Mischmasch

by SpiralWriter

What Lurks Beneath

FUCK.

The monster was slithering it's way towards Alamo at a casual pace, as if it knew it's prey wasn't going to be any trouble at all. It's long and slime-encrusted body writhed against the woodwork with a horrendously scratchy noise. I cringed at the sound, my headache returning from a dull beat to a full-force shock. I held a paw to my scaly forehead, trying to at least get my bearings. Okay, what were my options here? I could run, but probably meet other worms outside, there were shouts and guttural roars echoing all around Appleloosa. Or, I could lend a hand, or a combination of paw and claw per say, to Alamo over there, probably buy him some time to escape. I looked down at myself and weighed the choices. Could this new body possibly grant me any means of physical prowess? I wasn't that much of a scrapper back on earth, only a few fights under my belt, and I hardly won most of them. Plus, I was barely in any condition to fight such a beast.

THIS.

Not much time to think after that. The worm reared up what could barely be called a head, scraping against the ceiling and sending a good bit of it collapsing down upon it. It gazed down at it the old pony, slowly inching backwards for the kill. Alamo Wall didn't seem to be showing any emotion at all, only looking up indifferently at the towering monstrosity as if it were some minor annoyance. Maybe the coot was senile? Heck, even senile people could tell when danger was smack dab in front of them. Perhaps he was more crazy than senile.

The worm was going to make it's move. It suddenly lurched back to gain momentum, and at the same time I rushed forward, gritting my fangs at the immense pain jerking through my nerves from previous wounds. With a roar not unlike a dragon's, I leapt through the air, my kangaroo part sending me flying at a rapid speed to slam into the monster and for my claws to dig into it's skin for a grip.

SHIIIIIT.

I'm the most idiotic person on this planet and the next. I didn't hurt it, only made it angrier. It thrashed about the saloon, smashing me into walls and creating quite a disastrous effect on the inside of the building. I was surprised the entire place hadn't fallen down yet. As I was tossed about like a ragdoll on this worm rodeo, I caught a blurred glimpse of Alamo. His hat had lifted up a smidge, revealing a unicorn's horn underneath. A silvery glow was about it, and from underneath his poncho, a weapon was drawn. I couldn't get a closer look at it, given my circumstances.

"Thanks fer the distraction, pardner. Just what ah needed..."

Immediately following his voice, a thundering crack erupted through the room, and something whizzed past my face. Three more of the sounds followed, and the monster groaned, slowing down as if in pain. I released my hold on it's back, falling to the ground, my feet making contact with a heavy clop of hoof and paw on wood. As I looked over at the pony who had probably just saved us both, I swear that dizzying ride had left me seeing things. Hovering in front of him, steadied in the air by his own silvery hold of magic, a revolver, one you would see in an old spaghetti-western flick, was smoking at the barrel as it unleashed another gunshot at the monster.

Guns. There were guns in Equestria. Oh how quickly my dreams of this land were crumbling, yet building as well.

In a flash, Alamo's aura had opened up the chamber and pulled ammo from an unseen source from underneath his clothing, placing the bullets in and reloading it in a flash. He fired six more shots, six more thunderous sounds and roars of pain from the worm. It slowly wavered in the air, only to collapse entirely to the ground, sinking back into the hole from whence it came.

The two of us approached the gaping chasm in the floorboards, I myself cautious, Alamo still holding his gaze of steel."Is it...dead?"I asked.

"Probably not."Alamo shrugged, twirling the revolver then holstering it back underneath the poncho.

"Should we....go after it?"

"Don't be stupid."He replied, his horn still glowing, his magic shuffling underneath his wardrobe in search for something. Seconds later, a long red tube with a string and a match appeared. My eyes widened as I backed up."Dynamite?! Who carries bloody dynamite around?!"

"Apparently ah do."The cowpony rolled his eyes, floating the matchstick over to my face, only to strike it against my scales to set it ablaze. I rubbed the spot where it had struck, expecting pain, only to feel another dull sensation, one you feel when your blood hasn't reached a spot on your body in a while, a numbness. Maybe the scales acted as some sort of natural armor, or at least a protectant to some degree.

He held the glowing match against the long string flowing out from the explosive, and once it was lit and sparks began to eat their way towards the end, Alamo quickly tossed it down the hole to follow the worm. He then was casually walking towards the exit of the saloon."We should go,"He said just as he pushed past the swinging doors."'less ya want ta blow up with this place too."

All the incentive I needed.

I rushed out just as the dynamite going off roared into my ears, a blast of heat and debris erupting behind me in a force that knocked me flat on my face. Oh yes, my time in Equestria thus far has been so wonderful. Falling down cliffs, very rude patrons, and even getting almost eaten by a giant worm! I'll have to get Discord a gift basket if I ever meet the spirit again.

Getting back to my feet and dusting sand off of my feathers, I began to take in account the damage that had been done while we were in the saloon. It had been a short affair, but the damage done to the small town had a large toll. It seemed most of those capable had driven off a bulk of the worms that had attacked, leaving holes of various sizes throughout the streets. Some buildings had collapsed from the quakes, while others showed signs of damage. A stream of wounded stallions, some bleeding, others even sporting some nasty bites where body parts had been, were heading back towards the hospital. Guess I won't have that room to myself anymore.

How had they done it? I wondered this to myself as I drifted around the town, no sign of anypony I was acquainted with. Alamo seemed to have dissapeared all together, the Sheriff was busy speaking with those who could stand after the attack, and the Doc was probably treating as many patients as he could before collapsing from fatigue himself.

