I Got A Jar Of Dirt
Shining Armor groaned as he woke up on the deck of The Black Pearl. Cadence looked down at him and smiled. Shining Armor returned the smile.
“What happened to the chest?” he asked Cadence as he got up.
“Lightning Dust took it to draw them off,” said Cadence.
Elsewhere on the ship, Rainbow Dash, jar of dirt tucked under her wing, walked alongside Applejack.
“Where’s the commodore?” asked Applejack.
“Oh, she fell behind,” said Rainbow, walking to the helm.
“My prayers be with her… but, it’s best not to wallow in our grief. The good news is, you got off and made it back free and clear,” said Applejack, joining Rainbow at the helm.
As if on cue, The Flying Dutchman burst from the water, right beside The Black Pearl. On board, the crew of lizard-ponies growled and snarled at the crew of the neighboring ship.
“Faust on high, deliver us,” whimpered Applejack.
“Don’t worry yourself, AJ. I’ll handle this,” said Rainbow. She lifted the jar of dirt over her head. “Hey, lizard lips!” she yelled.
Spike Jones glared down out Rainbow. What the Tartarus is she doing? was the thought that came to his mind.
“We wouldn’t have lost something, now would we?” said Rainbow, before falling down the stairs of the ship, which made the whole crew groan. Rainbow lifted the intact jar of dirt. “It’s okay! I’ve got it!”
As she got up, she continued to mock Spike. “So, you’ve come to negotiate, have you, you scaley punk? Lookie what I’ve got. I’ve got a jar of dirt, I’ve got a jar of dirt, and guess what’s inside it?” sang Rainbow, much to Spike’s irritation and both crews’ confusion.
“Enough!” snarled Spike.
The Dutchman’s mouth-like portholes opened up and the cannons appeared, aimed right at The Pearl.
“Hard to starboard,” said Rainbow through a wide-eyed grimace.
“Hard to starboard!” yelled Cadence.
“Brace up the foreyard!” yelled Shining Armor.
As The Black Pearl turned sharply to starboard, Spike yelled, “Hard to starboard! Send that pathetic little pony’s beloved Pearl back to the depths!”
“Fire!” yelled Komodo.
Cannonballs tore through the back of The Pearl as Silver and Diamond saw that The Dutchman was right on their tail. “She’s on us! She’s on us!” yelled Silver.
“Let them taste the triple guns,” said Spike.
“Aye, Captain,” said a crewpony.
On The Dutchman’s bow, two triple-barreled cannons stuck their business ends through their port holes.
As Applejack tried desperately to get The Black Pearl out of range, Rainbow Dash took the helm.
“Come on, my darling! Show us what you’ve got! Come on!” said Silver as she patted The Pearl’s railing.
Within an hour, The Black Pearl was almost out of the range of the triple guns.
“She’s falling behind!” said Cadence, looking behind at The Dutchman.
“Aye, we’ve got her now!” said Applejack, joining Cadence and Shining Armor at the railing.
“Wait a minute, we’re the faster?” asked Shining Armor.
“Aye, if we were against the wind, The Dutchman would beat us, that’s how she takes her prey, but with the wind-” said Applejack.
“We rob her power advantage,” said Shining Armor.
“Aye!” said Applejack.
Shining Armor thought for a moment. If The Pearl can outrun The Dutchman, then maybe I can use it to rescue Twilight!
On board The Dutchman…
“They’re out of range!” said a crewpony.
“Break off pursuit, run her light and douse canvas!” ordered Spike.
Komodo approached his Captain. “We’re giving up, sir?” he asked.
Spike said nothing. He merely smiled...
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Oh fuck.... The Kraken.
Five bits say they last five minutes
4212457
Place your bets here! Who wants a flutter in tomoorow's kraken fest!
4212476 Is it a huge leviathan or sea serpent?
Steven?
4214039
Actually, it's an oversized giant squid, just like the movie.
4216819 Ah, okay.
I'm curious as to how much you would change from the pirates movie. Would it be subtle or huge?
Well, I guess I have to taste it and find out.
4217034
A bit of both, perhaps. But subtle more so than not. Some of the lines in there (i.e. "Ehh... given a liberal definition of the word 'pirate' and the "almost innocent bystander" bits) were actually cut lines from the movie. Also, since Cadence and Rainbow are both mares, I'll have to come up with a workaround for the kiss.
4217076 Ah, make en kiss anyway.
Just make it extremely awkward and likely a misread of emotions, makes scenes with rainbow and cadence awkward and funny.
4217365
Sorry, but it's still a no on the kiss. What will ikely happen is that Cadence will use her magic to cuff Rainbow to the mast while they're talking.
4217396 You mean like the end to the of mice and men movie?
4217554
Pretty much. Except there's no rabbits involved what so ever.
4217787 Oh, okay your highness.
4212457 Ill raise ya 10
4266559
Call. Make ma day mate.
4266565 15.
4266584
Art thou declaring war. 20
4266587 35! hahahha
4266592
-sucks air through teeth- Ima regret this call and raise 10
4266603 hmmmm, 75.
4266606
Note to self give up poker. I admit defeat fold.
4266621 Hahaha, Good Game. *takes winnings off the table and walks away*
4266629
"At least by a guy a drink after you take him to the cleaners"
4266638 (Post deleted cos I had a better idea)
*Tosses some Rum to you while I walk out the door*
4266760
Sweet and it only cost me 75. Huzah
Just so ye know. Davy Jones smiles and Marcus realizes what Jones is planning and smiles too. Also the crew member says uh oh when they realize the drums have stopped.