• Published 18th Mar 2014
  • 3,188 Views, 90 Comments

All That Remains - Draconian Soul



While my friends withered away, one remained, one that is near and dear to my heart. I know I will lose her eventually too. The chances are, I'll lose her really soon. But until that faithful day, I'll enjoy every moment with her.

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Her Request

The waiter poured the tea into Rarity’s small cup, smiling warmly at her.

“And what would you like this morning, young lady?” he asked, lowering his head out of respect for her.

Rarity giggled, waving her hoof around. "Oh, you flatter me. I know that I'm past my prime."

"You? Past your prime? You could have fooled me!"

The two continued their conversation, and I just sat there, claw on my chin. I envied his ability to go on like normal, talking to her as if she was young and not a fragile old lady.

"But I've held you two for too long," he said, smiling widely. "What would you like to eat today, ma'am?"

Rarity glanced at the menu briefly. Suddenly, her attention shifted towards me, pitting me slightly on edge.

"Spike, I'm having a difficult time deciding what I want." She lifted the menu towards my face. "What would you recommend?"

To the waiter, this was her asking for my opinion. The truth was she was trying her best to hide the fact that her vision was fading. Feigning the happiness was difficult, but I had to do it, for her.

"I think the wheat waffles with blueberries is good, and it's quite filling," I suggested.

"Well, then you have my answer. Wheat waffles with blueberries, if you don’t mind.”

The waiter jotted down the order on his pad. “Will that be all, ma’am?”

“Yes, that will be all.”

“And what about you, young man? What can get you?”

Young. The word would have been flattering under different circumstances. I cleared my throat and said, “Sorry to disappoint, but I’m not that young.”

“Really? You don’t look a day over ten! How old are you?”

I sank in my seat, frowning. I never liked giving my age to anypony. It not only was demoralizing to be seen at this height, the same baby dragon I was years and years ago, but it also hurt being reminded of the years that have gone, and the friends that I’ve lost.

“I-I’m sorry for pressing on it,” the waiter apologized. “Do you want anything, sir?”

“Just… just a blueberry muffin.” I answered.

“Spike, is that all?” Rarity asked, tapping her chin. “You normally have a bigger appetite than that.”

“I’m fine, Rarity. Just not that hungry right now.”

“Are you sure?”

I looked somberly at the table, stroking circles around the wood. Rarity frowned, staring at me with those wide, sapphire eyes. I took comfort when she nodded and turned towards the waiter.

“I think that’s all we’ll have for the day,” she said, passing the menus back towards the waiter. He bowed down to the both of us and smiled widely as if nothing had happened.

“Your meals will be out shortly. It’s a nice day to be out and about, isn’t it?”

“It is rather pleasant today,” Rarity said. “Had to drag ol’ Spikey Wikey out here today.” She went closer to the waiter and whispered into his ear. I tried to make out what they were saying, but I couldn’t. It was slightly aggravating hearing them laugh, presumably at me. For some reason, the waiter gave me a wink and then trotted off, leaving me in a state of confusion.

After he left, Rarity turned towards me and put her hooves on her chin. She looked so casual and comfortable around me, as if we’ve been doing this for years. It was like the good old days. I hate thinking about those times now.

“So Spike, how have you been?” she asked. “You come around often, but you rarely ever talk about how you’re doing.”

Because for most of the years, I’ve been sitting in my own misery, with a picture frame and a collection of photos left to keep me company. I wouldn’t dare tell her that though. She need not worry about my experiences and the tears I shedded at night, wondering when it would all end.

“I’m fine,” was all I could muster. The air went cold quickly, that awkward silence lingering. She just sat there, waiting for me to say more. But what else was there to say? Each day was the same, mundane thing. I didn’t believe I needed to bother her with the details, even if she did insist sometimes.

“Nice weather we’re having today,” she said, trying to force out a conversation. “It’s not often I get out in such pleasant weather like this. It’s just a breath of fresh air, wouldn’t you agree, Spike?”

“I suppose…”

My response was empty, much like how I felt. I twirled my fingers along the table, remaining quite. I didn’t know what to say. Should I have feigned happiness and carried on the conversation? Should I have been truthful about how I felt?

“Listen, Spike, what is wrong? You’ve been rather quiet and somber looking for the past few weeks.”

I immediately looked up at her, eyes wide. I wasn’t trying to hide my lack of emotional energy, but I didn’t think she would see through me that easily.

“Nothing’s wrong, Rarity,” I said, sighing. “Everything is just fine.”

“Well your tone isn’t too convincing. I’m not the one to dwell into anypony’s personal business but your behavior is unusual, and I won’t stop asking until you give me an answer.”

