- Member Since 19th Feb, 2012
- offline last seen Jun 1st, 2023
TacticalRainboom
I wrote some stories for you. I hope you enjoy them.
TacticalRainboom
Joined 19th Feb, 2012 ·
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what was this exactly for? just asking!
It's a nice story and all, but I really don't see enough of a difference from the original story material to justify the "rewrite". There's just simply not enough stuff changed in it, to the point that it dances on the razor's edge of plagiarism, whether intentional or not.
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Well, the author did put out a call for others to re-write that scene, as a kind of "see if you can do better" challenge.
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Well, if I'm having problems distinguishing between two versions of the story, I put forth the notion that in my personal way of defining a revision or rewrite, an improvement and/or difference has not been made.
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The objective (fully authorized by Jinxie, as he'll be around to confirm!) was to write something that could serve as the opening chapter to Trixie's Magic Bit. Rest assured that no toes have been stepped on. Actually, my decision to write more-or-less the same events turned out to be a really cool exercise in comparing the two of our styles as writers.
Hope you enjoyed this regardless.
Yep, this was a failed experiment, as folks seem to be confirming. I've had a lotta static over the first chapter of 'Trixie's Magic Bit' and finally I went, all right, Y'ALL write one! Hell, I'll swap it out if it's that much better than my humble efforts!
Seems that's trickier than it would appear
If you want to compare styles as writers, I don't believe for one moment it's fair to take a scene that required the light touch, and the subtlety hidden behind non-self-seriousness, that I brought it. What you should be doing is reading one of the Tactical Rainboom fics that _I_ have always adored—and I ain't volunteering to rewrite it 'cos I could not do it justice!
Equestrian Aerial Assault Unit 00
All y'all downthumbers, settle down and go read that, or Ancient Heart's First Beating. I recommend both. Ain't my fault if Tactical was certain he could write Jinxie better'n Jinxie. Tactical's whole virtue as a writer is brazen Dash-like audaciousness and total committment. Part of that is the occasional faceplant and smoking crater. I'm not in the least offended that the attempt to beat me literally at my own game (and I'm an old hand at novelin' and knew exactly what I was trying to do, even that early on, I just didn't know how far it would take me) resulted in an epic kaboom.
You seem to have got me a small pile of faves as folks compare the respective special sauces. Now go off and write another of your own fics, and I'll be turning up before you know it with yet another glorious trainwreck of a Trixieverse book
That hurts, man.
I will defend certain parts of this thing here to the death--I wanted to write 1) sappy 2) AppleDash 3) futa, and I don't think I blew THAT at least.
One way or another, this was a really fun experiment, partially an exercise and partially an act of worship. At one point I knew that this was turning into me writing some clop instead of me writing something that would successfully flow with the particular energy of Trixie's Magic Bit. I didn't fail to write your style so much as I presumed to openly mix my own style in, and in doing so I wrote something that is deceptively UNlike what it "plagiarizes."
So that's why I don't call this thing a failure (pardon ME!
) but I suppose the objectives were not met. Thanks for the read and thanks for the ride <3
I really liked this, and thought it was really good
I enjoyed that! Thanks a lot!
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I think the real problem turned out to be that rewriting just the first chapter turned out to be insufficient. We set out to de-meme it and throw in a bit of foreshadowing for future events, but it didn't mesh well with chapter two (and other later content) and we became discouraged.
The Trixieverse canon seems to have sort of evolved over time and early material doesn't always mesh 100% with the later portions, which made trying to realign just the first chapter difficult with all the foreknowledge we possess. (Not that I am faulting you, the Winningverse has the same issue, and even the Harry Potter series has incongruities between [and sometimes within] the books.)
4221140
If anypony wants to rewrite the whole series, be my guest
I mean, you would get the benefit of all my constructing of plotlines that intermesh and lead to dramatic climactic scenes that really mean something, so if you want to do that over in your own style, it's no different than supplying alternate viewpoints on 'Best Night Ever' or something. You could follow Luna's viewpoint through Rarity's Worst Day Ever and sit with her as she repents in her 'cell' at the end. Lots of possibilities
4221140
4221844
If it were me, I would foreshadow the whole polyamory business here, then have Applejack deal with it in the second and third chapters. She already gets upset when she catches Dash and Pinkie together. That's why that aspect was cut. To blow through it in two sentences like the original does felt like the author saying "oh yeah, right, polyamory, and they're okay with it." I wanted either more or less. Were I to rewrite the second chapter as well, it would have been both more and less.
That, however, would mean sustaining my decision to make things sappy for a long time into the first act of the story, and the problem here starts to reveal itself.