Chapter 1 - A New Planet
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Sonic lay on a patch of grass. It was certainly soft to the touch. The hedgehog loved to just sit and sleep on a hill, or even just rest. Sleeping was second nature to him, right behind running.
He awoke to an open sky above him. Few clouds protected the ground from the sun's light. There were several leaves flying through the air, which Sonic assumed were from a nearby tree.
He sat up to get a look at his surroundings. It was a certainly nice field he was on. Flat, soft, and only slightly bumpy from the hills and rocks.
"Nice place," he said. "But, where exactly am I? This certainly isn't Doctor Eggman's base, and most certainly isn't Mobius. I've been everywhere on Mobius, and I've never been here."
He stood to get a better view of where he was. The trees and the sky were certainly like what they were on Mobius, but they were never here before. (Wherever here was.)
"Maybe I went back to Chris's world," he thought aloud. "I haven't traveled everywhere on Earth. Too much water for my taste. Then again, wouldn't I have ended up in the city again?" He shook his head. "No. Eggman moved his base, so that would mean we would have ended up in a different place. But if this isn't close to the city, where am I?"
"Hey you!" a voice called behind him. "What the heck are you?"
Sonic turned to see a cyan... horse? What made this creature even stranger, was the fact that it had a rainbow mane. There was nothing else that could have made the noise, so he asked: "Are you the one that asked that question?"
"Yes I was," it replied. "Now what in the land of Equestria are you?"
"I'm a hedgehog."
"No your not."
Sonic flinched at that statement. "What makes you say that?"
"My friend takes care of almost every kind of animal, including hedgehogs. I've never seen a hedgehog that looks like you, or even one that could talk."
"Well, you horse. Believe to or not, but I am a hedgehog."
"I'm not a horse!" the cyan... thing said. "I am a pony! A pegasus at that!"
Upon hearing the word 'pegasus,' Sonic looked on the... pony's back to see a pair of cyan wings. "Well, I come to a world filled with talking ponies," Sonic mumbled to himself. "I really hate him sometimes. I wanted a rest from all that happened."
"Who are you talking to?" the pony asked.
"No one, now please leave me alone." Sonic began to walk off.
"Hold on! I'm not done talking to you!"
"Well I'm done listening."
"Nopony just walks out on me like that!" she screamed. Suddenly, she appeared in front of Sonic, who flinched at her sudden appearance. "Just who do you think you are, mister?!"
"I think that I am me," he replied. He walked around her. "Now if you would plea-"
She appeared in front of him again. "You are going to answer my questions!"
"And who's going to make me? You?" He walked around her once again, this time giving a small jog. He got a little further away before she came in front of him again. "Your pretty quick."
"I'm not called the fastest flyer in Equestria for nothing!" she boasted.
Equestria, huh? he thought. I'm going to have to remember that. Also, definitely not on Chris's world. "I see that you also won't leave me alone. If you stop now, I'm not going to embarrass you with that title."
"You calling for a race?"
"Is there anything else I might want to challenge?"
"What are the rules?"
"First to get to the top of the next hill over there," he pointed a finger to a slightly larger hill a little ways away, "is the winner."
"All right then," she agreed. "You ready to lose, hedgehog?"
"Don't count your chickens before they hatch," Sonic replied.
"When do we start?"
"You can start whenever you wish," he said before taking a seat.
"You're just going to sit there?"
"No, I'm going to give you a head start. I feel like you're going to need it."
"You really don't know who I am, do you?"
"What was your first hint? Now hurry and start. I'll meet you over there."
"If you really feel that confident, then I'm going!" she said before taking off. Right before she reached the hill, she turned to see where the hedgehog might be. She saw him standing at the starting line. "Are you really just going to stand there?" she called to him. "I've seen snails move faster than you!"
"Snails move faster than me?" a cocky voice behind her spoke. "I haven't heard that before."
