Chapter 17: A Wild Character Appears
Don't kill, don't kill, don't kill, don't kill, don't kill, kill, kill, kill...
"Woah! You just made a one-eighty degree turn, way off track there!"
Huh wha-yeah. I can't seem to process anything right. Feels like my mind is all cloudy.
"Same here. Let's see what Knightmare does."
Knightmare was calm, cool, and focused. The pony in the distance was closing in. In a matter of two minutes Knightmare could see it was a pegasus mare approaching from the distance. She had a lavender coat, hey mane was indigo with orange stripes and wore a peach colored bow. Her tail had the same colors as her mane.
Ohmygawdohmygawdohmygawdohmygawd!
"Keep it together man!"
Knightmare was now right in front of the mare. "Oh why hello there." The mare smiled, not knowing what was to come. "Why hello there, I'm...Kriece."
Bullshit more like it.
The mare reached out her hoof to shake. "Name's Rave but most of my friends call me Ravy."
If you aren't to like make out or something just leave damn it!
"Well then Ravy would you like to make out?" Rave simply arched her eyebrow. "Hmmm sure why not." Knightmare and Rave began to kiss. Knightmare broke the kiss and looked at Rave as she slumped to the ground. "Ah much better. Lucky I did not need all of your life force."
What the hell did you do? Is she still alive?
"Why do I feel much better than I did?"
*I SIMPLY JUST TOOK THIRTY-THREE PERCENT OF HER LIFE FORCE TO REJUVENATE THE BODY. SHE KNOCKED OUT. PITY, SHE WAS VERY SKILLED AT KISSING.
Uh I don't know how to feel about a mare in a stallion's body making out with another mare.
"My body was not ready."
Knightmare raised Rave's body and laid it on the grass next to the road, taking her bitpurse as well.
Wow and you stole her money.
"That's pretty hardcore."
*YES, WELL WE ARE NEARING A TOWN AND NEED AN INN TO REST AT.
And what about her? Like she isn't going to look for us at the town.
*WE WILL BE GONE BEFORE SHE EVEN WAKES UP.
You can't just leave her like that!
* WHY NOT? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HER.
Just take off my jacket and lay it over her.
*FINE. THERE ARE YOU PLEASED?
Yes...
"NO!"
*WHY IS THAT?
Can't you just like bring her with us to the inn? I still don't want her out here.
*I WILL NOT BRING HER WITH US.
Do it or I'll freaking do things again.
*GAH! FINE I WILL TAKE THE MARE TO THE INN WITH US.
Much better, now HI-HO-SILVER!
"That'll be seventy-six bits." Knightmare taken aback by the price. "I remember it being only twenty!" The stallion at the desk simply stared. "That's more absurd than you walking in with a passed out mare and getting a room for the night." Knightmare took out the bits and gave them to the cashier. "Here is your key to the room, the number is twenty-three."
OH. MY. GAWD.
*WHAT IS IT NOW?
Twenty-three!
*WHAT ABOUT IT?
Do you know that you can pretty much get twenty-three from almost anything, you just got to be creative.
*I HIGHLY DOUBT THAT.
I can prove it to you. Think of anything, something and I'll get twenty-three out of it.
*TWENTY-THREE.
I see what you did there.
*IM GOING TO REGRET THIS.
What are you going to regret?
*I MUST TAKE A SHOWER.
Oh kay then, good luck with that. I'll be over here minding my own business.
*I WOULD HAVE THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO BE IMMATURE ABOUT THE WHOLE THING.
Pfft as if watching a guy take a shower would appeal to me.
*YOU HAVE A POINT. I'LL MAKE IT QUICK.
Knightmare entered the room and laid the mare on the single bed that was there and went to to the bathroom to freshen up.
Where are we even going?
*WE ARE GOING TO MEET AN OLD FRIEND OF MINE.
You have friends?
*MORE ACQUAINTANCE THAN FRIEND.
Knew it.
"And why are you going to see this acquaintance of yours?"
*YOU WILL SEE WHEN WE GET THERE.
Uhg fine. You and your secrets I swear.
*AND WHAT ABOUT YOUR SECRETS? IF I REMEMBER CORRECTLY YOU KNEW WHAT I WAS BEFORE ANYPONY HAD.
Now that is one thing that will stay with me until I die no matter what.
*WHY?
For the sanity of us all. Even I try to ignore it.
*YOU HAVE NO SANITY LEFT.
Oh I do, though not much. I'm borderline schizophrenic. Let me out of my body and I'll show you how crazy I really am.
*I WILL SLEEP ON THAT.