“Rarity—”

“Spike… tell me, please?” She stuck her lips out at me, trying her best to pout like she did when I was young. Her features weren’t as smooth as before, and her poking her lips out felted more forced and aged than before. It was silly to sit there as she attempted to manipulate me once again. Sadly, it worked, as always. Why does it always work?

I sighed. My cheeks reddened from her gaze, and prepared to speak my mind. “Well, I’ve just been under a lot of stress recently. I haven’t been able to sleep well recently, thinking about all the times we’ve spent with… you know.”

She nodded, staring at me with wide, observant attention. It was like she was intrigued with what I had to say, more so than I was interested in telling her what she wanted to hear.

“I’ve been feeling really under the weather lately. I… I don’t know exactly why, but I do know that I’ve had a lot of thoughts recently. Some thoughts I don’t want to worry you about.”

Rarity hummed. “And none of this has to do with your age and growth?”

She nailed part of it, which was enough to put a lump in my throat. I couldn’t respond afterwards. What she had said was the truth, the partial truth of the bigger picture. I was scared she would be able to find learn the rest of me.

“Spike, I can’t even begin to understand how it feels to be the age you are and still be that size, but you can’t let that get to you.”

That was easier said than done. Still, her words always made me smile a little.

“Besides, I kind of envy you. I wish I could be this old and keep those young looks.” She rubbed her hooves against her face to showcase her skin’s texture. “No matter how hard I try, my face will always be wrinkly and saggy from now on! My beautiful, young luster is gone! But I have to accept that age means waning beauty. At least you’re still a handsome young drake.”

Why was I blushing at that? Why did those words bring a sliver of hope in torn heart? “And even though you’re aging, Rarity, I still think you’re a beautiful as ever.” And why did I let that slip out? I covered my mouth and turned away from her. I could hear her giggle.

“Oh, Spike, when will you run out of compliments?”

“I… well, um…” I was at a loss for words. Her majestic voice could take the breath out of anyone who dared fall for her charms. I was the unlucky victim. Over eighty years of following her around, doing her bidding, and I can’t shake this feeling that something is missing. I don’t feel satisfied just being a friend, yet it’s the only thing I can do to keep her around.

Before the conversation could go anywhere, the waiter came back, balancing our meals on top of his head. He dropped Rarity’s waffles right in front of her and my muffin, along with a plate of hay hash browns and oranges. I looked up at the waiter, eyes rising.

“Excuse me, sir, but I think you might have given me someone else’s meal,” I pointed out. Both Rarity and the waiter chuckled at my reaction.

“Not at all, sir. This nice, young lady suggested that I give you some more food than what you ordered. I offered to put it on the house since you didn’t seem to be in a good mood, but she insisted to have it paid for.”

Rarity nodded. “I don’t buy you not being hungry, Spike. You normally eat enough to feed three ponies, so I’m going to make sure you eat that fill.”

She wasn’t budging huh? The reason for her treating me like this wasn’t clear, but I was still hesitant. It wasn’t an everyday thing for her to order extra food against my will. Then again, it wasn’t really common for us to be out and about like this together.

“Spike, please eat it, for me.”

That face again. She knew how to tug at my heart. Her skills never failed, and like a blind sheep, I gave into her request.

I pulled the plate closer to me and jabbed my fork into the hash browns.

"I'll leave you two alone for now. Enjoy your breakfast!"

"Oh, we will sir," she said, waving at him. "Thank you for your cooperation. Spike can be a little grouchy at times."

I grumbled audibly, causing both of them to laugh at my dismay.

"It's a pleasure, ma'am. I'll be back to check on you two momentarily. Enjoy!"

He trotted off to serve the other customers, leaving the two of us alone. Rarity lifted her knife with her magic and held them over her waffles.

“Oh, I can’t wait to eat my meal! I’m sure the recommendation you gave me will be absolutely exquisite.”

I nodded, weakly smiling at her as I shoveled the food into my mouth. She slowly cut her waffles, raising it toward her lips with her shaking fork. Her magic wasn’t as strong as it used to be, and I often wondered when it would just fade out and grow weak just like…

No, those thoughts weren’t allowed there. I couldn’t let Rarity see me cry. I wouldn’t let her.

I watched her fiddle around with her fork, placing it over the waffles to keep them steady while she cut them with her knife. I sat and watched her eat, barely touching my food. I spent most of that time trying to figure out Rarity. What made her want to come out today with me? Normally, she would take care of her tasks by herself and I would stay at the boutique, holding down the fort until she returned. But today, she insisted that I be with her, and enjoy myself.

