• Published 13th Mar 2014
  • 860 Views, 24 Comments

Rainbows and Muffins. - Fonypan



Derpy goes on a date with Rainbow Dash. It could have ended better.

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Oops.




Derpy and Rainbow Dash have been spending a lot of time together lately. Those two could be seen on weather duty together regularly. Being Captain of the Ponyville branch had its perks, and Rainbow didn’t mind when Derpy asked if she could have her schedule changed so she could worked along side the best. Plus Dash could keep an eye on her to help minimize the collateral damage.

After a few short months, the two really began to hit it off. Rainbow knew Derpy had feelings for her, but never would have imagined reciprocating them. Their love started out simple, and stayed simple. So fast food was just perfect for the pair of love birds, or love pegasi.

Every date to date had been at Hay Burger. But neither complained, because Derpy knew Rainbow Dash could care less about fancy food. And Derpy wasn’t to fond of getting dressed up to eat a meal. She prefered naked anyway. Mostly because she usually get tangled and stuck in a fancy dress.

To Derpy, nothing in the world meant more to her than Rainbow Dash. Okay, muffins were a close second. But nothing other that Rainbow Dash and Muffins. But she really did like the horseshoe fries at Hay burgers. To derpy nothing in the world was as important to her as Rainbow Dash, muffins, and horseshoe fries.

“So... what did you have planned for us tonight?” Asked the rainbow maned pegasus as she and her date entered Hay Burgers.

“Its a surprise! But I promise it will be a good one!” said the blonde maned pegasus with a large eager grin as she looked at rainbow Dash and a near by butterfly.

“Cool, I can’t wait!” said Rainbow Dash as the two walked up to the counter to take their orders.

As Rainbow Dash finished her order, and went to take her seat, she noticed Derpy whisper into the cashier's ear before following Rainbow to a table with the tray of food. “What was that about?” asked Rainbow Dash.

“Oh, nothing.” She lied badly with that grin that always gives her away.

“Sure... any way... you said you wanted to ask me something?”

“Excuse me but, are you Rainbow Dash?!” Asked a young pegasus as Derpy was about to ask her a very important question.

“Why I sure am. What can I do for you?” she asked.

“Can I get your autograph?” asked the filly as she held up a napkin and pen.

“Sure thing kiddo!” said Rainbow as she took the pen in her mouth and scribbled out her handcock on the tissue. The filly brushed her hoof on Rainbow’s shoulder, giving Rainbow Dash a weird vibe.

“EEEE!!” squealed the filly as she took off out the door.

“Well that was strange.” shrugged the cyan pegasus shaking her head as she looked back at Derpy.

“Oh uh... ” Derpy froze, waiting for her date to bite into her burger. “Uhh... Rainbow, hows your burger?” She asked biting into her own.

To this Rainbow Dash took a large bite, smacking her lips as she chewed. She opened her mouth full of food to speak “Its really—” She suddenly stiffened up as she quickly found it difficult to breath.

Derpy trying her best to stifle her squeal of delight, she was about to get engaged. Because she knew Dash had to have just bitten into the ring she had snuck into her hay burger.

Rainbow Dash dropped to the floor clutching at her neck, she couldn’t breath! She started to panick. In her panicking she tried to upright herself, she knew what to do. all she had to do was slam her belly into the back of her chair to perform a self heimlich maneuver.

“Don’t worry Rainbow Dash! Derpy is here to help!” Derpy yelled as she came to her marefriend’s aid, knocking her back to the floor. Quickly deciding to perform cardiopulmonary resuscitation on the choking pony she took a deep breath as she grabbed Dash’s head. She then locked her lips to Rainbow Dash’s lip and forced air into her muzzle. Causing the ring in Rainbow’s throat to lodge itself further down Dash’s windpipe, cutting her air flow completely.

Dash’s panicked kicking was starting to slow to week twitches. Her eyes full of tears as they slowly rolled up into the back of her head. She stopped moving.

“NO NO NO NO!!!” Yelled derpy as she tried compressions on Dash’s chest.

The crowed in the restaurant looked on in horror as Derpy began to cry. “No... this isn’t happening... Its just a bad dream...”

A red and white carriage pulled up outside. Two stallions in nurses uniforms stepped off of the carriage and quickly ran inside, stopping just in front of the crying Derpy as she clutched to the lifeless form of her special somepony. “Oh my.” said one of the medics.

