Chapter 5 - Had I the Heavens’ Embroidered Cloths...
It only clicked once I actually spotted the black crown almost lost against her swirling mane. It was a bit hard with the different eyes and colors, but I could just barely recognize a face I’d been shown earlier today. I wasn't quite certain it was a good idea, but I let the ‘magic’ I’d pulled in go, since at least trying to talk things over seemed wisest when face to face with royalty. “So… Is there a reason the secunda of these lands is taking time out of her schedule to bully a wizard, or is today just some weird minor holiday I am unaware of…?”
If she’d been pissed before, my remark on her rank must have hit her straight in the minority complex given how her mane flared and the wind I hadn't imagined picked up. “What did you call me?!”
I plucked a golden bit from the air, and threw it towards her. It landed on the dusty ground between us, the gleaming sun on it sparkling in the light. I did the same with a silver one… and held it up towards her sunny side up, if you follow. “And silver that’s even so associated with the moon… Shame, really.” I flicked the thing away to my side, not even bothering to watch where it landed. Instead, I plucked forth a copper coin with the image I didn't yet recognize, but the important bit was that the crystal heart clearly wasn't Luna’s mark. I started juggling the thing up and down with my thumb as I continued talking. “Now, granted… I will freely admit it, those aluminum bits? They look rather decent… but even there, your mark doesn't even get a solo performance. And even then, how often do those coins pass the hooves of the commoners, I wonder? It may be ever so subtle a reinforcement, but damn if it isn't potent stuff to show who is actually in charge...”
It seemed that despite the fury I frankly wasn't certain what I’d done to earn, my words were finding their marks...but I can’t say I found it that much to my liking. There were just these flashes of pain, a wound nearly ancient but still raw and festered, in her eyes whenever my cruel arrows were let loose…
With a small shrug, I flicked the coin one last time before folding my arms. The unheeded coin fell upwards into the azure sky. “Perhaps something to keep in mind for the next minting, then? Still, Your Highness, I must insist you explain what I’ve done to earn such ire.”
I honestly thought I might have made some headway with the honorific… but her face went from shocked surprise straight back to livid as I actually finished my sentence. I decided to do my best to not underestimate this mare as a single stomp from her sent cracks rocketing almost ten meters away from the small crater her hoof now occupied. A gale also started up as her eyes lit white in fury, forcing me to hold my hat down.
Then, a small series of satchel-charges set by a mad demolitionist apparently went off, somehow forming the simulacrum of words with the blast waves. “YOU DARE?! AFTER THE STATE YOU LEFT OUR DEAR SISTER AND THE FAIR TOWN OF PONYVILLE IN?!”
I winced and tried to ignore away the ringing in my ears, but my body wasn't as easily convinced as the scenery it seemed. “Lady, do that freakin’ thing again, and I’m pinching myself awake and damned be the consequences.” I snarled and jabbed a finger at her. “And what I did?! I fell from the fucking sky and apparently stopping yourself from going splat was the crime of the flippin’ century!” I swept my hand over the landscape, and willed the likenesses of the three idiots into existence. I snarled and pointed my staff at the PPP. “At least the two other idiots had the excuse of jumping into a fray their buddy was in, but this waste of magic?! She nearly tore me in half for falling from the sky!” I’d completely lost it and stomped up the now stunned looking mare hard enough that the ground rumbled, pulled her head down by her horn and glared straight in her shocked eyes. “And you're here to give me nightmares over that utter farce of a welcoming?!”
Now, manners towards those worthy of them aside I do consider myself an equalist and you can bet your ass I’d at least slap a dude over invading my dreams... but I still surprised myself with just how loud the resulting smack was as my hand met the cheek of the newest idiot I had the misfortune to meet on these shores. “Because in that case, bring it, you walking soot stain!”
For a moment, all was silent… then Luna did that living bonfire thing that apparently happens when ponies get really angry and gave me a hay-maker that made my clock ring, and sent me reeling back almost a meter and onto my ass. “You dare?!”
“What? Have a freaking vocabulary, you nimrod of a monosyllabic twat?!” I grabbed a handful of sand and threw it straight into Luna’s face. I reached back for another handful, but it seemed my subconscious was nearly as big a bastard as I am because instead of sand I felt my fingers close around a nicely sized rock. I let my missile fly without hesitation; hitting the royal bastard squarely on the horn. Not only did this force a grunt of pain out of Luna, but as a bonus it apparently broke her concentration enough to stop doing the Johnny Torch impression too. “Well, then let me descend to your vocabulary level, you idiocy singularity! You! Dumb! Nag!”
I barely had time to roll out of the way as two armored hooves came crashing down, while Luna sneered down at me through streaming eyes. “You dishonorable lout! If you have the audacity to strike the Night herself in her domain, then have the decency to stand and receive the wages of your folly!!”
“Make me, you over glorified, super-sized throne warmer!”
Luna let out a huff and went googly eyed as my staff hit her straight on the ribs with a rather satisfying crack, but to the nag’s utterly limited credit she just swiped the thing out of my hands hard enough a few fingers almost came with it from the feel of it.
I just barely had time to get my arms in front of my face before the solid length of oak came whistling down at my head. I have no idea how I didn't wake immediately from the impact, because even with the facsimile of my duster I’d whipped up it felt as if somebody had dropped an entire bleeding bookshelf on my arms. And not one of those flimsy crap things from Ikea I’m supposed to like just because we share the same country of origin, but one of those sturdy things in steel and bolts.
Honestly, I was running on so much adrenaline I was mostly pissed that the staff broke. “Do you have any idea how hard those are to make?!” I snarled, it being just a dream temporarily forgotten in my anger.
Let me tell you… a one ton horse shoving half a staff against your windpipe with both hooves and snarling down at you with teeth just a bit too pointy? Not cute, not even when it’s one with wings, horn and a picture of a half-moon on her butt. “Image just perhaps, wizard, that I do not care.”
“Oh?” I pressed against her and the remains of my staff, but she had both the weight and strength advantage… and knew it. Didn't stop me from glaring up at her though. “But I’m supposed to care about the galaxy wide ego of a single bastard and her two friends that joined the fray she started?” I spat the twit straight in her face to Luna’s obvious shock and disgust. “Because here’s a hint, you bastard, I don’t give two figs if those wankers are the chosen champions of the realms or what freaking ever, because I’m not the one that struck first.”
Luna raised a single hoof shaking with fury and started wiping her face clean. “Your actions tonight say otherwise.”
If my voice had been any dryer, I would have been able to join a circus as Björn, the Human Dehumidifier. “I’m sorry, but who blew up a teacup in whose face again?”
For just a moment, she hesitated and the pressure let up… but not long enough for me to exploit it. “Do you honestly claim you have no idea what you did? Don’t play coy.”
It was like swallowing glass and washing it down with vinegar, but I just barely got my boiling fury under control to speak calmly. “Ma’am… I used minimal force —except that one last unfortunate attack because my rings had accumulated more charge than I had anticipated— to make what I’m getting the vibe is three spoiled nobles who think that they can get away with anything they damn please, to back off. Then I left town, despite the nearest other one being days away on foot through monster infested countryside. If that is not good enough given that I was attacked for falling from the sky... you can frankly go blow a hydra.”
Luna, who’d just finished getting the spit of, gave me a disgusted look that was actually stronger than when I… well, spit her in the face. “...I have met creatures torn from hells with less foul mouths than you.”
“And I so do not care. Now get the hell off me before I make you.”
The arrogant fool actually threw her head back and laughed.
Hard enough that the staff wiggled around, and let me get my hand free from under it. I wasted no time in shoving my hand forward and shouting my spell. “Vento servitas!”
To my irritation if not surprise, the one ton horse creature wasn't easily shifted by winds even in a dream like this. However, thanks to all the ruddish sand surrounding us being whipped about I still got an opening when she needed to rear back a bit to shield her eyes with a hoof.
I wasted no time. My hand darted down in one smooth motion, grabbed my blasting-rod and pointed it at the royal pain. “Forzare!”
The invisible beam of force slammed into her, and fueled by my anger as it was it actually blasted her about ten meters… Although to give the she-devil her dues I think that last bit might have had quite a bit to do with how she spread her wings to gain a controlled descent.
I couldn't quite resist giving a cheeky smile and wiggle my other focus at the glaring Luna. “And that is why being able to make spares is quite the advantage!”
I got a hot snort for that one, but Luna herself just stood there; quite clearly just waiting for what I’d do next.
I barely bothered to spare a glance at the kindle the staff was reduced to before getting to my feet and brushing off. Besides, this was a dream and I’d lost enough proper sleep to not treating this battle as such.
Sure, I could just will the darn thing unbroken… but I felt I’d only get this pretender to back off if I made a statement.
This was a place of will and imagination, and if this eager young fool of a foal wished to test herself against a wizard in such an arena… then so be it.
Given that ‘Luna’ was staring at me as if she’d seen a mouse turn into a dragon, I didn't think that would be such steep a task. I actually caught myself mid pat, and instead just willed away every stain, bit of dust, and scrape I’d gotten during this so-called battle.
As every damn thing she’d done to me melted away like butter in a solarium, I of course re-pocketed my rod and gave her a tiny clap. It may have been misguided, but talent should still be encouraged after all. “Well done, kid, you actually had me fooled for a bit there.”
‘Luna’s’ face went from shocked to an actual jaw drop.
I pressed on, as I held out my hand and my ‘broken’ staff flew into my hand and merged into a whole once more without even a flicker of magic. I wiggled it at her with a smile. “Now, you’re decent, I’ll grant you that… but you made a rather big mistake and your dream walking isn't nearly as impressive as whatever hack thought you has told you it is.”
I must have hit a nerve again, because her eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets —something that looked really damn freaky on a pony, let me tell you— before ‘Luna’ snarled at me.
I swept a hand over my face… and took on ‘her’s’ before sticking out my tongue, wiggling it around and making the scrunchiest scrunchy face I could. “See?” I said, in ‘her’ voice. “I can badly imitate royalty too!”
In response ‘Luna’ lowered her horn and fired a blast my way.
I didn't even bother with gestures or anything; I just willed the thing to make a ninety degree turn straight down into the ground.
