Chapter 1: What's yer name?
The last thing I expected to see was a naked girl lying on my back porch. In fact, the sight caught me so off guard that I just stood there a whole minute, staring, not sure what to do. When I finally realized what I was doing, I set my groceries on the ground and unlocked the door to the house. Half-dazed, I found my bathrobe and ran back outside. She was still lying there, naked as can be. Blushing profusely, I draped the bathrobe over her body, covering her up. Now that she was decent, I could do what I, in retrospect, logically should have done first, as it makes more sense.
"Shit, 're you okay?" I asked the girl, concerned. I got on my knees and gave her shoulder a firm nudge with my hand. She stirred a bit, and I sighed in relief. Now that I knew for sure that she wasn't dead, I slipped my hand under her head, lifting it slightly to give her some support.
I shook her shoulder a bit more forcefully this time. "Hey. Hey, come on. C'mon. You okay?"
Her sky-blue eyes fluttered open, and she let out a small gasp when she saw me. In an instant, her eyes transformed from bright and beautiful to panicked and fearful. Judging from the way she scrambled backward, trying to get away from me, she looked desperate. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little hurt by that.
"I'm sorry," she cried. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Please don't hurt me." She was already beginning to tear up.
"Hurt you? Why the hell would-? And...and what're you sorry for? I-" I took a deep breath. Whatever had happened to this girl had clearly affected her. I needed to set aside my confusion and calm her down. "It's fine. It's okay. Ah'm not gonna hurt you. 're you all right? Can I help you?"
The girl continued to stare at me, eyes wide with fear. "Wh-what," she managed to squeak out. "What are you?"
I thought this situation couldn't get any more confusing. I was wrong. "The hell're you talkin' about?"
"You!" she cried. "Wh-what kind of creature are you?"
I just stared at this girl, dumbfounded. "I...are...I...I just...I...uh...............WHAT?! The fuck are...'re you fuckin' serious?!"
She began to cry. "P-please, don't swear at m-me," she said, hiding behind her hair. Actually, this was the first time I noticed her hair. Surprising, really, because it came down to nearly the middle of her back and was a bright, light pink. It didn't look like any kind of hair dye I'd seen girls at my school use. How did she make it look so...natural?
"I just...I..." I sighed. "I'm sorry, 'kay? It's jus', I think you might've...forgotten some things."
She stopped crying, but continued to look at me inquisitively. "Wh-what do you mean?"
"Well," I said. "Ya don' seem to know what I am, that was kind of a giveaway."
"B-but," she stuttered. "I've never seen anything like you before."
I sucked in breath through my teeth. "Yeah, amnesia, I guess." Poor girl. She doesn't seem to know a thing. I'd better be easier on her. "Here, jus', just come in, you can get dressed, and we'll sort things out, akay?"
My offer fell on deaf ears. As I was speaking, the girl was looking at her hands as though she'd never seen them before in her life. Her eyes went wide with terror. A soft, but high-pitched scream escaped her lips, then she passed out on the spot.
I stood there, trying to comprehend what had just happened. A full minute passed before I said anything.
"Fuckin', Christ," I said under my breath. I had the feeling it was going to be a long day.
I was sitting on the couch in my living room, staring at the piano, not doing anything. After what happened, how could I? All I could do was think about everything that had happened in the last half-hour. I was driving home from grocery shopping for the week. When I got home, I was carrying two bags as I made my way from my car, a piece-of-shit '93 Toyota Celica, to the back door of the house. I stepped onto the back porch when I saw the naked girl lying off to the side. I went inside and grabbed my bathrobe to cover her up, went back to her, covered her up, and woke her. Neither of us had any idea what was going on. She saw her hand and passed out. I picked her up and carried her into my parents' bedroom, where I put her under the covers and drew the curtains. Then I remembered my groceries, got them out of the car, and put them in the refrigerator. Now, here I am, sitting on the couch, not doing a thing. I thought about pulling out my laptop and playing a game to take my mind off things, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I didn't care about setting a new fastest speed run. All I wanted was to wait for the mysterious girl to wake up.