Derpy Looked up at the medics. “I just don’t know what went wrong...” she said as she sat quietly and totally helpless.

“We’re sorry... but there is nothing we can do... she’s gone.” Said the second medic. “We will have to take her away... okay?”

Derpy didn’t say anything, only gave a tiny nod. She watched as the medics wrapped Rainbow Dash it in a cloth, pick her up and set her on a gurney, and wheel her to the carriage. Derpy sat utterly alone and perfectly stock still on the floor of the restaurant as the carriage slowly made its way back to the hospital.

“Derpy?” spoke one of the nearby patrons. A yellow earth pony with orange mane and tail. “Do... are you going to be okay?”

Derpy didn‘t move. Didn’t even acknowledge Carrot Top. She just sat there, tears rolling down her face. Her one and only special somepony... the one pony who made her feel good when everything else was going bad, was gone.

Other ponies slowly gathered around the grey pegasus. “I... I was going to ask her to marry me...” quietly said the grey pegasus, to which the whole crowd stepped forward and gave Derpy a hug, causing her to break down into a pitiful sobbing mess.

Comments ( 24 )

>rated everyone
>Rainbow dies

Seems legit.

4078720
Applejack, what's the scouter say about this story power level?

4078914 its... IT'S OVER 9000!!!1!!11!

4078951
9000! But that's impossible!

4078679
Clearly you haven't watched the Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy.

I... wow... um... that came out of nowhere. I'm honestly not sure whether to downvote or upvote this. This story in a little over 1,000 words completely shocked me. The chapter title I think is a bit of an understatement. I don't see why it has so many downvotes though. I also don't see any direction this story could go from here. It was well written for cramming a backstory and a whole series of events in the span of a 3 minute read, but that's kinda the end to the story, unless there's slice of life stuff afterwards (meh, but would give some more reading time). It would be cool to see this rewritten into a 5 or 6 chapter story, maybe 2,000 words a chapter, just to better explain how, where, why, and when they met and the dynamics of their relationship. For what it is at this moment, it is actually quite well written. However, the end (Warning! Spoiler:Dash's death) was a bit rushed. If Rainbow Dash was substituted with a random OC with a similar personality, she wouldn't have had enough emotional buildup to make an impact on the reader, but because Rainbow has emotional buildup via the shows, the end does have a small impact. That's why there needs to be more on the background of their relationship.

I hope that rambling helped. :derpytongue2:

4085313
I understand that its a bit short, I suffer from chronic writer's block. It was originally supposed to be a tragic comedy, but as I wrote it, the tone just didn't feel right.

But I might have an idea for a sequel in mind. And if you can catch the hint I already placed in this fic, props to you.

:raritydespair::raritycry: I'm sorry,that was too sad a shock for me. I'm really really sorry but I have to unfavourite,it hurt too much:fluttershbad:

4079062 Guys, you're too funny; please stop.

idk why this has such a low rating. its not that bad. i found it kinda funny tho I can already guess what was gonna happen.

seems kinda hard for such an object to to that

4102923 Shh...
I realized that about four sentences into righting this story... but I'm not very creative.

4103116
opps that was suppose to be hidden but didn't work. I edited it. how do you make text do that?

4104043
like this

[spoiler ]like this[ /spoiler]

This.. actually hit close to home than most sadfics ever did. To be fair though, everything did went wrong and we might just see a grey pegasus dangling down a tree a few weeks after this event...


Aaaaaand I just made it a lot more depressing... or funnily depressing... Furessing?

It's... I don't even know what to say about this. It was good, interesting even. I didn't hate reading it, but it feels wrong to say I enjoyed it. It was surprisingly sad for such a short and simple story. I guess some more development and background might have been effective at filling out the story and also would have added to the shock/sadness at the end. I can somewhat understand where the downvotes come from (Dashie dies, and a bit abruptly at that) but I still think this is worth my upvote and favorite.

Wow, Ditzy, it really went wrong that time, didn't it? :derpyderp2:

Things ah learned from this story:

The "tragedy" and "comedy" tags have really similar colors.

7206289 Unfortunatly.

I guess in the back of my mind I always knew that "screw-up Derpy" (one of many iterations of the character) would one day really hurt someone by accident, but it's not something I expected to read about. Can't say I liked it. That being said, the writing was solid as was the plot, so I'm not going to blast this with a downvote.

The end caught me completely off guard. Only now noticed the Tragedy tag.

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