I snapped my fingers and let my mask fade away. Well, the one I could do so with, anyway. “Now, you really had me with those pangs of pain when I mentioned what a clear second stringer Luna is…” The mare reared back as if I’d slapped her, but only for a moment before squaring her shoulders and glaring at me. “...but frankly, you accidentally called that Twi twit sister. Oh, and I refuse to believe that a mare that almost brought about ‘night eternal’ is this damn weak.”
The false Princess hissed at me. “Do not mistake mercy for weakness.”
I shook my head, my hands crossed on my chest and my mouth a thin line of disgust. “Ma’am… speaking as somebody who actually knows enough basic astronomy and magic to know the type of forces involved in even faking stopping the sun, let alone actually doing such Saturday morning style villainy? Frankly, my mind should have winked out like a candle in a freakin’ monsoon if the real Luna was here.”
‘Luna’s’ ears flickered in annoyance… but I’d grant that the girl was a good actress, because I saw that pang of old pain thing again. “And what, does Saturday have with villainy to do?”
“Where I am from, it’s the traditional time for…” I searched for the words so I’d be certain she got the gist. “...special plays aimed mostly at young children. They often have comically inept villains with stupid, stupid plans. Weather machines and holding a single farm’s crops hostage instead of selling the damn thing and making billions… Building giant robots and robbing banks instead of trying to get a weapons contract or something…” I narrowed my eyes and made sure to deadpan. “Trying to kill the sun for the evulz…”
The mare hissed at me like an angry snake.
“Granted,” I continued in a conversational tone, “according to the cliff-notes version I got demonic possession was involved as for that last example, so it isn't quite fair…” I must admit I began to doubt my… well, doubt as this flash of grief passed over the face of what might have actually been the real McCoy. Her reactions were just too fast and smooth for being in a dream. “Of course, I don’t see much reason to actually be fair towards the mare that has invaded my dreams, so no matter who you really are I can’t say I actually care.”
I changed my mind when Luna seemingly got more angry at my dismissal compared to my taunting. It just seemed to fit more with the type of persons that consider themselves strong enough to call on demons and not believe there will be a price involved because of their ‘awesome skills and power’.
Needless to say from what I’d seen so far, I was frankly surprised the girl wasn't a stain inside an almost perfect circle, or something.
I jabbed a thumb towards the rolling hills. “Look, girl, say your piece and leave, or actually get this party started already.” I cracked my neck as she narrowed her eyes at me. “Because that little warm-up was quite satisfying, but if you think the limits of my imagination is a throw-down you've got another thing coming.”
Luna let out a rather equine sounding snort of fury, to be blunt, but it seemed she at least was trying to open a dialogue. “Fine, you arrogant pretender to power. Do you have any idea, what you did?”
I let out a sigh and willed a stool into existence. Trying was certainly a good word for this mare’s view on diplomacy.
She let out another snarl occupied with twitching ears as I sat down. “And stop doing that to this poor dream!”
I looked down incredulously at the simple wooden stool I’d willed into existence. Then I looked at the big blue idiot with the same nearly bored look. “This is a dream.” I pointed a finger at her. “And I frankly don’t care what the local culture has to say on those, because this is my dream.” I jerked my head back towards the hills. “If you don’t like what images my mind conjures up, then go take a hike.”
Luna gritted her teeth. “Is force all you understand, you overdressed monkey?! Does kindness and subtlety mean nothing to you?!”
I waggled a finger at her. “And if this wasn't my mind and you that forced yourself in here, you might have actually had a moral leg to stand on…” I pointed at the rather blatant totem of power hanging in the sky despite how I’d willed it to be day. “And you were saying something about subtlety?”
Luna just held her head high. “My moon is a beacon to all dreamers that aid has come.”
I rolled my eyes slightly at the dramatics… but I had to concede the point. “Fine.” I leaned forward with my elbows on my knees and my staff on my lap. “But now when we’re actually talking like I tried back there in Ponyville, how about you actually walk me through what…” I lifted my hands and made air-quotes. “‘dreadful things’ I've done? We could have it be a thought exercise, perhaps, where you speak with me like I’m this involuntary dimensional traveler that’s rather peeved because he has been trudging through forests filled with flippin’ monsters for several days, or something…”
Luna let out this snort that steamed in the air, kept scraping her right hoof absently hard enough you could have planted in the resulting furrow and judging from how her eyes were these angry little slits I barely know if she could actually see through... I took that as these subtle signs that this mare didn't particularly care for sarcasm.
Do I know women, or what?
Still, to the mare’s credit —even if I had to admit I frankly considered her deep in the red for that damn tea-cup and the whole entering my dreams uninvited thing— actually took a deep breath and tried to calm down. “The mares you atta-”
“Defended myself against,” I corrected firmly. “Actually acknowledge who started that damn fight, as I know you do, or this conversation is over.”
Luna gave me a cold look. “After the horrible state you left not only ‘Twi’ herself, but the entire town? Frankly, I will not give you the satisfaction.” It might have been the dream, but it frankly felt as if my nose was freezing slightly as the look got even colder. “Not all wounds are of the flesh, wizard... and I have been fighting the nightmares of an entire town for several days now, just because an arrogant whelp didn’t yield.“
Ah… I bit back a wince. If this girl really was some type of wizard so strong she might as well claim the goddess title instead, and of the Night with what that entailed…
Well, suddenly it made a bit more sense why I’d caused enough ripples to be noticed by royalty. A big black blot on what she considered just an extension of her lands from the sound of things? Yeah, that sounded as if it would do it, alright.
It just wasn't fair to feel bone-weary in a dream. “Ma’am… I tried to walk away, but that Twi girl stopped me from doing so. Then I delivered a single blow to end things, checked that the misguided girl wasn't dead from it… and walked away. Frankly, unless you’re here to beat the metaphysical stuffing out of me in revenge, I’m not certain what more you want from me.”
I felt a slight stirring of hope as how tired I sounded actually seemed to be getting to Luna. It wasn’t quite enough to smooth the waves, but at least there was this barely noticeable flicker of hesitation there. “And the amulet you refused to relinquish…?”
I reached into my pocket and pulled out my amulet and held it up so Luna could see it. “Fine, this thing apparently almost looks like some artifact of doom thing... but where from I’m standing that doesn’t actually change anything even if it is. It sent me here, ergo it’s my best bet for getting home, and there is no way in any hell, heaven or the twisted places in-between I’d give it up just because a somebody asked rudely for it. End of the discussion.”
Luna held up a hoof. “Give it here.”
I raised an unamused eyebrow at the mare.
The ghost of a rather bitter smile hunted Luna’s face for a few brief moments. “I assure you, that was the polite version given the circumstances.“
I bit back a snort. “For the record?” I jiggled the amulet a bit, making the silver and ruby gleam in the light. “If I wake up and this thing isn't exactly where I left it because it turns out you know some freaky dream ritual that lets you take actual stuff, but only if you have permission? I will be at least as annoyed as I was back in Ponyville.”
“Duly noted,” Luna said in a voice that could have frozen a flame.
I decided on keeping it simple and just swung the amulet around on its chain once, before letting it go flying directly towards Luna.
I barely kept a grin of my face as she flinched slightly before catching my amulet with her hoof. “...That wasn't magic.”
“What?” I asked with barely contained humor. “Didn't expect the ‘overdressed monkey’ to have a throwing arm?” I decided to be a bit cheeky and plucked a lollipop from thin-air to Luna’s clear chagrin. “You’re just as dead from a rock to the face as a lightning bolt, you know?” I continued as I plopped the small snack into my mouth. “Overspecialize and you breed in weakness, and all that.”
Luna had seemingly decided to ignore me and my antics, but I still saw her ears perk slightly at my last words.
For a few blessed minutes all was silent. I just sitting there enjoying the sun and the taste of chemicals twisted into a mockery of cherries, while Luna kept throwing near every diagnostic spell she could at the small amulet.
It was honestly decently entertaining to just sit there and watch her mutter what seemed to be swears in languages I didn't even recognize, while she got more and more agitated.
Alas, before too long she let out a scream of frustration and threw the amulet into the ground so hard it made a decent crater.
Luna then turned to me with her eye twitching and this snarl on that would have been threatening if she hadn't been so gosh-darn cute. “What trickery is this?! Why can’t I see the magic of this thing?!”
I carefully took the lolly from my mouth and gave her a level look. “It’s almost as if I was told the thing might be an artifact that twists the user, and thus stuffed the thing into the deepest pocket I have until I can actually examine it properly.” I lifted a foot and wiggled my somewhat worn looking boot at her. “Hint: A forest where you all but trip over cockatrices isn't what I’d call a properly furnished lab.” I replaced the lolly with a smile as Luna glared me down. “It’s almost as if I have a brain and can form these things called ‘priorities,’ or something.”
This rather satisfying sound filled the air as Luna gritted her teeth. “And you didn't tell me this, because…?”
“Because I don’t like you, and you never asked.”
Ever seen a winged unicorn glare at you so hard it’s quite clear she’s all but trying to make your head explode from sheer hate alone? If not, it’s this rather interesting mix of wrongness and adorableness. Like a puppy in an SS uniform, or something.
She sat down on her haunches and did some type of breathing technique, moving one hoof in tandem with her breaths.
It didn't really work from how hard her jaw was still set when she stopped. “You are not making it easier for me to believe your side of this story.”
I turned my head and spat out the now empty stick my lollipop had been reduced to. “Image just perhaps, Luna, that I do not care.”
Luna did that scrape at the ground thing again while letting out a slow breath. “...I will not fault your Honesty, at least.”
I made mental note of that I actually heard the capital H when she said Honesty. A local cardinal virtue, perhaps? It didn't seem immediately useful… but cultural trivia like that never do, not until you're suddenly standing there with a disgusted and slash or furious local and wondering what went wrong.
Basically, I didn't worry the slightest about being an irritant to this arrogant prick that clearly needed to be taken down quite a few pegs… but I’d rather not be declared anathema by somepony that apparently at least in part lead a country where a third of the populace was natural mages.
Well, if she wanted honesty…
I let out an irritated sigh and got to my feet. “Ma’am… with all due respect, I don’t think I’m big enough a thorn in Equestria’s side for you to worry about, and I’d frankly prefer to keep it that way.” I lifted my hand and snapped my fingers. “So how about we go with how things looked from my perspective?”
