• Member Since 6th Sep, 2013
  • offline last seen Yesterday

McProky


Hello! I'm /Mc/Proky and I live in Czech Republic.

T
Source

Scientist, who made breakthroughs in teleportation technology teleported himself into a land full of ponies, while being 1 milimeter big! Will he survive is this world, where everybody is trying to crush him underhoof?

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I thank to Proof-reader and editor, Miracle for helping me with this

If you have any ideas on where the story could go next, PM me and I'll tell you, if I consider placing it in. Please, do details ;)

Picture of this fic is not mine. It belong to really great artist Alloyrabbit

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 131 )
Comment posted by Garnet Shield deleted Apr 17th, 2014

Ha, poor guy; he's in for a bad day. :pinkiecrazy:
(Love the cover art, btw. AlloyRabbit does great stuff!)

Grammar issues but since English isn't your native language its understandable. I can still read what your typing. Interesting story and it looks promising. Keep it up!

Okay we didn;t drink water but I'm guessing Luna's Saliva?

4249249
Sweat, but saliva will be someday too ;)
First few chapters will be unaware, trapped somewhere on Luna :D

You gotta fix these spacing issues, man. Every line is broken.

Did you write this in Notepad with "Word Wrap" enabled? That might have been it.

Will offer to help with formatting and whatnot. I see a promising story here.

Sweet Luna's ass, do you know how to space?:trixieshiftleft:

Comment posted by IridiumHoof deleted Apr 18th, 2014

4251485

4250186
I know about it, i wrote it in notepad, because i needed it there to be it on Deviant Art. Next time, I'll use Word. And it will be fixed soon ;) don't worry

This looks great. I agree with the others, some issues, but considering this is a first story and you're not a native speaker, it looks promising.
Eagerly awaiting more

Macro/micro fetish fuel. Nice.

Interesting. There aren't that many good small human in Equestria fics around these days, and this one doesn't seem terrible.

I'll keep my eye on it.

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I'll think about it. Thanks! :ajsmug:

The premise and stuff is good. The story so far is excellent, and i would be willing to help you edit. Or you could request an editor in the overly extensive editor group however you have to use gdocs. It makes it much easier and stuff. I really like what i've read so far and I think it would help smooth things out with the language issue. Excellent so far, but a good editor will help a lot.

...I... Am quite intrugued... I do want to see more of this. And I would enjoy being an editor if you would like.

...Uhhhh.............


For a second there, i thought it was something REALLY bad.......


..So i don't get more bad thoughts, where is he ON Luna?

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So far, in her shoe under the bed. My inspiration was a chapter on one FiM micro interactive story. It no longer exist :(

love the concept of the story so far, though I think that it could be... lengthened a bit? like alittle more detail into whats going on I mean. It almost feels as if it is alittle rushed, here in the early chapters. But that is not a problem that will stop me from liking and reading the story! :)

Grammar seems to be good. and by that, I mean that no errors stood out enough to bother me. so I may have seen one or two errors, but just overlooked them.

Cant wait for the next chapter, and hope to see what will happen to our friend Andrew!

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Thanks you! My problem is that i always make things fast, even if im trying to do it patiently. I hope i'll fix that problem soon ;)

i will read when i wake up its 5am must sleep.:ajsleepy:

4256863 that was the quickest reply ever but i just realized that im idleing in tf2 and if my dad catches me on the pc im fucked so i have to stay up for another hour and then i can sleep. thanks for the reading material i bet it will be good.

4256868
I know that feel :D Fortunaltely for me, since he was too tired, he though it was a dream :D

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If your open to advice, I learned this the hard way: Quality over Quantity. or in this case, Quality over Speed. made that mistake with my first fanftc and posted the first 5 chapters in less than two weeks! looking back now, I cringe at what I could have done better if I hadn't rushed. :twilightangry2:

Not to say that you are pumping out chapters too fast! :rainbowlaugh: doing pretty good truly. :twilightsmile:

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I had the first one written for about a month, and i needed 1K words, so it came here just now :D

The last paragragh in chapter two felts a little weird. But meh.

I also feel that chapters could be a bit longer. 700 words is not a hole lot. Perhaps try to shoot for 1000 that would be nice.

Other then that I have not seen to many major errors. I seen near the beginning that you put NOT instead of No I think it was but besides that I enjoy the story. Can't wait for the next instalment!

facepalm.de/images/facepalm.jpg
This is reminding me of Attack on Titan all over again
[youtube=youtube.com/watch?v=EFLRGVHCvik]
~ Eric

4259509
Well we can't all like the same things now can we?

>less than 1000 word per "chapter"
disappointment....

Chapter 3 is now in progress :ajsmug:

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Okay, 1300+- words, now only to translate it to English, then to Proof-edit.

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Just send me the draft in email and I'll the editing done for you. I'll be busy for a few days so I can't guarantee when. But it WILL get done before the end of the week. I promise. You can take me for my word.

Comment posted by McProky deleted May 2nd, 2014

How about a servent/councilperson (royal adviser on a single subject (i.e. finances ) get tia's attention and when she turns back to continue almost stabs herself in the nose and then she spots andy, or maybe she almost sticks luna in the nose as luna is bending over to hear the conversation or luna sees something colored differently than their meal and leans in to inspect it and then discovers it's andrew.

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Don't worry, just need a few more ideas for ending and i shall begin ;)

4327213
What's that something to do with this? :derpyderp2:

Great chapter hope he makes normal size..

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