Foals Who Chase Lost Rainbows (Hearts and Hooves Day)
Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom stood in the doorway of Scootaloo’s room, the shadow from the figure inside cast across their faces. Rolling her eyes, Sweetie said, “She had to go and be dramatic, didn’t she?”
There, in the middle of the room, hanging from the ceiling fan was Scootaloo’s body, a bedsheet tied around her neck. As she gently swayed back and forth, Scootaloo’s lifeless corpse started to slip off the edge of the fan blade until it eventually flopped onto the ground.
Sweetie Belle shook her head, turning away. “Come on, Apple Bloom. Let’s go wait for her in the usual spot.”
“Wonder why she killed herself this time? Seems kinda weird, doesn’t it?” asked Apple Bloom as she turned away too, following Sweetie Belle.
“Who knows what’s going on in that filly’s mind,” said Sweetie Belle with a twinge of annoyance.
A few hours later, after they’d all met back up again at the clubhouse, Apple Bloom said, “So, somethin’ on your mind, Scoots? I mean… ya kinda killed yourself a little bit there.”
Sweetie Belle added, “If you say it’s for some stupid reason, I swear I’m gonna—”
“I’m asking Rainbow Dash to be my very special somepony,” said Scootaloo matter-of-factly. She leaned back against the clubhouse walls, silently enjoying the dumbstruck expressions on her friends faces.
“All right, let’s back things up a bit,” said Sweetie Belle once she’d regained her composure. Tapping her hoof against the floor, she shut her eyes. “You’re going to ask Rainbow Dash to be your special somepony? We are talking about the Rainbow Dash we all know, right? Isn’t she way older than you?”
“My sister once told me Rainbow Dash already has a special somepony,” said Apple Bloom, shrugging. She glanced over at Scootaloo. “It was kinda awhile ago, though, and when I asked her about it recently, she told me to go play in the yard. I dunno, maybe y’all got a chance.”
Sweetie Belle cocked her head to the side. “Are you guys kidding me? You’re completely glossing over the main problem here. It’s not whether Scootaloo has a chance, but that it’s really weird!”
Scootaloo rounded on Sweetie Belle, her eyes narrowed into thin slits. “Maybe you’re the one that’s weird. I just want Rainbow Dash to love me so she’ll adopt me.”
Letting out a sigh of relief, Sweetie Belle wiped her brow. “Oh, thank goodness. I was worried you were going to ask her out on a date or something. So, do you have a plan then?”
Grinning like a fool, Scootaloo produced a small crystal bottle with a small amount of pink liquid inside it. “I’m gonna give her this!” she said, proudly holding up the bottle.
“Is that the love potion from earlier?” asked Apple Bloom.
“Yup,” chirped Scootaloo. “And I’m gonna give it all to Rainbow Dash. I figure since I already love her I don’t need to drink it.”
Sweetie Belle shook her head slowly. “You idiot… don’t you remember what happened the last time we used that? Are you trying to make Rainbow love you, or fall in love with you?”
“Does it matter?”
“Of course it matters!” shouted Sweetie Belle, suddenly standing up. “You can’t date Rainbow Dash! She’s way too old for you! Plus, I think it’s illegal or something.”
Scootaloo rolled her eyes. “Duh, I already told you I don’t want to date her. I just want her to love me. What aren’t you getting about this?”
“The part where you’re using a love potion!”
Laughing, Scootaloo retorted, “Yeah, so what? I want her to love me, right? It’s not a date potion, is it?”
“Well, shucks,” said Apple Bloom, standing up and making her way to Scootaloo’s side. “I think it’s a great plan.”
“Thank you, Apple Bloom,” said Scootaloo, dragging out the thank you as much as she reasonably could without looking like a huge jerk. “See? Why can’t you be supportive like AB, Sweets?”
Sweetie Belle threw her hooves in the air. “Okay, fine. Whatever. But this still doesn’t explain why you hung yourself.”
“Huh?” Scootaloo cocked her head to the side. “Oh, right. Yeah, see, I figured that I usually die, like, once a day or something, so I figured if I killed myself early on, it wouldn’t come back again later on, and I knew I didn’t want anything to go wrong when I went to talk to Rainbow Dash.”
Nodding slowly, Sweetie Belle said, “That is quite possibly the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard you say…”
“Seemed like a good plan to me…” said Apple Bloom quietly.
