4th Card: Special Talents
The fact that so few ponies seemed to know or care much about the esteemed position Twilight Sparkle held as one of Equestria's princesses, let alone her tenure as Princess Celestia's personal student of so many years, was a testament to the effectiveness of BUTTS.
In order to keep ponies from looking too deeply into some of the incidents which had given cause for the organization's existence, BUTTS had carried out a decade-long campaign of subliminal suggestion, media manipulation, and drugs in every major water supply in the nation with the aim of crafting a particular image for the focus of their work. Aside from an extremely modest level of celebrity, the average Equestrian citizen would look upon a mare who had helped save the world on multiple occasions, had close personal ties to their immortal sovereign, was already related to royalty through marriage before elevating herself to godhood... and then shrug it off with a resounding "Meh."
None of this had any effect on a certain alicorn princess being unable to get a cab in Manehattan, mind you. It really is that hard to impress anypony there.
The success of BUTTS's work over the years did make it difficult at times to justify their continued operation, however. Although Celestia herself remained perfectly aware of every vital service BUTTS had covertly provided for her former student, to the few others who knew of its existence, the fact that Twilight Sparkle's antics so rarely made the headlines was seen as a sign of obsolescence rather than competence. Most were nobles and bureaucrats who were more than happy to simply accept Princess Celestia's word that BUTTS was a necessary institution and leave it at that.
But there was always that one. The one pony who ranked highly enough to be aware of such things, while also possessing the levels of both egotism and stupidity needed to question the goddess who raised the sun every morning.
"I say this entire 'crisis' is nothing but a fraud, perpetrated by a couple of second-rate, low-born charlatans in the hopes of squeezing more bits out of the treasury! Lite-Brite here is nothing but a common swindler, trying to hijack the government for his own gain."
That one pony, of course, was Prince Blueblood.
"I'm not trying to hijack Equestria," Night Light snapped. "I'm trying to save it! With so many of my daughter's counterparts entering this dimension, especially the evil ones, BUTTS is needed now more than ever!"
"Ah, yes. The 'League of Evil Twilights'," Blueblood retorted derisively, making air-quotes with his hooves while he did so. "We in the noble class have dismissed such claims. I've seen no evidence whatsoever that this so-called threat even exists!"
Night Light was about to shout something borderline treasonous (though under the circumstances, he was fairly sure that Princess Celestia would give him a pardon) when he was interrupted by a beeping noise. "Ugh... just a moment, I need to take this," he said, pulling out an emergency headset and placing it on his head. Turning away from Blueblood, he growled, "What is it?!"
On the other end of the line, Agent Coltson's voice started to say, "Director, we have a security breach! A new Twilight's--"
Coltson's voice suddenly cut out in a burst of static, only to be replaced by one that Night Light recognized as belonging to his daughter. "Hi, 'daddy.' Gotta say, I'm pretty impressed. My dad's just a regular Mr. Johnson, but you? You're sitting in the big 'top fascist' chair. I'd stomp in applause, but my hooves are kind of busy hackin' your files."
"Hackin' my files?"
"Hackin' your files," she replied smugly.
"Thwartin' my plans?"
"Thwartin' your plans?"
"Are you?"
There was a brief pause before the Twilight on the other end of the line snickered. "Oh, maliciously."
Night Light smirked. "Bitchin'. I don't suppose you'd be willing to repeat that for this smarmy, metrosexual asswipe who's trying to cut my funding?"
"I heard that," Blueblood huffed.
"Good, then I don't have to say it louder."
Truth, Dare, or Drink
by CrowMagnon
"Wow."
"Yeah."
"It's like... it's... wow."
"Yeah."
Most of the others stared at Faith and Abstract Twilight, hoping for more details. If nothing else, the way the tiny bit of liquor made their eyes shine was interesting, but only for a little while. Eventually, Zapapple lost patience and asked, "Well? Ya gonna keep mutterin', or are ya gonna tell us what it's like?"
