• Member Since 29th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen Sep 13th, 2015

RatherHomely


Some weird person who writes stories about ponies. You should probably just ignore him.

E

Time is a fickle thing. It never seems to spend much time with you, nor does it seem to depart when you want it to the most.
This story is about an alicorn who has all the time in the world, but desperately wants to give it all away.
Because forever is a long time...

Inspired by a certain Book of Living Magic and a cat named Screech, and Dreaming with Ponies.
Featured on Equestria Daily.
Proofread by Ex-Nihilos.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 64 )

lik dis if u cry everytim

I swear, someone is cutting onions again. :raritycry:

Oh, joy. Another story about Celestia dealing with the pain of immortality. How original. Well, it was written by RatherHomely, so I might as well give it a chance.

Hello ponyfolks! Stalin the Stallion and Co. here to bring another installation of Stalinviews! Our Stalinviews became 20% cooler!
If you want to know more aabout Crew, Stalinviews (and get one yourself) go check my Blog! Everypony welcome!

Today Stalin have some Pretty unusual thing to review! This story has tag "Sad", which Stalin don't like too much. But oh well, let's give it a try, crew!

i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png Are you ready?

i44.tinypic.com/10ymed3.png Ready!

i44.tinypic.com/xck8jn.png Waiiiit! I forgot my Vodka!

i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png Ok, since everyone is ready, let's dig into Forever by RatherHomely!

-----------------------------

i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png Our story is opening with first-person narration! High-quality one to be exact.

"My tale began when his tale ended."
i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png This tale begins anew.

"You two really think you can defeat moi?"
i44.tinypic.com/10ymed3.png Wait wait waaaait! Since when discord is french? He never spoke like this in the show!

"duo beginning to glow, eyes a brilliant white"
i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png Incorrect verb to make, my friend.


"There was no ruler, and who else but my sister and I could take over the role?"
i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png As i thought, this story is partially narrated by Moon Princess herself! This is getting interesting.

"We were gardeners, in a way, and it was through precious care that the garden would thrive. And we were happy."
i44.tinypic.com/xck8jn.png *hic* Love it! So poethic! Hey, Stalin pal, pour me another!

"Her mother had always been a rebellious earth pony."
i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png Stalin is not sure about it. Celestia is a god-like, or more precise, spirit-like entity. To have an earth pony mother is not fitting well with her.

"There was one sun he'd managed to catch. Even in death it seemed as though he'd still managed hold on."
i44.tinypic.com/xck8jn.png Looove it! *hic* Misha loves poetry! Expecially good one!

"The pony rolled her eyes. "Of course I will! You're my mentor, Princess! You're practically my mom!""
i44.tinypic.com/10ymed3.png Heh, if this took place right at the exam, her mother, who is standing literally few feet away, won't be so happy to hear that!"
i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png Well, dear Pioneer Dash, this is not Twilight Sparkle. This is a filly named Prove, well, at least it seems like it.

i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png Well now, Stalin clearly sees why this story marked as "Sad"

i44.tinypic.com/xck8jn.png *hic!* Pretty well done sad moment! Misha even shed a tear or two!

i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png Well well. Lets see, let's see! This wraps up our story, and now, here's our Overview!

OVERVIEW:

i43.tinypic.com/r8v9k9.png This story is amazing. It has shown us what it mean to be immortal and what sadness and grief it brings.

i44.tinypic.com/xck8jn.png This is very neat idea! And story made in poetic fashion! Misha likes that!

i44.tinypic.com/10ymed3.png Well, hafta admit, we have some minor mistakes here, but overall, nothing to do here.

VERDICT: EXCELLENT STORY ABOUT SADNESS OF BEING IMMORTAL! RECOMMENDED TO READ!

AWESOME story. oh and in case you are wondering im not crying.........not one bit.......well mabye a little:fluttercry:

352923
Isn't it funny when you think you've come up with a fairly original idea, only to find out the idea is overused? Hope it's different enough for you anyway!:twilightsmile:

Celestia is my 4th favorite character. I dislike seeing her sad. But I might give this a chance if I am in the mood sometime.