Luna clearly tried not to look queasy as the scene around us shifted. Rolling hills of sand turned to cobbled streets, cacti and bushes to ponies going around their business, houses faded into existence as if woven from thin air…
And the three images of three certain ponies that had stood all but forgotten darted off to take their positions, just as their puppeteer willed.
And then, a tiny screaming speck fell from the heavens.
It wasn't my strongest moment, but I leaned against a nearby building and pulled my hat down over my eyes as I just waited for the mix of a reenactment and a flashback to pass.
Call me old fashioned, but having to see that farce and knowing that it ended with what was clearly a civilian all but smeared on a door? Yeah, once was more than enough.
Still, even the sounds were enough to make me cringe a few times. There's just no sound quite like bones breaking, for one. I think it’s the mix of an almost gunshot loud snap, while still having this slight muffled quality to it thanks to the flesh in the way.
That it’s one of those sounds you have an instinctive revulsion to doesn't help matters. The added twist of the knife that I knew both that I’d done that, and that it had been a girl mostly there trying to protect her friends and town?
Yeah, I fully expected I’d be hearing that sound in quite a few dreams to come.
“...You actually expect me to believe this account when you clearly can twist dreams as easy as a pegasus may fly?” Luna said in an even but hard voice as the sounds died away.
I tilted my head and thought it over. “A fair enough point.”
“Really? That’s all you have to s-”
“I swear on my power that was as I remember it, just changed to a third-person perspective for easier viewing.”
A slight shiver passed through me as the vow did.
Luna however, hissed in shock and seemingly took an involuntary step back.
Several tense moments passed before she spoke again. “You know a lot of dangerous things, it seems.”
I tilted my hat back… but my eyes lingered towards the tree-house rather than Luna. “Almost like I’m a wizard, or something...” I nodded towards the red stain on the door my memory insisted wasn't that big, but my imagination apparently was having a bit too much fun tormenting me with. “You really know that girl and want her to live to old age? Get her and those friends of hers some proper anger management classes, some lessons on negotiation and some combat training.”
“These are peaceful lands and times,” Luna said in a surprisingly gentle but firm voice, “and such measures are unnecessary.”
I turned my head towards her and gave her a hard look. “You do know that I was holding back, right? No offence, but it’s rather plain you've actually been in a few scraps.” I nodded towards the town-square. “To be utterly frank, those girls seemed as if they expected me to take a single hit and then just go lay down.”
I wiggled my fingers a bit and willed the image of Twi into existence. Wings spread, and horn aimed straight at my heart. “That Twi girl has a bit of potential, but the other two?” I shook my head. “Nothing wrong with being kind or merciful, but if you’re in combat you actually need to know when and how to strike to be so…”
“And Twilight?” Luna asked in a rather firm voice.
I waved my hand and its force rings at her. “These things were supposed to be nearly empty, but they must have gotten a boost from me falling, or something.” I mimed making a slow punch, aimed away from her just to be sure. “I honestly thought I needed to trigger them all just to shove her over…” I shivered a bit. “That girl is lucky to be alive, to be blunt.”
Luna hesitated for a moment over something. “And yet you lectured her?”
I gave her a hard look. “One day, if she keeps jumping into a fray just because her friends started it… she won’t come out. If me using five minutes to rub her nose into how much she has yet to learn can save what seems a good and talented if stupid kid from dying a dumb death before her time? Hell, I’d tweak her broken bones with salt if that was what it took.”
Luna spluttered, but I just turned my head and smiled slightly. “I claimed to not be in the wrong here, not a word about being a nice man.” I gave a tiny shrug and leaned a bit harder against the wall. “Besides, a free-fall from a kilometer or two up and a battle straight afterwards? I had so much adrenaline coursing through me I’m frankly amazed I could walk straight, let alone huff and puff myself scary looking enough that it stopped at just three idi- would-be heroes.”
I saw Luna’s ear flick at my slip, but she clearly pretended not to notice. She seemed mostly troubled by the rest of my words. “Cruel to be Kind? I have to admit, I have never understood that philosophy.”
“I don’t know what level that Twi girl is on by Equestrian standards… but whoever her teacher is, that person should be ashamed of himself.” I ignored a small sputtering sound from Luna’s direction and instead shook my head sadly. “I mean, seriously, who teaches their pupil teleportation before counter-spelling? Or that type of massive blasts before enchanting? Whatever hack is teaching her nearly lost a student because of that foolishness and I frankly hope you rub it in the pony’s nose.”
“And what level would you say ‘Twi’ is…?” Luna asked in a careful voice I’m not sure I liked. “Just curious.”
I made a face of horror as realization dawned. “...Holy hell, please tell me that wasn't a certificated mage by this place's standards!”
A look of pure irritation flashed over her face, telling me all I needed before the words did. “And if she is?”
There were no words. I just leaned my head back and face palmed.
Luna, I kid you not, growled like an angry dog at me.
I lowered my hand and head and gave her my hardest glare. “Ma’am… if I’d been serious, your friend would have been dead before she had time to fire a single bolt.”
“There is more to magic than combat, you brute!” Luna snapped my way, with spittle flying, wings flared and everything.
“Yeah, but it’s somewhat important if you consider yourself something of a town protector!” I countered without hesitation. “Especially when you live a stone’s throw away from monster infested woods!”
Luna sucked in an angry breath but I leaned away from the wall and cut her off. “Fuck this, I am not spending my whole flippin’ night arguing.” I rolled up my sleeve and held my right arm up, ready to pinch it…
Luna just smiled sweetly at me.
Too sweetly.
“...What?”
The dark mare let out a laugh that sounded way too genuinely happy. “Oh, child… you have to sleep sometime.” She theatrically sat down and studied her hoof. “If you believe you’re getting away from this well-deserved attention by your betters that easily, then you are quite mistaken.”
I let out a snort and pinched…
The cheeky twit actually waved me off as I woke with a jolt.
I had to let out a groan as reality started to reassert itself. “Fuck me, why did I have to fall on the one twit in this world with connections…?”
I slowly —emphasis on the slow part— crawled myself out of the nest-thingy, feeling every muscle screaming at me while doing so. I’m not sure if it was just sharing a dream with somebody, or if it was how I’d lost my temper earlier… but I felt worse than when I’d gone to bed the first time.
Was that her plan? If dreams were her ‘domain,’ she might see nothing wrong with just keeping me from sleeping correctly until I all but sat down and begged just for a single night’s good sleep.
I had to admit, it had a rather deviously diabolical simplicity to it.
I grumbled my way over to my duster and got to work.
Some steel-wire, a few bits of paper, a surprisingly big part of my string supply and a few old shell-casings…
I held the fruits of my labor up in the swiftly fading evening sun, and the small dream-catcher gleamed in the golden light.
I grumbled as I stumbled over to the window and hung the darn thing. Truth be told I wasn't even certain it would work, but there was no way I’d just roll over and present my throat to that smug twit.
My back screamed at me at the mere thought, but I went over to my duster and grabbed an assortment of gems and started stuffing them into the bottom of my bed. I was way too tired to even think about the various defensive powers of gems, but needless to say I’d be sleeping in what hopefully should be the magical equivalent of one of those military bunkers with a whole mountain on top.
I let out a sigh. If only this version didn't also depend on big, pointy rocks…
I then got back to my duster and sat down on the floor and started on what might have been the angriest crayon scribbling ever.
Perhaps it was the fatigue, but I had to admit I got slightly giggly at that bit. “Yes! Fear my inner six-year olds’ wrath!”
Even with the simplicity of the symbols, it took a while. But a few dozen hands of Fatima, eyes of Horus, pictures of snakes, arrows, and stars of David later, and…
Well, my room looked as if the strangest damn six-year old had gone a bit cuckoo, to be blunt, but symbolically the pictures carefully strewn all-over were potent stuff.
I had to go back and rummage, but I lucked out and found a few old salt packets from McDonald’s in the very bottom of one of my pockets. I made a mental note to buy more salt before getting started.
I opened one of the packets and poured it into my open palm, before walking over to the door and throwing a small pinch at it. “Once, I cast you out, unclean spirits! In the name of all things Good and the right-hand path, be gone!” I felt a slight stirring with my non-mundane senses, but I ignored it.
I poured the salt into my right hand from the left, and throw another pinch with my left this time. “Once, I cast you out, pure spirits! In the name of all things Evil and the left-hand path, be gone!
For just a tiny moment, the room had this strange sense of shock to it in response to my improvised little banishing ritual. I just barely kept a grin of my face as I rubbed both hands together and wrung the salt off towards the door. “Twice, I cast you out, oh spirits! In the names of Power and Magic, be gone!”
An angry muttering just at the edge of hearing passed through the room; like a mist being driven off by a great fan.
I raised both hands in front of me… and gave the door both birds. “Thrice, I cast you out, oh spirits! In the name of all things Sacred and all things Foul, and by the Power of Threes, be gone!”
The muttering grow to a small but furious gale, as the ‘vibe’ for a lack of a better word of the place fought against me and my will.
I raised my right hand and pushed towards the door, the movement far heavier and offering more resistance than any mere air had any right to offer. “And a fourth time I cast you out! In the name of Chaos and Disorder, let the Order of all things be broken because I Will it!”
It was like pushing a car with only one hand, but slowly I forced myself onward as the air screamed in my ear, the warmth of the room itself clawed at my skin, the very slickness of the floor tried to trip me…
Only for a stillness that felt just slightly wrong to descend on the room as my hand touched the cool door.
Trembling slightly and with a slight sheen of sweat, I clasped both hands and bowed my head towards the door. “And with the fifth call comes Stillness, for even in Chaos and Disorder lays greater complexities undreamt of by lesser Minds. By my Will, my Power and my Magic, this place is Cleansed.”
A calm I can’t quite describe in words settled over the small room. I sucked in a breath that now seemed to come just a tiny bit easier, and just took a moment to stand and meditate in the silence.
Then, for the most important and most likely to work bit; I stood up straight, and started walking in a circle around my bed, quietly chanting while clapping my hands softly.
“This is the song that never ends; it just goes on and on, my friends! Somebody started singing it long ago not knowing what it was, and…!”