Abstract Twi smacked her lips and replied, "Okay, well... you know that feeling when you're in bed and the room is cold, but you're wrapped up in a warm blanket and you know you don't have anything to do that morning, so you feel like you can just lay there forever? That's what it tastes like."
"Say, have you noticed, Twilight? It feels like things have gotten less... zany since we've been here. I didn't really notice before, but everything seems... clearer at the moment," Faith observed.
Captain spoke up, replying, "Oh, you noticed? That's just because the Author's different." The others looked to the soldier, most with quizzically raised eyebrows. Coughing into her hoof, she explained, "Something a friend of mine told me about, once... The Alternate Universe Threshold of Reality. The way he explained it, each universe--or sometimes a group of universes--has a unique 'Author' signature. When somepony travels from one universe to another, the Author of that world will assert itself on them, often causing changes in behavior to conform to local reality. The fact that we're all congregated together away from the action has probably given us our own Author for the time being, though the local reality's will re-assert its influence on us once we get out of here and involved with the mission again."
Faith looked toward the door. "Huh, I expected that 'Wall Breaker' character to pop in for some reason."
Twicora narrowed her eyes, scrutinizing the Captain. "Why would somepony who claims to know about inter-dimensional rules believe that she had been pranked so stubbornly, like a mule?"
Captain blushed and glanced toward Rollypolly as the baby dalek poked its eyestalk out from under Aurora's wing. "The one who told me about it... he had experience with that sort of thing, but he needed an extremely advanced vehicle in order to travel through time and relative dimensions in space. I just couldn't believe I was yanked from my own world so easily that I never even noticed it. Plus, I was under a lot of stress when you showed up..."
Dusk chimed in by asking, "Well, anyway, isn't it Faith and Abstract Twi's turn to draw?"
"Actually, GL was technically the last one to answer a question. Therefore, it would be her turn to draw. Besides, those two seem a little distracted," Aurora replied while the duo waved their hooves in front of their faces.
GL chuckled and created a tweezers construct, which she used to draw the top card from the 'Deeds' deck. "Heh, alright. Let's see... Ooh, 'How did you discover your special talent?' Now that's a funny story. When I was a filly, I went through the entrance exam to get into Celestia's School for Gifted... um... Unicorns." She paused a moment, remembering Princess Aurora's comments on the subject and gave the alicorn a 'what can you do?' shrug.
"Anyway, it's time for my final test. A test of magical ability. I'd studied and studied and practically worked my horn off practicing what little magic I could perform back then, so imagine my surprise when they brought in--"
Dusk interrupted, asking, "A dragon's egg?"
Taken by surprise, GL's eyes went wide. "Uh... yeah, actually. But here's the funny part. So they tell me I'm supposed to hatch this thing, and I have absolutely no idea what to do. I'd never read anything about hatching dragons, so I just pour every little spell I can possibly think of, but nothing's so much as chipping the shell. Eventually, it feels like I'm not actually doing anything at all, so--"
"You apologized to the proctors for wasting their time and gave up?" This time, it was Captain who interrupted, her voice low and hurt.
"... Yeah," GL replied. "But it gets better, because just as I'm about to leave, there's--"
"The Sonic RAINBOOM!" Abstract Twi blurted out, rearing up on her hind legs. "An' it startles you so much, yer magic goes nuts, hatchin' Spike and turnin' yer parents into plants!" She flapped her wings a bit to keep her balance, but ended up over-correcting and tumbling back against Faith. "Hee... I think that Starshine's starting to kick in."
GL groaned. "Oh come on, you all have the exact same story? Well that takes the wind out of my sails," she grumped.
Captain flinched a little. "Well... mine ended slightly differently..." she said.
With a sheepish grin, Dusk added, "And my dragon's name is Spines."
"It's actually very similar to the test I put my own student through," Princess Aurora admitted. "Although she hatched her pet phoenix, Mina. But that test was to determine whether or not she would be the future bearer of the Element of Magic, and now that I think on it, I've yet to see you perform any traditional unicorn spells."
