Twilight Sparkle: Exposition Fairy!
Applebloom awoke from her dreams filled with winged-unicorn-shaped waffles to discover that she was in the guest bedroom of Twilight Sparkle's house. She checked herself. She still had the horn. She still had the wings. She still had Spike sitting by her bedside-Wait, what?
"Oh, you're awake," Spike said. "Applejack's in the next room. She's with Twilight trying to figure out what happened to you and why, although I wouldn't look a gift horn in the wing." He chuckled at his own joke.
"Yer not funny. Why ya in here with me, anyway?" asked Applebloom cynically.
"Oh, they let me stay here to protect you and stuff 'cause I'm so manly," said Spike, "forgetting" to mention that the real reason he was here was that Twilight had grounded him for spoiling the ending of the latest Daring Do book for her and Rainbow Dash.
"Why would Ah need protectin'? Ah'm a pegacorn, fer cryin' out loud!"
"Alicorn," Spike corrected.
"What?"
"Twilight says a pony with wings and a horn is called an alicorn."
"Ya didn't answer mah question, Spike."
"Well, Princess Celestia has hundreds of thousands of guards in her castle," explained Spike. "Just in case she gets attacked when she's most vulnerable."
"So you was watchin' me in mah sleep 'cause Ah'm a princess?" asked Applebloom.
"Sure! All alicorns become princesses. And the guards aren't just there when the princess is asleep, they're there when she eats her meals, when she takes a bath, when she bushes her teeth, when she holds the royal court all day, when she hosts those boring frou-frou parties, (which I so totally did not attend last week to stalk Rarity!) when she goes to the Canterlot graveyard to morn all the friends she's outlived with her eternal life..."
"Say what-now?" interrupted Applebloom.
"Nothing!" Spike denied as he clapped his claw over his mouth. But it was too late. Applebloom was already crying.
"Ah don't wanna be a princess! Ah don't wanna live in Canterlot! Ah don't wanna raise no cesetial bodies! Ah don't wanna live forever! Ah just wanna live here in Ponyville an' grow old with mah friends an' family an' get mah cutie mark an' have mah privacy an' WHY DO ALICORNS HAFTA BE PRINCESSES ANYWAY?"
"I beleive I have the answer to that," said Twilight Sparkle as she entered the room.
Seeing Twilight as her deus ex machina, (look it up) Applebloom went from crying adoably to smiling adoably in a matter of seconds. (around Ponyville, such an act of emotional phenomenon was called "pulling a Pinkie Pie")
"So ya used yer magic science-y brian ta find me back ta normal?"
"Well... no," Twilight Sparkle replied. "But I have figured out why Applebloom suddenly turned into an alicorn."
"Why?" asked Spike.
"Because technically, she's always been an alicorn."
Applebloom did a double-take. "PurplebookwormsaysWHAT?"
Twilight was unfazed. "You see, all alicorns start out as normal ponies until certain conditions are met."
"Well first, the pony has to be born with perfect gender equality between unicorn, earth pony, and pegasus DNA," Twilight began, "and then she has to sneeze in her sleep without waking herself up while having the hiccups while the stars are perfectly aligned during the night of the luar eclipse on Venus..."
Hours later...
...all the while exactly 2,138,645,391 earthworms (gasp) whistle a dubstep remix of the Pony Pokey, (gasp) with each worm in a differnt post office around the world. (whew!)"
Applebloom blinked. "Whoa," she breathed. how'd ya figure all that out?"
"Oh, we spent days studying," said Twilight. "but in the end, Big Macintosh had the idea to contact Princess Celestia." Twilight blushed. "Frankly, I'm surprised I didn't come up with it myself."
Applebloom's jaw dropped. "Y'all told Princess Celestia 'bout this?!"
Twilight Sparkle frowned. "Applebloom, I know Spike didn't exactly put the whole 'princess' thing in the best light, but..."
"If Celestia knows, Ah'm gonna become a princess fer sure!' A look of despair showed in the Applebloom's face once again. "She' probably on her way right now! This the end for mah life in Ponyville as we know it! Worse, she'll tell everypony about it! Everpony's gonna think Ah'm a freak, or become jealous that royalty an' not wanna be mah friends anymore! (gasp) Mah friends! Sweetie Belle & Scootaloo are gonna kick me outta the Cutie Mark Crusaders 'cause Ah'm too busy livin' in Canterlot! What if they just don't want me 'cause Ah'm different? And how am Ah gonna-"
"Applebloom, look at me," demanded Twilight. Applebloom's red, puffy eyes met with Twilight's serious, understanding ones. "One: Your friends aren't going to take this the wrong way, or else they wouldn't real friends. Two: have you been listening to a word I've been saying?"
"H-huh?" sniffed Applebloom.
"The circumstances for your transformation are too far accurate for it to be a coincidence. There's a reason the Royal Pony Sisters rule Equestria, Applebloom. Because alicorns live forever, they eventually gain thousands of lifetimes worth of experience. Wtih that experience, they guide the ponies of the world down the right path. You, Applebloom, have been graced with the responsiblity, neigh, the honor of doing just so.
"B-but Ah don't HAVE 'thousands of lifetimes worth of expirience!' Ah'm justa foal!" protested Applebloom.
"That's why the greatest mentors alive, including the princesses, are going to tutor you on how to rule Equestria with wisdom, kindness, and strength." Applebloom gawked at this fact.
[Author's Note: And thus, the fic became 20% cooler!]
Millions of questions still swam in Applebloom mind, but she could only surface one into words:
"Can Ah still stay in Ponyville?"
Twilight Sparkle smiled. "We'll see. Now, pack up your saddlebags, let's go."
