• Member Since 31st Dec, 2013
  • offline last seen Jul 2nd, 2017

Crystal Bombshell


I'm just your average brony... Who happens to be transgender (MTF) and lesbian... So yeah. I do write, and I love editing! If you need an editor, just drop me a message!

E

When Rainbow Dash is heading to Golden Oaks Library to tell Twilight something really important to her. She hopes it's going to turn out well.

My first story (or anything) that I've written recreationally (outside of school). So please feel free to give me constructive criticism and point out any errors/mistakes/etc in the story. If you want to know a little more about me, then refer to this blog post

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 8 )

Thanks to everyone who favorited the story today! You guys made my day worthwhile! :twilightsmile: :rainbowdetermined2:

Seems a little rushed but the underlying story is good; however, I haven't liked, favorited or subscribed and I am not necessarily going to do it in that order.

Reminded me of the Hearts and Hooves SFM on youtube. Cute and fairly well put together. I'd like to read more stories like this, if you've got the inspiration.

Cute premise, but it's pretty much over as soon as it begins. Very little actually happens, and there's no meaningful character development.

Also, you don't need an apostrophe on Twi. I know it's a truncation of Twilight, but tacking on an apostrophe just makes it look silly.

4066530 Sorry about the earlier comment, I was stuck in school, in the middle of a lecture. I completely agree, but it was a timed writing project of mine, just to test my abilities.

it was rushed, and twi was an idiot in it when healing rainbow dash, the spell quickened the healing prose's but it did not set the bones, meening that dash could possibly be crippled, it's only a small fact, but twi would know it, it's good for for a first time thing but you should have spent more time on it, quality over how fast it get's out. so my advice to you would be to spend more time on your work and read through it, or get pre-readers to, to make sure it flows nicely.

“Dash?” she asked, concerned.
“Twi?” Dash asked, seemingly uncomprehendingly.

Should have put that backwards. XD
Very rushed btw but still a nice story for your first one.

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