She turned to see the blue hedgehog standing at the sop of the hill they were racing to. "How did you get up here so fast?" she asked.
"I ran," he replied. "You don't know who I am, do you?"
"No, and I want another race!" She searched her surroundings until she saw a huge mountain. "First to the top of that mountain over there wins!"
"You're on!" he accepted. "However, you won't get a head start this time!"
"Whoever said I needed it?"
"On three then?"
"3..."
"2..."
"1..."
"GO" they both screamed.
I'm almost 100% sure I've dumped on this exact same story...
3 views,5 dislikes...hmm,I conclude there is a lot of fourth wall breaking in this story
4214998 Not likely. Its probably because I wrote the prologue over a month ago and before my writing became better, in my opinion.
4214998 Wait, I'm sorry, but I only just got that joke.
4215010 I have watched sonic x so I guess I'll give this story a try and tell you if I upvote it or downvote it
Haven't I seen this before?
4214998
Views update every twenty minutes, if I recall correctly.
4215069 oh,well that makes sense.Thanks for the clear up
4215085 Sonic crossovers are comparable to FOE stories. That's all I'm going to say about it.
Lol I remember before I got into mlp I was obsessed with Sonic x though personally sonic the hedgehog (aka sonic satam) was better so curse power rangers for taking its place coz that show is s***
Hm, mixed bag of reactions here. I see a ratio of 1.57 dislikes to every one like, yet some of the comments make me believe this story is actually good. Plus add the fact that this is a Sonic X crossover, and that slightly makes sense.
For whatever reason, people on this site hate Sonic X. I can see why, slightly, but that doesn't mean it's automatically bad.
Anyways, I'll give it a read, see how you do. I saw your comment earlier stating that you originally wrote this before you, in your opinion, got better. I'll give both chapters a read, and then give you my opinion.
Hmm... not sure what to say. I actually did like the prologue. Gave me a reason to not outright hate Eggman. Even made me slightly miffed at Sonic, though I know his reasons for refusing to help Eggman. Still, new perspective to see Eggman as just someone who wanted to be accepted, but was denied that because he was different. I really liked that concept, and it gave him a bit more depth than most stories give him.
However, it did feel like you rushed a bit near the end of the prologue, and you did break the fourth wall at one point, which is a major turnoff for stories unless it's done in a comedic fashion, by a character that it would make sense with, such as Pinkie Pie.
Then I got into chapter one. It started off okay, but it devolved around the time Rainbow Dash spoke up. For one, she shouldn't have known Sonic was intelligent. If anything, she should've known he was an animal, and either ignored him, or treated him like she would treat a bunny or cat; like he was beneath her. Plus the fact that she was up in his face pretty much almost instantly, acting like a spoiled bitch, really set her way off into the depths of OOC'ness.
Overall, it was a decent start, with the story starting from an Eggman-centric POV. But it kinda distracts us and makes us think this story is going to be about Eggman, when in fact it isn't. This is just another Sonic in Equestria story, a scenario that has been done countless times before this, with most of them dying off from the author failing to come up with anything interesting to write, or devolving into a Gary Stu in Equestria story with a herd of mares falling in love with Sonic, though not before Rainbow Dash falls head over heels for him because he's fast.
I'll be honest. This story, at current point in time, deserves the rating it has. It starts off good, promises us something different than the rest of the average Sonic in Equestria stories, but ultimately is starting to fall into that same trap that so many authors find themselves falling into countless times.
I won't pass judgement on it as of now. It's too early for me to make that kind of decision. I'll follow this, and see how it goes, maybe wait another few chapters.
4216610 The part where Rainbow Dash began to spoke...
Yeah, I can understand why you say that. She should have treated him like an animal, but Sonic was talking out loud, and she heard him. That is why she talked to him.
4216662 Still can't help but feel the way she was talking just seemed way OOC for her. She likes action, not words.
4216694 Action will certainly come...
4217160 this is what I thought when you started the race
Sonic vs rainbow dash