A soft knock on the wall broke my concentration, but was soon followed by Black’s voice. “Harry? What in Tartarus are you doing?”
“Luna doesn't like my variant of dream-shaping one bit, and we’re having something of an astral shouting-match since I like her fumbling into my dream and making demands just as much.” I explained towards my wall at a deadpan. “So I’m setting up a circle in the most obnoxious way I can on such a short time frame.”
Black was silent for a for moments before answering. “Harry?”
“Yes?”
“I know she can be a bit much and she’s got the subtlety of a hydra in a ball gown, but please don’t piss off the ancient goddess with a temper.” Black let out a groan. “I’m really not in the mood for emergency weather duty…”
I added that to the overgrowing ‘check later’ pile. So pegasi have some type of weather magic? Interesting… Still, it did sound plausible given how the PPP had reacted to a simple wind spell. “Well, anyway, rather out of my hands, but if anything explodes in my room you’ll at least know why, right?”
Black let out another groan. “Just… Please be a bit gentle, OK?”
How almost pleading he’d sounded made me do a double take.
“She’s a bit co-co, but she’s a good mare that’s been through a lot underneath it all, ‘kay?”
I had to admit, I felt a bit weirded out. “You’re taking this rather… well.”
“You’re not the first foreigner with different views on dreams I've guided, Harry.” Black chuckled softly. “And Luna gets her proverbial panties in a bunch every time...”
I wondered for a moment why a people of nudists would have that expression… then I decided that I wasn't feeling nearly enough morbidly curious to continue that line of inquiry at present time. “No promises since she started it, but I’ll try to keep the rest of it above the belt.”
“...The rest?”
“I may have dreamt up my staff and thumped the dream invader a few times…”
I swear, I practically heard the expression of shock on Black’s face through that wall. “...Oh sweet Harmony…” He then let out a small laugh that sounded almost as dark as his colors. “And then she did…?”
I let out a small cough. “...Broke the thing over my head and held me down with half of it.”
My guide let out a small sigh. “Don’t make ‘em like they used to, huh?”
I made a small grimace at the thought of a blue sea of Lunas, all glaring at me with lit horns. “...Och tacka gudarna för det.”(1) I muttered under my breath.
“What was that?” Black asked in a rather more firm voice. It seemed somepony had a slight patriotic streak…
“Nothing I’d care to repeat,” I said truthfully, “but in my defense, having to do this crap just for a shot at sleeping uninterrupted is making me cranky.” I guess I had a bit of the whole tech-bane thing after all, because above me the strange bugs in the lamp I’d forgotten to turn off started popping with a disturbingly popcorn like sound; glowing like tiny stars briefly before simply winking out with loud splats. “Cranky and wizard is not a good combo.”
I heard Black sniff. “...Harry, just what are you doing now?”
The last of the bugs went splat as I watched with a bit of worry. “It appears me in this bad a mood is enough to pop bugs…”
That seemingly shocked Black. “Wait, what?! But pyreflies can stand eve-” I all but heard his brain grind to a halt and start over. “Of course you've got enough juice just leaking out you’re popping the poor pyreflies.”
My nose wrinkled as the smell started reaching out of the small lamp. The ‘aroma’ was… weird. Like somebody had thrown rose-scented grease into a bug-zapper. “...Any chance there’s a easy way to avoid… well, that?”
Black grumbled and turned in his bed. “You just put up one of those circle things of yours for tonight, and we'll buzz over to the library for a few text on magic management before the meeting tomorrow, OK?”
“Sounds good,” I said with an absent nod, “‘night, Black.”
It must have been later than the soft light from the window hinted at, because I didn't even get an answer before I heard this soft snore drift through the wall.
I chuckled softly, before restarting my try at a circle as quietly as I could. “...that never ends; it just goes on and on my friends. Somebody started singing it long ago…”
I had soon finished and a circle did indeed form, but I must have been unsteady on my feet or something, because the thing felt... wobbly, for lack of better words.
I gave an irritated grunt, and repeated the small ritual as many times as I dared without stumbling and undoing all my work.
When I finally felt finished, I more or less needed to scoot around the bed with my feet bent to the sides around the frame, and the whole mass although unstable and weak individually was so layered I could just barely see what almost looked like a soap bubble around my bed if I squinted.
With a grunt I carefully slid back down into the bed… and almost immediately scraped a long, irritated red line on my shoulder from getting too close to a sapphire.
I couldn't quite stop a groan. I really hoped this would work, or I’d feel like a tired idiot come morning.
I’d almost dozed off… when I was startled awake by my breath coming out in a small puff, as this unnatural coldness descended over the room.
I looked towards the window… only to see frost having formed over the glass. Not only did it force itself in under the rim of the window despite the still lingering heat of summer, but the cheeky verglas right on the actual glass had a freakin’ message in it from its mistress.
It read, in a smoothly flowing feminine hand I had a sneaking suspicion was actually a hoof since the letters gleamed just a bit too much in the moonlight:
My, my… You actually tried to sanctify your room? Aren't you just full of nasty little surprises!
The outermost circle flared once as the window burst open by itself, forced open by the creeping ice.
I continued to stare on incredulously, as a single finger of frost crawled into my room proper and started forming new letters on the wall.
Such an utter pity what little of Our power We actually draw from Our beloved subjects’ worship of Us is a thing most profane, is it not? ~L
I had to admit, this girl had almost as much style as she was annoying.
I’d almost fallen asleep again… when a loud crack made me sit up with a start.
By the window, my dream catcher had basically melted. As I watched, the remnants of it rained down on the floor in a shower of parts and St. Elmo’s fire.
St. Elmo’s flames that for a brief moment spelled out: Oh! A dream catcher! Haven’t had to circumvent one of these in centuries! How fun!
Yes, she made some of the damn ‘flames’ even go cursive as they fell. Fuck me if I know how.
As I continued to watch just so the thing wouldn't burn me alive, the bits and bobs of it just laid there and sizzled for a bit; the flames slowly fading but seemingly only even warming the bits of what I’d hoped would be the only line of defense I’d need.
I fell back… and almost brained myself on a diamond. With a grumble I moved it a bit and tried to get comfy again.
I was barely surprised as I startled awake once more; this time to the smell of burning paper.
I sat up, and saw as the drawings I’d made crumbled in on themselves, seemingly without cause.
I scanned around for another message, but I guess there wasn't enough material to destroy the papers and write something out, or something, because I didn't spot one.
As soon as the last paper crumbled into nothingness, not even leaving ashes behind, I lay back down with a sigh.
Not seeing a way around it, I just closed my eyes and waited for sleep to come…
A loud ‘zap’ rang out in the room, and I just barely had time to open my eyes to see a bunch of sparks of cobalt colored magic rained down onto the floor.
And another.
And another.
And so on, like this electrical woodpecker on a high-voltage line.
It was actually a bit pretty in a ‘Alright, who put LSD in my water?’ kind of way.
With a smug smile I buried my head as deep into my ‘mattress’ as I could, doing my best not to laugh myself wickedly to sleep.
Now, I wasn't quite on the home-stretch yet. Ever heard those tales about an exorcist wrestling against the demon caught in the circle, doing their best to force the thing to stay inside the binding? Now, I wasn't quite certain if Luna would get desperate enough to do the metaphysical equivalent to smack down about a dozen or so walls with her head to get to me, but I had this suspicion that if any mage on these shores would be stubborn enough for that… it would be her.
Still, it did mean I just might have a chance keeping her at bay long term; I’d simply have to invest in making better circles every night from now than the flimsy things I’d thrown out this evening.
“...Practice makes perfect, I guess…” I muttered irritably, before turning over and slowly drifting into an uneasy sleep.
I honestly wasn't even that surprised when the field of shadows and mist faded into view again, but I had this feeling I’d gotten at least a few hours of dreamless sleep…
Even if I had to admit, hearing this soft panting in the background? Now that put a smile on my face. “Ah, now I know what trick to make more of tomorrow.”
Luna stomped out of the dark, head held high and glaring down at me… but the thin sheen of sweat fooled nobody. “I demand you tell me.”
I just snorted and folded my arms. “And telling you the one secret that seems to work in keeping you out of my damn dreams is in my interests how…?”
Luna snarled at me like a rabid animal. It seemed that at least in these venues Nightmare Moon wasn't quite as gone as even Luna herself liked to pretend, because for just a moment she had fangs, and her slitted eyes all but shone a cold sapphire color...
I was not in the mood, so I just narrowed my eyes at her. “Counter-offer. You leave my damn dreams alone, and I won’t scream how to shield oneself from you from the nearest rooftop.”
Luna actually reared back slightly as if I’d slapped her again. “You would not dare.”
The words were hard enough, but there really wasn't any mistaking how her eyes had widened in a sudden jolt of fear.
I pressed my advantage and stepped closer, putting my arms on my back for added effect. I stopped only a meter or so away from the ‘goddess’ in question and glared her down with my head held high. “Do I seem the type to bow and scrape?” I tilted my head at her… and hesitated for just a moment, but I ultimately decided on just rolling with it. “I’d thought one person with enough power and pride they’d rather rend the sky in two than bow to the will of the heavens would recognize another… but I guess I must have been wrong.”
Luna’s eyes went wide… and far harder than I’d seen during the entire evening.
I started striding around, pointedly not looking her way. “Now, I will freely admit I’m —a few exotic tricks aside— nowhere near your skill or power-level and I’m all but certain I missed quite a few parts of the tale at that...” I waved my hand vaguely in the air, and Luna let out an angry hiss as my memory of Clearcut’s illusion sprang to life.
I just watched for a moment as Nightmare Moon laughed her silent laugh, only to look over to a Luna that didn't quite seem to know if she should break down crying... or flay me on the spot.
“Now, as I said, I’m fairly certain I missed quite a few parts…” I pressed on, as the flames continued to dance in a loop. “...but you know? I think I can guess.” I leaned in a bit and gave her my biggest most obnoxious smile. “Did somepony’s pride not handle a time when the binary choices of candles or fire meant that most just said ‘buck it’ and went to sleep instead well?”
I all but saw these tiny red dots in Luna’s eyes when the scales tipped over to the ‘flay the bastard!’ side.
So I raised my hand, and snapped my fingers.
