• Published 10th Mar 2014
  • 1,617 Views, 22 Comments

The Muffin House Rules - Brolkier

Something seems different about Ponyville's resident mailmare, but nopony can quite put their hoof on it. Whatever it is, it's causing quite a stir in Ponyville, and everypony can't get enough of her.

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Act 4 - Daddy, where's mommy?

Act 4 - Daddy, where's mommy?

A few days had passed since Derpy’s surgery, and she was really starting to get the hang of her new eyes. Most notably, during her job as a mailmare. In the past, Derpy had been very prone to miss-reading packages and letters, delivering mail to the wrong ponies, and just overall, getting lost during the process. However, thanks to her new eyes and improved vision, that was all a thing of the past.

Derpy’s boss, Special Delivery, was sitting behind his desk at the Ponyville Post Office. He took another sip of his coffee, as he read another article in a copy of the morning newspaper, of which he had sent another pony to deliver to the ponies of Ponyville earlier in the day. The article was about a strange blue box, which had been appearing in Ponyville for quite some time, but no pony knew much about it. Just as he was about to finish reading the article, Derpy came trotting through the front door, and started to set her mail satchel on one of the hooks on the wall.

“Well well well. This makes the third day in a row that you’ve gone out to deliver the mail, and gotten back before lunch. I gotta say, I’m really impressed at your improved performance Derpy.”

Derpy held her head up high, as she responded to her boss.

“Thanks a lot Mr. Delivery!”

Special Delivery then set his paper on his desk, before reaching into one of the drawers to retrieve something.

“And it’s not just me that’s impressed.” He set large stack of papers on his desk. “Ponies from all over Ponyville have been sending in feedback letters, all saying how grateful they are that their mail has been getting to them on time, and in one piece.”

“Wow! That’s really great sir!” Derpy replied ecstatically.

Special Delivery then put a grin on his face, as he pulled out one more letter from his desk.

“However, you’ve still gotten one complaint letter.”

Derpy was shocked, and became nervous as she spoke.

“Oh no! What did I do wrong?”

Still grinning, Derpy’s boss opened the letter, and read it aloud.

“’I am grateful that my mail has once again gotten to me safely, but I still feel that I have a complaint.” He squinted his eyes at Derpy, before reading the last bit of the letter. “I complain that the mailmare didn’t stick around long enough, for me to say hello, and thank her for doing such a wonderful job!”

Derpy’s face immediately lit up, as her boss let out a laugh.

“Ha ha! You haven’t received one complaint so far this week Derpy. All the ponies couldn’t be happier with your performance, and neither can I.” He then stood up from his desk. “And that’s why, starting today, I’m giving you a raise, and promoting you to senior mail pony!”

Derpy jumped for joy.

“Oh, thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you! I don’t know what to say, I’m so happy!”

Special Delivery sat back down in his chair.

“You don’t have to say anything Derpy. In fact, why don’t you take the rest of the day off? You’ve earned it.”

“Oh, thank you so much sir!” Derpy replied. She then turned around and made her way out of the post office.

/)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\

Derpy made her way through the streets of Ponyville, as she headed to Sugarcube Corner for a celebration muffin. However, about halfway down the street to the bakery, Derpy once again closed her eyes for a second, and managed to trip over her own hoof again.

“Owie. Is this going to keep happening every time I close my eyes? I probably should have just flown there.” She began to stand back up, and was almost on her hooves, when she began to her the sound of camera shots all around her.

Photo Finish, and her crew of fashion ponies, had set up large lights and cameras around Derpy, taking several different angled shots.

“Yes YES! Zats it! Zat style. Zat pose. Ah, zis is going to be und amazing vhoto shoot!” Photo Finish said aloud.

While the flashes of the cameras weren’t hurting her eyes as much this time, Derpy still tried to hold a hoof in front of her eyes, to block the lights.

“What, what’s going on?”

“Vhy, I told you zat I vould veturn! I, Photo Finish, know und picture perfect pony, vhen I zee von. You vust be my front model at my fashion show zis veek!”

Derpy tried to back out of the circle of cameras, but the ponies around her just leaned in closer. Photo Finish then jumped into the center of the cameras with Derpy, and wrapped a hoof around her neck.

“I can vake you und shooting star! All of Equestria will know your face, and ponies from near und far, will all love you!”

Derpy began to disagree, and turn Photo Finish away, but something about what she said about all the ponies loving her, made her start to second guess herself. While it’s true that she didn’t really care what ponies thought of her before, back when her eyes were what they used to be, and she was more awkward. The idea of her being loved by all of the ponies that used to make fun of her, made Derpy start to consider the pony’s offer.

