• Member Since 6th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen Mar 30th, 2020

An Unimpressive

Ex-EqD pre-reader who doesn't like shipping that much but seems to write a lot of it.



An unfortunate event gives Princess Celestia a fresh view on her life by forcing her to see the world from a very different viewpoint. With Equestria changing around her, she is faced with a personal crisis... if she can ignore how cute a certain lavender unicorn suddenly looks to her.

Featured on Equestria Daily!
And some site about horse porn!
Liked this story? Read the sequel.
And the story this was a sort-of prequel to.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 187 )

Clap clap clap.

Tracked to read later :rainbowkiss:

What did just read? Ok... Vim good story, the main part isn't my cup of tea but the rest. Seeing what Discord did to Celestia while the 6 were running I liked, along with the clash between the two, good characterization for her too (not a tyrant nor a troll, but really does care for the ponies). Just the middle... *shivers*

Haha, it's here! Magnificent, can't wait to see the reactions...

Fantastic! For a bit there, I was worried it would turn into an average "Princess Molestia" knock-off, but you quickly jarred it off that course and managed to turn it into something at times funny, touching and strange; In other words, a great read! :rainbowlaugh:

Thanks: that's exactly the reaction I was looking for.

Very well-written, kudos!

Twilestia ftw, that is all.

370810 You seem to be involved with all the best twilestia, so I have one question for you...


Yes I am. :trollestia:


That's what I figured... Vim you trolled me, congrats


This. That guard is going to have some interesting memoirs.

Only you could have written this story, Vimbert. Only you.

That's why Spike got so many letters at once! Should have known!:rainbowlaugh:

That was pretty damn amazing. A Twilestia fic without Twilight being present or more than tangentially involved with the story? I am impressed.

And now I kinda wanna see more of Eagle Eye and his ongoing struggle to suppress his inner squealy, tail-hiking mare. And his horrible tendency to be trapped in compromising scenarios with every variety of superhunk.

The story came about from my desire to answer two questions:
1. What the hell was Celestia doing while the mane six were trying to take down Discord?
2. Why did Spike get so many letters at once?

Also, I challenged others to write rule 63 Twilestia, but no takers. So I decided to do it... sort of.

I know, right?


This is now my headcanon for Celestia's activities during Discord's resurgence. Congratulations. :pinkiecrazy:

Nice timeline coinciding there!

This story is part "homoerotic," part "oh god why," part "sad..." and all awesome.

Now all we need is a story where Eagle Eye and Twilight meet.

seriously though, this story is very good.

>There was no way a relationship between Twilight and I could work, as much as the thought set a part of me pining in regret.


What happened to Luna?
Softer side

That was great, but I now need a giant amount of brain bleach, shudder, nervous eye twitch

Excellent story I give thee 5 out of 5 mustaches:moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache: oh and a rainbowdash:rainbowkiss:

Yes you are I love composure !:twilightsheepish:

this was a nice read, i got weirded out at first, and i like the tie in with spike. :rainbowkiss: nice job.!

371155 The entire time I watched that episode, I wanted to know where Luna was! She was only in one episode in season two! I don't know about you but I'm really pissed!:flutterrage:

this was a really cool read. Gotta love the humor though to be honest. Although I wonder, how interesting would it be to see a sequel where Celestia does approach Twilight.

Very sweet and terrif stuff! I'd be interested to see more about eagle eye and crew too.

I must say that was an interesting look into the princesses mind, and if eagle eye was to press his advantage he could do much for the lonely princess.

Interesting story :twilightsmile: It'd be nice if it was continued... with some side stories with Eagle Eye.


At first I just kept laughing at Celestia's Discorded behaviors... then it got to the middle part and I was like :twilightoops:
Then there's the Spike tie-in... excellently done and very comedic.
Celestia's realization of what she did was what kept me reading and you didn't disappoint.
Excellent work.

372005 I wonder that for EVERY episode (with the exception of Episode 4)

That is all.

Hmm. I wonder if evolution couldn't shed a little light here. <egghead> The genotype/phenotype expression don't always follow an obvious or direct cause/effect relationship; especially during dynamic changes. </egghead>
For example, I doubt thoughtless love was the emotion that Discord most wanted to invoke. Celestia's feelings of strong friendship for Twilight may have been what protected her from becoming what Discord intended, not a seed he worked from.

