The Blue Wand
Beatrix Lulamoon, or simply Trixie as everyone called her, was lying on her back and crying.
'It's not fair!' She thought.
Her trailer was destroyed, with all of her possessions, because of those two dumb kids!
She came into the Ponyville as she did in any other town where she performed her show. It was her job, she was an entertainer and she was proud of it! She visited cities, villages and even performed on some events if she was payed for it, and everything went alright, before she came into this town!
It all started as usual, she set up her trailer-stage, appeared in a cloud of smoke, maybe it was a routine, but classic always worked far better than some complex spells that can backfire two times out of three. She really liked this particular spell, it’s basically the magical equivalent of a smoke-bomb, an explosion of thick but harmless and tasteless smoke that disappeared in a matter of seconds, but created the distraction for her to mysteriously appear. The trick was in timing it right so no one would notice how she actually slipped into the smoke from behind the curtains.
Trixie always knew that the most fun came from something that you don't understand in these types of shows. The trick won't gain the same effect from the crowd if they know how it is done. She couldn't mask the glow of her horn, so she went for the alternative and performed in a wide-brimmed wizard-hat, tilting it slightly over her eyes so the horn won't be seen and to add a little of the 'friendly-weird' bit to her appearance. She knew how to act, but the eyes of the performer must be hidden, so not to betray any real emotions, the public must only see what she wanted them to see, and nothing more.
After giving one of her speeches, promising a grand show and entertainment, she launched the fireworks that were hidden all over the trailer. It wasn't actually fire per say, they weren't even warm, it was a special brand of spells that was developed during the war with the Griffon Kingdom. Originally it was a spell used as a flare that unicorns launched to display their position, create a temporary beacon in the sky or alert the allies of the current strategy. The spell was very flexible for the lack of better word, it can be used with any color, can take some simple shapes and even produce sound, even if it was the basic whistling when launched and a boom when the appointed height was reached. But even with these limitations, for her performance it was more than enough! Charge the small crystals with the spell and then trigger them from the stage with a little bit of Magic, and you get wonderful and harmless fireworks!
Next, she displayed some simple tricks that looked much more impressive than they actually were. A simple illusion of making a bouquet of fowers appear out of nowhere can affect the crowd the same way as if someone conjured a whole castle out of gold, it just needs to be properly delivered!
Then happened one of the things that really irked Trixie, someone was actually taking her show seriously! She was a performer, an actress, she was supposed to show off and brag to appear bigger than she is, it was all part of the performance! But there always was some narrow-minded individual or two, who took her words too close to heart.
Morons.
She really didn't like when someone interrupted her performance, only because they couldn't get it through their thick skulls that it was just a show! Apparently there were some very unique individuals here, because one even went to confront Trixie personally.
She used one of her old tactics and boasted that she did something impossible. Well, she said that she defeated an Ursa Major, which was actually not true, because there was no way that a Unicorn would be able to pierce through the nightmarishly high Magic resistance that the beast had.
There was apparently a baby-dragon with purple scales, yellow belly and dark green spikes on his head and tail. He also had pistachio-colored eyes. He was complaining about her lines and claims, apparently he was never in a theater and didn't understand what her job as a performer actually is about!
Something interesting actually did came out from the dragon's tirade. The Unicorn who was standing near him actually turned his lips into a zipper and sealed it shut. This actually made Trixie rise an eyebrow. It was a common knowledge that Dragons were very resistant to Magic, and even in such young age normal Unicorns would be hard-pressed to actually affect a dragon with Magic. To pull such a stunt so effortlessly... There was something wrong here and Trixie didn't like it.
The strange Unicorn was tall, taller than Trixie, slightly on the petite side, but still with some curves to show off her body. She had very light brown skin, violet eyes, navy blue hair with one violet and one rose strands, that went right through the middle of her head. On her forehead was a light grayish mulberry-colored horn. She was wearing blue jeans that didn't reach her ankles, purple and white sneakers, pink socks and light purple jumper-shirt with white sleeves and collar.
Trixie opened her senses to the surrounding Magic and almost choked. This strange Unicorn was leaking Magic even after the spell was finished! Trixie trained day and night to sharpen her sensory skill, the rare thing that only a Unicorn with iron-clad control over their Magic could achieve. The problem was that you'll have to fully stop any leakage of Magic from yourself so your senses weren't clouded by your own Magic, and you'll be able to sense others' Magic. Trixie didn't have some gigantic pool of Mana to spare, but she was sure that there wasn't any Unicorn that could boast the same level of control that she had! Not once during her performance did she lose control of her Magic or used too much or too little of it.
Trixie was above average in reserves, but that only meant that she had to train even harder to gain full control and every time she felt that her control was starting to slip, she repeated the whole course to get back what she had lost. From the constant training her reserves grew fast, and her training was becoming more and more complex to keep up with the growing pressure of her own Magic inside of her.
But this was like a personal insult! This girl just overcame a Dragon's resistance to Magic by pure power alone, without any actual skill to back it up! She wasted almost half of the Magic to break through the resistance and the other to actually perform the transformation, Trixie wanted to go over there and punch her. She knew from her scanning, that this girl was the only one more powerful than Trixie in this town, and the pathetic level of control that she had was appalling! Trixie knew this type of Unicorn, they were the ones that thought that any problem could be solved with adding more power to the spell, and brute-force their way through anything.
Trixie really hoped that this one will accept her challenge, so she could show her what real casting was, and not her plebeian 'power-over-matter'-way, even from the stage and with everyones else's Magic in the air, this one's could be felt as clear as a day, power rolling off her without any restraint whatsoever.
To discourage the dull-ones she threw a challenge into the crowd to see if any of them had guts to show their lack of brainpower on stage. Then Trixie all but called out the Unicorn with abnormal power-levels, hopping that she won't refuse in front of the crowd. She knew that in a battle of raw power there is no chance of winning against this powerhouse, but that doesn't mean that she couldn't win with her skills and far better control. No matter how much Magic you have, you will always run out eventually, and considering the display from earlier, Trixie would probably win by having far better control and more than enough Magic to spare.
Instead of the Unicorn she got an Earth-Pony cowgirl, that she tied down like a bull on the rodeo via a little application of telekinesis, a Pegasus that she spun in an illusion of a rainbow-colored tornado with the same telekinesis and another Unicorn that actually pissed her off. The damn snobbish bitch had the gall to rip off one of the curtains and then use it to create some dress while chiding Trixie for her brutish ways. Well, Trixie actually had to pull a transfiguration there, to make her a hairstyle she deserved, the arrogant bitch.
After that she finished her performance, and locked herself up in her trailer, doing her usual meditation to calm down her nerves and do all her Magical exercises before going to bed. At least she was able to get some money out of it. She will be leaving tomorrow morning, so no point preparing for a show that won't happen. Normally her training was very tiring, and left her barely able to move from the strain, but right now she decided to slack a little and go to sleep early. The damn morons ruined the mood.
She was woken up by two brats that apparently shared one brain, because they were dumb enough to lead a fucking Ursa Minor into the village! Trixie didn't know whether she needed to save the morons, or to throw them into the beast's mouth and hope the snack will be enough for it to calm down and leave! Well, she was barely able to grab the two idiots and jump away from her trailer before the gigantic bear-like monster stepped on it.
All her possessions, all her memories, all her life was destroyed before her eyes. Just like that! Because two retarded brats were dumb enough to anger a damn Ursa Minor! She was really considering just shoving the pair into the bear’s throat and hope that it will choke on their stupidity!
Oh, and they were actually proud of the fact that they doomed their own village!
She was going to throttle them after this mess was sorted out. It was pure luck that not all of her things were destroyed, more importantly her ropes survived! She didn't use these ropes in her show, because they had a very nasty enchantment on them, they suppressed Magic. When they come into physical contact with someone they start to actively suppress his or her Magic, and with an Ursa being a fully-magical being, they were like poison to it!