Knightmare had finished drying after taking a shower. "How do these mortals get tired so easily? How infuriating. Now I have to sleep on a bed next to this mare because I'm too afraid of some...horrifying images that will never leave me." Knightmare scooted the mare more to the side of the bed to get into a more comfortable position and slept.
"Hey."
"Hey."
"HEY."
"HEY!"
Knightmare bolted upright to be confronted by the pegasus mare. "What is it mare." Knightmare was dizzy from the sudden movement. "That's Rave to you Kriece." Knightmare rolled her eyes, Knightmare had no time to deal with this. "Rave, there you happy?" Rave smiled and suddenly took on an angry look. "Why the hay am I in a inn with you?"
Be nice to her or I'll do stuff.
Knightmare rolled her eyes again. "You passed out and I brought you here. Do not worry I did nothing." Satisfied with the answer Rave took on a more happy look. "Hey where's my bitpurse?!" Knightmare grabbed the bitpurse from the cabinet and tossed it to her. "Where's all my bits?! I had seventy-six bits!" Knightmare had no idea why she was still lingering around. "I used them to pay for the room." Rave walked over to Knightmare and slapped Knightmare in the face. "WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!" Rave rubbed her hoof. "Ow! that hurt more than I thought it was going to. You owe me seventy-six bits." Knightmare paid no attention and walked out the room, Rave running after. "Hey! Didn't you hear me? You owe me seventy-six bits." Knightmare exited the inn and took a road leading straight into the nearby forest. "Hey wait up!" Knightmare looked back at Rave. "Why are you following me? I do not have your money." Knightmare then continued to walk. "Well if you don't have my seventy-six bits I guess I just have to follow you until you do." Rave ran up to the side of Knightmare to keep pace. "I cannot have you follow me it's dangerous, don't you have somewhere to be?" Rave stopped and looked at the ground with a sad expression and immediately ran back to the side of Knightmare. "No...I don't have anywhere to be. Im still going to follow you."
*WHAT AN INSUFFERABLE MARE.
You brought this upon yourself. Deal with it.
"Why are we heading towards Snowcap Mountain?" Knightmare wasn't prepared to be stuck with two idiots, one was bad enough but two was over doing it. "Hey I asked a question! Answer me! Stop ignoring me. You there? hello, anypony home?"
Oh she's a talker, nice.
*WHY ME?!
________________________________________________________
Chapter 17 to annoy the hell out of you.
Yeah sorry for the wait people blame it on the holidays and stuff. I was intending to write about the princesses and stuff but I decided for that to be its own chapter and that won't be until next year *GASP*
And introducing Rave the potential love interest I think! And the mention of Knightmare's mystery "friend"! Ooo aaahhh so mysterious.
Anyways Comment, Rate, Eat, Sleep, Drink Diet Coke
Not DIET coke!
And then I said diet coke? Are you crazy?!?!?!
77946
78009
Somehow i knew that would spark controversy
hmmm what does ill do stuff mean
Actually I prefer regular. And I have enough coke with me to give me a few new kidney stones.
Great chapter as always!
Actually I prefer regular. And I have enough coke with me to give me a few new kidney stones.
Great chapter as always!
78083
stuff..bad stuff, mean stuff, horrible stuff alongside ew stuff, which by default, must come with traumatizing stuff. Alledgedly
78113
Why you guys gotta hate on diet coke? if anything diet Pepsi is just as horrible
No sugar?!?!?! Give me a break! I'm not drinking any kind of artificial sweetener!
78215
What about the one with Splenda? Ah who am I kidding diet anything sucks, WHERE MY TEA AT?! HOLD MAH DRANK BEYOTCH!
78331 Tea? I prefer coffee, but ok. Also, pepsi IS pretty bad.
78479
I never got into coffee, I was more of a relaxing type of child, green tea, black tea, red, white, et cetera! I used to pay $59 a month for special tea from a tea specialist store called Teavanna. Then I stopped cause my parents didn't feel it nessasary to pay that much money for tea...pfft.
And Pepsi, for when there's no Coke!
78331, diet soda as, a general rule, usually tastes horrible. Kind-of like frozen dinners!
I never got into drinking coffee either.
I forgot: Good chapter. Is the "aquaintence" Knightmare's a dragon?
79221
HOW THE HEL-maybe
how'd you figure? Vi tu san rom? lulz are you sure you aren't gypsy as well
i take my diet sodas as is to balance out my mountain dew. also if you're gonna go so far as show Grimdark,war, rape and all this other stuff to "K"nightmare i want you add "Two mares one cup" as well.
86229
why stop there?
I could do a pony version of the whole lolshock.com website
then again even I have limits...which just so happens to be Encyclopedia Dramatica's Offended page