Speak of the devil. At that moment, I heard soft weeping coming from my parents' room. I stood up and opened the door. The girl was sitting up in bed, tears streaming down her face. As she turned toward me, I averted my gaze. I wasn't trying to be rude, but, well, the way she was sitting, the blanket didn't cover her chest.
"Um," I mumbled. "Could you, uh, cover yourself?" My face was flushed. After a moment of no response, I snuck a peek, just to see if she did what I asked. To my surprise, she did her job a little too well. The girl had hidden herself completely under the covers. I stifled a chuckle and made my way to the side of the bed. "You don' hafta cover yer head."
The girl slowly poked her head out from under the covers. The slight grin that was on my face fell when I saw her puffy, bloodshot eyes and was replaced with genuine concern. I got on the bed and sat Indian-style, facing her. "What's wrong? Please, tell me."
"What...what am I?" she whispered, pointing to the other side of the room. I turned in the direction she was pointing and saw the massive, nearly wall-size mirror positioned above my parents' dresser. "What are we?"
So it's true. She really had no idea. I let out a small sigh as I prepared for what would surely be a long discussion. "Were called humans," I began. "We, um...uh...I...hmm..." I glanced around the room. "Y'know...I don' actually know how ta describe us." But as I looked around the room, an answer came to me. One that could summarize the entire history of the human race in a single sentence.
"We're pretty smart, I guess..."
The girl stared at me inquisitively. Not that I blame her. As far as explanations go, that wasn't exactly top-notch. "A-are you...dangerous?" she asked.
I sucked in a breath. This question caught me off guard. I knew what the "right" answer was, but I found myself having a difficult time saying it. What was wrong with me? This girl woke up with amnesia and needs to relearn what humans are, and I'm considering telling her that we're dangerous? God, I'm stupid sometimes.
"N-no. Humans aren' dangerous. Sure, we may not always be that friendly all th' time, but we wouldn' hurt you."
The girl seemed to relax a little, although she still looked distressed. "So, then, c-could you please not...swear like that?" she pleaded. Then, in a much softer voice, "please?"
I smiled gently. "Yeah, ah'm sorry 'bout that. I shouldn've lost it like that. 't's actually a bad habit'a mine, I really needa stop."
I leaned in closer. "Look, I dunno what's goin' on with you, 'n' you don' seemda know yerself, but ah'm sorry we got off to a bad start. So, let's start over. My name's Dante. What's yers?"
The girl smiled for the first time that day. "Fluttershy. I'm Fluttershy."
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It's fun trying to formulate whatever accent this guy has in my head.
I like it.
Please, continue.
I like it and I want read more. Please sir, I want some more chapters. Sorry I just had to do an Oliver Twist joke
Self insert and the first line is: "The last thing I expected to see was a naked girl lying on my back porch."
picgifs.com/reaction-gifs/reaction-gifs/abandon-thread-fuck-this-shit/picgifs-abandon-thread-fuck-this-shit-1670011.gif
On the plus side the layout is decent and I always approve of that. Now back to the downside, don't base a character entirely off yourself, it almost never works. Take aspects of yourself and use that. I could be a lot meaner but I really don't want to be that guy.
I like this srory so far, the self insert isn't bad dispite what some ponies may believe, as long as you can pull it off you'll be fine.
I'll be lookin for the next update...
4066528
4066127
Thanks for the feedback.
4066568 NO!...Thank you for ackowledging my existence!
Mmhh, anything about human fluttershy i'l read it :D.
4066585 Anything about Fluttershy I'll read. Anthro, pony, evil (I have plans.... Fluttershy can be a real bloodsucker....).
Yeah... im from wisconsin, you sound like youre from minnesota or michigan.
4066643 hehehe lol, okay, give it your best shot, bro :P
4066643 i'll rape her if I have to, i'l read anything of fluttershy, sex gore anthro human sexuality her with a dick and etc...
Dude,good first chapter :D
4066728
Please. Never say words like that again....