“Spike, why aren’t you eating?” she asked, snapping me out of my trance. I clumsily stabbed my food and tossed it into my mouth. She covered her lips and giggled. “You really are something, Spike.”

My ears flopped, and my face went crimson. It was pathetic. A dragon that’s nearly eighty still manages to make a fool out of himself in front of a lady like Rarity. It was shameful. Yet there she was, still smiling warmly at me while starting to eat her waffles. She chewed slowly, humming softly before swallowing.

“My, these are good,” Rarity said. “No wonder you eat these all the time, Spike. They taste absolutely heavenly.”

“I’m glad you enjoy them,” I said half-heartedly. “Wouldn’t recommend anything that you wouldn’t like.”

“Which is why I’m always glad to have you pick these out for me,” she continued, cutting more of her waffles. “It seems you know me more than I know myself sometimes.”

I smiled. Surprisingly enough, it wasn’t a forced smile; it felt natural to me. For the first time in a long time, I truly felt like sharing joy with somepony I loved.

Then that word came to my mind. Love. It’s a complicated word, often shrouded under the shadows of doubt. I never could grasp my feelings for Rarity, whether I loved her or loved the thought of her. It ate away at me almost as much as the fear of losing her.

“There’s the face I like to see!” Rarity pointed her fork at me, causing me to raise my eyebrows. “You have been under the weather lately, Spike. I don’t like seeing my friends so sad and upset. It tears my heart to see that.” She stuck her lips out, her eyes glistening while showing me her adorable, yet soul crushing face. That pouting never ceased to make my heart stop. “I’d do anything, and I mean anything, to make anyone I cared about happy.”

“Is that why you wanted to go out with me today?” I asked, realizing all too late the context of what I said. I dropped my fork as she glanced at me blankly. “Well, I didn’t mean like go out go out. Kind of like two friends having a nice get together. I wouldn’t think of insinuating a date—” I froze once again. Another embarrassing phrase of words escaped my lips. “I mean, you’re pretty enough to date, it’s just… wait, I mean… AAGH!”

I slammed my head on the table… or at least that was what I was aiming for. Instead, I actually sent myself slamming into my own food. I didn’t try to move. I just stayed there wallowing in my own humiliation. Whatever was causing me to stumble today hit me hard. I haven’t felt this hesitant and awkward in a long time. If I recall, I was thirty the last time Rarity made me feel that way. Whatever was happening, it was becoming something of an annoyance.

“Well, that’s part of the reason,” she said, trying to contain her laughter. I slowly lifted my head out of the hash browns and looked at her in confusion. “There’s actually another reason I wanted to come out and do stuff with you today.”

My curiosity was piqued. Maybe it was blind hope, but the way she said another reason had me on edge. I wiped my face and stared at her, waiting for her next words with great eagerness.

“Well,” Rarity began, continuing to cut her waffles into small pieces. “I would rather wait until we got done eating. Let’s just enjoy the pleasant meal before I make this request, okay?”

There was nothing I could say other than okay, and even then, all I did was nod. The rest of the meal went on casually. She wouldn’t let the silence last too long, forcing me into a conversation with her every opportunity she could. Now that I think about it, it was probably for the best. The longer the silence, the more time I was given to think about things that I shouldn’t think about. Those were a non-issue at the time, and dwelling on them is something that I shouldn’t do when in the presence of Rarity. What I should do instead, is blush everything she made her witty, coy comments towards me. Just like old times.

This continued for nearly thirty minutes. By the time I actually finished my meal, it was cold and dry. It’s unusual Rarity finishes her meal before me, but she managed to beat me to the punch, eating at her usual pace. It says something when a refined, aged lady can outdo someone with my size and metabolism. It didn’t take long for our waiter to realize that we were finally finished with our meal.

“So, how did you two enjoy your breakfast?” he asked in one of the most joyful voices I’ve heard in a long time.

“Oh, it was marvelous, darling,” Rarity said. “Spikey Wikey made a wonderful suggestion when he suggested these waffles. They were absolutely divine… if not a little too sweet. I need to watch my sugar a little more. I’m not the youngest thing in the world.”

The waiter's front hoof wavered in the air. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. I still see that young, beautiful lady in you.”

As Rarity blushed, I glared at the waiter, loudly clearing my throat to catch his attention. “Um, are you done yet?”

“Oh, sorry about that, sir. I didn’t mean to intrude on you and your lady friend like that!” He winked at me before placing the check on the table. I quickly grabbed it, trying to block off the look of frustration.

“How much is it, Spike?” Rarity asked. I scanned the receipt and gave my reply.