The problem was that she only had enough to tie them around two of the beast's legs. Normally she used these ropes to tie up the idiots that would try and rob her, so she never needed to more than two of them. Well, she knew that the ropes will take some time to work, while she casted a minor illusion over the Ursa's eyes. The misconception about the beasts' magical resistance is that they will resist all magic used on them, but that isn't true. The resistance only applies to the Magic casted directly at their body with the intention of affecting it. You can easily lift a dragon with telekinesis because its more like you're covering it with Magic and then lifting the created 'bag', while say directly changing the color of its scales will require a lot of power.
A simple illusion that didn't even touch the Ursa wouldn't be affected by its resistance to Magic, so it can work as a pair of glasses that prevented it from seeing Ponies. If it sees that there is no food here, and with the ropes basically draining its strength, the Ursa will leave without actually attacking anyone!
The only thing that she needed to do now was to make sure the the beast will leave and not fall asleep here, because transporting it will probably become problematic. And its parent could show up any moment now, and that was one thing that Trixie wanted to avoid.
But who needs logic when you have more power than the brain?! The magically-gifted Unicorn from earlier showed up, created a gust of wind that used cattails to play a lullaby, with which she soothed the creature. She levitated a water tower and filled it with milk by passing the water tower through a barn full of cows, and fed the bear with the milk. As the bear was drifting off into a deep sleep, she magically carried it back to the forest.
Trixie was gaping. They called her a showoff?! After that!? Trixie already solved the problem, it would have only took more time, but this unnecessary display of raw power with little to no actual skill... She was actually questioning if it was just a bad dream, there was just no way that someone with so little common sense could wield so much power!
And the stooges from earlier, the ones that she took down a peg during her show somehow concluded that this was not a showing off, but a moral victory over Trixie! Trixie was actually considering to check the local genealogy, with the amount of borderline inbred stupidity, the town's 'tree' should be as forked as a flagpole.
Using her favorite spell to cover herself in smoke, she created an illusion that actually made her invisible. The only negative part was that it wasn't a true invisibility, just a geostationary spot that made anything and anyone in it see-through. She listened to everything that was said about the incident, and could only gape as the two imbeciles that almost doomed their own town and started all this mess, were punished by growing mustaches! It was official, this town was doomed even without the Ursa's rampage.
Using everyone's lack of attention, she sneaked away.
Right now she was lying on the clearing in the Everfree Forest, where she collapsed after running for an hour. She was lost, she was homeless now, because her trailer was her home, she didn't have any clothes with her and the only money that she had was the one that she got from performing in that stupid town.
She cried.
All her life was destroyed because of the two dumb kids and an overgrown bear!
Suddenly she heard something. It was the sound of... metal hitting metal? Not precisely, she heard this sound before, but where? It was familiar, and she was sure that she heard not too long ago...
In Canterlot where she was restocking her supplies of food and water...
The sound of Royal Guard's plated armor.
She opened her eyes looked in the direction from where the sounds were coming.
I was actually surprised that this girl, Trixie if I hear right, was still standing. She looked like she ran a marathon and her earlier crying didn't help the case.
Suddenly she apparently came to a decision and her horn flared again. This time she created a very bright flash of light, probably in an attempt to blind me, which obviously didn't work and then sent another bolt of Magic, this time into the ground right in front of me. The explosion would've made any lesser human fly backwards, but the problem here was I wasn't human anymore.
Without pausing I charged forward, ignoring the flying dirt and grass from the explosion. Faster than the girl could she I was in front of her, making her stumble back a little, but I was able to catch a smirk on her face.
'What is she smirking about?' I thought.
Suddenly, I felt something explode right under my feet.
A mine. She created a mine with her Magecraft, and let me approach her so I would step in the blast zone. This was a pretty good tactic, and a really smart way of using Magic offensively but not directly on me. The explosion was strong enough to create a crater the size of a car and raised a lot of dirt and dust into the air.
And it didn't even put a scratch on me.
I was in my own element right now, there was only one enemy, and she was basically a Caster, while I was Saber. Her chances of victory were less than zero. Her only chance was if she will be able to teleport or pull an actual Noble Phantasm from out of nowhere.
I decided to showoff a little. I channeled my Prana and directed my concentration on a particular... skill that I was yet to use. When I felt that the knowledge finished crystallizing inside my mind and I knew how to use it, I growled out.
[Invisible Air]
Trixie was sitting with her back against the tree and looking at the gigantic crater that was created when the... creature triggered her Magical bomb she planted into the ground.
When she first saw this thing, it was like looking death in the face. This thing wasn't even a Pony, even if it looked like one. It was about the same height, with pale blond hair and unhealthy pale skin. She didn't have a horn or wings, so Trixie could guess that the... thing tried to masquerade as a female Earth-Pony. It was wearing black armor with glowing red lines over the black dress with a visor done in the same style as the armor. In its right hand was a black broadsword, with red glowing lines on it. But the most noticeable trait here was the mist surrounding the creature. It was red, black and purple with all three colors playing all over the creature’s form, not actually mixing or preventing someone from getting a good view of the thing.
When she opened her senses to find out what it was, she almost lost herself.
Such malice.
She couldn't run, her legs refused to move. She couldn't breathe, her lungs refused to take any air in. She couldn't blink, her eyelids refused to close.
Blood.
Blood.
Blood!
Blood was everywhere! It was oozing from the trees, dripping from the leafs, raining from the sky. Trixie never saw something so horrible, so evil in her entire life! The blade that the creature was holding was dripping with blood.
'Whose blood?' A whisper came from her own mind.
Was it...
Was it her blood?
"Kill..."
The hissing voice came from the blade, she was sure of it! Her eyes were locked on the thing, she could practically taste the blackened steel, it was calling for blood, it was thriving to kill. The bloodlust that was coming from the sword was insane, it was weapon that was created not to protect, not to cut, not even to kill, it was created to slaughter everything that it could reach.
She could feel the cold steel, how it pierced her chest, how it cut her heart in two.
She was... killed?
She didn't even.. see it... coming.
She was killed in the world full of blood. The blood that was raining down on her from the sky, soaking her clothes, painting the forest around her red. Even the moon, the proof of Princess's Luna power and her domain was painted crimson tonight.
Suddenly the creature took a step forward and the horrible vision vanished, leaving Trixie to collect what was left of her self-control. Without thinking, she launched a concentrated blast of Magic, one of her only battle spells. She wasn't a fighter, but that didn't mean that she couldn't protect herself when needed. This particular spell was not as powerful as the normal Magical bolt, but was far more focused and condensed, making the attack a lot more dangerous than it actually looked. If a normal blast can be considered a Magical equivalent of punch, than her version was a stab of a spear, with more piercing-potential and speed, but less raw power in it.
The attack rushed towards the enemy, Trixie was hoping that the damage done by it would be enough to at least slow it down, so she could escape.
But the projectile never reached its target, as the mist like the one shrouding the creature suddenly sprung around it, like a spheric protective barrier, shredding her attack like wet paper. The attack was strong enough to pierce Royal Guards' Armor without slowing down, and this mist stopped it without even budging!
Trixie felt fear.
Not the same pure terror that she felt during the short, strange and terrifying vision, but more in line of the fear that you feel when the last piece of hope was just drained away from your very core. Her legs were shaking, her breathing was erratic, her Magic was fluctuating wildly because of her emotional state.
'No...'
Trixie mentally slapped herself.
She wasn't going to surrender that easily! Fear, that was flooding her being suddenly vanished.
The winds roared around me, creating a tornado that instantly dispelled all dust and dirt around me. That was the power of Invisible Air, a sheath of wind that usually covered Excalibur from the prying eyes. I didn't actually form it, but rather released a much smaller version without letting it take an actual form around my blade before releasing it. The result was a powerful gale that blew away the annoying cloud that was hiding me from the girl's eyes.
Her face was priceless.
