A Tad Screwy: Screwball in Canterlot High

by Discorded SheepcityUSA

Who is Strife?

“AAARRGH! FUCK!” Screwball screamed in frustration as the arcade game let out a loud “GAME OVER” in a demonic sounding voice.

Sunset, who had been watching from next to her, facepalmed, pretty unsurprised by the twelve-year old’s reaction.

“I seriously wish you’d quit swearing.” Sunset mumbled.

“Why? I hear you use those words all the time.” Screwball asked.

“It just sounds bad coming from little kids. Just let the adults have their language.” Sunset said.

“Pfft. Yeah, that’ll happen.” Screwball scoffed, turning back to the machine, taunting her with the high score screen. She had been ten points behind the current high score, and then the fat Italian plumber decided he was gonna fall down a hole to his death.

Brilliant.

“Well there’s no way I’m gonna let that guy one-up me like that. You don’t troll Screwball. Screwball trolls YOU!” Screwball shouted at the screen, typing something into it. When she was done, the score screen read this:

High Scores

B.Mash………………………………………………..17283
Is an asshole………………………………………..17273

“Well that’s real mature.” Sunset said sarcastically.

“Oh, I’M not mature? Sorry, but who’s the one that went power crazy and tried to take over an alternate dimension just cause she lost her crown?” Screwball asked, very clearly mocking Sunset.

Sunset grinded her teeth.

“I’ve put that behind me. I was a major ass, and I’ve done my time for it.” She growled.

Screwball rolled her eyes.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night Sunny.” She said.

Suddenly, Screwball’s cell phone rang with possibly the most loud and obnoxious ringtone on Earth.

It sounded kind of like a screaming cat being shoved up a camel’s ass.

Sunset covered her ears in and groaned in agony

“Is that SERIOUSLY your phone?!” She screamed.

“Hehe. You should see this thing in action at the movie theater.” Screwball chuckled.

Screwball took her phone out of her pocket, pressed the touch-screen, and answered it.

“Yello?...Woah, whoa. Joe, calm down! You’re talking too damn fast; it’s like you’re speaking some other language…Wait he…BWahahahaha!...What, no I wasn’t laughing…Ok ok, let’s just calm the fuck down here…Wait…YOU DID WHAT?! OH YOU’RE GONNA WAKE UP TOMMOROW UNDERWATER WHEN I’M DONE WITH YA!” Screwball screamed before hanging up.

“What the heck was that about?” Sunset asked.

“Apparently Donut Joe caught Strife digging in his garbage for the fifth time this week, and he took him to the animal shelter. Well I'll tell you what, that guys' definitely on my list now, right between the egotistic cheerleader, and that freak that always calls himself "The Doctor"...the hell does that even mean?” Screwball answered.

“So what, Strife’s like your dog or something?” Sunset asked.

“Racoon” Screwball said.

Sunset pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Should’ve guessed.” She said.

“Anyway, looks like I’m gonna have to pay a visit to Fluttershit to bail him outta there. Awesome.” Screwball groaned.

Sunset scratched her chin for a moment.

“Hmm. It’s too far to walk there, so unfortunately for me, I’m gonna have to drive you. But I’m telling you right now, if you mess up my car, I’ll wring your neck! Got it?” Sunset threatened.

“Yeah sure, just as long as I get my raccoon outta pest jail.” Screwball said, waving her hand.

After Sunset and Screwball exited the arcade to retrieve Screwball’s pet raccoon, a young boy wearing a beanie similar to Screwball’s passed by the machine Screwball had recently played.

“Alright time to see if my high score’s still-“ He stopped midsentence when he saw what the screen had to offer. His score was still at the top, but what he primarily focused on is the score that followed his.

“…W-W…WAAAAAA! MOOOOOM!” he wailed, allowing Screwball to hear the last bit of his crying on her way out, causing her to smirk.

“Hehehe. Ain’t I a stinker?”

Author's Note:

Yeah, I know it's a little short, but this one is basically serving as a bridge for the next chapter, which is where we learn what caused Screwball to act like such a little prick (aside from Discord's parenting of course.)

Comments

[Unbridled Dolly]

NEXT CHAPTER!!!! : If you don't mind that is.

[Evil-Lovieness]

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.... Wait...
Screwball is only 12 years old in this thing?

She's only TWELVE years old!
And she's in high skool? Or is this one of those all grades skool?

[alarajrogers]

4107566

Since the Cutie Mark Crusaders were seen in the school library, it kind of has to be a K-12.

[Evil-Lovieness]

4107835 This is true... But it has to be a bigger skool than how it looks if the CMC are in the same building as the high schoolers.

[Moon_Dew]

4107946 Did we ever get to see how big Canterlot High is? Because I don't remember right off hand.

Also, who else can't help but give Screwball the voice (and possibly some of the mannerism) of Tiny Tina?

[Discorded SheepcityUSA]

4124566 For those who haven't played Borderlands 2, this is who I based this version of Screwball off of.

[Moon_Dew]

4124616 That explains a lot.

[Evil-Lovieness]

4124566 I think we saw some side shots.... It look big enough for a regular high school.

[ShadowLDrago]

I wonder what made Screwball such a brat, Discord may be a bit of a jerk with a twisted sense of humor, but this much?

[ShadowLDrago]

I wonder what made Screwball such a brat, Discord may be a bit of a jerk with a twisted sense of humor, but this much?

[Hairy Konquerer]

I was expecting Button Mash to say

who's the jerk that pit this!?

[No1MporXant]

Don't you think that Strife would have seemed a bit more chaotic if instead of a racoon he was a SKUNK? I mean there are people who have pet Skunks, like they have a professional remove the "Stink-Sacks" from Skunks so that they can't release their stink-spray, and a skunk just seems a bit more like a chaotic pet to me, like even without a stink-sack Screwball could place a stinky perfume/cologne or something she made on a skunk to still have it stink, and if she brought that skunk into a public area everyone would panic and run away from said skunk, then with no people around Screwball would be free to do whatever see wanted in those areas, so I think it would be more befitting to a person who spreads chaos to have a skunk for a pet instead of just a racoon.

[Matthew Stone]

High Scores

B.Mash………………………………………………..17283

Is an asshole………………………………………..17273

Ha! Diary of a Wimpy Kid reference!!

[Lord_01010000]

6390745
I think it's quite fitting for her to have a Raccoon. They're the assholes/mischief makers of the animal world to people, next to monkeys.

[Night-from-another-world]

SHE HAVE MET THE DOCTOR GEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!