“Twenty-two bits.” I reached into my pockets to fish out any bits I had. I usually walk around with at least ten bits on hand, but I was growing concerned that I didn’t have enough to afford the meal at hand. As I lifted the bits out of my pockets to count them, I heard a clank on the table. Looking up, I saw Rarity putting down thirty bits.

“This should cover it, correct?”

The waiter nodded. “Yes ma’am, it will. However, I think you might have overpaid me a little.”

“Not at all, dear. You deserve every extra bit that you got.”

I looked up at Rarity, shaking my head at her action. “You don’t have to pay for the meal, Rarity. I can pay for it instead.”

“Nonsense!” she objected. “While it is gentlemanly of you to suggest such a thing, a lady never takes advantage of a friend. You’ve been plenty helpful lately, so this one is on me.”

“But—”

“Not only that, but you seemed to have been scrounging around for money while going through your pockets. I don’t want my Spikey Poo to be completely tapped out of money by the end of the day!”

Why did she have to do that in public? It was already bad enough that the waiter called me her lady friend, but now she had to use that pet name around? I sighed and put my bits back into my pockets. At least she was happy about it.

“Well, thank you for your patronage, ma’am,” the waiter said. “I hope you two have a nice day.”

“Same to you!”

“Yeah, see ya.”

The waiter got our trays and balanced him on his head. He was, an eccentric guy to say the least, but I couldn’t speak too ill will about him. He had good intentions, that’s for sure, even if most of them were just embarrassing me in front of Rarity. Then again, she did the bulk of that herself. The things I go through for lo…

Then my thoughts were interrupted by another. We were finally done eating. Whatever it was she wanted to request was ready for the taking now. All I had to do was ask her about it, and then maybe, just maybe, she’d give me some insight on what she truly wanted.

“So, why did you want me to come out with you today?” I asked.

“Beg pardon?” She cocked her head to the side, raising a single eyebrow in a confused manner.

“Well, you said there was another reason for requesting to go out other than just seeing me smile. Is there anything else you wanted to do?”

Rarity sighed, lifted herself from the chair slowly, walking closer to me. Her eyes were more serious and stern than previously. Chills ran down my spine as many different thoughts ran through my mind, barely any of them coherent.

She was looking towards the ground somberly. I tried my best to piece together what was bothering her, but nothing seemed to form. But as soon as she looked back up, a more hopeful expression emerged.

“If I’m not mistaken, Fluttershy asked you to help make sure her cottage was in good shape before she passed away, correct?”

I fell silent, standing there for moments without a single word able to escape me. Concern painted her face when I didn’t react, so I nodded my head, still unable to say anything.

“Well, knowing you, you’ve probably worked yourself to the bone to make sure it looks just as beautiful as it did before.”

I once again nodded. There wasn’t much I could say, or that I wanted to say.

“I was just wondering if I could… well… could see what you’ve done with the place.”

My eyes widened, and my heart dropped. I try not to go there unless I actually need to. I check the cottage every other day to make sure everything is in order and nopony unwanted was doing anything to it. I remember having to run off some young colts who tried to spray the walls with graffiti. It was awkward trying to chase them off in this small body.

I try to avoid excess visits to avoid the memories clouding my vision. This wasn’t going to help me hide from it. I was going to have to embrace it. That was something I wasn’t ready for.

“I know you’ve done wonderful things to it, but I want to see it firsthoof. I want to see for myself what my old friend would be staying in if she was around today.”

Old friend. Old. I didn’t know if I could take that overwhelming amount of emotion. I wanted to tell her no. I wanted to say that we couldn’t go there, and that it was under management. I wanted to just deny her that opportunity. It was a selfish thought, but one that I was really considering.

“Sure. We can go there if you want.” And yet I just agreed to take her. I mentally beat myself up for that. If she was to see me upset, to break down again at the thought. No. That wouldn’t happen. I would be able to stand and go to Fluttershy’s house without one sniff. It wouldn’t be easy, but I had to, for Rarity.

A warm smile painted Rarity’s face, and she cuffed my cheek with her front hoof, causing me to shiver. “Thanks. I really appreciate this, Spikey Wikey.”

“Yeah, no problem…” I looked down, avoiding her gaze. “Whenever you’re ready, we can go there.”

“I’m ready now,” she said eagerly, standing by my side. “So, shall we be going?”

“Of course, my lady.”

I walked by her side, going at her pace to make sure she didn’t stumble on our way to the cottage. She seemed to be humming pleasantly. She was so happy to go see the former abode of a longtime friend of hers, ready to see the home that she resided in for so many years.

I wish I could have shared her enthusiasm.