I wasn't a bad person, but even I could appreciate a good laugh at someone's slack-jaw expression. She looked like I just ate Santa's reindeer, therefore basically ruining everyone's chance to get a Christmas present.
'I never actually ate a reindeer, is it even tasty?' I wondered.
I canceled the Noble Phantasm and the wind died down instantly.
Suddenly my opponent bolted to the side, as the tree she was sitting against started to fall right where I stood. Well, this was either going to be awesome, or really embarrassing. I raised my left hand and caught the falling tree, the sharp tips of my gauntlet's fingers digging into the bark. With a strong pull I threw the whole tree behind me. The following crashing sound made turning around unneeded.
From the corner of my left eye I could see the girl trying to run away.
Utilizing Prana Burst I charged forward, almost instantly catching up with her. Apparently I was being predictable, because as soon as I came into arm-reach of her, she threw a small crystal over her shoulder, right into my face.
'Oh god, please, not a Magical Shōton-user!' I thought, while calculating my chances of being able to escape a crystal-coffin.
Luckily, the thing was nothing more than a very strange, green mix between a flash-grenade and firework. The explosion wasn't strong enough to even slow me down, but the appeared flash of green fire was actually able to startle me for a moment. The girl took the chance and darted behind the tree. Its not like I didn't know where she was, it was more in line, that I didn't trust the path to her. Not a minute ago I stepped on a mine, I really hoped that she would try something different.
'This is getting troublesome.' I almost facepalmed from even thinking that word.
Without even thinking I pulled my arm to the left and slashed at the tree, cutting it at my chest-level. It fell down, but there wasn't anyone in sight. Suddenly my Saber-Senses went into overdrive and I jumped up, barely dodging a small white ball that impacted the ground where I was standing moments ago, and exploded, creating the huge fireball.
'It's like she's a female Usopp or something...' Again I wanted to facepalm.
Twisting in mid-air I landed near the still burning ground. Instantly I had to dodge another of these small white balls, but now from a different direction. Another one almost hit me in the stomach if I didn't sidestep it, and again it came from a different direction. Soon they were flying from every direction making it really hard to actually dodge them all, the one that didn't hit me just disappeared behind the trees, and I was starting to suspect that they were launched back at me, because there wasn't any fire going beside the obvious first one.
'Why the hell am I dodging them in the first place?' I thought. 'It not like they can actually hurt me, its just fire.'
I stopped moving and instantly one of the balls impacted my side, and I was enveloped in the fire from the explosion.
'Success!' Thought Trixie.
She was honestly at the end of her rope right now. She didn't have her equipment, and attacking this thing directly didn't work. Getting even near it would be dumb because of the apparently insane strength it possessed. The damn monster tossed a whole tree like it was nothing!
Oh, she wasn't dumb enough to actually think that the monster was done for, something that could take her Magical mine and not even twitch won't die from some fire. The mine itself was a bit of a rushed experiment, an overpowered spell that created a wave of kinetic force to fight enemies with high resistance to Magic, normally it was fired in the form of a beam that worked like a blunt spear, but Trixie decided to improvise and put it in one of her last crystals and overloaded the thing as much as she could. The result was a very fragile crystal that created an explosion without actual fire or any other side-effects, just pure kinetic power.
The little white balls were actually made from paper and contained a flammable powder that that was also used in war for arsons. The more Magic you charge into the powder, the stronger the fire it will produce when in direct contact with air. The paper also wasn't as simple at it looked, it was enchanted to not let anything get inside the ball, a simple but useful spell that was mostly used in Hospital for quarantine patients.
She had only ten balls and five unused crystals with her, so she needed to make each one count. The first crystal was used for the mine, the second for the firework and all ten balls was used to catch the surprisingly agile thing. At least Trixie was able to pull almost all of the attacks without actually spending almost any Magic, the first Magical bold being an exception. Cutting down the tree was easy and her tricks didn't need too much Magic to actually work, so if the creature wants another round, she’ll have energy to spare.
The giant pillar of fire, that was rising from the spot where the creature was standing moments ago was still burning and considering that nine ball out of ten found their mark... The fire will be going for a couple of minutes, maybe less.
Suddenly something moved inside the fire.
Heavy footsteps could be heard.
'Impossible!' Thought Trixie.
Even if the creature couldn't be killed by the fire and explosions, it should have taken at least some damage! But no, it didn't even have a scratch when it emerged from the fire, its clothes weren't even slightly burned.
I was officially impressed.
Well, more like I was proven wrong about how tough Servants really are. Apparently taking nine, I counted, explosions head-on and then being engulfed in fire was even less effective than a warm breeze! The only precaution that I took was me holding my breath, I really didn't want to find out if inhaling fire can affect me.
Well, I also found out that I, apparently, could hold my breath for some impressive time.
I stepped out of the fire, looking directly at the girl. She was really good and any other person would be toast by now, but not me.
To kill a Servant you would need someone or something at least equally powerful, if not more so. I was basically on top of the food-chain, considering my impressive Parameters, and if Avalon was working full-blast I was literally indestructible, nothing less than a nuke will put me down for good, and it's only if they catch me by surprise and I wouldn't be able to activate Avalon's barrier.
It didn't actually sink until I got my face full of fire, but I wasn't exactly human anymore. Well, there was nothing I could do about it, and considering the beating I gave myself some time ago, I was still sane and logical, so I knew that I will be screwed when I show up at home as an almost immortal being of colossal destructive power.
*Clang*
My musings were interrupted as something hit my breastplate. I looked down and saw a little crystal lying near my feet.
It was glowing very light blue, almost white color.
'Oh, shit.' I thought as the crystal exploded, creating a layer of ice.
The ice enclosed my feet, immobilizing me and everything else in a five meters radius. I was really impressed with the girl's arsenal, she was reminding me of Rin with the whole crystal-bombs thing, well Rin used gems, but the basic concept is the same. It wasn't like I could ask her about it right away, she was too hostile for a peaceful dialog.
Well, I think that I will have to actually catch her.
I saw the girl moving from one hiding spot to another, and as she was almost behind the tree she threw two more crystals. One was glowing golden color, while the other white.
'Time's up, brat.' I though, as I swung my sword at the crystals.
Well, when the blade made contact with the golden crystal, there was an explosion of lightning... I actually was surprised! The bolts of lightning hit everywhere, the ground, the nearest tree, me. But, alas, it was a spell and that would mean that my Magic Resistance: A will protect me, the attack didn't even tickle.
The white crystal was more tricky, when it contacted with my sword it released a burst of wind similar to an air-bullet straight into my face. This actually made me pause, the spell itself apparently only created the wind-blast, but the hit came from a real wind, so I actually felt it! Well, it was more like a very light breeze to me, but the fact that I actually felt it was impressive on its own!
I looked at the tree behind which I knew the girl was hiding. I was tired of this game and there really wasn't anything she could actually do to hurt me, so no point of dragging this out. I raised my sword to the left, channeled Prana into it and growled.
[Burst Air]
The attack was a tad bit bigger than the last one, and the girl was lucky that I wasn't aiming at her, but above her. The crescent-shaped blast flew at an insane speed, cutting several trees including the one which the girl was hiding behind. The force of the attack was enough for the girl to stumble a little, but it was the only opening that I needed.
Before she could steady herself, I was near her and grabbed her left arm. Her head tuned with such speed that I could swear something actually snapped, her eyes were like that of a deer caught in a headlights. Well, I couldn't blame her, I am pretty intimidating.
"Now that you're incapable of escaping..." To drive the point home I clenched my hand a little, not to actually hurt, but to remind her that with the same hand I caught and threw a whole tree. "... will you please explain the reason for your hostile actions towards me?" It sounded a bit dry, but with a voice like mine...
Her eyes were as wide as dinner plates and she was starring at my mouth. She probably thought that I was incapable of speech, I wonder why?
