator of the box likes or dislikes their work. The featured box is simply angled towards popular stories as opposed to good stories, which, all things considered, is the best they can do if the website admins want to keep the featured box fresh and full of good content (If it were based on the top rated stories, it would potentially go to a story with one thumbs up, and, therefore, a 100% rating. If it were based on the number of faves, it would never change)
An excellent story, friend. Truly wonderful.
I have this huge grin right now. It always pleases my nostalgia to see people reference Winnie the Pooh.
Does "stud poker" have any additional meaning or connotations for ponies that it doesn't for humans?
I must say that all your comedy fics are extremely entertaining. Please bring more.
One word to describe this story: circumlocution.
That means "an extremely roundabout way of saying something".
Used in a sentence: "the story was admittedly funny, but suffered from so much circumlocution that it was almost too insufferable to sit through."
This was a thing of weirdly horrible beauty, and one of the best things I've read all month. Thank you for an hour well spent. Also, you definitely write one of the most convincing Raritys I've ever seen on the site.
I saw this and immediately knew where it was going because I've seen my pet bird do this. Apparently it means he's claiming territory.
4099996
Stud poker is the ponies' version of strip poker... a prerequisite is that they wear officially-acknowledged gowns (for mares) and suits (for stallions) as their buy-in. Of course, said clothes are much too expensive for poor Fluttershy's fragile finances, so these six won't be playing any time soon.
Dash is mischievous, but not cruel !
Perhaps I'm just dense today, but I don't get what you're saying here.
4102052
The game occasionally rotates to Rainbow's house, which means Twilight needs to cloudwalk-enchant several players in order to prevent abrupt game dropouts. "Ascension" just means the altitude gain required.
Since I was pretty critical of On The Application..., I feel I owe you a critique of this story as well.
Your writing is still quite engaging, especially Rarity's voice. And the bit with the raincloud was quite clever - I really should have picked up on that sooner.
Your pranks are still a bit mean-spirited for my taste, but here at least it fits with the tone of the story. You also don't paint Rainbow as being in the right, which is a huge improvement.
I did find the rest of the Mane Six' reaction to Rarity's predicament puzzling. I get that Rainbow's jerkass tendencies were turned up to eleven for comedic effect, but why are the rest of them so blase about Rainbow stranding Rarity in a tree overnight? Especially with nothing to suggest the rest of them knew Rainbow had spent the night keeping an eye on her.
Overall I liked this one much more, kudos.
4102528
I assume Rainbow told the rest of them that she'd been watching over Rares before they arrived.
Are you bucking kidding me?! She tries to help Rainbow, and that's how she's treated for it?! And her only revenge was to go along with it cause Rainbow didn't see the consequences?! Oh, and she thanks Rainbow for caring, for caring?! At the very least she could have got hypothermia for bucks sake! And Twilight refuses to help her out cause she was left hanging from a fountain for ten minutes?! (which she totally deserved as I recall). If I were Rarity I'd say "buck you all, I have no friends" the moment I was back on the ground. How could anyone think treating her that way was acceptable, she was trying to help! I think they all owe Rarity a huge bucking apology!
4103559 You can assume that if you like, but the story never says that. And it doesn't really jibe with how she reacted when Rarity called her out on it. Plus, if Rainbow stayed there watching over Rarity the whole time, when would she have had the opportunity to tell the others?
502 Fiction? What kind of group is...
...oh.
Guess they picked up a lot of new members yesterday.
So...
4096991
4098467
4101990
4102528
4104193
...we now turn to the comedy portion of our program, in which I will attempt to explain how I viewed that which led to Common Misbehavior Issues Of Prismatic Pegasi (among other things) to absolutely no belief whatsoever. Please note that I am not trying to convince anyone of anything. This is the Internet and the next person to change their mind based on the words of another will also be the first. However, I do ask that you keep any attempt at Death Of The Author strictly figurative.
Additionally, I'm currently in an insomnia cycle, so hijinks may ensue.
(Incidentally, if you read comments before story, Spoiler Alert.)
Okay.
*deep breath, mostly because it may be the last*
I typically try to avoid the characterization of pure Rainbow Jerkass. However, when I work with her, I do keep some things consistent. She has an Ego. Her impulse control is typically on a level with Scootaloo and she's got the shortest temper in the cast: a bad combination. Among the Mane Seven, she's the most likely to seek a physical solution to any confrontation. There are confidence issues present, masked behind bluster. She's too competitive for her own good and feels anything she actually deems worthy of entering is an event she has to win. Admitting when she's in trouble or overmatched seldom happens: see Ego. On the whole, she takes losing about as well as -- *looks at calendar* -- a #1 seed who just went out against a #16 and if at all possible, she'd really like to blame the refs. She has major problems with apologizing because that means she was in the wrong, and will do twenty minutes of verbal somersaults to do it while not doing it. She also has a tendency to not necessarily plot out every possible outcome from her actions, and she rarely plans too far ahead to begin with.
