• Member Since 1st Dec, 2013
  • offline last seen Dec 26th, 2017

Chaos-Sonata


T

Discord thinks he does everything wrong, that no one enjoys his company, he doesn't know he's wrong until it's to late. The truth is, he will be missed.

Note: Don't worry about me! I'm perfectly fine with my life, this is for those who aren't.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 26 )

That's so sad ...poor discord :fluttercry:

At first I thought that this was going to be another stupid poor written story. But this turned into quite the awesome read.

Its always those people you think about when you are so close to doing it. It stops you and you feel like you need to keep going just because of them. Its quite depressing.

While the sentiment makes sense to me... this seems to be rather paint-by-numbers for a character like Discord. He's thousands of years old and has spent most of that time alone and hated; it's hard to imagine that that alone would drive him over the edge.

My personal experience, as a person who tends to be arrogant and self-important but who also suffers from depression, is that the reasons your mind gloms onto for why you want to kill yourself are different if you really think you are all that and a bag of chips, but it gets you to the same place in the end. I can't see Discord wanting to kill himself because he believes he is worthless. I can see him wanting to kill himself because now that he's discovered that he needs friendship, he has realized that ponies are so different from him that he can't possibly have what he wants -- he can have chaos or friendship but not both and if he tries to balance it in the middle he basically gets nothing -- and thus come to the conclusion that his life is worthless. But he's not likely to feel like "I hurt everyone" or "I'll just get out of the way and then people will be happier"; he's selfish enough that his motives will be self-centered, "I'll never feel happy," "I'll never get what I want", "Life is meaningless anyway so why am I putting up with this," "No one will ever be my friend because they think I'm weird and they won't allow me to fit in with them", etc.

You have to remember when dealing with a character like Discord that he isn't coming from the same place psychologically that most people are. Someone who managed to live his life for many, many years without ever having a friend is not someone who's likely to kill himself because he doesn't have one, especially when he actually does, unless there are other factors. Now, it's true that depression is a disease of irrationality -- you can be beloved by everyone and still want to die because you feel worthless and like no one really likes you, so the fact that Discord really does have a friend who cares probably has little impact on his mental state. But he's too used to no one liking him for it to be the primary thing that pushes him over the edge. It could be that what's tipping him over the side is the fear of going back to that life, that now that he realizes what he was missing all along he realizes how miserable he really was without it and he can't face living that way again. But the way you have it set up in the story, it sounds like he's just thinking "I suck, no one cares, I'll just get out of everyone's way" rather than "No one really cares and I can't face living that way again".

The story is touching, but the emotional state you're trying to evoke is weakened for me by the fact that I just can't see Discord thinking these particular things as a lead-up to suicide. Perhaps the difference between "I'm worthless" and "Everyone treats me like I'm worthless" is subtle, but it's important -- what I've seen in my own experience is that attempts to address depression with logic are usually futile anyway, but to the extent that they ever work, you have to address the specific "logic" the victim is using. You'd handle "I'm worthless" differently from "Everyone thinks I'm worthless", and both of those are different from "Life is worthless", and all of those are different from "My life is worthless because I will never get what I want".

I don't mean this to be harsh. The fact that this isn't an issue for you makes you a courageous writer, willing to take on trying to write a psychological perspective you've never experienced. It's not unusual for a writer trying to write about something they don't have personal experience of to draw from fairly standard tropes, and often this will work, because there's a lot of commonality in human experience. Most people react to the same stimuli in similar ways. But when you're dealing with a character as weird and alienated as Discord, going to the standard tropes is usually not going to work. If you ever need advice about depression for anything you write in the future, I've both studied it for my college degree and lived through it, several times, so I'd be happy to give you advice.

god dammit, i'm crying again. Why?! Why did i browse stories with the "sad" tag?!

Shit! I'M CRYING AGAIN! I wish this was longer!

3938321 Sorry I'm not good at writing long stories! If you want I could add an after math or something like that.

Don't get me wrong here, I like it, but I feel a lot more could be done to increase the sad nature. I did get the feels once or twice, but not as often or as strong as I could have if it was longer. But since the top comment said that you aren't too good at long stories, I will hit you up with a like, favourite and follow. Despite what I said about length, I see good things here.

I feel like crying...

I wish people will actually care when im gone...
(I have no friends...)
:(:fluttershysad:

Comment posted by camskye deleted Jun 14th, 2014

4548708
thanks,
I really needed to hear that...:pinkiesad2:

my little dashie couldn't make me cry





I cried waterfalls when reading this what the fuck :raritycry::raritycry:

4550397 I cried while making this :fluttercry: isso sad.

4549098 :twilightblush: If you want to talk sometime you seem pretty cool!

4557787 I know jesus Christ
also I love the whole friendship thing between flutters and discord
when it gets to romance I hate it tho :rainbowwild:

4567388 of course you do, I meant it more as a friend love though otherwise there would have been a long kiss where discord drops down dead at the end of it. :pinkiehappy::fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry::fluttercry:

4567388 I DIDNT PREVEIW MY COMMENT there's a pinkie happy OMG.

4574254 Nice job :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:
the same thing always happens to me :rainbowlaugh:

I feel that this is rushed, I, while I liked the story, think that you should rewrite it using a different story space thingy (it's where you write the story) and post it again.
Thanks,
Evia

I CRIED MY EYES OUT I CAN BARELY REMEMBER A TIME IN MY LIFE I CRIED SO DANG HARD!!! I am not crying as much now because I literally took the time to make an account on here just to comment on this story. I read the comments and knew what was going to happen and I didn't really want to read this but I knew I had to woman up and read it but now I regret this so much. The only thing that kept me from screaming NOOO!!! was the fact that my mom is here right now. OMG please please please I beg of you please make a less dark version or something were he survives, my heat can not take this much sadness D'X TT3!!!

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