Trixie was ready to run when something cut through the tree she was hiding behind. The spike of Magic, that she felt even without concentrating on her senses was the only warning she got before a monstrous crescent-shaped red blade of Magic teared her cover apart and continued on its path of destruction. Whatever it was, Trixie was sure that she won't be able to survive the direct hit from that thing.
When she was able to steady herself from the near-decapitation, someone grabbed her left arm.
'No...' Trixie's heart stopped.
She turned to the left and saw the pale emotionless face, with eyes hidden behind the black visor with red twisted lines on it. It had caught her, its left hand was clutching her left arm a little under the elbow. Its grip was like a vice, Trixie knew that she wouldn't be able to physically overpower it, and Magic was useless.
Is this the end?
Suddenly something happened, that Trixie didn't think was possible. It talked.
"Now that you're incapable of escaping..." Its voice was rough, hoarse even, but it wasn't what made Trixie freeze. Teeth, two sets of sharp shark-like teeth were seen each time this thing opened its mouth. They were a tad bit more narrow than that of a shark and definitely sharper. This was a predator, it caught her and now she was going to become a snack! Suddenly Trixie felt that the monster tightened the hold on her arm, as if making sure Trixie understood her position, understood that escape was impossible. "... will you please explain the reason for your hostile actions towards me?"
Trixie's mind went blank.
"... and there is also Manehattan..." Trixie was sitting in front of me and answering my questions.
Well, if you don't count the horrible puns that every damn name here had, it was like someone cut the world map to pieces and put some of them together. In shorts, this place was insane!
'And they call themselves Ponies...' I thought.
Apparently everything here had some form of Prana and could affect the world around it. I could only gape, when she told me that the local Princesses were immortal and somehow moved the sun and moon! I honestly couldn't understand how this was possible! The only thing that came to mind with the incident with the Brunestud of the Crimson Moon trying to crash the moon itself with the Earth and it being sent back by Kischur Zelretch Schweinorg with the use of Second Magic, Kaleidoscope. But then he was draining dimensions for Prana to pull that stunt! These two Princesses shouldn't be able to pull off such a feat without basically having unlimited Prana at their disposal!
'Scary thought.' Whispered the little treacherous part of my mind.
Alright, a whole population that knows about Magecraft? Yeah, I can deal with it, it’d even be a plus because I won't need to hide some things from them and questions about strange things won't raise any eyebrows in earshot.
Unicorns, such as Trixie were, more or less, the local equivalent of a Magus, but with a more naive way of thinking and a much more flexible system of Magecraft. Apparently, there was some kind of an emotional influence over someone’s Magecraft and you can actually load Prana with raw emotions. Which was kind of stupid because in some crucial moments, emotions can be in a jumble and it will leave any Unicorn helpless. Trixie only gave me the basics but I got the fact that this place was more in the jurisdiction of the Joanne Rowling, than Kinoko Nasu and Takashi Takeuchi, and that actually made me sight in relief, having even a chance of meeting someone like Merem Solomon made me feel ill.
After I made it clear to Trixie that I don't want to kill her or eat her, she was more than cooperative, although she was still glancing at me with badly hidden fear in her eyes. Well, the fact that the whole time she was talking, I was sitting on a tree lying on the ground with my sword on my knees and staring at her without moving a muscle. I wasn't doing it on purpose, it was just the flood of information left me a tad bit stunned.
I almost missed the moments that she stopped talking.
"I thank you for your assistance and for providing me with the necessary information upon my request." I said. This wasn't how I normally speak, but for the sake of keeping up the fragile peace between us going, I decided to use the formal way of speaking. "Also, I must apologize for the earlier misunderstanding and wish you safe travels." I stood up and started walking towards the road, if what Trixie told me was true.
Suddenly I stopped and turned towards the nearest set of trees.
'I can't get a break, can it?' I thought.
"Something wrong?" Asked Trixie, who was still sitting on the same spot.
"Yes." I answered, as the heavy footsteps reached Trixie's ears. "Apparently, we are being hunted."
It was the most bizarre experience in Trixie's life. The strange being that she thought was going to kill her, turned out to be a very polite traveler, who just got lost in the woods.
'There is no way her story is true...' Thought Trixie.
Yeah, she didn't believe her story, not one bit, but at least Trixie wasn't going to be slaughtered for attacking, all this mercy for just some basic information on the knight's current location. It's not like she's got a choice here, someone who could pretty much walk through a raging inferno without even a tan, was way out of her league to try and run away from.
But she was still creepy, even with her polite attitude. She just sat there, not moving like a statue and listened to Trixie without even one interruption or question. If Trixie didn't know better, she would've thought that the armored being was dead. She couldn't even hear her breathing!
'Does she even breathe?' She thought.
When she finished the brief rundown on what is Equestria and with what you can eat it, the knight just thanked her, stood up and started to leave.
But suddenly she stopped and turned toward the nearby trees.
'What happened?' Panicked Trixie. 'Did she decide to kill me? No, she's facing the trees, what could have...?'
"Something wrong?" Trixie asked out loud, hoping that it wasn't something to do with her.
"Yes." The knight answered. Trixie felt her heart sped-up, but suddenly she could hear... footsteps? "Apparently, we are being hunted." She added.
Trixie turned toward the trees and gaped, as a fully-grown Manticore emerged from the shadows. It was as tall as she, with the body of a lion covered by grayish-orange fur, blood red mane and crimson red scorpion's tail. On its back were a couple of wings, obviously not big enough to carry it, but enough to glide through the air. Its front legs were several times thicker than the hinder set, and looked laughable in comparison.
Trixie could only gulp in fear.
Manticore weren't very smart, but it was compensated by their sheer physical prowess. Even if it’s not as strong as say a Dragon, Hydra or Cragadile, they compensate for it with their agility and their uncanny ability to learn. Trixie once saw how a fully grown Manticore defeated five members of the Royal Guard, sure none of them were Unicorns, but it was still impressive!
'And scary.' She reminded herself.
The Manticore stared at the black figure in front of it, the thing stared back. Trixie could swear that she saw something flick through Manticore's eyes before it roared and charged.
The figure didn't even twitch.
When the beast was close enough, it attacked with its tail, trying to pierce the chest of its pray with the stinger. Normally it would have worked, no one could dodge something that fast-moving. But its opponent was anything but normal. The being's left hand shot up and caught the stinger right in front of its chest.
'How the hell someone could be that strong?' Thought Trixie.
To stop a Manticore's tail with such ease was more than astonishing! Its tail was nothing less than made out of muscles and had enough strength to break through metal with relative ease. The direct piercing strike from its sting could actually pierce an enchanted set of armor, and to stop it dead you'd need an insane amount of physical strength!
The Manticore apparently wasn't deterred by the fact that its attack was stopped and lunged forward with its left paw, ready to rend the being’s flesh. The claws didn't even came close to their target, as the black blade stabbed right through the paw, pinning it to the ground. This time, the Manticore roared from pain. Releasing the beast's tail and pulling her sword from the pinned down limb, the knight-looking being jumped back to gain some distance and stood still upon landing, observing the result of her actions.
The Manticore, seeing as its pray was willing to actually fight back and was quite capable of injuring it, was now more cautious in its approach.
Trixie wasn't sure who was the prey in this fight, but one thing was obvious, the first move of the black-clad being was more of a warning, than anything else. She simply showed the Manticore that the beast will lose this battle. It would be eviscerated as a result was its own choice. Trixie wasn't sure why she was still sitting and not running away from the battle of these two monsters, but she knew that she must watch it till the end.
The Manticore suddenly rushed forward, trying to take its opponent by surprise and put it down with the swipe of the uninjured paw. Apparently the black knight wasn't as surprised as the beast hoped, because she just sidestepped the attack, making the Manticore stumble from the miss. Not wasting the opportunity the being moved.
Trixie didn't even see what happened, it was all a blur for her, one moment the black thing was standing on one spot and then it appeared right behind the Manticore, the beast's right-front leg flying leaving behind a short bloodied stump. This was unreal, the speed with which this monster moved was impossible. Trixie could see the ground where the being stood not a moment before was broken apart, from the force with which the knight pushed herself to gain such an acceleration.