GL tilted her head. "Element of what, now? Sorry, this is the first I've heard of anything like that. And I'm still pretty good with regular magic--That's what my cutie mark represents, after all--but I use the power ring as much as possible because in some ways, it's actually more difficult." She grinned, reaching up to tap a hoof against the ring on her horn. "You can learn spells just by memorizing them and understanding the formula that make them up. The way to go about it has already been established through empirical testing. To make a construct, I have to focus on creating something from scratch out of sheer willpower. My magical training does help with that, though, so it's not like any of it went to waste."
Turning to the abstract duo, she asked, "So... I guess we know her cutie mark story, but do you feel up for telling us about your special talent, Faith?"
Faith, who was looking somewhat discomfitted by how closely his slightly more inebriated companion was leaning against him, cleared his throat. "Well, no harm in that. Long, long ago, when the draconequus Discord ruled Equestria, I was an infant pony."
"Ya mean ya weren't born an abstract?" Zapapple asked.
"Abstracts aren't born. They come from the ranks of mortals... in most cases." Faith shook his head as he explained, thinking briefly about the current abstract of Laughter. "Fate certainly has a sense of irony, there. No, I and the ones who I would come to think of as my family were all mortal ponies during Discord's reign. When we became abstracts, I was still practically a newborn foal, and the pure, unsullied faith of an infant caused me to become the embodiment of that trait.
"Unfortunately, that means I don't remember much of it. As far as my memories are concerned, I have always been as I am, so I'm afraid I don't have much more to tell. What about you, Twicora? Forgive me for my rudeness, but I couldn't help but notice that you have a Zebrican life symbol instead of a cutie mark."
Zapapple raised an eyebrow as Faith gestured to the starburst symbol so similar to some of the other Twilights, but painted on Twicora in the same color as her stripes. "Life symbol? Ah thought she jus' painted somethin' there on account o' bein' a blank-flank."
If the striped unicorn took any offense from either comment, she simply shrugged it off. "Without the paint, my flank would be bare, it's true, but I don't need one to advertise my talent for potions and brews. My journey of self-discovery is just as meaningful to me as any cutie mark could ever be.
"When Shining and I were merely filly and colt, the embassy came under assault by a tribal revolt. Zebras and ponies met in a terrible clash, the aggressors led by a warlord named Whiplash."
Aurora groaned under her breath and muttered, "Ugh. Him..."
Zapapple leaned in and whispered, "Y'all recognize the name?"
"He's... technically my brother-in-law. Thank Vad Skypole he's mortal, so he'll be gone in fifty years or so..."
Twicora cleared her throat, giving her whispering counterparts a chastising look before continuing. "The rebels invaded the building, and many good guardponies did fall, though my brother surprisingly managed to disable many through his skill with a Vita ball. Whiplash's parting shot, however, struck him with a dart tipped with a poison that slowly encroached on his heart. My parents sought Equestrian doctors who could counter the toxin, but did not find any. I, however, recalled reading of curative plants in my textbooks on local botany. Even still, I could not find a cure, and my brother's death seemed so terribly sure..."
Twicora softly dug at the floor in front of her with a hoof, looking down at the table. Sensing that she was trailing off into unpleasant memories, Seafoam asked, "Well, it turned out alright, didn't it? You said he's an athlete now, right?"
Twicora nodded, a bittersweet smile on her face. "Yes, today he's healthy as a horse. I just remember how terrified I was back then, and how it could have been much worse. Though an antidote was beyond my scope, I did find a medicine which kept him alive long enough that there was hope. One day was as long as he was expected to survive, but he lasted for the three that it took for Zecora to arrive.
"Her knowledge of medicine is beyond compare, and because of the antidote she brewed, Shining's life was spared. When she heard that he had been held back from death's embrace by a mere tot, she offered to take me on as her apprentice right there on the spot. Later, I was given the life symbol in a shamanic rite. To me, it represents the stars that guide the lost with their light."