And she pranks. Dear sweet pony gawds, does she prank. And it's not always well-considered or timed.
So here we are on the road under Moon (and to anyone peeking in from TV Tropes, it's a style choice). Rainbow has just lost. Furthermore, she's been consistently losing for a few years now -- and not only that, unless somepony else ran out of chips on a given night and tied her, she's been coming in last. She initially recognized that there's an element of luck to the game and that's why she didn't go up after the first beatdown. Or the second. But she's been told (by purposefully-distorting books which she actually went through the effort to read) that it's also very much about skill. So she studies and practices and does everything she can to improve and win this competition and keeps right on coming in last anyway. And incidentally, she's been getting her tail regularly kicked by Fluttershy.
So in Rainbow's mind, she's done everything right. She has been to the table enough times that any luck factor would have had more than enough chances to balance out. And yet she still went broke yet again -- followed by getting low draw from the cleanup deck and spending extra hours polishing up the Acres to Applejack's standards, which are not exactly spit-rub-go.
Rainbow is not a happy pony.
So she finally voices it -- something which isn't necessarily easy for her to do. Rarity talks to her. And no matter what Rarity meant, regardless of how she was trying to say it, this is how it comes across: 'We know exactly how to beat you. Frankly, we could beat you any time we liked and keep it up forever. You would always come in last , from now until the Princesses switched shifts. Oh, and incidentally, each of those losses? Entirely your fault in every way. Not only that, but you are so very easy to read, you'd be amazed by the number of other things we can beat you at. Oh, and I may think I've simply been amused by my own wit, but really, I'm laughing at you. Laughing. At. You... Loser.'
At this point, Rainbow's surface temperature could be applied to rock for creating Spike's next swimming pool.
So her temper flares. She makes a bad decision. She can't go after the pony who's beaten her the most badly because she doesn't prank Fluttershy. But Rarity is right there. Rarity has just humiliated Rainbow and now the favor will be returned. It's Rainbow's way of getting control back and winning at something, proving herself superior again. What will embarrass Rarity just as badly as Rainbow was just humiliated? A night in a tree ought to do it. And into the branches Rarity goes.
However...
...now we turn to a few of Rainbow's positive traits, things I also try to keep consistent when writing her.
She's a gracious winner (once the gloating stops).
While she's capable of nursing grudges, she frequently calms as quickly as she flared.
She will embarrass her friends with pranks and take them through humiliations, but she doesn't hurt anypony -- and she never inflicts more than what she thinks somepony can handle. (Her estimate can be wrong there -- but she truly tries.)
And she is not going to abandon a friend who has just been placed in a situation where the unicorn is potentially helpless should any disaster come along.
So she doubles back. She grabs a cloud and perches there, out of Rarity's casual viewing angle. And she watches. She wants to make sure Rarity's okay -- that this will not go beyond the level of prank-revenge. She's also amusing herself through witnessing Rarity's attempts to escape plus the interactions with the locals and my, isn't Rarity funny!
She can't resist a good feed line. She doesn't consider enough options to include chilling, although she would rescue Rarity if the unicorn appeared to be getting sick (and pegasi in this *groan* 'verse have little trouble gauging body temperature). But on the whole, she's standing guard. She will not fall asleep on that job. Because revenge is being expressed as a prank -- and nothing more.
Applejack comes by in the morning, hears Rarity call for help. She knows Rarity was carried into the tree and she's seen the images carved into the bark, so she's got a pretty good idea which pony did it. Then she looks up to Rarity's level again -- followed by going further up. And that's when she sees Rainbow.
So now AJ knows this is a prank in progress. Rarity's in good hooves. AJ's hardly going to interfere with a good prank. She may not know what triggered it and doesn't have to just yet, because that can wait for when it's over. It's a prank, plain and simple, and Rarity is perfectly safe whether the designer knows it or not.
Applejack becomes part of the prank.
She goes into town, heads to the library, tells Twilight (with Spike not hearing anything just yet) what's going on -- exactly as AJ sees it. Twilight is now part of the prank, along with taking the opportunity for a little delayed revenge of her own. AJ heads for the market. Twilight recruits Pinkie...
So what we wind up with is four Bearers helping Rainbow out with what they feel is something harmless, one standing guard, and one stuck in a tree. Oh, and a dragon who's more than a little peeved about how everypony else is taking this. Subtract one camera.
And over we go to Rarity. Who knows Rainbow has been there the whole night. Rarity knows who Rainbow is, even if she can lose sight of certain aspects while demonstrating that she's picked up a bad habit from Twilight. Rarity is fully aware that Rainbow would not abandon her, and so takes the time to thank her for that. Because they are friends, and two of the things Generosity grants are degrees of (eventual) forgiveness and, when needed, extra chances.