It was a moments later when the Manticore understood what had happened and roared in pain, while blood was gushing from the place where its leg used to be. Without the proper support the beast collapsed on the ground, still crying in pain.
'Damn, that is kind of anticlimactic.' I thought, turning around and looking at the convulsing beast on the ground.
Prana Burst was kind of an overkill, I didn't want to actually cut the thing's leg off, just to leave a sizable gash to scare it away. Well, there wasn't any other way for it to go now, other than six-feet-under. With the injury like that I'm sure that it wouldn't be able to hunt anymore, it will be lucky to actually move faster than a cripple on the electric wheelchair with a dying battery.
I was actually surprised when a fucking Manticore came out from the forest. I mean, this place was getting weirder and weirder, and I really was hoping that this was the toughest beast around here.
'Shit, I just jinxed it, didn't I?' I resisted the urge to facepalm.
But back to the present. I was surprised to see a beast straight out of legend, and my mind actually went black for a moment. Who wouldn't have a serious system-fail when you're face-to-face with something that can be considered a higher-tier Monstrous Beast! The only thing that saved me from becoming the first human-on-a-skewer was the fact that from my perspective the beast was moving very slow and I didn't have any problem with catching its tail right before it could try to pierce my breastplate.
Now I really was thinking how much did I overestimate the local fauna, because there just wasn't any way in hell the a Monstrous Beast will go down that easy, even when its opponent was a Servant. It was becoming more and more obvious that this land was not as close to the Age of Gods as I thought earlier. I was finding Trixie's explanation more and more lacking in the details department.
'Well, at least she's still here.' I thought after checking from the corner of my eye.
It was possible that I tried to adapt the local Magic to the Type-Moon system of Thaumaturgy, and considering that the whole place was...
I was really glad that my eyes were hidden behind the visor, because they were as big as a dinner plates at the moment. The Age of Gods didn't end here, it was still going full swing! There was two Divine and Immortal beings ruling this land who could move celestial bodies as easy as breathing! There was no Gaia here, and that meant that any Magus here won't need to fight it to influence the world around him or her, the whole planet didn't have a conscious will to survive and to exterminate the local population!
'Alright, the last part was a bit grim, but the fact is still valid.' I thought.
It meant... I really wasn't sure what it meant for me, but it was still an important discovery. There were a lot of things that now made sense, even the casual way that the local treated Magic.
'The locals will probably flip if I would tell them what a true Magus does with a newfound species.' And again my treacherous mind decided to ruin the moment.
Yeah, the real Magus will probably dissect the local population for the sake of finding out everything about them. Gruesome and unethical but true. Good thing that there apparently wasn't any of them here, and I hope never will, I really don't want to see what someone like an Einzbern will do, if they ever get their hands on this chest of treasures.
'Bloodbath. It will be a manhunt without any mercy, even for elders and children.' This actually made me sick in the stomach. My grim thoughts were interrupted by another pain-filled roar from the injured Manticore. 'Better end it quick, I'm not heartless to leave it to suffer.' I thought and started walking toward the beast.
Trixie was having a very hard time not barfing her insides out at the moment, the amount of blood that she was exposed to at the moment was more that she saw in months, and that was saying something. She wasn't a stranger to the wildlife and saw several times how the natural order works, the predator will always be a predator, and the prey will always be prey.
What was happening here was too gruesome to be considered natural in any way or form.
When the black knight started moving towards the injured Manticore, Trixie already knew what was going to happen but couldn't look away, there was just something that was keeping her eyes locked on the black figure. When she reached the beast's side, Trixie was ready to collapse from the pure tension in the air that was almost choking her.
The knight raised her blade.
One swing and the beast's life ended with its head being severed from its body.
Trixie collapsed.
'It really reminds me of how uncle Berth took me hunting with him.' I swung my sword once to clean off the blood. 'He drilled it into my head that even if they are animals, you still need to respect them and end their lives as fast and as painless as possible. Something about being grateful for the food...' The last thought actually made me frown.
I didn't know how much time I was wandering this place, yet there wasn't even an ounce of hunger in my guts or fatigue in my muscles. Servants didn't need to eat or rest, so apparently it applied to me too now. But I still wanted to eat something, even if not out of hunger, but to keep that little piece of normality that still was with me safe.
I looked at the fresh corpse.
'Well, if it doesn't kill me...' I thought.
*Thud*
I turned to look in the direction from which the sound came, and saw Trixie unconscious lying on the ground.
'Great, just great...' This time I did facepalm.
Gilda was sulking. Well, she would never actually admit it, but it didn't make it any less true.
'Its all their fault.' She thought.
Gilda knew that she wasn't the best of characters, but it didn't mean that she was a bad person. Her problem right now was her old friend, a Pegasus, Rainbow Dash. They were friends from their time in Junior Speedsters flight camp, but apparently it was worth nothing to the prismatic mare. Gilda wasn't always rude like she behaved when she was in Ponyville, but it was really hard to act normal when you were afraid.
Yes, she was afraid, and Griffons like her aren't suppose to feel fear! She was afraid of losing her only friend, and apparently it did happen right in front of her. All because of that stupid pink abomination with ADD, that was like a cockroach coming back, no matter how many hints Gilda dropped. All she wanted to do was to spend some time with Dash, remember the good times, and just relax, but apparently this Stinkie Pie was too mentally underdeveloped to get it.
'I couldn't even think up a good insult...' Thought Gilda.
She still could remember Dash, when they were in the camp. She was... tough at that time, they even started a couple of fights just for fun and always came on top. Then Gilda had to return to the Griffon Kingdom to finish her training, while Dash apparently went her own way, with it ending in the company of some lame twits. Yes, Gilda was a little socially awkward, but her upbringing as a Griffon wasn't all sunshine and daisies.
'Yeah, considering that dad made me go through the damn military camp, where I was to toughen up, right. More like develop a severe case of paranoia in the society of aggressive, warlike megalomaniacs that communicates by bitting each other's heads off! It wasn't a single night when I wasn't afraid of being killed or worse, eaten alive!' Thought Gilda.
The training that she went through was nothing to scoff at, her dad being a caring parent meant that she got the toughest and most demanding teacher that the Kingdom produced. Now, that she was free of them, she wanted to see her old friend and maybe relive some old times, but apparently Dash was now hanging with the pathetic lot.
The pink... thing in Earth-Pony's skin was apparently dumb as a rock, mentally as mature as a three years old and suffering from a sever case of oral diarrhea. Gilda could see that the girl really meant good, but only from her perspective. Seriously, kiddy jokes? Gilda could feel her IQ dropping, just by being in the presence of the mare! There is such a thing as maturity, and apparently it got her only half-way, because her big rack was the only mature thing about the girl. Gilda actually questioned if the girl was normal, because mid D-Cup just can't happen on its own!
'And considering how much sweets she ate, I kind of can see where she got the fuel for it...' Thought Gilda.
Then there was that other Pegasus, who was also friends with Dash. Well, Gilda was kind of at fault there, but it was more in the line of acting on instinct, than actually trying to hurt someone. Gilda was a Griffon, and therefore a predator by nature, and when she saw that girl, Fluttershy if she remembered correctly, her instincts kick in a high gear.
'She can probably win that award as the softest sentient life-form in the world hands down.' Thought Gilda.
Spineless was an understatement! She was boneless and apparently an animal-lover. When Gilda saw her leading what can only be considered food in Griffons’ eyes, she kind of reacted on reflex and put up a challenge, forgetting for a moment that she wasn't in her boot-camp anymore.
'I really think that there is something in the water here, because I refuse to believe that the more lame you are, the bigger you are.' Thought Gilda with her left eye twitching. 'A high E-Cup, whose ass did she kiss for it?'