To Twicora's left, as well as her surprise, Zapapple started stomping the floor in applause. This spread around the table, with all giving a few stomps except Aurora, who smiled warmly and mused, "That's my niece... She is as fortunate to have you for a student as your brother is to have you for a sister."
Twicora blushed, but smiled at the compliment before gently ribbing Zapapple. "And I almost thought that with your pride, you would have rooted for the other side."
The earth pony hmphed. "Ain't lahk Ah hate all unicorns. Jus' the ones who prance around, noses in the air thinkin' their horns make their farts smell lahk cinnamon rolls."
Dusk perked up. "Oh, I know a spell for that! It actually alters the molecular structure of..." Seeing Zapapple give him the stink-eye, he coughed. "Never mind."
Remembering it was her turn, Zapapple turned a bit to show off the zap apple on her flanks. "As fer how Ah found mah special talent, it came the first time Ah helped Granny make zap apple jam! If'n ya ain't ever seen it bein' made, it takes a lot o' steps that don't seem ta make no sense. Especially fer a li'l filly bouncin' around, singin' the alphabet while wearin' bunny ears on her head." When some of the others struggled to stifle their laughter at that image, the farmer smirked. "Yeah... 'bout that point, Ah started thinkin' Granny was just funnin' with me an' AJ, mahself. In fact, the more Ah thought 'bout it, the sillier it all seemed an' the madder Ah got."
"Oof, I know how that goes," Abstract Twi said, looking slightly more sober again while a few others nodded in sympathy. Mostly with images of a physics-defying pink party pony in mind.
Zapapple continued, but eyed the bottle of Starshine with a hint of longing as she did so. "Ah jus' couldn't wrap mah head 'round the idea that paintin' polka-dots all over the kitchen could have anythin' ta do with makin' jam. Came to a point Ah jus'... exploded. Started shoutin' at Granny... sayin' she was either havin' fun at our expense or jus' plain senile."
The farmer let out a laugh and shook her head. "Shoulda been watchin' mah flank, because AJ started wailin' on me soon as the words flew outta mah mouth. An' rightly so, Ah reckon. Big Mac pulled us apart 'fore we could send each other to the hospital, but he took a few licks in the process. Once we simmered down to the point we could listen without buckin' each other in the head, Granny sat us down an' told me 'bout the meanin' behind all the little rituals.
"Maybe it helped that Ah was still too steamed ta listen to mah head, but as Granny was talkin' 'bout the zap apples an' all their likes an' dislikes, Ah realized she was talkin' about 'em almost as if they were people. Now, Ah'm an earth pony, but it was always AJ who had the kinship with the land. Ah'm good with workin' out the most efficient way ta run a farm, but generally in a practical sense. That day, though... Ah started ta feel somethin'. While mah head was distracted, mah heart started talkin', an' Ah realized jus' how much the zap apples were livin' things full of magic.
"More importantly, Ah realized how much Ah'd been bangin' mah head against the wall by tellin' mahself that jus' 'cause Ah didn't understand somethin' at first, that meant it was wrong. Ah realized Ah needed ta start payin' more attention ta how things actually are than jus' how Ah say they should be. An' when Ah started doin' that... well, Ah started noticin' little things Ah'd never realized before. Ah started ta actually see the way the jam reacted well to the things Granny had spent her life figurin' out. After an accident with some clothespins, Ah even noticed the apples seemed to lahk it when Ah walked around 'em with clothespins stuck on mah tail. Took five years of experimentin' to figure out that seven in the tail an' three in the mane was the best amount... Ah think they've got a thing fer prime numbers.
"Heh, anyway, point is that when Ah opened mah mind an' realized that Ah had a real, meaningful connection with the zap apples, that's when mah cutie mark popped onto mah flank."
"That was a wonderful story, Zapapple," Aurora said. "I'm afraid that, compared to the two of you, my own story will be quite boring... so I'll take a 'Dare.'"