353042 Don't get too bugged over accusations of being 'unoriginal'. Remember, every story has already been told, but it's never been told the way you'll tell it.

And I liked it. A bit short, but some stories are better that way.

You know, somehow it doesn't surprise me that you can write absolutely heartbreaking, beautiful stories like this in addition to hysterical ones. It does surprise me that I now kind of want to read more about Prove, and Glaive, but that's another thing altogether.

This was excellent. Well done. :pinkiehappy:

Interesting. The idea is, by no means, a new one. I hate to say but these type stories are a dime a dozen. Normally I dislike them because the concept is just overdone by now...

But you... you did something different here. Something that I like VERY much. So for that... *thumbs up and smiles* :eeyup:

*applauds* Bravo. Very well done. :twilightsmile:

As people have stated. Not the most original of ideas for such a story.

But originality isn't everything. This is a wonderful piece of art that really makes one feel the emotions of Celestia as the years role bye...

Fury of the Tempest approves this story.

Why did you tell the story of an alternate Twilight & Spike? Was that supposed to show that she lived so long that even her friendships were repetitive?

Most of it is very well-written, but then it doesn't really have an ending, it just stops.

as she stood over her mother's gave => gvae
taking to the field when others would take to thier books => their books

353042 Oh, finally! You will not believe the **it I had to go through to type this comment! Anyway, I have to say that this was good. It was well done and really pulled at the heartstrings, which is what I think you wanted it to do. I really like the way the scenes flowed right into one another, despite the massive differences in time between them. In particular, I like the transition(or rather, lack of one) between Prove's and Glaive's death beds. It really made these friendships feel fleeting and all the more sad. Also, I like your explanation for Celestia and Luna's immortality and how you handled the Alicorn race. Your reason makes that new princess, Candence, far less of an issue. One gripe I do have is about how you made Prove's situation nearly identical to Twilight's, baby dragon and all. This approach makes Twilight seem like just another in a long line of proteges, which I wouldn't mind except for the fact that she is one of the Elements of Harmony incarnate. Being such a unique pony, it seems like her situation would be just as unique, but your story begs to differ. This really feels like it shallows Twilight's relationship with the Princess, as though she's already gone through this many times over. To me, it makes Twilight a less interesting character, because, in your story, her story is one that has already been told many times over. But that's just my opinion, and, as I said above, I really did enjoy this story. You really can pull off this dramatic stuff, and I, personally, would like to see more of it. But not if it keeps you from your comedic stuff. And if gets in the way of MPPT3K, we're going to have a problem.
This has earned my approval and another like. :pinkiehappy: (I couldn't just have a really long post without an emoticon, could I?)

352834 *licks computer screen*

352834
My god! Your E key, is it ok?!

Massive comment reply time GO!
352936
Mistakes fixed! Glad you liked the story, comrade!
353160
Then who's the first three? I must know!
353244
As a professor of mine once told me, "A story is long enough to reach the end."
354632
Made the fixes!
Also, I was originally planning to end the story when Celestia died. That ended up being too long, if you get my drift. :trollestia:
354813
I suppose it does down grade the specialness level of Twilight. The reason I did it like such was that I wanted it to be more chronological, going from the oldest events of Celestia's life to the newest, thus I had to invent characters that existed before Luna's banishment.
That's the reason. Not necessarily a good one, but it's a reason nonetheless.

362043

Twi, Dash, Scoots, Celestia are tied for first in my book, but in that order of preference.

362132
What's that? You say Twilight is your favorite (kinda)?
Silly DPV111, that's not how you say Fluttershy! :trollestia:

362043 Oh! That makes so much more sense now. I can see why you would be nervous about being unchronological(not really a word :facehoof:), but I think this would have been leagues more effective if you had used a character we were already attached to (i.e. Twilight), rather than making us become attached to these new characters very quickly right before they're killed off, which is made more difficult because we know what's coming for them. I think you did well with it, but using Twilight would be an improvement, even if you have to throw chronology(a real word :pinkiehappy:) out the window. Some of the greatest stories throw chronology out the window, like Pulp Fiction.

