• Member Since 21st Feb, 2013
  • offline last seen Sep 20th, 2015

TempesttheDragnix


E

Twilight is walking through the Everfree forest when she stumbles across a dark cave. She meets a strange entity that only shows itself as a voice and a pair of eyes. She's scared by the situation, but the voice seems so lonely, so gentle. It certainly wouldn't hurt her. Right?
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Warning: Shameless hypnofic. If you're not into that kind of thing, don't read.
And to everyone who favorited this, thanks! And sorry I didn't get to thank you all personally.

Chapters (1)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 24 )

I would like more of this please.

It has potential, though it was a bit of a fast induction. That's personal preference, mostly, seeing that I like slow inductions more than the fast ones. Anyway, you should keep this up, I like it.

interesting, feels more like an introduction then a full story though... let's see some 'playtime'!

This feels more like a chapter one than a chapter only. Still, it was VERY much relevant to my interests. I'd like to see you continue this sometime. Maybe have Twilight bring some of her friends to meet the Voice.

Anyways, thanks for this. It was a short, but fun read.

Induction or explanation for how she falls for this is nonexistent. Otherwise its hard to argue with hypnofic.

So many favorites and comments! :raritystarry: Thank you, guys.

3983130
3983168
Squee! People are asking for mo-
*looks around and blushes*
Ahem. Will work on it.


3983192
3984657
Yeah, that's a little problem I'm currently trying to fix. But hey, it's a magical induction, so it has a little bit of an excuse.


3984101
3983533
Why do people think this is the only chapter?
Oh, wait, I marked it complete. Sorry for that. Will be working on more!

Pretty sure you can change it back to incomplete somehow.

This was well-written, I liked it!
It was so quick though, what a cruel tease!
:raritywink:

Hmmm, if you do more, I wonder if the Voice will ever want to gather more ponies...?
Anyways, totally keep on writing, you've got my fav!
:twilightsmile:

3995310

Hmmm, if you do more, I wonder if the Voice will ever want to gather more ponies...?

Maybe. After all, the more toys the merrier!

I wish this wasn't a one-shot :raritycry:

4006458
Don't worry, if I can get off my lazy butt, it won't be.

4006458
3995310
3983533
3983130
3983168
3984101
3983192
3984657

*Clears throat*
I AM KEEPING THIS AS A ONE-SHOT.

Why? Because all of last week I sat at my computer for about five hours a day trying to write the next chapter and got NOTHING. I didn't plan any scenes, couldn't get the intro to the second chapter right, failed to find a way to make it anything but a longer copy of this with more hijinks, and didn't even come up with a decent idea for how it would play out.

So instead of making a new chapter, I'm simply redoing this one. I'm making it longer, adding more stuff, fixing the fast induction problem, and leaving off the thing at the end about Twi coming back. If you aren't happy with that, then don't get mad at me, get mad at my stupid lack of inspiration.
The redone version should be done in about a week (though knowing me, that means you should expect it in a month).

Thank you. *Pulls up Microsoft Word* Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a story to redo.

4095661
Hey, that's cool man. I'll take a high quality one-shot over a half-baked multi-chapter fic any day.
Thanks for keeping us updated on your plans, and good luck with your revisions!
:twilightsmile:

4103254
:pinkiesmile: Thanks for the 'good luck'.

Also, EDITING STORIES MULTIPLE TIMES FTW!

Can you make a non-clop sequel

4700481 Umm, maybe? I don't really do sequels that well. I will if I can though.

4716196 That's odd. So...you don't recall saying this?

I AM KEEPING THIS AS A ONE-SHOT. Why? Because all of last week I sat at my computer for about five hours a day trying to write the next chapter and got NOTHING. I didn't plan any scenes, couldn't get the intro to the second chapter right, failed to find a way to make it anything but a longer copy of this with more hijinks, and didn't even come up with a decent idea for how it would play out.

You also said:

So instead of making a new chapter, I'm simply redoing this one. I'm making it longer, adding more stuff, fixing the fast induction problem, and leaving off the thing at the end about Twi coming back.

Did you get any of that done, by the way?

Please do some thing more to this wether a sequal or redo, I persanuly don't care so long as it has more to it.

5623582 I gave him some ideas so I hope they are of use.

I love this and I think Voice was Sombra...
That's at least what I think
Night

Alas, there shall never be a sequel to this, even if the writer weren't on such a long absence.

Only one choice, then - make something based off of it!

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!