And all around us, Vegas proper in its full nightly glory faded into view. It seemed fitting, so I willed a classical black and white showman’s tux including tails, a cane and a top-hat into existence, replacing my normal gear.
I swept my arms wide and pointed down the Ritz with my cane as Luna’s jaw all but hit the asphalt. “Welcome, fair lady, to Las Vegas!” I took the hat off my head and with a flourish to it gave a showman’s bow towards the stunned Luna. “To one of the cities of my world that never truly sleeps.”
As the half remembered and half imagined crowd milled around us, I took a few moments to consider this place I might never see again. If the Windy City was a great crossroad… what would that make a place that simultaneously held both the titles of Sin City and the Marriage Capital of the World?
As my eyes drifted towards the sky beam of the Luxor I couldn't quite stop a hum and tapped myself thoughtfully on my chin with my cane.
If magic was real, and there existed at least one mage on my world… just how many of these ‘shows’ were nothing more than people that had found a way to be paid to have their powers grow? It may not be quite as potent as say an altar, a knife and the spilling of blood… but tapping the subtle power of a legion screaming your name in ecstasy at the wonders you may show was a heck of a lot safer, and less morally black to boot.
I chuckled slightly as my eyes drifted to one of the many ‘A new show, every night!’ signs around the area.
Nothing untoward towards illusionist and their skills, of course… but it was an intriguing little thought experiment I couldn't quite dismiss the logic of.
I replaced my hat and rested on my cane. Still, that was potential future business… “Alright,” I told Luna, who jerked out of her daze at the sound of my voice, “here’s the bribe. You stop bothering me over what was basically three idiots and a bad first impression, get out of my freakin’ way and let me work…” I smiled a bit wider and spread my arms as if trying to hold the entire street at once. “...and maybe, just maybe, this could be the central street of Canterlot in five years or so.”
Luna gave a hard look towards the nearest casino, where the constant blips and beepings of the slot-machines was exactly that strange mix of obnoxious and intriguing I remembered.
I put my hands back down on my cane and rolled my eyes a bit. “So this particular place is just a bit heavy on the whole gambling thing.” I swept a hand over the crowd that never seemed to quite thin, even despite the hour. “I believe my main point still stands.”
Luna, to her credit despite this deep hunger I could just barely see all but burning in her eyes, leaned her head back and thought it over.
I took how her whole body tensed slightly as she saw something as a bad sign. “...Where are your world’s stars?”
...Ah.
I snapped my fingers and shifted the whole scene to this disused field I someti- used to drive to when I couldn't sleep or needed to think.
It was a bit much and overly dramatic, truth be told, but I added this meteor shower me and the gang had gone out to see a few years ago.
I realize it’s a bit egotistical to just stand and bask in your own handiwork… but fuck it, I still spent a few moments in silence just staring up towards the Milky-way as streaks of light passed it and us by.
“...It’s called light-pollution,” I volunteered in a quiet voice as the stars twinkled far above us. “Ever noticed that the stars are harder to see for a bit after having been in a lit room? Like that, but with streets and houses instead.” I gave a shrug. “Something gained, something lost. Trite, but true.”
I looked towards Luna, who seemed to take a rather deep interest in the sky I was showing. “And this travesty goes unchallenged by your night’s master…?”
I gave a shrug and went back to watching the show above. “If there is one, I've never seen the dude or dudette… although I knew quite a few legends” I scratched absently at my chin. “Wouldn't surprise me if there actually is one or two hidden away given some things I've learned recently, but we humans have a tendency to get tetchy at people with power, and quite a few of the old-style gods were utter bastards.”
“...Tetchy?” Luna asked.
I turned my head towards her and just said it plainly. “A couple of centuries ago, the populace of this land called France figured out that nobles die just as easily under an executioner’s axe.”
Luna reared back slightly. “What?!”
I shrugged and plucked another lolly out of the air —lemon this time, if it matters— before continuing. “There was a famine, and the queen was so sheltered that she said when presented with that even bread was in short supply, and I quote: ‘Why don’t they eat cake, then?’” I made a small flame dance over my open palm; the small speck of fire almost blinding in the dark. “I believe I don’t need to tell a fellow magician how nasty a spark may be in the wrong place and time?”
I glanced towards Luna, and even in the dark I could see how she’d paled a bit. No doubt there was at least a few relatives and such she could imagine in that role.
I pressed on. “Don’t get me wrong, that was hardly it, but it was that final drop of oil that sparked the great conflagration, so to speak.”(2)
“And what became of these bloodthirsty and short-sighted commoners?” Luna asked in a voice almost as dark as the area.
“They won, and killed the entire royal line down to the last bastard thrice removed.” I paused for a moment as Luna choked on her own spit. “Then with the illusion of royal birth being anything special thoroughly shattered… quite a few other countries soon erupted into similar revolutions.”
The entire area was all but deathly silent for nearly five minutes, before I continued. “Granted, quite a few lineages remain… but the ones that actually hold any power except through reputation are so few you can all but ignore them. My own homeland has a rather popular King, for example, but ol’ ‘Karl Gutta’ is basically a diplomat that inherited his position. All the actual power lies with a democratically elected parliament.”
I couldn't quite stop myself from giving the still mare a rather predatory grin in the dark. “Does my rather blatant disregard for that fancy hat suddenly make this horrific sense… Your Highness?”
Luna did seemingly not approve one iota of my mirth, given how thin a line her mouth was. “You approve of such… slaughter?”
I shrugged and waved her off. “Several centuries before my time. I won’t deny that it was horrific, and quite a few probably died that didn't deserve it… but in the end th- my world ended up a better place for it.”
“How can you be this… callous of an entire line... ending?”
I raised my arm and made a chopping motion with my other hand. “If your arm is gangrenous you cut it off. Sure, some healthy flesh probably goes with it, but it’s much better than dying.” I decided that a certain winged unicorn wasn't quite likely to gut me quite yet —even if she was looking quite a bit queasy— and unceremoniously sank down on the grass with my legs folded. “And believe me, the French aristocracy was a societal cancer towards the end. Grand balls while their serfs starved, and crap like that.”
I looked up towards Luna and made sure to make my eyes as hard as possible. “If you remember anything of this night… Don’t have balls during a famine. The few twits on top and their goons aren't nearly as scary as every Joe and Jane Average in a frothing frenzy, carrying pitchforks and meat hooks.” It wasn't quite the same as taking a drag of a cigarette between lines, but I still plopped my lolly in for a few moments and savored the almost lemon flavor before pressing on. “If there exist a single fortress that can stand when the entire populace decided they’d rather die than see it standing? Well, I haven’t seen it yet.”
“...I believe you underestimate Our subjects capability for mercy,” Luna said in a careful voice.
I was moments away from flinging daggers with my eyes, I’ll say that much. “Said the mare that’s here to poke me until I explode, and actually get a legal reason to drag me to the dungeons. Because three of her friends got bloody noses they actually deserved.”
Luna bristled slightly… still, it was a step up from the death-glares. “Just as I think you might have the chance of redeeming yourself, you say something like that.”
Something let out a crunch sound. I looked over to my hand, only to see the lollipop reduced to dust in my grip. I took a deep breath and let it fall in a small stream towards the ground, before turning my head back towards the idiot. “Redemption? I defended myself. Why the hell would I show remorse for using minimal force? I even tried to walk away, only for that purple idiot to grab me and drag me back!”
“And if I told you that ‘purple idiot’ might need months, if not years, of surgeries and rehabilitation before she can fly again? The only reason she lives, being that she earned those very wings a few short months ago?”
I leaned my head back and did my best not to scream in frustration. “Ma’am… What happened was an utter, utter waste, but I don’t have a time-machine in my pocket.”
At least I damn-well hoped not. I wasn't quite certain what that amulet of mine was actually capable of, but even if it was ‘just’ what it was in the books with a few extras?
Knowledge is a dangerous, dangerous thing.
I leaned my head down again and decided on a bit of reversal. “Fine, let me hear what you would have done, then.” I snapped my fingers, and above us a hole in the air opened up.
A hole that a screaming Luna whose wings wouldn't quite catch the air had just fallen through.
The ‘real’ Luna let out a snort. “I do not scream like a tiny filly.”
I gave her a level look… before the imaginary Luna’s voice shifted to a deep, manly baritone.
Luna’s eye twitched slightly. “I have met three creatures more abrasive than you, wizard... and one of them was Discord himself.”
I ignored her. “Here is the scenario for our little thought exercise. What you thought was just a nice looking bit of bling has turned out to have a —to your knowledge— one way trip to another world on it. Three locals, of a culture and people you know nothing about except that they give off more magic each than quite a few places of power in your home, basically jump you and then ask you to just hand over the thing that dropped you straight on top of them.”
In the distance, the dream Luna landed in a rather graceless heap, just between three humans threateningly brandishing baseball bats.
“What do you do, oh wise mistress of the night?”
Luna raised a hoof and massaged her temples in a rather distractingly human fashion. “Is the constant attitude and sarcasm really necessary?”
“I don’t like or fear you nearly enough to force myself to stop... so yes.”
Luna did that breathing exercise again before speaking. “Fine, I use my wings and fly off.”
I gave her a long, tired look... and then flapped my arms for emphasis.
Luna let out a sigh. “Point taken…”
“Oh, and the entire magic field is different and seemingly follow some quite important different rules, so you don’t actually know what any of your gear or spells will do until you try.”
It was a bit cruel, but I made the imaginary Luna lower her head and let out what should have been one of those stun-blasts…
Only for the still glowing bones of the human she’d been pointing her horn at to fall down in a small rain of ash.
I ‘paused’ the image at the distraught face of Luna, as the two survivors fled the scene screaming.
The real Luna was looking a bit green again. “You have a sick and twisted imagination.”
I just let out a snort. “That isn't that different from my rings having gotten a full charge from nowhere, and you know it.”
I drew a star superimposed over another in the air, with my finger leaving dark pink and white lines of light behind that flowed together into glimmering fields when I was done. I poked the air, and five smaller stars glimmered to life.
Then a rainbow colored lightning-bolt shooting forward from a blue lined but white cloud.
And finally, three balloons, one pink and two blue.
“You just don’t want to admit it, because it means those three friends of yours dropped the ball big-time,” I said.