Scootaloo waved her hoof dismissively. “Well, whatever. Anyway, I’m off to go win Rainbow’s heart!” She spun around, tucking the bottle under her wing, and headed for the door. As she threw open the door, and let the sun hit her face, she gave one last look over her shoulder at the other two ponies, shooting them a confident smirk.
“Good luck!” cried Apple Bloom, waving her hoof enthusiastically.
“When you do die, try not to make it too embarrassing,” said Sweetie Belle unenthusiastically.
Scootaloo laughed. “Don’t worry. I’m the epitome of coo—”
THWAK!
Slumping to the ground, Scootaloo’s dead body looked almost comical with the loose board plastered to her forehead by the rusty nail.
Sweetie Belle sighed. “Didn’t even make it out the front door.”
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If someone hasn't posted this yet, they should have.
Yeesh...
Obviously,
alexmagnetEquestria's God believes in the double tap rule.it's also a good thing that Scoots didn't want Dash to date her, seeing as how that door nailed her first.
Obviously influenced by a specific "adult" cartoon that shall not be named.
Lest we be reminded of what sort of television that show helped create. 
Nah...its cool. I'm okay with it. 
This chapter was rather odd to some reason. It's tough for me to nail down exactly why, but I suppose it just had a rather wooden ending.
you should do a chapter where its not based on a episode that tells how scoots first died and revived and everyones reaction to it
Yeah, trying to cheat the system usually involves someone getting hit. Hard.
4634205
I gotta million of 'em.
4634227
You saw the chance...
You took the chance.
4634227 Oh, don't be so stiff about it, at least the chapter didn't leave you feeling board...
Scoots, normally when you do a facefault you hit the board. not the other way around.
Maybe Scoots needs some of this after that reverse facefault...
Headon! Apply Directly To The Forehead!
Headon! Apply Directly To The Forehead!
Headon! Apply Directly To The Forehead!
4634431 I fear I shall simply have to shutter those sentiments for now until I can hammer out a better response.
4634632
It seems I really hit the nail on the head with that one, Why don't you make like a tree and leaf.
4634654
if you think they're rage inducing now, wait until I actually try.
So you turned my favorite character on the show into Kenny from South Park...Sign me up!
4634528 [youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&persist_app=1&v=rmiCWsVTrcg]
Scoots totally nailed that plan!
4635244
I don 't know why your YouTube link didn't work but I see where you're going with it and it's a bit more funny your way.
Death Wish 2 reference.
I love this. I just do.
4634893 the reason I say that is because scootaloo is my fav pony so that's why I said that
4637678 You win a thousand points for that.
4637699
Sadly yes...
4637817 But then she'll be back again!
4638074
Yay!!!
*le hugz of happiness*
Darn. Nice attempt at medium awareness, Scoots, but fate doesn't like being toyed with.
An excellent trio of Scootacides to tide us over until you get the time to write more. Thanks for these. I look forward to more whenever they may come.
Hah, nailed it.
Though I was looking forward to seeing Rainbow Dash tear her apart in a fit of overenthusiatic love.
4638158 But then she'll die again.
4641704
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/facebook/000/511/258/66a.png
i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/000/123/466/21e2a35f.jpg
4641806 But then she comes back again!
(This could go on forever...)
4641999
All I can say is:
fc03.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2011/283/2/9/my_painis_approves_by_stangriffin-d4cf880.jpg
4636456 You can join Scootaloo, then
4634010
4637678
Scoots plank wood have worked.
4645174 Someone needs to make a Scootaloo Dumb Ways to Die video
4683929 So true. Though I can't wait for the Cheese Sandwich episode where scoots most likely gets crushed by a giant cheese weel or get drowned in mayonnaise or somethimg incredibly random like that.
I've got to say, I'm surprised. All five chapters since the last time I read and commented have consistently made me laugh at least once each and left me with no major complaints, with the most recent chapter being the best one. The ratio of good chapters to bad ones is climbing. If you were going to take a two week break, you certainly chose a strong point to leave off on.
Speaking of which, that should be over soon, shouldn't it? My unread favourites are gonna skyrocket again. I can feel it...
All's fair in love and scootadeaths.
Scootaloo An Herociding makes ceiling fan have the droopy-sads D:
i.imgur.com/K67rF59.jpg
This deserves some sort of recognition for being funny.
NOW, we're back to the proper formula!
4684350
Nyah. That'd be too predictable and cheesy. It'll be Discord's anvil dropping out of the sky again--because of the Chaos Theory.