Applebloom raised an eyebrow. "Go? Go where?"
"Don'tcha know?" Applejack said as her head popped from behind the doorway. "Just 'cause yer an alicorn don't mean y'all not excused from no educatin'! Yer late fer elementry school!"
Oh, crud.
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Loving this story! Follow!
So, awesome!
What did I just read? Really what did I just read?
Ok first the basic plot: Well I've seen each of the Mane 6 become Alicorns, OCs become Alicorns, but I don't think I've read one yet that has any of the CMC become Alicorns. So congrats by having Apple Bloom becoming an Alicorn you've done something somewhat unique.
Now for the rest, formatting looks good, grammar and spelling... meh. Author Notes in the main body, not good... I'm not even going to get into the humor since this is supposed to be a funny one. You have work to do to improve.
First time I've seen a fic where it's somepony other than one of the mane 6 turning into an alicorn. Like the idea, but the chapters seem a bit short at the moment.
I give a thumbs up for effort.
But Its really not my kind of things.
Still, good job. I bet you got a story on your hands there.
I'm not sure if this is a slight trollfic or just a semi-badly written alicorn fic. Either way, pretty good stuff!
354863
Are you like:
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i1149.photobucket.com/albums/o582/XxNotOfThisWorldxX/wtfdidijustread.png
i1149.photobucket.com/albums/o582/XxNotOfThisWorldxX/images.jpg
omgface.com/verysad/the%20fuck1.jpg
Still gonna read it
And so all was made clear-
wait what?
*disk scratch
The worms were doin what now?
And you sneezed while asleep with the hiccups along with the alignment of.....
Still tracking, want to see where this goes
354863
Well.... We have had a CMC alicorn before if you count Nyx, but that's not really the same kind of story. She was created that way, not an ordinary pony who suddenly was alicornized. (I just invented a word, yay!)
Humor felt slightly forced in this one, scattered with spelling mistakes. Though I'm hoping Applebloom mangling 'celestial' was deliberate, because that was adorable.
Take out everything in your summary after the word "princess." You don't need to justify that it's your first fanfic, you don't need to insist that it's not a cliche, and you don't need a copyright infringement warning, because nobody here assumes you own the show. It's fanfiction.
That being said, it's an interesting concept. You can write pretty well, even if the chapters are short.
It seems like there could have been more detail as she goes to breakfast. Get rid of odd things like "not even the all-seeing eleven-thousand eyed beast named Sam, (who, that everypony knew, could like, see everything)" that just don't make any sense. Actually, as I'm reading this, there's a lot of odd random stuff that makes it seem like you're trying too hard to be funny. The concept already lends itself to interesting situations, don't try to shoehorn in stuff like "exactly 2,138,645,391 earthworms (gasp) whistle a dubstep remix of the Pony Pokey" that'll just make your readers groan.
Also, I think that her family would instantly notice if she had wings and a horn. She could've walked into the room, wondered why everypony was staring at her, and then lift the spoon with magic before realizing what's different.
She sees Twilight as her "deus ex machina." How does Applebloom know that word?
poor Applebloom! well, she's so cute, so she'll learn to be a good princess, I bet.
Alicorns are a cliche now? Really?
im tracking it but as a reader im specting a major change in the way you write it... Still you my firend are good in this!! keep doing it
You've got me interested. Needs a little fine tuning, but it has a solid base and has the potential to develop into a great story. I'll track this.
355046(Sees 18 new comments)
(Sees JasontheHuman read my story) 
(ACTUALLY reads comments) 
It's okay, love and torlerate!
And *maybe* Sam the multi-eyed monster was just a *little* over-the-top.
MAYBE.
Good news, everpony! I've just discovered spellchecking! And no more author's notes in the middle of the story. Promise.
So, where is Pinkie Pie and her "So your a Princess/Alicorn party"
358148 Uh-oh. I've forgotten the existence of Mistress Pinkie Pie!
WHAT KIND OF BRONY AM I?
358164 your the type of brony that needs to quickly make up to the Great Pink One and seek her party forgiveness
358183 Okay, I've forgiven myself and found a loophole:
The only ponies that know that Applebloom's an alicorn are Luna, Celestia, Big Mac, Granny Smith, Applejack, Twilight, & Spike. Pinkie & friends shall get in the loop as the plot demands. Thanks 4 the critique, Sgt. Brony!
358431. No problem, that's what I do.
I personally think that immortals should STAY THE FRACK OUT OF MORTAL AFFAIRS!
354863 stop tryin' to squash a persons creativity
I for one am enjoying this story. You are going to get a lot of messages telling you the change your fic but please, do not compromise your work to please others. Write what you want, how you want and don't listen to people saying "you need to write like this, or say things like that, or format your story this specific way..." Write for YOU first and foremost.
I like this a lot. You have earned a spikestache or seven:
(If only there were happy Appleblooms.)
Spike read it faster than Twilight? I find that very hard to digest. And I'm lactose intolerant. god damn it you are disrupting my slumber! My ferocious farts wake me up at night if I digest garbage! I expected better from you. *sniff*
*late for school, with this shit going on*
Applebloom: "............................. fuck."
Seems like you're trying too hard to make this funny ... At first I was like 'Yay! CMC alicorns!' but I found some mistakes and little pieces of it that make me doubt if this was meant to be taken seriously ...
! It's otherwise very good and the story is original and quirky. Have a like.
Also, most of the brackets aren't needed - have faith in your writing! You don't need to justify things in the middle of the story! Not to mention it makes it extremely hard to keep track of ...
ANYWAY, most of that is just little things that make me go
1292939 He probs just skipped to the end of the book, cause he's a troll