372271 All I know is she better be in 'The Canterlot Wedding'/'The Royal Wedding' episode! If not, I'll just go cry in the corner....again.:ajbemused:

Inform me on what the hay this story is really about or I not read/favorite/thumbs up


It was, at best, tangential to the story, so I didn't include it; however, I didn't want people asking me "BUT WHAT ABOUT LUNA"

This is a bit of a prequel, actually.

Eeeyup. That's "headcanon", by the way, unless you mean to say that I have a weapon attached to my forehead. Actually, that's more awesome. I'm going with that. :rainbowkiss:

Science is hard and Discord's motivations are a bit unclear, so I'll just say "Sure, why not?"

It does beg the question, what happened to Luna? Celestia must have been unable to reach her for a reason...:trixieshiftright:

all i can say is, this was great, and it ties right in with the actuall story without altering anything at all. you did good

Actually, in this story, I don't even think I want to joke about Twiliestia. The mind-rapey aspect makes it...

You know, it makes it hard for me to overlook all the other things that make Twilestia a little weird. I mean, think of how much pain and agony I had to go through in "Eternal" or Varanus has to go through in "Composure" to make sure that everything is on the level between them...

Well, thanks for reminding me that my interest in this pairing probably makes me a bad person, forcing Celestia into a compromising situation, I guess.

This looks great! Can't wait to read it! (and delete this pointless comment :derpytongue2:)

Wow, that was pretty awesome. You sir are a slightly more magnificent pony among a group of pretty awesome community of ponies:pinkiehappy:

We're all a little cracked, and both of your writing is goddamned fantastic. Twilestia is weird, yes, but it's a veritable gold mine for conflict; there are so many problems the pairing has to overcome for it to even pretend to work that you can't just write off the ship as "And then they became pony lesbians. The end", like other pairings might be able to get away with. It's a concept that is rich with story potential and can lead into some heavy themes with ease, so never feel bad for writing one of the best Twilestia stories out there. (Full disclosure: real life has kept me too busy to read all of Eternal, but what I've seen I adore.)

Forgive me, if I had actually said all that aloud, my sarcasm would have been much more obvious. Twilestia is, as you say, more interesting for its weirdness than disturbing in any way.

Not to rush you or anything, but I am looking forward to your final verdict someday! You piqued my interest forever ago by being just about the only person not drooling over chapter two back when it was first released...

Ah, ever the problem with the internet: the lack of inflection and tone. You'd think we writers would be able to overcome that. :derpyderp2:

I hope to read some on Wednesday, assuming life doesn't blindside me and distract me from ponies.

This story is weird as hell.

Good weird.

But still.

Wanderer D

Damn it Vimbert my mouth hurts from grinning through the whole damned thing! :pinkiehappy:

What the hay did I just read? Well all I could say is this one is written pretty damn well. And aside from me being weirded out about having 2 guys just go swayback mountain in the middle there, but it is a good way of letting Celestia as a character and her going on in her head about the notions of Twilight Sparkle. All in all a good read and I hope top have to read your future stuff...:yay:

I enjoyed this quite a bit. Had that smile/cringe dynamic. (You know the one. Death by snu snu episode.)

I considered wrapped a wing around him
Wrapped should be wrapping

Did you make Celestia male just to try a form of borderline R63 Twiestia?

The only thing that bugged me was the scroll sending being an accident. that was one of my favorite parts of the entire series so my irritation is based on heavy bias rather than legitimate criticism.

I liked how Eagle Eye was conflicted between want and do not want at times. I felt for purely comedic effect this could have been played up a bit more.

Other than that I'm not entirely sure exactly what the point of Discord's prank was. The way I see it either:
1: It was more or less harmless and he just wanted to mess with Celestia and make her look ridiculous and get in a scandal while playing with her emotions. (This seems pretty tame compared to what he did to the Mane 6, completely turning them against themselves.)
2: It was more sinister than that and he was planning on having Futa-Molestia *shudder* go on a spree of "very bad things" and it was only incredible luck that one of her first potential victims had such a strong resemblance to Twilight.

Curses. I get two editors, look over my own stuff multiple times, and I still miss stuff.

#2 was a little closer to what I had in mind, but #1 would work as well. The main point was to put Celestia out of action so he could deal with the Elements of Harmony.

Thanks for your thoughts, as always; I swear, I overlook half the implications I put into my own work.

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