“I…I could really have everypony love me?”

“Yes, yes my dear! Zay vill all love you!” Photo Finish replied.

“What…what would I have to do?” Derpy asked the still excited fashion pony.

“Not a zing my dear! I zhall handle everyzing, und all you’ll have to do, is just be vantastic!”

Derpy began to think that it all sounded too good to be true, but then again, she thought that she would ever have another opportunity like this again.

“I…won’t have to do anything, huh?”

/)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\

The familiar sound of the TARDIS reappearing began to echo in the Hooves household. Soon, the blue police box appeared in the kitchen, and The Doctor came rushing out, slamming the door shut behind him. He was out of breath, as he spoke aloud to himself.

“Pant. Pant. Gah, those Cybermen, err, uh, Cyberponies, really have no sense of humor at all! Pant. Pant. Even the Daleks could tell a decent joke every once in a while. Pant. Pant.” The Doctor started to catch his breath, until he finally noticed Dinky sitting at the kitchen table, seemingly unfazed by his sudden appearance in the TARDIS, quietly working on her homework. “Ah, hello there Dinky, how was your day at school?”

Without even looking up from her homework, Dinky answered her father.

“Oh, it was good daddy. We started doing rehearsals for the play in a few days, and Ms. Cheerilee asked us to write a paper about who we’ll be playing in the play, and what they did during the founding of Ponyville.”

“Ah, well that sounds interesting. Still no fire breathing dragon I suppose.” The Doctor responded to his daughter, mumbling the last part to himself. “Say, have you seen your mother around Dinky? I could really use a hand, err, hoof with something.”

“Oh, she’s at her photo shoot daddy.” Dinky replied.

The Doctor nodded in agreement.

“Ah yes, right, her photo shoot. Guess I’ll have to…” Something then clicked in The Doctor’s head, as he realized what Dinky had just told him. “Wait, what photo shoot!?”

Dinky finally looked up from her homework, answering her father.

“Oh yeah, you were gone on your trip when she came back and told Sparkler and me. Mommy got picked to be a model pony for a fashion show this week, and she’s been out at the fashion store all night.”

“M.m.m.model!” The Doctor stuttered out. “A model for what?” He let out a gasp, as he formed a conclusion in his head. “Oh no! That pony with the camera from the other day. She must have come back for Derpy and recruited her to be a model for…” A shock came upon The Doctor’s face, before he started running past Dinky, and made his way out of the house. “I’ve got to stop her from becoming a pear model!”

Meanwhile, Dinky returned to her homework, as Sparkler walked into the kitchen.

“What’s got dad all wound up?” She then stopped in her tracks, before putting a hoof to her face. “Ugh…dad parked the TARDIS here again!”

/)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\

A few more days passed, and it was finally the night of Photo Finish’s fashion show.

Derpy peeked her head out from behind the curtain, and saw that the entire room of the Carousel Boutique was packed. She was nervous to say the least, and the uncomfortable dress that had been made for her wasn’t helping much. The past couple days had been stressful, with her working at her job during the day, and then doing photo shoots with Photo Finish here at the Boutique at night. There was also the pestering from The Doctor, about how she seemed to be getting swept into the limelight, when normally she’d never do something like this.

Suddenly, Photo Finish walked up behind Derpy, and nearly made her jump out onto the stage.

“Are you veady my dear? Zee show vill be starting soon, and soon, everypony vill know und love you!”

“Uhh, ye, yeah. I’m just…uh…a little nervous is all.” Derpy replied.

“Have no vear my dear. Just valk out onto zat stage, strike und magnivicent pose, und bask in zee light and applause of zee crowd. You shall ve und shooting star!” Photo Finish told her model.

Derpy nervously chuckled to herself, as she looked back to the curtain.

/)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\


The Doctor and Sparkler found their seats in the audience of the town hall. Tonight was the night of Dinky’s play, and they wanted to make sure that they had good seats to see her play Princess Celestia.

There was still a little time before the play was supposed to start, so Dinky ran from backstage, down the aisles of the audience, and over to where her father and sister were sitting. She was already wearing her costume, which consisted of a white gown, little yellow shoes, and a pair of fake wings strapped to her back. It almost looked like the wings were flapping as she ran up to her family.

“Hi daddy! Hi Sparkler! Are you two excited!?”

The Doctor gave a sincere smile, as he looked down at his adorable little daughter.