Blithely ignoring the surprise of the others, Aurora picked up the top card off of the 'Dare' stack and giggled as she read its contents. "Oh my. Alright... Rollypolly, I'm afraid that I'll have to get up for a bit, but feel free to take my seat."
"Certainly, Prin-cess Aurora," the baby dalek replied, moving onto the cushion as Aurora removed her wing from him and stepped back, standing at her full, impressive height.
Gathering power into her horn, Aurora's magical aura spread out from her horn, gradually covering her entire body. When she was completely obscured from sight behind her magic, there was a sudden flash and a popping sound, after which the regal alicorn was gone from view.
"I don't get it. Where'd she go?" GL asked. She was immediately startled and answered by a flash of purple zipping by mere inches in front of her face.
Aurora giggled, slowing down and hovering over the center of the table with flaps of her wings as she revealed herself to be no larger than a kitten. "I apologize, GL, but it's been quite some time since I had an opportunity to really stretch my wings, and the training room is so much more spacious this way." With that, she flitted over toward Rollypolly and created another, smaller cushion for her to settle on atop the dalek's domed metal shell.
Captain blinked in surprise, picking up the card with her magic. "So... you shrank yourself and have to stay that way for the next three rounds?" she asked, reading the card.
"Indeed, and I have to say that it's rather novel having to look up to everypony, even with Rollypolly's help."
Abstract Twi grinned and leaned across the table, held back from flopping across it by Faith. "D'awww, you're so cute!"
This caused Aurora to titter from her perch. "It's been a long, long time since anypony's called me that, and I thank you for it. I just hope that, given the source, it isn't seen as a form of narcissism."
"I don't think so, given the circumstances," Faith replied with a smirk, pulling his partner back down onto her cushion. "So, Dusk, anything to add?"
"Not really," Dusk replied with a shake of his head. "My story's pretty much exactly the same as GL's and your Twilight's, except with the genders switched. What about you, Seafoam?"
The capricorn shrugged. "What's to tell? We capricorns don't dwell on 'special talents' like you ponies do. Yeah, we have individual strengths and weaknesses, just like any other creature, but when something needs doing, we get it done instead of moaning about how we don't have a tattoo on our asses to tell us we're good at it. I'll take a drink instead."
While Seafoam used her magic to levitate the bottle and one of the glasses over toward her, Aurora cautioned, "Now, remember that this is very, very potent liquor, my little capricorn."
Seafoam snickered as she poured out a small splash of the shining liquid into her glass, though it was still a good four times more than either Abstract Twi or Faith had imbibed. "Relax, princess. After seeing those two, I have a good idea of how much I can handle." With that, she raised it to her lips and tossed it back. After swallowing, she smacked her lips a few times. "Mmm... oh, wow. That tastes like that warm, fuzzy feeling you get at the end of a good battle... when you're standing on top of a pile of your enemy's dismembered limbs."
Going pale with horror, Dusk asked, "How is that a taste?! No... no, wait... there is no possible answer that would make me less terrified."
Seafoam laughed and lightly punched the stallion in the shoulder, and the more observant noticed she was already a bit wobbly while doing so. Not to mention that the liquor's glow seemed to be glimmering in her eyes. "Oh, man up. It's just... oh... hey, I never noticed before but... you're kinda good-looking. And sparkly... hehee, sparkly... Dusk Shine is twilight sparkly! Hey... are you a vampony? Because I heard vamponies spa--"
"NO THEY DON'T," Captain shouted at the top of their lungs, mere moments before Dusk and Faith were just about to do the same. Seafoam winced from the volume, and her bladed tail began to lash from side to side.
Seeing the capricorn's agitation, Captain quickly modulated her voice and said, "Sorry... reflex and bad experiences."
Seafoam narrowed her eyes, baring her teeth at the Ranger... but that expression spread into a smile as she leaned in to nuzzle Captain's neck. "Aww, that's okay, I forgive you. After all, we're buddies, aren't we, Cappy? Cappy...ricorn! You're practically a capricorn! That makes you my very friendest best..."
