How I Met Derpy

by Infinty Blade Brony

The Hole to Equestria

Ever since that night, Derpy and I shared a bond stronger than anything. That rift in the Alleyway changed my life. It made life...suddenly so much brighter. However, It was also because of this that school sucked balls, now. On Monday, David started more shit with Derpy, constantly making her cry. I'd be trusted by the teachers to comfort her, which was good, but I had just gotten a cold...which was bad because I had a cold. I can't sing as well with a cold. So, I had to find other methods. On Tuesday, I got into a fight with David, and got Save room the rest of the day for breaking his nose and splitting his chin. On Wednesday, The worst possible thing happened.

Here comes the explanation;

So, remember that night Derpy told you about? Well, somehow David found out. He hates me as it is, so he decides to use it as ammo. As I walk to homeroom, I see David and some guys standing around her. One of them is being an utter douchebag and pretending to lift up her skirt. The other is laughing at her, pointing and everything. Finally, David is talking shit about her, saying thing like "Oh, you're a fucking slut. Go suck a dick. You know you want to. In fact, how's about you suck my friend's dick." As the guy pretending to lift her skirt grabbed her, I pulled my hood up and walked up to him. I put my hand on his shoulder. He turned his head to look at me, only to find some guy with a cargo vest, hood pulled low over his eyes.

Suddenly, as he tries to push me, I grab his hand by the wrist, and twist his arm inwards. As I do this, in one fluid motion, I jab him super hard in the gut. He takes a couple steps back, and pukes all on the floor. The other guy charges me, and I punch him in the face, knocking him back. He gets back up and tries to take another swing at me. I duck under and hit his inner calf, knocking him on one foot. I jump up, my foot kicking him in the face. He flipped and slammed face-first into a locker. A crowd was starting to form, they had seen what happened, so I was confident I wouldn't get in trouble. David tried to judo-flip me, but I grabbed his wrist and twisted his arm behind him. I then let go, smacking him in the back of his head. He got pissed, and swung at me. I blocked it, and rammed him into a locker, his head hitting a locker.

I snapped. I pulled him away from the locker, and headbutted him. He started to bleed through the nose. He kept trying to hit me, but I just either stepped back or blocked. Eventually, I yelled "ENOUGH!!!" and did a Sparta kick, sending him flying into an empty classroom. He got up, and he was dead tired. He swung, but missed. I took his arm while it was in front of me, and twisted the elbow upwards. I banged my head against his elbow, cracking the joint. He yelled in pain, and I flipped, kicking him in the face.

He rested in the hospital, and I left a note by his bedside that said, "FUCK YOU!!! Sincerely, Ian AKA the guy that gave you a bottle of whoop ass." I was already long gone, heading home by the time he read it. I was suspended for a day, however, because some of the teachers saw what happened. From beginning to end. I got home, and saw Derpy sitting on the living room couch looking defeated. The rug was soaked from the tears that fell from her face, and they were still falling. I came up to her and sat next to her. She tried to stop the teachers from suspending me, and they suspended her too in the process. She could care less about that, though. She wasn't even really a transfer student. She cared about the things David said. Calling her a slut, telling her to suck a dick; that bothered her the most.

I thought for a bit, and had an idea. I turned on my laptop, hooked it up to the TV, and played a particular song on YouTube;

I got up and held my hand out. She looked up, and saw my hand. She smiled weakly, and took it. She got up, and as the song played, I sang her the words. She blushed, and her tears stopped. I then brought her in and danced with her. She started laughing, the tears drying. I laughed a little, too. When the song ended, she looked up at me, and kissed me for so long Mom had finally come home. Mom just saw us, and smirked as she walked away towards the kitchen. I told her that I would take her to the rift now, if she wanted to. She nodded, and I told Mom that I was taking Derpy to the alleyway so she could go back to her original home. She simply nodded and said, "If it has to do with that rift, then I'll know you got sucked in if you don't return." How she knew about that rift, I've got no clue. But I just went with it. I left and grabbed the keys in case.