I drew a fourth time. Three pink butterflies with blue bodies, caught mid-flight in the air as if it had turned to amber.
“And the rather unfortunate fact that one of them didn't. The other’s simply didn't listen to her council.”
I turned to Luna, whose face was just utterly unreadable… but she did stare at the pictures I’d improvised. “Well?” I asked softly. “Ball’s in your court. What are you going to do with it?”
Judging from how Luna fell silent, she had some thinking to do.
I just leaned back onto the soft grass, and watched the stars falling.
Luna seemed rather annoyed as I plucked another lollipop from thin-air. “Would you stop that?!”
Let’s say the taste of blueberries wasn't the only reason I was smiling wide. “Rather hard to take a grown man that likes lollies seriously, isn't it?”
Luna grumbled something rather unladylike sounding under her breath, before turning slightly and going back to thinking.
My mind had wandered far enough by the time she spoke up that I was contemplating dreaming falling asleep just to see Luna’s reaction. “And if I order you to the castle until I am certain you can be trusted?”
I took the lolly out of my mouth and willed it full-sized again as I rolled it between my fingers. “Sorry, but I've got prior engagements for the foreseeable future. Rain check, perhaps?”
Luna’s horn lit in a way I’m certain was meant to be intimidating. “And if I insist?”
“I believe I would need to tell you to go do something rather distressing to your mother on principle.” As Luna glared down at me again I just rolled my eyes. “Lady, I actually know roughly four things about you, and I have even less facts concerning your sister. Given that two of these thing I know is that you're almost as foul tempered as I am when pissed, and that the people I tangled with in Ponyville are apparently buddies of yours, there really isn't a single rational reason I should risk meeting you or yours physically until I’m damn sure this debacle is done and over with.”
Her ears flickered in annoyance, but it seemed clear Luna didn't actually have an argument against my logic. “And the other two things…?”
“You’re apparently a big enough deal around here that people either believe the bullshit you’re sprouting… or that ‘Queen of the Night’ shtick actually has some freakin merit and that would make you the second scariest person I've ever met.” I spat the empty stick into the dark. “Either way, I don’t see any way tangling with you would end well… especially not in conjecture with fact number four.”
“...And that fourth thing is?” Luna asked with barely withheld annoyance.
I gave her a weary look. “You and I have something in common. And it isn't a good thing at that.”
“And that would be what, little wizard?”
“Neither of us are the bowing type.” I remembered slash conjured my little ball of sunshine over my outstretched palm; the light from the small fire-ball lighting the field with a clear, yellow light. “Call me cynical, but I don’t think that fight would be the catalyst to bring out the best in either of us.” I waved my hand quickly through the fire-ball, plunging the place into darkness once more.
Ever had one of those dreams where you just know something? Well, with the certainty of such dream-logic, I know my eyes caught what little light there was oddly when I looked towards Luna. One of those nearly predatory gleams. “I know I am not a nice man when the chips are on the table… but I've managed to keep that dark streak slumbering throughout the years.” I closed my eyes and shuddered slightly. For as long as I could remembered I've had something of a hot-headed streak, and a problem with realizing when it was time to stop…
But that was before I know some of the stuff I now know.
Fires no water may put out, even as they cling...
Winds that blow so cruelly they tear away the very skin…
Storms, called and wiped to a frenzy, until the lightning falls like rain...
The Darkhallow.
Oh God, the Darkhallow.
And there was a part of me… that didn't seem to be that worried if this little debacle went even that far.
“...I’m honestly not certain where my limits are at the moment,” I said in a low voice, half to myself, “and that frankly scares the hell out of me.” I turned my head and refocused on Luna. “One person that would fight the tide given the right incentive to another… please don’t make me find those limits.”
Luna closed her eyes… and I am unsure if it was the lightning, the dream, my imagination, or all those at the same time... but for just the tiniest of moments she was just one shadow among many.
Then she shuddered, and the blue mare stood there once more in the gloom.
“‘tis stronger to always rise, I've heard,” I said softly, “but call me a coward if you must, because I think I’d prefer to never fall.”
To my surprise, Luna actually turned her back on me. “One chance, wizard… and I’ll be keeping a very close eye on the report from the guard.” She turned her head back over her… well, back, and gave me a warning glare. “If I see any reports that say ‘spindly minotaur thing’ or human on them there better be a good reason for it... or you will see me and my sister in our full glory.”
My heart jumped a few beats, but I kept the poker-face going. Could this actually be the end of this damn feud?
...Given whose luck in such matters I’d seemed to have gained as well as the face of… I didn't really feel like betting on it, but I’d give it shot at least. “Doom of Damocles, huh? Fine, but I hope that may be re-negotiated with enough time of me not getting in trouble.”
A man may dream even the utterly improbable, yes?
Luna looked puzzled at the reference for a moment, but just shrugged it off. “Forgive me if I’m not holding my breath. You and your information may be quite the prize… but you’ll be just as big a treasure trove of new knowledge in a nicely warded cell with frequent visits of a counselor.”
I bit back a retort, deciding that right now was not quite the time to push buttons. “Duly noted, Ma’am.”
She tilted her head, clearly not certain if I was being sincere or not. “Oh, and just how did you enter Canterlot?”
I felt quite a big pang of irritation at that. “I walked up to the gates, and filled out the form.” I wiggled both hands high in the air. “Behold! The dark sorcery of bureaucracy!”
Of course I throw my head back and gave off my best cackle after that line. Did you really even need to ask?
Luna narrowed her eyes at me, a stern and unamused expression on her face as she glared my way.
I just rolled my eyes. “It’s almost as if I can actually act civilized when not feeling hounded, or something.” I pulled down my hat over my eyes and folded my hands beneath my head, just to make it crystal clear I considered this thing over. “Now buzz off and let me sleep, before I make it rain cybernetic raptors with laser eyes and lightsaber claws.”
Luna let out a slow breath and I heard her turn. “Is this how you reward getting another chance?”
“No, this is how I react to a ruler who doesn't even seem to blink at performing what’s considered not only a utterly beyond the pale privacy invasion where I’m from, but also a type of torture and plays fucking favorites.” I tipped my hat slightly back and shot the overgrown filly a glare. “Or am I really supposed to believe you've never done this ‘you don’t get to sleep until you see reason’ crap before?”
To my considerable surprise… Luna actually seemed to take the words seriously, judging from her somber tone and expression. “So what would you do then? Should I close my eyes when I see a teacher that dreams vividly of their students, instead of pushing them to seek the counsel of a psychologist? When a young mage dreams of raining fire and thunder down on tormentors… I should do nothing?”
I swear, if there is anything more annoying than feeling tired in your own dreams I have yet to experience it. I reached up to rub the bridge of my nose…
Only to hesitate as I felt the touch of warm metal against my skin. I just had to lift my hand and stare for a few moments on the fingers near covered in my force rings I hadn't even realized I’d kept when I switched out my gear for this illusionist’s outfit.
“...With great power, comes great responsibility, I guess…” I mumbled, as I rested the hand on my chest.
Luna seemed to find that amusing. “I shall admit, I did not expect to hear that line.”
I raised an eyebrow at that. “Seriously? This world has a take on Spider-man?”
“Spider-mare.”
I swatted myself gentle on the forehead. “Of course.” I couldn't quite stop myself from barking out a laugh. “Was always more of a Doctor Strange fan, myself.”
I did not like the gleam in Luna’s eyes when she titled her head at me. “Oh? An earth pony that lost her talent… but gained magic instead? It sounds as if some rather interesting parallels could be read in that, don’t you agree?”
I all but immediately upgraded Luna from ‘Decently Dangerous Annoyance’ to ‘Avoid At All Costs.’ She might have a temper and I still wasn't quite certain what that Nightmare Moon thing was all about... but there most certainly wasn't anything wrong with that brain of hers.
Brains, magic and just a bit of ruthlessness? Dangerous combo, that one.
I barely fought down a small chuckle. Know thyself, and all that…
Must admit, those gleaming cyber raptors were sounding better by the minute. Still, I decided to at least try the more diplomatic solution. “Don’t you have people that can’t ‘twist dreams like a pegasus flies’ whose bad dreams need a good bashing to attend to…?”
I have to admit, my opinion of the mare shot-up quite a bit when that small jab about her duties going unfulfilled actually made Luna twitch more than most of the insults I’d been throwing her way all night had.
“Remember, wizard,” Luna said, as she turned and walked away; the shadows all but washing over her like a cresting wave, “one chance and you will be watched.”
I put my hand to my mouth and shouted after her. “Hey, I have a freakin’ name, you know!”
I couldn't see Luna any more, but a somewhat distant sounding snort made it to my ears. “Several from what I've heard. You actually show enough courage to use one of your real ones and I might actually use it.”
My eyebrow twitched as a rather strong pang of irritation passed over me. “I’m sorry, Luna, I didn't quite catch that… Would the self-proclaimed moon goddess please repeat that for us brief mortals?”
A single echo-y snort… and then this rather subtle but near all-encompassing presence faded.
“Flippin’ finally…” I muttered as I leaned my head back.
Only to involuntarily growl as I spotted a certain something in the sky...
“Luna, actually fuck off, or I’ll punch you straight in the totem.”
The big, glowing full-moon didn't react in any way.
So I put two fingers into my mouth, and let out a wolf whistle. “Sue! Come girl! Come here!”
I couldn't stop myself from chuckling as the ground started shaking slightly.
Thump.
Thump.
Thump.
Like something gigantic was coming ever closer.
My suspicions about a certain celestial object were confirmed when Luna’s ugly and rather shocked looking mug appeared on the moon’s surface, staring at something off in the distance. “WHAT MANNER OF ABOMINATION IS THAT?!”
The abomination in question came stomping over a nearby hill; outlined in this blackish green aura of wrongness, spilling both blood and feathers in her wake as Sue the undead T-Rex came stomping towards me.
As the thing towered over me, I reached a hand up. Obediently, Sue lowered her massive head so I could scratch her on her chin; the smooth white feathers flowing between my fingers as I gave her a good scratch.
“Sue?”
The T-Rex in question roared so loud that the air rippled slightly.
With a grin so wide it frankly should have made the top of my head fall off, I pointed to the moon. “Fetch!”