Captain started to blush as it quickly became apparent that either Seafoam was messing with her, or she was a very affectionate drunk. "Uh... yeah... h-hey, why don't you lean on Mr. Sparkle for a bit instead?" To her relief and Dusk's dismay, the capricorn did just that and started nosing at his wings.
Trying to stifle her laughter (but not very hard), GL asked the flushed Ranger, "So, that leaves you. What's your story, Captain?"
Captain Sparkle suddenly remembered that it was her turn, and shook her head. "Oh, right! Well..."
The others watched the embarassed soldier close her mouth, giving the bottle of Starshine and the 'Dare' stack each a long, wary look before she let out a sigh of resignation. "Okay, well, mine started like yours, GL, but... I failed. There was no Sonic Rainboom. I never even heard of the Sonic Rainboom until years later when I joined the Rangers. Nyx, the first Ranger, was the only pony in history who was said to have created one, and one of my subordinates was practically obsessed with recreating it."
Captain glanced toward Rollypolly. "I didn't find out why until later... Anyway, my magic never got jump-started the way it did yours, so I ran out of the testing chamber and bumped into another applicant who was practicing her own spells to prepare for the test. There was a flash and... well, the next thing both of us knew, we were in a little-used part of the castle. Then, while we were trying to find our way back, we found out that there was a dangerous monster running around back there. A cockatrice that had been in the middle of getting transported to Princess Celestia's menagerie, but which managed to escape somehow and petrify the guards.
"Neither of us had any idea where we were, and as soon as the cockatrice was aware of us, it started stalking us through the corridors. We had no way of knowing if anypony was going to come help us in time, so I started thinking up ideas to get out of the situation. Even back then, I could figure out that the ones I'd come up with wouldn't work, though, so I thought up more. And then some more, and more, until my brain was crammed so full of plans that it felt like my head was going to explode.
"And then I finally figured one out that had a good chance of working. I needed the other filly's magic to compensate for how useless my own was back then, but we set up a trap for the cockatrice... and I was the bait."
A gasp rose up from many of the other Twilights. Seafoam blinked and slurred, "You seriously put yourself in front of a monster that turns its prey to stone just by looking at it? When you were a filly?" With another toothy grin, she exclaimed, "That is hardcore!"
Captain blushed again at the compliment and nodded. "I had to! It was the only way to make sure it was in the exact position we needed it to be when we sprang the trap, and she needed to be out of sight so it wouldn't notice her casting her spells." A humble smile spread across Captain's face. "And it worked. She did her part perfectly, and we incapacitated the cockatrice long enough to head out and find an adult. Princess Celestia herself congratulated us for our quick thinking... even offered to take us on as her personal students, but..."
Captain bit her lower lip, letting out another sigh before continuing. "I just couldn't accept. I'd always wanted to be a scholar, and the opportunity to learn from Celestia herself was beyond my wildest dreams, but the instant she made the offer, I saw myself back in the testing room... failing. And then I saw myself failing over and over again in front of her, constantly disappointing her. Even when I tried to imagine myself succeeding... I would see myself tearing myself apart out of fear of failure."
Dusk and Abstract Twi flinched, Captain's description of her feelings hitting rather close to home for them. Even GL grunted a little, thinking of the stress she'd put herself through during her time as Celestia's student. The superhero reached out and put a foreleg around her counterpart's shoulder.
Captain was startled for a moment by GL's gesture, but soon smiled in return. "It's okay. I know now that it wouldn't necessarily have been that bad if I'd accepted. Especially seeing all of you, and how you turned out. But back then, I just couldn't picture any future where it worked out for me.
"Besides, it wasn't just about where I was so sure I'd failed. Finding a plan out of the thousands of options available and putting it into action. Putting myself on the line to protect another pony. I realized that I did have a special talent, and that I could still use it to serve Equestria. As soon as I realized that... well, that's when I got this."