As I surveyed them all, a few more facts made themselves known. Apparently, only unicorns could actually use firearms. From the handful of magic-users that I saw, since Appleloosa seemed to be a earth pony dominate town, each one carried some kind of pistol, six-shooter, or shotgun at their side. Their telekinesis allowed them to hold a gun just like a human could. Unfortunately, pegasi and earth were left out of the mix. Hooves weren't well known in the finger category. What they lacked in ambidexterity, they made for with sabers and blunt weapons. Some of the ponies held swords at their sides, some a simple chunk of wood, which I take they held in their mouths, or from some of the fanon use, ponies could hold weapons with their forelegs.

A grunt made my escape from thought to reality. I turned my head to see the Sheriff with his ample moustache approaching me."Oddjob, we're gonna need you ta hustle yerself over to my office, pronto."

I nodded and followed him over, entering the building just as we passed a stallion laying on his side on the dirt street nearby, his body still. I took him to be resting from the battle, only to realize that he was dead. A pool of dried blood was around a wound on the side that touched ground. At first, I didn't know what to think. A cartoon character was dead, and I felt it like it was real. I could even see the flies beginning to buzz around his body.

You owe me a perfect world, Discord.

Once inside, I found myself having to squat down due to the unaccommodating height of the room. The Sheriff trotted over to a desk and sat himself down behind it, Alamo Wall positioned leaning against the back corner, and an unknown pony sharing the western motif sitting in a chair next to an empty jail cell opposite of Alamo.

"Afternoon."The unknown pony tipped his hat at me. I nodded in reply. I wasn't that much of a talker anyway.

"Now, ah bet yer wonderin' what all that fuss was about..."The Sheriff said, his voice showing that he was contemplating something.

Another nod from myself, this time a bit more vigorous.

"Well, we've been havin' some critter troubles fer a while now..."

"Started back a few months ago. Nothing serious, they would pop in the horizon now and again to eat some of our crops,"The unknown pony continued where the Sheriff left off."But lately, they've been gettin' brave, more violent too. This has been the worst attack yet."

"Wurms. Tch."Alamo spat.

"We've seen word to Canterlot for aid, but nopony's replied."Unknown pony showed a bit of despair at the end of that sentence."Ah'm worried that before they send some of their knights over, there won't be any Appleloosa left ta save."

Sheriff shook his head."Now, don't go on say that in front of a guest, Deputy."

"Is there...anything we can do?"I asked with deep concern.

"We?"Alamo questioned."No pardner, not we as in includin' you, we as in just us. Appleloosa can take care of itself."

Ouch. Another blow to Oddjob.

"If we thought like that, we'd still be in struggle with the Buffalo."The Deputy retorted.

"Ah'm just sayin, we don't need no help from a freak like him."Alamo shrugged."The fool nearly got himself killed in the saloon earlier."

"Hey, I helped you!"I snapped, pointing my paw at him, a claw extending from the forefinger."You'd be worm chow if it wasn't for me!"

"Ah can handle myself. Just like Appleloosa can handle itself."He replied, heading for the exit."We don't need no help from any high-falutin Canterlot ponies, and we certainly don't need help from whatever you are!"He gave me one last glare before leaving.

"Please forgive him..."The Deputy gave me a nervous smile."Alamo's always been...reluctant ta newcomers. 'Specially one as...colorful as yerself."

I shrugged in reply, but it showed a bit of resentment in it. I knew I'd be getting a lot of that soon.

"Anyways..."The Sheriff continued with a sigh."The Buffalo have sent us some helpful information. Some of there trackers have found the Wurm Breeding Grounds in a cave not too far off from here. Maybe a day or two's walk..."

I knew where this was going. Plenty of television and video games have lent to that.

"We're gonna have ta send some ponies in to get rid of 'em if those Canterlot folk don't show up soon...."

Here it comes.

"And we're wonderin'...maybe you could help, Oddjob?"

There we go.

"Why me?"I questioned, furrowing my scaly brow.

"Well, we've always heard that dragons know there way around caves..."The Deputy continued his nervous grin, even sweating a bit as he spoke to him. Was my appearance that unsettling? Well, it did come from a chaos god."And those critters aren't that fond of fire...makes 'em shrivel up."

"I don't know..."I muttered. I didn't have the heart to tell them that I couldn't breathe fire, despite what the bestiary said.

"We need as much help as we can get."Sheriff went on."And if you could lend a hoof....or paw in yer case, Appleloosa would be forever grateful."

I sighed, and reluctantly nodded in agreement. I couldn't just go out and say no to the ponies that patched me up, now could I?

The Sheriff and Deputy immedietly perked up in mood."Good! We'll get you and a couple others geared up. Rest now, you set out tomorrow at the crack o' morning!"

Oh goody.

Comments

[Alpha Scorpii]

Well, the Appleloosians had to realize, sooner or later, that apple pies are not really useful as weapons.

Another great chapter. The story keeps getting more interesting.

[SpiralWriter]

498547
Or maybe we just don't realize the full destructive potential of pies yet.

And thank you^^

[Paladin Redflare]

I hope he leaves Appleloosa soon... I got 'nuf country stuff 'round here already... don't need no more, besides, ah just want 'im to tell people that he's a gosh dern.....whachacallit? I WANT 'IM TO BE MORE LIKE DISCORD!

[SpiralWriter]

499876

He'll be leaving Appleloosa soon in a few chapters. Don't worry, we haven't seen the end of Discord just yet

[Ernest Goes To Camp!]

Wonderful, I admire the shameful rip off of Rod's precious monologues from the Twilight Zone. This will definetly get me to read the story-wait...nvm.

[Wondrous Mind]

ok there have been three good chapters and that means i will give a thumbs up

[RubberBrony]

499052 Flaming Gunpowder pie perhaps?

[Menoshe]

499052

Like, pies that are really bombs?

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