But...
...vengeance must be had.
And how does the vengeance manifest? 'Yes, I can in fact read you when we're away from the table. I do know how you act, think -- and don't think. I was perfectly aware that you would completely forget about your rather difficult, extremely strenuous upcoming assignment in favor of taking amusement from me. And now I will take amusement from your knowing that you cannot prevent me from anticipating you so very well. There is nothing you can do -- other than change -- which will make me overlook your very obvious weaknesses. You could have taken me back down immediately, or not started things at all. You did not. So everything which happens next, you did to yourself. I knew you would. And there is nopony you can blame but yourself.'
...yeah, that's gonna leave a (non-cutie) mark.
Okay, that's about all the futility attempt I can handle in one shot with this little sleep, so I'll just sit back and let the sound of everyone yelling at me keep me up.
And blast away, blast away, blast away all.
4105072
Those are a lot or words to say that Rarity and Rainbow have a rivalry because Rarity is smarter, more intuitive, manipulative, and socially skilled while Rainbow is more physically capable and min-maxes her specialties. And they both believe this makes them better than the other rather than as good as each other in different ways.
My take? Rainbow is blunt and Rarity is sharp as a tack. That can be taken in many ways... and I mean all of them.
4105559
You should see the kind of rambling pointless overdone futile effort I can put in when I'm fully awake.
To me, Rainbow and Rarity usually have a fairly minimal rivalry. They've learned to each appreciate what the other does, but it can still be hard to see the point. There can be touches of envy: Rarity knows the group would benefit if she was more physically capable, Rainbow has the very rare moment of wishing she could talk her way out of something. But they seldom find themselves in direct conflict.
However, when it does happen, stand way back.
(Side note: I think it's very easy for some ponies to feel as if Rarity is talking down to them. Price of accent and airs.)
Oh my god. I was glancing at the popular stories section, and I saw the short summary of this. And normally, that kind of short summary wouldn't really draw me to a story, vague as it is, but something inside me said "hey, maybe it's someone like estee," AND THEN
IT WAS ACTUALLY ESTEE.
Also, applying the most recent episode seems to have confirmed a bit about either earth pony geomancy or the power of a cutie mark outlined in Triptych. Maud can go through stone like a power drill.
Was a little worried at Rainbow's sudden OOC at first, but I should've known she'd be watching. That ending was great.
4105072
A very detailed and sensible explanation... just, not one I think actually justifies Rainbow's actions. I can understand why she could behave completely unsympathetically, but I still think she's behaving completely unsympathetically. If all the other bearers, being used to her, thought this was okay to go along with, then I think they're being dangerously callous about it and that an outside voice is needed to come along, take one look, and say "you guys have gone so far over the line that the line is no longer visible in the distance". I like to think that's what Spike did.
4105072
Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts. I'll try to come up with a response that explains my point of view without too much verbosity - that may take a bit.
One point I'd like to go ahead and address is Applejack noticing Rainbow. You mention in the story that Applejack looked beyond Rarity. But that's it - there's no hint to the reader that those words have any significance. It seems like you were spare on details to avoid giving away that Rarity knew about Dash. Which leaves the reader no way of reconstructing events even after they know what's up. For all her folksy ways, Applejack's not a particularly stoic pony. It seems unlikely she'd have no reaction upon spying Dash. You've already established Rarity's eye for detail, so she should have noticed AJ's reaction.
4105072
Nothing you've said here makes the prank any less mean-spirited. And while it may be on the outer edge of believable behavior for Dash - given her impulsiveness, temper, and disinclination to think about her actions - it's far too mean-spirited for the rest of the Mane Six to just accept.
As an author it's your job to put the characters through interesting experiences. Since you're the author you know Rarity isn't going to be hurt, emotionally scarred, catch a cold, or be anything other than be mildly discomfited from this. And of course Rarity's not really hurt at all - because she's just a fictional character. The trouble is, you write the Mane Six as if they also know that.
For socially conscious Rarity public humiliation is a greater pain that the physical discomfort of a night outdoors. Yet her friends all show up to mock her when Rainbow comes to get her down.
Applejack has no reason to carry on with Dash's prank. As an experienced outdoorsmare she would know better than anypony how cold, miserable and unpleasant a night stuck in a tree might be. Also I can't say that Big Mac would pass up the opportunity to ogle Rarity's derriere. But AJ doesn't seem like the sort to take advantage of her friend in that way.
Pinkie Pie loves a good prank. But to her a good prank is one in which the prankee laughs along with the pranker. Rarity's not laughing.
Twilight, well in this universe, Twilight has reasons why she might be okay with this. Although, since you've now established the prank in Application was only for a few minutes, I think she'd consider an entire night stuck in a tree a wee bit excessive.