This is a good story. Shows why did Celestia become immortal, many stuff across her life, and I particularly like the "To clear her tears, the alicorn blinked." thing. Although I must make one fix: "The alicorn was sitting in a chair, holding a book in her hands." Hands.

oooo, inspired by dreaming with ponies? must read
...
...
...
damnit

It's like I can't go two stories without falling into another mortality story! :raritycry:
But I like you Homely so I'll always give it a go! :pinkiehappy:

I never get tired of these stories that deal with the consequences of immortality, for they are always something to think about.

It is a very heavy price to pay, outliving everyone around you, and the loneliness can feel unbearable sometimes. Yet it is those friendships that you forge through eternity's flow, those beacons of light that are the friendships you make in a sea of time that come and go, that truly make this existence perhaps a bit bearable. For Prove is right: memories are forever, and though you may continue to exist in a never ending abyss of existence, there is no reason for you to be swept away by it completely. Cherish those few moments you have with the many friends that you would make Celestia, for they make this life worthwhile in the end.

....Forgive me, i went off in a bit of a rant there, im not sure if any of that made sense, its 2:00 a.m over here. Anyway, the short of it: Great story, I loved!

These... These are not tears! I'm just sweating from my eyes! :fluttercry:

RH you serioused up on me all the sudden! This is good, very good, but write some more comedy, the world needs laughter too.

Oh my God, your story broke me! I'm leaking this strange salty fluid from my eyes! What's happening to me?!

In all seriousness, that was a brilliant story. Really tugged at the heartstrings.

I couldn't feel the characters at all. This was boring, and generic. You failed to capture the least bit of emotion, only went on a rambling. Also, don't try to switch between third and first person. It doesn't work.

-1

Nice. And I disagree immensely with .. >>Lunausescaps , I think it is emotional, but subtly so; And that makes sense that it would be a bit more withdrawn than is expected, because of the very nature of Celestia's lament; Time and age haven't hardened Celestia necessarily, but made her more sparing with her drama/self-pity/extreme emotions, if you understand my meaning. The tone of the storytelling is in line with the tone of the story.

All in all, I liked it. :raritywink:

I feel like I understand this story more then others that read it, from reading the comments. In my own little headcanon, I had thought about all this already, accept for the details that make it YOUR story; just the basics, the immortality, the emotions. The reality of living forever finally pounding you into a flat grey line, as opposed to the ups and downs of a normal life cycle. Your portrayal of emotion is perfect in that it fits what your describing; the hallow shell it turns you into. Very, very good job.

Not much to say that hasn't already been said I think... but I would like to make a comment to Shrederman38. Did you consider WHY stories that focus on the pain of immortality are often repeated? Because they are true, and it doesn't matter how many there are, they are all different. I have read 3 stories that ended up broaching this topic before:

Spark by AVeryStrange
this story,
and Sometimes, Death can be a Gift by Slickdash

All of them end up pointing it out, and each in their own way. That reflects the feelings and soul of the author, and that... that is enough for me. It doesn't matter if the subject is unoriginal, it is the author it is tied to. All of us have some opinion of this question, and sometimes... we need to read those of others. That's all there is too it.

That is why I want to say thank you RatherHomely... for writing this. Of the three stories I've read, Spark left me ill with how much it hurt to keep myself from bawling (and I don't cry from reading a story... never), and Sometimes, Death can be a Gift made me think about how many people I've already left behind... and how many more will precede me, but your story alone reminded me that sometimes, not everyone that we part ways with is dead, and though we can all share varying views of the afterlife, just because they are gone doesn't mean we won't see them again.

Thanks for that. :twilightsmile:

"The alicorn was sitting in a chair, holding a book in her hands."
That threw me for a loop. Otherwise very good short story. :twilightsmile:

Whoa! Now wait just a motherfocking minute! Celestia is immortal? That's not scientifically possible!