Gilda wasn't jealous or anything, but it just irritated her that someone as pathetic as her could get a body like that! There was just something cosmically wrong about the whole thing.
Suddenly Gilda smelled something that pushed away all of her gloomy thoughts, and made her stomach rumble.
Blood.
Fresh blood.
Gilda was an Omnivore, but being a predator by nature she always preferred meat. There was just something in meat, that no amount of greenery could replace, something primal that made it all the more tasty. Gilda really didn't care if the meat was raw or cooked, she could eat it both ways and by the potency of the smell in the air, it was something big!
And it was near!
Creeping as quietly as possible, Gilda made her way towards the source of the smell. She would have been totally silent, if not for her stomach rumbling from hunger.
'Well, I hope that luck is on my side.' Thought Gilda as she neared the bushes from behind which the smell was coming.
She was about to take a peak, when a hoarse female voice rang through the woods.
"Your presence is not a secret, so I will request you to step forward and state your reason for attempting to sneak upon us."
'Damn.' Gilda knew that the voice was talking to her, she could practically feel someone's gaze on her. 'Well, lets face the music.' She thought and stepped out from the bushes.
'De fuck is she?' I thought as I studied the new arrival.
When I sensed someone approaching, my first thought was to run, but seeing as Trixie was incapable to guard herself at the moment, and there was no way I would carry her around, there was only one way, to stand and fight if needed. Well, not as much as fight as beat the crap out of someone or something stupid enough to sneak upon me, but the point was still valid.
Well, first thing that I could tell about the guest, was that she was female. If not for the hourglass figure, the couple of B-Cups on her chest was kind of a dead give away. She had a head that closely resembled eagles, but with smaller beak, apparently to accomplish the anthropomorphic look, white feathers, amber eyes with light purplish gray rings around them. What was supposed to pass as her hair was also feathers, just in a different structure with several of them sticking forward like a quiff, with their tips being light purplish gray color too. Her face really resembled a human. The only difference was that half of the face resembled an eagle as well.
White feathers were going down her neck right to the collar of her sea-blue top. From under it then came a body covered in light-brown fur. Her arms were covered in hard yellow skin from the elbows to the tips of her claws, and with the parallel lines going around this part, they strongly resembled bird's legs, only with five fingers and a human’s hand structure. She also wore short jean shorts that, that apparently didn't stop her from having a lion tail, with the tip a darker-brown color. Her legs looked normal, except her feet were thicker and had cat-like claws on them.
Oh, and she's got a couple of damn wings on her, big enough to actually fly, if my eyes weren't lying. They were covered in feathers of a darker-brown color, and twitched from time to time.
'Congratulations, Dr.Moreau, it's a girl!' This thought almost made me break my stone-cold facade.
The Griffon-like being looked at me, then at the corpse of the Manticore and then said one thing I didn't anticipate.
"Are you going to eat that?"
'This is the most bizarre situation that I have ever been in, and I can't even come up with a metaphor better than this!' I thought bitterly.
"I was going to, but with the lack of proper tools to carve it and harvest the edible parts, I'm not sure anymore." I said in a flat tone, I don't think I will be able to use any other with all the revelations coming more and more and crashing my perception of the world, leaving me in a constant state of mental numbness. "I'm willing to share the harvested parts for your assistance." I really didn't like to dance around the matter, and its not like she could actually harm me.
'I'm going to hell, one way or another...' I thought when I saw the gleam in her eyes.
Trixie woke up from the smell of a something really tasty. Opening her eyes and seeing as it was day already, she tried to get herself fully awake.
"So, you just wandered around here without knowing where you were?" She heard a voice.
"Correct, and after my encounter with the Cockatrice, I met with the trio of Timberwolves, that apparently were not intelligent enough to avoid me." Answered the voice of the dark knight.
"Heh, that they are!" Answered the first voice. "Damn, Saber, you'd need to be very good with your blade to pull that off, and considering what you did to the Manticore, I'm hard pressed to argue with the results!"
Manticore?
Suddenly Trixie remembered what had happened before she passed out, and it made her jump on her feet.
Blood.
Violence.
Dead Manticore!
She turned around and looked in the direction from where the voices were coming.
'Where the hell did the Griffon come from?' She thought.
Gilda was having a good time for once in days!
When she first came from the bushes and saw the one that called her out, she thought that she was going to lay an egg right then and there. Whatever that thing was, it was far more intimidating than anything she saw in her life!
She looked like a short Earth-Pony that never saw the light of day, with how pale she was, the creepy black armor with the visor and the sword just made it even scarier. But what made Gilda almost gag, was the sheer presence of the being in front of her. In her military training training she was taught how to judge someone's presence, basically measuring their strength without actually encountering them in combat. It wasn't that hard to hide one's presence, or how her instructor called it, Warrior-Spirit, and the reading wasn't always accurate, but right now that wasn't important.
The black-clad girl towered over Gilda, like mountain over a rock. Her stance, her body-language, everything was screaming that she was an Apex Predator. The amount of bloodlust just rolling off of her was astonishing, Gilda was almost choking on it.
And suddenly it all just vanished.
Just like that.
'Calm down Gilda, you're not dead yet, and if you play it cool, you'll probably get out of this at least alive!' She thought, barely resisting the urge to fall down. 'Alright, think, what could you say to her?'
She looked at the girl in front of her and then at the dead Manticore. Its front right leg was cut off, along with its head, and the cut were far cleaner than they should be. That meant that the strength and speed of the one who was cutting was more than enough to ignore the bone, and that said a lot about the girl, and how sharp her sword is. And considering that there wasn't even a speck of blood on her, Gilda could only guess just how good she was with her weapon to not even get a scratch while fighting a fully grown Manticore.
'Well, here goes nothing...' Thought Gilda.
"Are you going to eat it?" Gilda really wanted to smack herself right now.
'Nice start, dweeb! Of course she isn't going to eat it, she's a...' Her thoughts were interrupted by the same voice that called her out earlier.
"I was going to, but with the lack of proper tools to carve it and harvest the edible parts, I'm not sure anymore." Said the girl.
Gilda had to take a double-take. An Earth-Pony admitting that she was going to eat meat? That was like some sort of a bad joke! Ponies didn't eat meat, they were all for the peaceful co-existence with others and not harming a soul...
"I'm willing to share the harvested parts for your assistance." Added the girl.
'Or I can just roll with it and get a free meal out of it.' Thought Gilda with a hungry gleam in her eyes.
Ok, first. as a response for some very interesting PM, I'm telling this to everyone:
No, Jessica won't become Everfree's version of a Woodman!
[youtube=www.youtube.com/watch?v=gmbdq4RKc8c]
No matter how many arguments will be said about it!
Also, here is how Gilda looks like:
Oh, and join my group! Lets move the theme together!
Stats
Page generated in 0.057 seconds
Total duration
671 users online
822,845 hits today, 2,054,621 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
I really like how you did Trixie and Gilda in your story. they are my two favorite characters in the whole show!
Really nice chapter by the way!!!
Ey dude, you need to correct a LOT of sentences... I suggest you take the chapter, put it into word, read through it and fix it.
Things like "She head the head that" does not look good =\ Other than the grammar, nice chapter! Looking forward to the next one.
By the way, do you have a proofreader?
4066250 Nope.
4066264 i wuv your work... and you... but mostly your work
This is brilliant.
I get the feeling this chapter is a bit more rushed than the last, because there are a lot more grammar mistakes than the last one.
Though I really like the story and the way you make the first contacts between characters that only appeared once or twice in the show and were never mentioned again.
What's up with all the italics? There's way too much emphasis happening in here.
That Gilda is faptastic.
I don't understand! It's... So rarely, almost never, do I ever read a story with bad grammar and still lik- no wait, love it! How does it work like that? Usually bad grammar kills it for me, but I guess your story is just that awesome.
Great story.