In defiance of near every law of physics and good taste, Sue jumped. The several ton beast just tensed for a single moment, before pushing off and sailing through the air towards Luna who was currently doing a rather satisfying jaw drop.
I wasn't certain if this was some manner of ‘shard’ not strong enough to fight such an overt bop on the nose, or the real Luna proper having fallen into a rather understandable panic… but seeing the moon run screaming back and forth over the heavens with an undead T-Rex in hot pursuit?
I chuckled and rubbed my hands together, as a steaming bag of popcorn popped into existence next to me. Ye gods, I do so love this magic thing!
Still… I had to admit this was a rather poor start to a truce even by ‘Dresden’ standards.
So rather reluctantly I raised my hand and snapped my fingers, making Sue explode into a shower of butterflies mid roar.
Luna, however much or little it really was of her, stopped her moon so suddenly I actually heard this cartoony skidding sound that made my teeth ache.
Then she looked down, with a glare so nasty it actually lit my top-hat on fire.
I absently patted the flames out with a hand. “Please? Before things turn unpleasant again?”
Luna shifted her glare to the swarm of butterflies, causing this rather distressing light-show of tiny falling fireballs I frankly wasn't certain how to feel about. “And calling undead abominations is what, exactly…?” she asked in an icy voice.
I let out a snort and pulled my hat over my eyes. “That bit of grizzly unoriginality? Please, it was only a mental love-tap and you know it. Now please go away and bother somepony that actually appreciates it.”
I just had to sigh as Mt. Big-Blue-Butt exploded at me again; making my ears ache and the grass all around me lay down flat. “BOTHER?! BOTHER?! MY DREAMS ARE NOT A FLIPPING BOTHER!”
I pressed my hat down a bit harder with another sigh. “Fuck it, I’m going deeper.”
Then ignoring Luna’s ranting… I leaned my head back, and dreamed that I fell asleep.
I ‘came to’ sitting in a deckchair on a tropical beach, wearing only a pair of bathing shorts, a tricorne because it amused me, and a huge grin. With a content sigh I leaned back with my hands behind my neck, and just took in the waves and the warm breeze…
My content mood lasted all but five seconds before moon-rise that somehow managed to look angry came gliding over the horizon.
“You did not just go recursive on me! Do you have any idea what an utter headache that is?!”
I turned my head, only to see a scowling Luna in a deckchair of her own that had seemingly appeared together with its mistress from thin air. Still… “So you're saying me dreaming I’m dreaming is a bigger irritation than being hunted by undead dinosaurs?” I asked innocently with a small smile on.
Luna made a face of horror as she realized her mistake. “Don’t you dare!” she commanded, hoof jabbing angrily my way.
With a big grin I pulled my hat down over my eyes again.
I just barely had time to hear an angry inhale before I reopened my eyes to the sight of a desolate mountain top this time. I pulled down the fedora on my head and swept my duster a bit tighter against the raging winds, but I had to admit my subconscious had outdone itself on the view. This gorgeous dusk with stars slowly winking alight as the sky slowly darkened, all while clouds colored various shades of deep purple and fiery orange raced across the sky.
I chuckled softly and plucked a new lollipop from the frozen air; twirling it between my fingers as another moon-rise started rising over the lower-peaks. “This night just might turn out somewhat entertaining anyway…”
1,) Swedish. Literally: “...And thank the gods for that.”
2,) Note from the editor, Xanathar: It's just an historical anecdote with questionable validity that apparently happened several decades before the French Revolution, but poor Luna doesn't knows this. In fact, there is no historical proof that Queen Marie Antoinette said the words at all.
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BEST CHAPTER EVAR!!!!!!!
This chapter made my day!!!!
This chapter was amazing. Bjord and Luna's dream fight, along with their differing worldviews, made for an interesting read. I got to admit that the part with Sue and the Inception dreams made me laugh. I cant wait for the next chapter or chapter 3.5
Wonderful chapter and a delight to read. I can also just imagine Dresden and Luna (because my keyboard doesn't have the fancy accent keys) being at each other's throats... then ending up: "Yeah I punched him in the face, now we're friends" style of bonding.
I can't wait for the next chapter.
So I'm still confused on exactly what's going on with him.
Is he the real Harry Dresden, some random dude with his powers and mind suddenly thrust inside of him out of nowhere, or someone who learned the same exact spells as Dresden somehow, and is pulling things from Dresden's life because he can?
Does that mean what I think it means?
thought should be taught.
Hehehehe. Depending on Luna's origins, she might have even invented dream-walking.
Huh. Interesting. I wonder what method Luna uses for dream manipulation? I guess she doesn't directly alter anything, and mainly attacks hostile entities causing nightmares. That and directly interacting with ponies who have psycological problems.
Never imagined she would have an issue with direct dream alteration.
True that. At least in some situations. Power and actually using it tend to be a bit of a mess.
Also, I would note that in the case of, say, the Queens of Faerie in the Dresden Files, the Queen's power isn't really as high as implied. Any and all restrictions on power usage reduce the actual power of that entity. The Queens of Faerie have tons of restrictions, and although they might have raw physical (well, metaphysical) power to throw around in their domains, it is mostly through political manipulation that they have the ability to actually accomplish anything.
Yoda Much?
Too True. In most battles, of any type, multiple approaches of attack reduce the enemy's ability to counter all of them. More resources must be expended to defend, and more chance of a breakthrough.
Also, Kinetic weapons are just better. Especially when it comes to magic resistance.
I want a picture of something like this.
I don't really like the idea that ponies end up having no combat knowledge whatsoever, at least when that extends to guards and the Elements. The Guards should know how to fight at least.
There is more than combat to everything, sure, but combat is pretty much the bare minimum of anything. Well, that and the few other basic needs of life. As in, using something to get food and shelter. Shelter being protection from the Elements(as in nature) and potentially hostile entities. Most things are created as a weapon first. And even if not it isn't really hard to adapt it to such. You just don't disregard that.
Still, when you base a story on My Little Pony, so long as you take canon at face value, like 99% of people, as opposed to assuming it to be rose tinted, then this is understandable.
Still Frustrating.
Yep, That is a valid form of attack. And at debatable evil. Dream magic at the very least is probably technically a violation of The Third Law of Magic. Fortunate that Equestria doesn't seem to run on the same rules. Otherwise Twilight would have gone warlock by now.
Not sure where the idea that Gems act as magical defences without being used to create, say, wards, came from.
Still think you have the lyrics wrong.
best method of all to cleanse a place. Irritate every entity trying to enter to the point where they give up and leave. Wonder if the irritation effect persists in the circle....
Huh. I wonder if that would be effective. If Luna knew how the defense worked, she might be able to bypass it. However, she might not. Regardless it would probably shatter her if she discovered ponies putting up such defenses.
Considering the rituals I've seen in the Dresdenverse, this seems plausible. First book's heart-tear-out ritual had two lovers powering it. Admittedly, you would need a mana-battery in all likelyhood unless actively using the power in the same way. I doubt you could effectively give yourself a permanent power boost, but it would probably give a boost so long as you were known and loved.
This is what I like about the Dresden files. Dresden tends to mouth off to god-like beings. In a lot of cases they also deserve it. Most god-like beings are massively arrogant, and somehow disapprove of mortals with similar opinions. Most are assholes, and as long as you can survive against their power, giving them respect is not something they deserve. Well, unless you are manipulating them. but that is besides the point.
Dresden doesn't really respect them most of the time, unless really necessary. And although the god-likes Dresdenverse Dresden deals with tend not to have anything resembling Human morality, even if they did he isn't going to accept anything unjust in his eyes. Luna here has that kind of self-importance delusion, and that kind of thing pisses me off. It makes them little more that bullies. (Admittedly there are things to be said for using power to control others)
Love it when people technically follow instructions in a way to infuriate others.
huh. Who was the first? The Comicon guy who gave him the Amulet? Or maybe his mother?
Oh look! Hes becoming more like Harry "I swear officer, the Building was on fire when I got here' Dresden every day!
I felt quite a big pang of irritation at that. “I walked up to the gates, and filled out the form.” I wiggled both hands high in the air. “Behold! The dark sorcery of bureaucracy!”
"Bureaucromancer" Snort. Guess he isn't much like Dresden at all.
huh. I want to see a picture of those too.
Well, Earth analogs are common, so that isn't surprising. Still a bit disturbing
Best moment of the chapter. I had to stop to regain breath after cackling.
Half expected Sue to end up treating the moon as a fire hydrant.
Needs the Benny Hills or similar running theme.
Yea, I suppose even Dresden hasn't gone that far yet, to pretty much violate the spirit of the truth from around a minute after initiating it.
4570266 Guy loves the Dresden Files series. Dresses up as Dresden for a comicon. Meets Reality warping guy who sells him an alicorn amulet replica. gets warped to equestria. Is transformed into Dresden. Gains all Dresden's power. Is not Dresden.
Mab seems to imply that the two might meet someday. Which would be all kinds of awkward.
MORE :D this chapter was so awesome!
I'm so glad you're continuing this. Harry Dresden cosplay + bestprincess = nothing but win sauce.
Oh man, This chapter is amazing!
Also i Hope Dresden meets Discord.
Awesome chapter! I hope to see the next update soon!
4570322 Not the Alicorn Amulet, a copy of Harry's pentacle amulet, complete with gem.
Awesome chapter.
4570702 Harry's Pentical, WIth a red gem similar to the Alicorn amulet in the center, which twilight recognized as a replica of such. It might not actually be an Alicorn amulet analog.
Quite glad I stumbled across this bit of work here, keep up the food work lads.
Also, the sheer amounts of YESH for this story is unfathomable.
Awesome!
You keep this up and this story is going to be one of my all time favorites.
By the gods, I love this fic. Keep up the great work.
Another fantastic chapter. I enjoyed reading about "Harry" and Luna interacting.
Oh wow, the dream shenanigans are amazing. I really enjoy how those two bounce off of each-other. Immovable object and unstoppable force much?
Also, you really should have the guy speak some more Swedish. I don't understand a word of it, but it's funny nonetheless.
It's his mind, therefore it's HIS domain. There, he is God, and Luna's just a gnat he hasn't squashed yet.