:rainbowlaugh: I kid with you. I know that I shouldn't try to make sense out of MLP. :trollestia::trollestia::trollestia:

In my mind, though, I think that Celestia and other Alicorns can live for a really long time (like several million years) but aren't immortal. Just my opinion, though. Tell me what you think on the subject!

interesting change of celestias orginss of being born normal and earning immortality rather that being a god like many others do.

No! Not another fic on immortality! My heart can't stand this kind of sad!

*reads*

Oh dear! Must...not...cry...:fluttershysad:...:fluttercry:...:applecry:...:raritycry:
These kind of stories always get to me. I have always thought that immortality was a fate too cruel for even the most wicked person, and these stories prove it. Even with all her wisdom, experience, and power, Celestia is still human(so to speak). She feels, she cares, and she loves. And now that she is beyond the grip of time, she suffers even more as she watches the hands of time repeatedly and unfailingly claim those she cares about. To care so much about somepony knowing that they will eventually fade into oblivion as you carry on alone is an unimaginable pian that she has suffered countless times over. But there is some comfort to take. So long as their memories live on and she has somepony to be there for her when she hurts, she is never truly alone. That is why I believe Celestia, or anyone who loses someone close, can continue on and make new bonds. The love they share with those around them, and the memories shared with those who have left, outweighs any pain they feel.

This is why I love these kinds of stories. I get to feel deep emotions that can move me to tears, creativity, and (in a bittersweet way) happiness. Bravo.:pinkiesad2::heart:

352834 this is not youtube lol :applejackunsure:

This story was impressive. I was a touch confused by the "blink" transition, mostly because of the lack formatting, but that's just me. Otherwise, I do like how you pulled this all out.

I like what you've done here. I enjoyed reading it.

Am I the only one, though, who noticed the lack of comment on the immortality of the Mane 6? Using the Elements made Celestia and Luna immortal, why not the current bearers?

Just a thought: Celestia shouldn't be immortal anymore because the Elements of harmony is no longer connected to her and Luna? That is why discord broke free in the first place?

368042 Yes I thought the same thing :)

Yeah, immortality is more like a curse than a blessing. But maybe it's because we cannot grasp it with our limited perceiving. It's true that there are many fics sharing this topic, but every one I read was unique in its own way. And every one was moving. This one too. :twilightsheepish:

368042 369492
Yeah, I also thought of that but that would involve much over-analysis. :twilightsmile: It's a fanfic set in the world of talking ponies, after all. :rainbowlaugh:

369552

I only bring it up because it solves Celestia's problem...and Luna's problem, really. They'll no longer be alone or lonely, Celestia never needs to lose her student again, etc. All that remains is for the sisters to explain it to them...because, I can tell you, some of them won't be very happy with their newfound immortality.

I just thought I'd let you know I caught an error... "She the nturned the book over so she could see the back, a pair of gentle eyes greeted her."

368042>>369492>>369552
A good point. I suppose when I wrote the story, my thoughts were this;
Alicorns are already beings of magnificent power. Having the strongest traits of all three breeds of ponies kinda helps.
So when they used the Elements of Harmony it augmented both of their already incredible powers. And since their power levels (they were over 9000, I should note) were already sky-high, the Elements ended up causing them to become immortal.
Fast forward to when the mane six used it. Not only were they not alicorns (and thus didn't have the same power to augment), but also there was six of them using the Elements. That means the power was split up between the six of them, as opposed to the power being split in half for Luna and Celestia.
At least, that's how I imagine it.:eeyup:

Interesting. There are a few interpretations on immortality, but I think this one covers a good chunk of the sorrow and joy that would come with it. I'm going to have absolute hell writing my character. He's 4 million years at the time of my story. He's already gone through absolute madness from sheer longevity and become his recovery, but how would one be after so much time? His conversation with Celestia and Luna is going to be interesting to say the least.

372528 This would mean they have longer lifes than normal ponies but not immortal? :P

369552 Over-analysing is fun!

373747
I guess so...? Or maybe there wasn't enough magic being channeled into the mane 6 (because the power of the Elements of Harmony was split six ways as I've already noted) to produce long lasting results...? Or maybe they will live longer, and that just hasn't been addressed in the story or the show...?
Gah! I don't know! :twilightoops:

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