Captain twisted her body to show the starburst-shaped compass rose that was her cutie mark. "It represents my talent for tactics and strategy. The ability to navigate through countless bad ideas and half-baked plans until I find the one that leads me to the best end possible."
Seafoam rose to her hooves and slurred, "You sayin' you have the best end here? 'Cause I take inception to that! Watch me work it!" With that, she turned around and started twerking her fishy rump, forcing those closest to her to quickly lean out of tail range. "Yeah! Yeah, that's right, it's too hot for ya, isn't it?"
"I did caution her," a bemused Aurora reminded the group as Seafoam's tail blade cut a notch out of the table.
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How about friends for the next card
I'm pretty sure defender2222 wrote in the main story that Twicora actually does have Twilight's cutie mark.
4053165
Could happen.
4053437
Hmm, I couldn't go through every single chapter to double-check, so I wrote her lack of one based on his Author's Note for Twicora's introduction. If need be, I'll edit it.
4053506
Thank you.
4053550
This is from the 'Meet the Apples' chapter of the main story.
4053574 Alright. I'll still wait for defender to get back to me for a definitive Word of God ruling, but I'll be sure to re-work it as needed.
As much fun as it can be to see the backstories of some of the Twilights, I think I'm enjoying more of the aftereffects of them getting drunk especially Seafoam.
4054031 Then at least I'm doing something right.
4054176
Well the mental imagery of Seafoam falling all over Dusk is just hilarious (this needs to exist as fanart or something). But more than that it's not the only thing I liked just my favourite part of it (the cold opening or the Captain's violent react to sparkling vampires is a somewhat close second). I think this story is going well so far though I can only imagine how bad the effects will be as they get more drunk.
Nice Chapter. I can't wait for the next one. How many chapters do you plan on this story having?
4055250 Thanks, but I can't say I really have a plan. Whatever I can get away with while still enjoying it.
Great
You do realize how many people will be clamoring for a Doctor Whooves episode now?
4053574
Well, after shooting a few messages back and forth with defender2222, it turns out we're both right, in a sense. I've modified Twicora's section a bit to clarify things.
4058403
Yes... exactly as planned.
4059556 Cool. Hey, wanna have me as a pre-reader? This is the second time I've noticed a mistake for you to fix.
4059610 Oh, it probably wouldn't hurt.
4059725 So, that's a yes?
hmm, i thought Dusk's dragon is named Spines...
3913883
BUTTS, ANUS, nice opening... no, just no
4061123
*checks* True, I must have seen Barb used elsewhere. Now, granted, defender's already taken liberties with the name for Scootaloo's r63 counterpart (because Scooteroll is a really bad name) so I might be able to get away with Barb because I think it's a better name... but no, I'll go ahead and change it.
4061770
4061390
I was filled with both pride and shame when I came up with that one.
4059766
Embrace the uncertainty!
4061782
You should also change the name of Luna's r63 counterpart, Artemis is a girl's name (or a goddess's name as it were)
4061937 I'm aware, but I think I'll keep that one. Gender aside, it's a cool name. Besides, maybe that's why he went crazy and evil in the first place. Sort of a 'boy named Sue' deal.
4062133
Okay, but you should at least change his evil form, Apollo is a sun god
4062550 Eh? I don't see where I used the name Apollo anywhere.
4062564
You didn't, but On a Cross and Arrow did.
4062571 Ah, okay. Well, it probably won't come up, anyway.
4062571
...wait... are you asking Crow to change something... another writer did... in one of the most well known stories in this fandom?
BRILLIANT!
That opening, that's my favorite part of this chapter. The rest comes in a close second, with drunk Seafoam in a shocking 1.5th.
4064091
4066818
Thank you kindly.
4059556
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The funny thing is, S4 showed Twilight does have trouble getting a cab!
Hm.
Of course.
My TFS sense are tingling.
That makes a lot of sense actually.
Low blow.
I see.
Not sure.
I see.
Ouch...