So, we walked into the alleyway, and looked into the rift, seeing a blue sky and...carrots. I lead Derpy to the rift and held her hand. The air started to suck her in, and when it did, I at first turned to walk away, but I realized I couldn't do that. She was my life, and I realized that a long time ago. So I ran towards the rift and jumped in. As I got sucked in, my body transformed. It didn't hurt a lot. My body shrunk, my hands and feet turning into hooves. My nose and mouth stretched into a muzzle, and my hair grew into a mane similar to a ruffled Mohawk. My skin went from tan to a light brown. My ears pointed at the top and moved up the sides of my head. That's not the part that hurt, though. The part that hurt was when wings sprouted out of my back and extended to the size of Princess Luna's wings.

Suddenly, I shot into the air, and braced for the impact that would meet me when I fell. But when I opened my eyes, I was hovering over the dirt floor. I looked up, and saw my wings flapping. They then stopped, allowing me to plant my hooves firmly on the ground. I looked around, and I saw a pony with an orange mane and tail looking at me with a confused look. I looked at my new body, and noticed two things...well, three;
1. I was still tall, even as a horse (damn it!)
2. I still had a cargo vest on.
3. I had a cutie mark. It was a heart with a treble clef inside it.

I couldn't believe that my talent was making music and having a love for it. I was always told I was an excellent writer. But, as I tried to think about it, I was tackled by a pink pony with poofy pink hair. I knew her from the show as Pinkie Pie. She looked at me with a huge grin and said, "Hi!" I looked at her awkwardly as she started to get off of me. I got up with some struggle, and saw her bouncing up and down. She told me with great excitement in her voice, "You're the third new pony I've met! First was that Lowell pony, then Gage, and now YOU!!!" I looked around, and finally spotted Derpy upside down against a tree. I galloped towards her and held out a hoof to help her up. She laughed and took it, then got herself right side up. She realized she was still holding my hoof twenty minutes later, and instead of letting go at noticing, she tackled me and kissed me. Pinkie brought her Party Cannon and shot me with it, sending me flying into the air. Next thing I knew, I was in the hospital with a fractured foreleg and a broken wing.

'Well, Ian,' I thought to myself. 'Quite an interesting turn in events...for example, you somehow found your laptop in your backpack.'

That gave me an idea.

Comments

[MilesMaster2006]

FINALLY! A new chapter!

[Music the Looping Traceu]

4106242 Yay! You read it!

[BureYaAkili]

4104713
And thus. Thru the power of boredom and my own lunacy. We find our author. Doing what he does. So yeah. Nothing really new than

[The Metallic Dash]

4106249 Ian we need to talk about this chapter

[Infinty Blade Brony]

Wait so you came to Equestria after me.......well the more you know.

[Sir Top Hat]

That. Was. Beautiful!!! But how did he learn how to walk as a pony so quickly?

[Music the Looping Traceu]

4106998 He? Dude, that's me in the story. You didn't know, did you?
That's cool. rainbowdash123456789 didn't know it was me at first, either.

[Sir Top Hat]

4110164 I know it's you lolz

[Sir Top Hat]

So how's your channel?

[Music the Looping Traceu]

4110331 XD, anyways; I know the difference between walking as a horse and walking as a human. Because of this, I instinctively knew how to walk as a horse with ease.

[Music the Looping Traceu]

4110336 Meh. I'm apparently being watched I guess worldwide, now. I'm being watched in places like Germany, australia, Sweden (OMIGOD, I'M SUCH A PEWDS FAN!!!) and Russia.

[Infinty Blade Brony]

Wait you woke up at that hil......time just fluxed!

[Sir Top Hat]

4110363 ohmehgerd me tooooo!!!!

[Midnight Moonshadow]

Shoot him agen

[Music the Looping Traceu]

4118879 Huh? What do you mean?

[monkeytsu]

Finally a human that doesn't turn into a freaking alicorn.

[Whiskey Drops]

I still never figured out how she popped up from under my wing...

[JazzyWaffles]

He swung, but missed.