And then there's Fluttershy - sweet, everkind Fluttershy. She'll scold the bird for crapping in Rarity's mane but gives Dash a pass? The same Fluttershy from Five Hundred Little Murders? I just can't buy that.
If this were clearly setup as an AU where the Mane Six are jerks - like Friendship is Witchcraft or Letters from a Disgruntled Friendship Student - that would be one thing. But, without any clues to the contrary, we readers take these as canon versions of the Mane Six and as canon versions they're out of character.
Except for Spike.
EDIT: 05/20/14 removed one sentence for being overly judgmental.
4105072 Oh I completely understand everyone's motivations in this story, I do, it's just that they treated Rarity terribly. Honestly she was trying to help her friend. If I had been Rarity, after being left in a tree all freaking night, I would have yelled at Rainbow. Something like "this is how you repay a friend who helps you? Or something similar, guilt trip her like crazy, cause that's what she deserves. I get Rainbow's flaws I do, but Rarity's 'revenge' (which I still think is pathetic) doesn't address those flaws at all. What angers me most is that Rarity made one comment, a comment meant to help, and nearly all her friends punish her for it. I mean if I were friends with them I'd be afraid to say anything around them, with friends like them who needs enemies. I mean if Rarity had said something truly insulting and not meant to help then I could understand this reaction, but really if this is what can happen for one little comment, I wouldn't want them as friends.
4106773
4106786
Oh, good: kept my perfect record of making things worse through any poor attempt at reply intact. I was worried about actually staying in place for once. I really need to have more faith in myself.
I would give up here and go to bed, but insomnia.
...incidentally, this is why you never see me comment on someone else's story. I feel obligated to quarantine the disease.
*sigh*
So rather than go any deeper into this through answering fresh charges, I'll just close the window before Still Worse results.
4106965 Aw, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I get what your story is, I really do, I just don't think the Mane Six are those kind of ponies. However, they might be, and that's fine. Hey, your story got me thinking and feeling things, that's always good. I did find myself chuckling at many things in this story, I just felt everypony's reaction to what Rarity did was a bit over the top, but hey it did make for a good story. I think Rarity needs to get some serious revenge on all of them though (except Fluttershy and Spike), especially Rainbow Dash. I hope you keep writing stories like this, please don't be discouraged.
Note about me: Love RD, really don't like Rarity. That said, this little ditty was magical. It had the perfect mix of Rarity torture and karmic justice to make it all work, and not have it all cascade into torturing Dash back. Of course, Rainbow got her just desserts, but it didn't make me upset like it could have. However, I can't really say Dash is that readable. Sure she isn't terribly subtle, but I'd leave 'hand' organization patterns to Twilight. Plus Element of Honesty Applejack couldn't have been great at poker. But... I digress.
It was well written, for sure, as well as being funny and memorable. (Seriously, I'll be remembering 'that one fic where RD put Rarity in a tree' for quite a while) Nice work!
4107828 lying and choosing silence are two very different aspects. If AJ were to play poker and instead of speak or anything and maintain silence while also not really playing and instead mimicking her opponent I imagine she would be quiet good at poker.
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You don't have anything to apologize for, nor should you ever censor yourself to avoid upsetting me or backtrack your words unless you've truly changed your mind. And those last two apply to every reader on every story, every time. I haven't deleted a comment yet. I'm aware that my subconscious can get an oar in and sometimes, there are things to be found which I missed.
I just have a few factors in play right now. One is the insomnia. Secondary: I feel like I have never explained anything in a Comment section and been believed. It's an exhausting streak on a Rainbow level.
And there is a line between 'This is what I-the-reader perceive' and 'This is what I know you meant, so just admit it already!' I always accept the former, no matter how much I disagree with the contents. The latter... that can grate. Sometimes I might falsely detect a crossing. On other occasions, the line gets vaulted.
Tell me what's on your mind, every time you see fit, for that universal "you". But unless "you" are ready to James Randi-prove your psi on the spot, don't say you read mine.
Feel versus know.
(However, there's clearly an argument to be made that I haven't caught up on sleep yet. And this post may be it.)
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Hence why I stopped.
I know my argument isn't the most solid, but nobody is that readable. I realize it was played for laughs.
4106965
But at least you haven't been accused of pianocide yet...
Quick editing note: "I gave you the benefit of the doubt on the first release and since that is the reason I will be spending hours trying to find a way to discretely close that gap in my tail, I am not overly inclined to trust your learning curve a second time" uses the wrong from of "discreetly."
4105072 This story was a blast to read! Just hilarious. I also loved your characterization of all the ponies involved, and your detailed vision of them really cemented that.
4110832
But the other spelling looks so much more elegant... Fixed.