Think you mean thorn.
Should be stare and into
You forgot to mention that many humans actually train themselves to manipulate their own dreams(Dresden-"What, you've never heard of lucid dreaming?") ....
And actually succeed.... 
And they don't have a lick of magic to do it!!! That'll probably give her an aneurysm. 
Damn! Just need to say Thanks for Writing, this story is top notch and very well written! I'll be waiting with baited breath for the next chapter.
P.s. I'm posting this comment after the Third read through of the newest chapter
This is among the funniest thing I've ever read
Can't wait for more.
Hrrm. I really hope this is not an example of why the "cosplayer into Equestria" story type is so popular... I like Dresden, and this guy is way angrier than Dresden is... or rather, as angry as Dresden can be, but ALL the time! Even Dresden apologizes when he realizes he's gone too far, especially when he harms innocents. And by now, Bjorn (if he even thinks of himself that way anymore) should have realized that even in self-defense he at least owes those he has wronged an apology.
Also, after Dresden's dealings with Mab? You would think that the dude would know better than to mouth off at Immortal Royalty!
Ugh. I like flawed characters as much as the next writer, but... I don't think I can follow this story anymore. "Polite-when-he-feels-like-it Combative Know-it-all Jerk" just doesn't work for me. You kids enjoy.
4587661
Sorry to hear that, but thanks for the feedback and giving the fic a chance.
I've done my best to keep Björn distinct (if a similar type of character) from Dresden, and the worse temper is one of those things. I realize your mind may already be made up, but if it makes any difference I know the story so far has been very 'action-action-action' and intend to have the next chapter or thereabout be a breather with quite a bit of character and world-building.
Still, once more thanks for the try and feedback.
4588937 You can't see me, but I'm shaking my head.
I appreciate the response! Honestly, I wasn't sure what kind of response I was expecting, but polite and friendly wasn't very high on the table of probability, let alone polite and friendly from the author himself. I appreciate integrity like that, so thank you for taking the time!
Now, as far as my comment goes... well, please don't take that as feedback! That was more of an emotional, off-the-cuff bit of whining because the story wasn't meshing with me, and it's sort of embarrassing that it wrought a personal reply!
Here's some real, constructive feedback:
Your descriptions and action scenes are top notch. They describe as vividly as necessary without actually calling attention to themselves, merging very well with the flow of the narrative. I also like some of the decisions you made in world-building Equestria - first time I've seen a meat-eating Rarity for a decently plausible reason, as well as the culture of folks entering a big capital city like Canterlot. And of course, Bjorn's command of magic is fascinating to watch!
Things I've noticed:
> There is a LOT of focus on dialogue, I've noticed. I haven't read any other cosplayers-in-Equestria fics so I can't say for them, but this fic seems to have run so far almost entirely on the strength of verbal character interactions. Admittedly, there's a lot of this in The Dresden Files too, but that was the big weakness of the series: how bulky and awkwardly the info dumps were inserted into dialogue. I wouldn't say it's a problem per se, except for my having noticed it, which indicates that the quality of the dialogue has brought at least one reader "out of the story".
> You've pinged me on the idea that there might be character building in the next few chapters, because that's one of TWO things I have not seen a hint of since chapter one: Hints of progression of character, and hints of progression of plot. Maybe I'm not looking hard enough? But so far what I've seen has been Bjorn just sort of... surviving in Equestria, with very little rhyme or reason to his traveling decisions, and apparently not interested in actively searching for a way home. Nothing overt, at any rate. In other words, Bjorn right now feels like a very passive character who wanders around without direction and loses his temper when he bumps into something who reacts even remotely hostilely to his appearance/presence. It's hard to like a story, let alone a character, based around a series of reaction-action narrative beats, you know?
> Right now, it's hard to tell in the narrative where Bjorn the cosplayer ends and the mantle of Harry Dresden, Wizard of the White Council begins. Is this deliberate? Is Bjorn losing his self-identity to the role he's been transformed into? If so, bravo! The narrative is as confused as the narrator! If not... maybe you should look into that!
There, now that was feedback. Thanks again for taking the time to respond, and good luck with the story! I'll be back for that character/world-building you promised.
I ADORE this story.
While I have read a few of the Dresden Files books, I never really liked them but i did love the world and magic of the place.
What really impressed me is two things.
First is your main character, how he is a perfect blend of OC and Harry making him an incredibly interesting read (I even like him more than Cannon Harry). Plus for once the main character is happy being taken to a magical world and given super powers. I never understood why so many character complain that 'their life is hell', when they're transported to a land full of unmatched wonders and are granted magical abilities that put them on part with Merlin. Dear god, their life is so terrible
Second, is your world building. You made a perfect blend of Dresden Files and MLP universe that I absolutely adore. I cannot imagine how you thought of it but you made the greatest version of the mlp universe I have ever seen, and that's without changing any fact from cannon.
Keep up the great work, this story has already become among my top three mlp fanfic and it has barely even started
.
Can't wait to see what happens next.
4572364
Thank you!
Fixed 'em.
4538196 awesome. So what, a wizard just has more innate magic and a natural focus? Theoretically, a mortal could do everything they do if they had a powerful enough focus and access to enough magic? Also, I'd like the list of things that can't stand circles please.
4570266 he's a random dude with Dresden's powers and appearance, who has read the books.
4570702 he meant a replica in its magic.
4573578 huh. I must have been reading too fast, was there anything more indepth that "She gets her metaphorical panties in a twist whenever someone with different views on dreams comes to town"?
4573820 well, in Dresden files, everyone has SOME magic, the difference between wizards and mortals is that wizards have a LOT more and an innate ability to focus it. Mortals are known to be able to use the most basic spell in creation: Circles of Power. They not only have to draw it, they need some of their blood for it. A real wizard can just focus on a circle to make one.
4578824 yes you can.
4587661 but he doesn't. Not in this situation. He did everything he could, the rest was on them.
4732865 ...Has the show which this entire website is based around taught you nothing? There is always room to be gracious, and apologizing first is not only the mark of one who is strong in spirit, but also aware that it takes two to start a fight.
Bjorn has plenty to apologize for. There are many, MANY ways that first contact could have gone down, and he didn't have the self-control to find a less violent road. "Did everything he could" my foot.
4737544 he was plenty gracious. He didn't kill anyone. And unless you forgot, they attacked him.
4737748 "plenty gracious." ... "didn't kill anyone."
...I'm starting to think you're just a troll. Why are you even going back through the comments and randomly responding to anyone and everything?
"Attacked" is a very strong word for Rainbow Dash being Rainbow Dash. And further, if you'll think back to the Dresden series, remember in White Night, when the original recipe Dresden slagged a trashcan and several storefronts when Molly pissed him off? And then afterwards when they went back to the hospital and Murphy reminded him that magic doesn't work if he doesn't believe in it, and evidently he believed it was okay to vent fire on public property just because he was angry? The same applies here.
Out of all the ways Bjorn could have reacted, instead of talking things through or even just running to avoid the problem, he chose to use magic to first play with, then threaten Rainbow Dash. These choices ultimately lead to his confrontation with the Mane6 who were still in town.
Bjorn isn't meant to be a sympathetic character. He's meant to be a jerk. Don't defend actions that were specifically designed to be antagonistic.
4741402 I get bored. And you and I both know those are two completely different situations. she attacked him.She can fly at supersonic speeds. And he did try to talk, he tried to walk away. But the only one with enough sense to actually leave him alone was(surprisingly) Pinkie Pie. He didn't actually hurt Rainbow until the THIRD time. Considering he can now kill with a word, that takes a lot of self control. Besides, it's not like he demanded her soul.
Oh well if you're just bored then I needn't waste another breath.
It's pretty obvious neither of us are going to budge on our respective stances anyways.
4743385 I will point out this is for the League of Humans Acting Villainous. I expect at least a little dickery. Bjorn isn't there to play nice like Dresden.
Though I do also wish it was actually the real Dresden, personality and all going on this crazy trip. It's like wanting to get a bottle of Coca-Cola, but the only thing you can get is the off brand Koka-Kola. It might remind you of the original, an might even taste good in it's own right, but it's still not Coca-Cola.
4743275
4743385
4751056
This. I'm trying very hard to balance things out so everything feels logical and in-character... but as he said himself, Björn is not a nice man.
I'm actually going for the vibe: What if Nightmare Moon didn't get a rainbow scrubbing, but had to learn to live with what a bastard she is deep down? Just gender-flipped and from a low-magic world.
The heat is still stopping me from writing, sadly, but there's going to be quite a bit about just that in the coming chapter.
I actually have to admit, I've been feeling slightly guilty about just that. There is so few MLP/Dresden crossovers despite what a wonderful combo those two are... and here I am, getting praised for my 'Brand X' of that concept.
In fact, I've even flirted mentally with going back to the initial concept for Horse Feathers in a spin-off. The one that WASN'T a LoHAV type fic.
Sadly, there's one rather decently sized spoiler in that draft I plan on reusing for this story, so I can't share it yet. Otherwise I would have given how things have stalled right now.
4759418 'Eeeeeeeeeey, No worries man. Just keep doing what you're doing.
If you mess up too bad we'll be sure to leave all sorts of nasty comments complaining about what you did without actually offering any critiques to let you know where you could improve the story.
4803755
Actually, both 'Vanto' and 'Ventas' show up in the books, and they both seem to be the exact same spell.
Since it's such a subtle difference I'm honestly not sure if it is intentional on Harry's slash Butcher's part, or just a typo that never got nixed.
I went with 'Vento' since I personally think it sounds (slightly) better.
And for the rings, the command word is the 'proper' way of doing it... but since Harry consider the force rings something of a back-up the slight loss of efficiency in just more or less willing them to fire makes up for it by being faster. Like firing a gun from the hip, instead of aiming properly, basically.
Can't blame you for not remembering the last one, though. I think Harry has actually used that command word one or two times in the entire series.
If it helps, here's my source on this type of stuff. Link to the same.
Even if you still disagree, I hope this answer tells you at least that there is a method to the madness.
4803819 hmm, guess your right. on the other hand, loved sue chasing the moon. that was funny.
You sir have not written enough of this. I can NOT get enough of two of my favorite things here, 1) The Arcane, and 2) Hilarity.