“Oh we can’t wait for it to start sweetie. We know you’ll do just fine.”

Sparkler nodded in agreement.

“I’m still so jealous that you get to play the Princess, Dinky.”

Dinky giggled at her sister, until she noticed something that made her frown. She looked around the audience, but didn’t see her mother anywhere.

“Daddy, where’s mommy?”

The Doctor turned to look at the empty seat between him and Sparkler, which they were saving for Derpy, when she arrived. He then turned back to Dinky, now starting to look a little sad, so he put on as best a smile as he could, to make her feel better.

“She’s just running a little late Dinky, but I’m sure she’ll be here in time to see you on stage.”

Her eyes still seemed down, but Dinky put on a little smile and nodded at her father.

“Okay daddy. I’ll look for mommy from my tower perch while I’m performing.” With that, she turned, and ran back down the aisle, to get backstage once again.

The Doctor waved his hoof as Dinky ran to the stage, and he couldn’t help but feel guilt in his stomach, as he looked back at the empty seat next to him.

“Come on Derpy, you can’t let our little filly down.” He thought to himself.

/)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\

The curtains opened, and Derpy walked out on stage. All the ponies in the audience “ooh’d” and “ahh’d”, as Derpy walked down the runway, purposely tripping herself at the end, in order to get the pose that Photo Finish wanted her to have. As she lifted herself into the pose, the crowd went crazy, stomping their hooves repeatedly on the ground.

/)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\

At the same time,

The curtains to the school play opened, and there atop the scenery made castle tower, stood Dinky. She pointed out into the open landscape painted behind her, and spoke.

“I declare, that this stretch of land, shall be known as: Ponyville!”

The crowd stomped their hooves for joy, and Dinky took the opportunity to look out into the crowd. She could see everypony stomping, and even spied her sister stomping as well, while her father sat in his chair and clapped his hooves together. Dinky smiled even wider, until she took a closer look into the audience. There between her father, and sister, was an empty chair.

/)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\

The curtains closed behind Derpy, as she finally got backstage again. She let out a deep breath, relieved to finally be done with the fashion show. Photo Finish stomped her hooves on the ground, as Derpy walked over to her.

“Wunderbar! Wunderbar! You vere amazing my dear! Zee entire crowd loved you!”

Derpy rubbed the back of her leg with her hoof, a little embarrassed.

“Heh heh. Gee, thanks Ms. Finish.”

“Abzolutely spectacular! Vhy, zis could be und photo shoot worthy of zee Princess!” Photo Finish exclaimed.

“Wow, really? The Princess? Heh, heh.” Derpy told the mare. She ran the sentence through her head again, when she realized something. Something that shocked her to her core. “The…Princess? The Princess! Dinky! Oh, my gosh! I’m missing her play!” Derpy zipped past Photo Finish, spinning her in place, and almost causing her glasses to fall off.

“Vait! Vhere are you going!?” The stunned fashion photographer tried to call after Derpy.

/)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\ /)(\

“Oh, please don’t let me be late. Please don’t let me be late. Please don’t let me be late.” Derpy thought to herself as she ran. Her dress was starting to get ruffled and fall apart as she ran, and she almost tripped over it. She would’ve just flown, but the style of the dress prevented her from moving her wings necessary to fly.

She could see the town hall up in the distance, even this late at night. As she got closer, the front doors began to open, and Derpy began to think that she was going to make it. At least, until ponies started making their way out. Derpy saw all the families leave with their respective filly from the play, but she didn’t see her family anywhere. She rushed past the last family to leave, and inside the town hall. There, she saw a sight, one that made her heart sink in her chest. At the edge of the stage, surrounded by The Doctor and Sparkler trying to comfort her, was Dinky…crying.

Derpy walked down the aisle, closer to the three of them. She got a few chair aisles away from the stage, when Dinky looked up, and saw her mother. She immediately hopped out of her father and sister’s hooves, and off the stage. She ran towards Derpy, but instead of running into her hooves, she ran past her mother, and kept on running, all the while still crying.

Tears began to form in her eyes, as Derpy turned her shocked face from her little filly running away, back to her husband and daughter standing on the stage. The two of them just looked down at her from the top of the stage, emotionless. They then walked off, stage right, down the stairs, and made their way to the entrance, leaving Derpy standing in the middle of the now empty room, alone.

Derpy collapsed to her knees, the tears in her eyes now falling, as she brought her hooves to her eyes to try and stop them. She began to cry to herself, for what felt like an eternity.

“Dear Celestia…what have I done?”