4066274 Thank you.
4066537 Thank you.
4066606 Not rushed, just had to remove a couple of parts.
4066616 Emotins are flying around...
4066624 First try writing her type, glad that I hit the nail...
4066685 Skill and nothing more.
4066691 Thank you!
Second chapter, very nice. Rather clumsy portrayal of Trixie and Gilda though. There is no need to repeat their reasoning time and again, once is enough. If you're having trouble being subtle about your characterization, then at least be concise. Subtlety will (hopefully) come later.
Also, too much italics/bold cheapen their effect.
And of course, obvious heaps upon heaps of mistakes. If you don't edit your work at all, do start please. If you do, try to be much more thorough. There is nothing wrong with re-reading and re-editing your chapters several times. No one forces you to post it before it's ready.
for the love of all that is unholy and holy, PLEASE keep this up
I am SO wanting more
of the hot Gilda
Hmm... time for another ginormous post. Admit it, it's going to be a thing since I'm going to hit the favourite button after this because I am intruiged despite the mistakes. And by god here they come;
Those.
These.
Their.
Next, she displayed some simple tricks that looked much more impressive
A simple illusion of an appeared out of nowhere bouquet of flowers can affect the crowd the same way as if someone conjured a whole castle out of gold, it just needs to be properly delivered.
Supposed.
Lose.
This girl just overcame a dragon's resistance to Magic.
Wasted.
Trixie knew this type of Unicorn.
Restraint.
Then Trixie all but called out the Unicorn with abnormal power levels.
Normally her training was very tiring and left her barely able to move from the strain.
Trixie didn't know whether she needed to save the morons or to throw them into the beast's mouth.
When they come into physical contact with someone, they start to actively suppress his or her Magic and with an Ursa being a fully-magical being, they were like poison to it.
The problem was that she only had enough to tie them around tow of the beasts legs.
Normally she used these ropes to tie up the idiots that would try and rob her.
While she casted a minor illusion over the Ursa's eyes.
The misconception about the beasts magical resistance is that they will resist all magic used on them, but that isn't true.
A simple illusion that didn't even touch the Ursa wasn't affected by its resistance to Magic so it can work as a pair of glasses that prevented it from seeing Ponies. If it sees that there is no food here, and with the ropes basically draining its strength, the Ursa will leave without actually attacking anyone.
((Mother of god, that one sentence that I had to try and reconstruct
))
She listened to everything that was said about the incident.
It was official, this town was doomed even without the Ursa's rampage.
And the only money that she had.
When the... creature triggered her Magical bomb she had planted into the ground.
Breathe.
Whose.
If a normal blast can be considered a Magical equivalent of a punch, then her version was a stab of a spear.
Form.
The girl took the chance and darted behind the tree.
The mine itself was a bit of a rushed experiment, an overpowered spell that created a wave of kinetic force to fight enemies with high resistance to Magic.
The more Magic you charge into the powder, the stronger the fire it will produce when in direct contact with air.
I was still sane an logical, so I knew that I will be screwed when I show up at home as an almost immortal being of colossal destructive power.
The ice enclosed my feet, immobilizing me and everything else in a five meter radius.
But alas, it was a spell and that would mean that my Magic Resistance: A would protect me. The attack didn't even tickle.
In this case, I believe the will/would both work. So you can view the one 'correction' as just another way to write
The white crystal was more tricky, when it contacted with my sword, it released a burst of wind.
Dinner.
Is this the end.
These two Princesses shouldn't be able to pull off such a feat without basically having unlimited Prana at their disposal.
But with a more naive way of thinking.
With my sword on my knees and staring at her without moving a muscle.
It's not like she's got a choice here, someone who could pretty much walk through a raging inferno without even a tan was way out of her league to try and run away from.
But she was still creepy, even with her polite attitude.
((I was told once that I scared one of my friend mothers for being too polite. Now I look back and find it funny
))
When she finished the brief rundown on what is Equestria and with what you can eat, the knight just thanked her, stood up and started to leave.
Decide.
But enough to glide through the air.
Comparison.
Compassion mean Kindness.
Manticore's weren't very smart but it was compensated by their sheer physical prowess.
Powerlessness means... not very strong at all. Weak even.
None.
The Manticore stared at the black figure in front of it.
Trixie could swear that she saw something flicked through the Manticore's eyes before it roared and charged.
Twitch.
To stop a Manticore's tail with such ease was more than astonishing.
The Manticore apparently wasn't deterred by the fact of its attack being stopped and lunged forward with its left paw.
This time, the Manticore roared from the pain.
The Manticore, seeing as its prey was willing to actually fight back.
Trixie wasn't sure who to pray for in this fight but one thing was obvious, the first move of the black-clad being was more of a warning than anything else.
She simply showed the Manticore that the beast will lose this battle. Will it be eviscerated as a result was its own choice to make.
The Manticore suddenly rushed forward.
Wasting.
It was a moment later when the Manticore understood what had happened and roared in pain.
Beast.
Human-on-a-skewer.
Beast.
I was finding Trixie's explanation moreand more lacking in the details department.
Treated.
The locals will probably flip if I would tell them what a true magus does with a new found species.
Yet.
Losing.
All she wanted to do was to spend some time with Dash.
Severe.
That the Kingdom produced.
Kiddy.
Gilda could feel her IQ dropping just by being in the presence of the mare.
There is such a thing as maturity.
A high E-Cup, whose ass did she kiss for it.
Something primal that made it all the more tasty.
If.
That.
If not for the hourglass figure, the couple of B-cups on her chest was kind of a dead give away.
Ahh... the wonderful, wonderful world of breast size classification... let's give Rainbow a flat chest just to fit with the hilarious context I read in a 4koma MLP comic
She also wore a pair of short jean shorts.
She's.
So, you just wandered around here without knowing where you were.
Correct, and after my encounter with the Cockatrice.
This is going to be a regular thing for me, so don't mind if my posts are long and basically 90% corrections.
I'm just wondering though, I don't think it was mentioned at all in the story if ponies have tails. So far griffins do but I'm just curious.
So if I can almost get this right... the only difference between the three pony races are physical attributes. So that means we aren't all people. We're all just Earth Ponies but forgot about it
Speak is present
Spoke is past
Spoked has nothing to do with talking
Speak is present
Spoke is past
Spoked has nothing to do with talking and it being a real word is debatable. dictionary.com could only come up with 1 quote of the word being used
you have surpassed my liking you have done will enjoy your victory
...Sweet jebus gilda is hot....
4066879 By ye olde gods... I knew it was bad, real bad actually, but you just tore it a new one. And it's perfect! I laughed hard while reading your comment, because, while it is true and many have already mentioned the errors, actually seeing most of them pointed out makes one realize how bad it actually is. The best part? I still love the story! XD
4066828 1) I work almost full day, so I'm tired with a half-fried brain when I'm writing. I'm trying to type with a cup of black one, but I think my body is starting to develop an immunity.
2) Italic and Bold are for for emotions and meaningful words respectively.
4066860 I'll try!
4066879 You're the best!
4067208 Ok...
4067217 Be warned, the third wave if coming and I will hold my place as the Champion!
4067231 I'm starting to think that the only reason that people like this chapter is Gilda's picture...
4067262 Good to know!
4067280 ahahah that's what i like to see a strong sprite but be warn i am giving you very rare advice. when times come to hard to moveforward take a step back and rest then move forward.
4067280
Regardless of your state in your writing sessions, if you want to write better, one of the surest ways to do so is to simply invest more time in every chapter. I want this story to be better, even if it comes at cost of waiting longer for new chapters.
Some logical nitpicks:
1. Physical explosions should throw Saber around just fine, even if they don't damage her. She weighs 42 kg, not a ton, so kinetic energy will move her as easily as any other short female. She has to be hooked to something stationary or use her Invisible Air to stay in place.
Also, I'd imagine Saber would've sunk into ground a bit when tree fell on her.