4066958 okay hehehe... was that a joke? Or was it seriously? The truth man
Another one of these types of stories, huh? Arright; let's see where this goes!
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4066982
........ Yes
4066728 I guess most of us would. XD
Very interesting .Write on, develop more chapters. You have peaked my curiosity. Good job so far. I wonder what will happen...
4070289 Originality? Heh, you give me too much credit. But thank you, though.
You had my interest, and you now have my attention. Can't wait to see where this goes
He's probably not gonna believe her name us Fluttershy, considering actual people don't have names like that. XD
This is gonna be delicious... and first of, She reminds me of Tsumugi Kotobuki from K-ON
4067622 lol most of us XD
4071101
There are people named things as stupid as Hashtag. Are you sure about that?
4071101 Then he Googles Fluttershy.
4070289
actually, it's a whole genre, "Pony on Earth" abbreviated PoE, usually.
There's even a fimfic group about it
4070369 Like the story thus far and also that your protagonist knows nothing of MLP:FiM--don't know why but I never seem to like those fanfics for some reason.
Keep up the good work, and I hope to read more soon!
Love it! Keep up the good work, and like fluttershy said, try to not swear so much... It really gets on my nerves when very other word is a swear...
4073298
That's my name irl
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I love this question. It's very Fluttershy-like and utterly wrong at the same time. Everyone is dangerous. It all depends on how far we are pushed. That includes Shy, as well. When the need to protect her friends overweights her shyness, nothing can stop her.
The correct question would be "Are you a threat?", I suppose. That's what I would ask. But hey, I'm not Fluttershy, nor am I close to having her kind of personality.
FAVORITE!
I NEED MORRRREREEEEE
A favorite and a follow for you, good sir. I hope to read the future chapters to this because, well...
It seems absolutely adorable.
~Golden
A great start. I read and favourited this morning, but was rushed for college. So yeah, like I said, good start. Can't wait for more
I like the concept but...I HATE SEXUAL AND 18+ CONTENT!!
4083336
Theeeeen don't read stories that have it, and also try to avoid the internet. Besides, the story hasn't even done that yet. Nudity isn't sexual content.
4083336
static.fjcdn.com/pictures/Welcome+to+the+Internet.+thumb+up+or+down+and+make_36920e_3646755.jpg
MOOORRREEE!!!!NOOOOWWWW!!!!
HELLO MY FELLOW MIDWESTERN!
Hmm... I think you might be giving the standard HiE "What's a human" speech, without considering the context.
What you wrote: "Were bipedal, sapient, capable of speech, and have amazing technology."
What's wrong with it: Bipedal, sapient, and capable of speech are all self evident, from the fact that he walked into the room and spoke to her. Also, why mention "amazing technology" to someone you assume has amnesia?
Here's a way you could replace it, to seem less out of place: "We're humans... Related to apes, they say."
"Midwest"? I'm a Detroiter, and your protagonist seems a tad more Southern than anything else, but maybe I'm just reading it wrong.
"But now we're called humens, and we are quadruped, non-sapient and incapable of speech."
Favoriting just for that fucking quote. XD
4088030
A tad more southern? I live in Texas and have traveled all over the states as a trucker. That is one of the thickest accents I've ever seen for someone that isn't an immigrant. XD I feel like I've gone to Scotland or something.
I'm actually trying to figure out how you'd even pronounce "'re" >_>
I only learned about this Fic because it's in the favourites of somepony I've been talking to because I've written a version of their Fic that they took down because they could never get around to fixing it like everypony else wanted them to.
And though I'm not normally one for reading humans in equestria per se, I'm enjoying this. Fluttershy's reactions were right on with her character and how she'd react in such a. Senecio. Her fainting after seeing her hands did make me laugh
I look forward to the next chapter.
It also helps that reading this Fic s taking my mind of the waiting for the latest Fic I submitted to go through yet, for which I'm very grateful
I'm from the mid west and its true we do talk like that its way worse in Texas though
4066568 that reply plus that picture... priceless