2. I'm not a biology expert, but afaik our sense of smell is supposed to be useful. If something smells nice to us, it's edible or specifically evolved to smell pleasant to someone (e.g. flowers). Thus Trixie - herbivore - probably will not consider smell of cooking meat tasty. I would like to hear someone who knows biology here though.
4067589 1) Trixie didn't place the bomb on the ground, but under the ground.
Also, the tree was falling down from a standing position, it just didn't have the time to gain the momentum.
2) I already explained this in my comment to chapter 1.
4067262 You can expect the same for about every chapter from here forth to be almost as long. Though of course I'm not as likely to be able to catch all the mistakes, just most of them.
Heh. You know, if all the humanized ponies- What? Oh, right. And gryphons are as... aesthetically pleasing as their usual fanart depictions, this place might well be somewhat depressing for a normal teenage girl.
Of course, given the body she currently wearing, she's got nothing to worry about there, whether it's currently in creepy mode or not. But self-image doesn't adjust that quickly.
good chapter and loving how you portray everyone but both chapters do have a number of grammer or spelling mistakes, mostly its just a missing letter or word in the wrong place but it does detract from reading the story, fix them and turn this story from very good to GREAT.
I am quite impressed
who's that in the cover picture?
Moar plz?
I don't like huge chests ... I dislike big chests... and Gilda my friend unless you got my size you do not have to worry...your not small...
am not jealous ether.
or crying...totally not 
Good story so far! I love how your portray characters. and how you put out something that hadn't realy been brought up in any other story besides, the ones from Dashverse...cant remember the name off the top of my head. Then again it wasn't even really brought up as it was a different Twilight. Also I like this Gilda.
Gentle breeze guide your way. a warm smile welcome your return.
Love how the pow on the "bad guys" when they recall the memories of their episode in ponyville makes the reader see the feelings and motivations behind their actions.
just a bunch of grammar and spelling error... apart from that its a really good story!
you have my attention
I really like how you didn't make Gilda and Trixie total donkeys or go through a redeeming phase. A lot of authors on this site do that, and it's great when you find an author that calls out the mane six for stuff glossed over in the show. Awesome story, and I can't wait for the next chapter.
Ah love it
I hope you include Gilad's reaction when she finds out she's talking to an ape and not a pony.
I almost expected this to play during the battle:
GILDA JOINS THE PARTY!
4067280
That's probably not the main reason. It is a plus to have that lovely picture and it does help with the mental imagery (If she did look like that, outfit and all... woof!).
I must have read this after you did a touch up on it since I didn't out right notice any major mistakes.
That being said, I did enjoy this chapter and I'm looking forward to more in the future!
Alright, so, about the picture of Gilda. This may come off as a little blunt, but...
Am I the only one that noticed that her tits were literally popping out the bottom of her shirt?
Also, excellent story, Zaralann, I look forward to new chapters!
4054941
Huh. I didn't know that. Thanks for letting me know!
4067690
When's the next update the suspense is KILLING MEEEEEE!!!!!!!!
4066860 I agree on this and I say she sounds like a girl I'll hang out
Dame, the timing of this was almost as spot on as it could have been for me. At the start of this month i found this anime reviewer by pure chance on YouTube, and through him i was brought aware of this franchise called Fate. The reviewer made the anime out to be in short "fucking awesome", and after watching the first fifth chapters/episodes of Fate/Zero I am happy to say he was right it fucking is.
Now a week or so later I find this a Mlp fanfiction crossover/hybrid of that very franchise, life is good when things just fall into place.
Now before I say anymore about this story i who'd like to point out some grammar/spelling inconsistencies, I found from this chapter (#2) and chapter#1
Personally if i where to dedicate substantial time and effort on writing a story like this, I who'd want others that read it to point out all the faults they can find to allow me to correct them so what i create who'd be of the best quality.
A position i hope you share and there for wont take offence, If you do please forgive for that was not my intent.
(Only reason Im spewing this exposition is that i have had writers feel somewhat insulted by me trying to correct them in the past despite that never being my intent)
CHAPTER #1
Change the "I" at the start to a "She", or the "her" at the end to an "my"
add "is" between the "fuck" and "whit"
turn the "it" to an if.
add a "the" or "a" before Protect.
add an "I" before already.
CHAPTER#2
This is not wrong in any way i can see, the sentence flows so much easier if you remove the "the" before Ponyville.
"stranger" i believe you where aiming for "stronger"
remove the "a" before young or change the structure to "even at such a young age".
2st "the"
It was wearing black armor with glowing red lines over a black dress.
as the mist surrounding the creature shrouding it, suddenly sprung up around the being.
I pulled my arm to the left and.
got before a monstrous crescent.
-----Divider-----
other way for it to go now.
When she finished the brief rundown on what Equestria is and what you can eat in it.
Trixie could see the ground.
She had a head that.
It wasn't that hard to hide one's presence. (someone's refers to another and one´s to one´s self, which is what i think your where going for)
I think they saying goes "light of day".
"deer" not dear.
she (was not/ wasn't) a bad person
This little list turn out to be longer then expected, and i was a bit lazy in some of the phrasing but it should still be easy to correct thanks to Ctrl-f if you want to that is. i wish to add as well that i am not some self proclaimed expert at grammar and im not saying all the correction i suggested above it correct. English it not my native speech and i have on top of that always been week in grammar, but i do believe what i said above it mostly spot on.
That aside, this story if pretty dame good, first of the premise is spot on for what kind of story's i like. I fancy story's where they main character have some power or ability that separate it form the rest of the characters.
Human by DannyJ and it´s spin of (story's that everyone reading should at least give a try) exemplifies this perfectly, and this girl being effectively transformed into this saber character falls right in to this, want of mine.
I like that the fact you choose to go with this alter version instead of the blue "good" saber adds an additional + to it, I love villains and even tho this Jessica character seams to be a nice persona, her evil vibe and just all around malicious appearance (and the polite cold attitude to match) just makes it better then before, and in this case i believe it serves the story well that she is in all aspects a normal being than 100% on either side of the spectrum
The dialog interaction, personalty, all good and fine by me, the way for exempel how you told the Gilda and Trixie episode form there perspective (whit a flair of artistic licence of course) was nice and quite believe.
The highlighting of certain key words where a nice touch as well, for me it worked perfect as i had a Fate wiki open on another tab
All in all despite the substantial amount of linguistic faults (that i hope you correct)
(almost like this novel excuse for a comment)
This is very dame good, i hope you try and keep it that way think things true and plan the story ahead not just write each chapter whiteout concern for the next and i am sure this will not be disappointing. Grate work, easily added to favorites and account followed, keep them chapters coming and the good times role.
Who knows perhaps this will be an 200.000+ word epic
4097690 Thank you! And one more thing:
Is not a wrong-written sentence! It's a crude translation of the Russian saying "что это такое и с чем его едят".
4100272 okay i see, me myself I who'd know nothing about Russian so not much i can say to that.
I still think my point is valid tho, some sayings an words can´t be translated exactly and need modification to fit the new language.
But as you said its not wrong per se in my opinion, it just docent flow as easy as it could have done, but again Im realy just nitpicking here and it docent relay maters.
What to me maters a bit more perhaps is that it is a good thing to see that massive excuse for a comment was actually read so good thing there to see i did not wast my time whit it, anyways.
I wish you good writing and hope the wait for the next chapter will not be to agonizing ^^
4106175 Thank you!
I currently trying to chew the whole thing enough so there won't be any need in the outside sources.
Oh, and can you tell me which part of the story required the Wikia?
static4.fjcdn.com/thumbnails/comments/+_7b3f80f117247aa81f26a14b7a4fb7d8.gif
The Gilda picture is so hawwwttttttt
4051731 There's another that's just as good (if a little slow for the first four or five chapters) called Fate/Twilight. It places Twilight in the role of Caster in the place of Gilles de Rais. Ryuunosuke is also replaced. Check that out, I couldn't stop reading it.
Dang, she would fit well where I live!!!