Twilight stood up on shaky legs and approached the bars to her cell, hopeful that she might be able to at least request an audience with Princess Celestia. She just had to be calm and clear headed. "Please! If you just get Princess Celestia, there’s a rational explanation!"
So much for being calm…
The guard clenched his teeth together before firing off a blast of magic with his horn. “Shut up, you monster!”
Twilight flew back and slammed hard into the wall. She crumpled to the floor with a soft moan, gasping as she lifted a shaking hoof to touch her stinging, swollen left eyelid. Taking a brief moment of clarity, she felt three blisters forming around the stricken area. She winced as she tried to open her eye, quickly closing it again as the stinging overloaded her tolerance. Biting back tears, she shakily got to her hooves and walked back to the bars to face her jailer. "I beg of you—get Princess Celestia!"
“I said shut up, monster! We’re not as helpless as you think.” The guard snarled, his horn again glowing gray.
"Please, just listen to me! I'm not a changeling—I'm Twilight Sparkle!" Twilight looked up at him, a whimper escaping her lips. “You have to believe me.”
After a few moments the guard smiled and the cell door swung open. “I know one way to find out what you are!” He stepped into the cell, the door slamming shut behind him.
Twilight swallowed as she stared up at him. “H-how?”
“I’ll get you to tell me... and you’re gonna tell me everything.” The guard lowered his head to glare into Twilight’s remaining good eye. “And I mean everything.”
Twilight nodded quickly. “Of course! I'm Twilight Sparkle. My big brother is Shining Armor, and I'm Princess Celestia’s most prized and personal student. I-I’m also the bearer of the Element of Magic!”
The guard narrowed his eyes before striking her full across the face with the back of his hoof. “Try again, bug.”
Twilight’s yelped as her head snapped back from the force of the strike. She rubbed her tender face, the pain blossoming over her cheek and muzzle. “I’m not lying!” she cried. “I really am Twilight Sparkle. I-I live in Ponyville, and—”
As the second strike connected, she felt her cheek crack. A high cry escaped her, escalating into a continuous low whimper while she massaged the damaged bone. Twilight fell, staring at the floor as green ichor dripped out of her mouth. After a moment she spat out one of her fangs. With a shaky breath, she got back to her hooves, her muzzle trembling.
“I can do this all day, changeling.”
“I… I can't see out of my left eye. I-it’s hard to talk... I need a doctor. It hurts so much…” Twilight closed her eye tightly before letting out a sob. “Shining Armor… Please save me, BBBFF... save me.”
The guard raised his hoof for a third time, but lowered it as the dungeon door opened. A pegasus stallion walked in.
“Anything?” the new arrival asked.
Twilight’s aggressor shook his head. “Subject is uncooperative... to say the least.”
Having taken the precious seconds of distraction to compose herself, Twilight turned to the new guard. “Please get Shining Armor, I beg of you. My brother will be able to fix this. If I could talk to him for just a few minutes and answer some security questions, I know he will recognize me.”
The unicorn guard sneered. “Oh? You seem so sure of yourself, changeling. But answer me this: what if I told you it was Captain Armor himself who ordered us to do this?”
“I…” Twilight swallowed hard and shook her head vigorously. “No! Shining Armor would never do this! You must be lying. He’d only ever order somepony into holding! If he knew about what’s going on in here, he’d have you both replacing me in this cell.”
“Do you think us to be that stupid?” the guard asked. “You think we would give you a chance to let you play those games with the captain? Give you the chance to lie to and trick him?” With a snort, he turned his back to her.
Twilight watched as he turned away. Still massaging her cheek, she ignored her stinging eye and reached out to the guard. “I really mean it. If you’d just—”
The guard lifted his left hind leg and bucked in one fluid motion; Twilight’s tibia shattered under the impact, the sickening snap preceding her piercing screams.
“You really think we’re stupid don’t you, bug?” The pegasus guard snorted.
Twilight looked at him and hissed, baring her remaining fang before continuing to whimper and clutch at her ruined leg.
The unicorn lifted her into the air. “Let’s send a message that its Queen will feel!" he said, watching as Twilight squirmed in his magical grip, her good legs kicking out in hopes of catching his nose.
The pegasus grinned, his eyes roving over their captive. Green ichor oozed from her wounds as she struggled. “I like your thinking, Sergeant.”
Twilight ceased her flailing and whimpered, her good eye looking between the pair.
“Should we... blind it?” The pegasus guffawed at the sight of Twilight. She quickly shut her remaining eye defensively.
“Hmmm... No, I want it to see what’s coming,” the unicorn stated after a few seconds of thought.
The pegasus rubbed his chin. A few seconds later, he narrowed his eyes and stared at Twilight’s wings, buzzing erratically. “What about those bucking noisy wings? I really hate that sound.”
“I already have the perfect tool for that.” The unicorn clopped his forehooves together, the sound echoing through the cell. “This won’t take long.”
Twilight whimpered, her every thought hanging onto hope of escaping this with her life and sanity intact. “L-listen… I’ll do anything you want, just… you don’t have to d-do this. There’s still time to g-get Shining Armor… or Cadance… or P-Princess Luna… or Princess Celestia!"
The unicorn glared at her, his eyes blazing. “Y-you bucking monster... My patience with you is wearing extremely thin. If you say their names one more time you will regret it—I promise you that, bug!”
Twilight opened her eye, seeing naught but pure venom in the stallion’s eyes. This might be my last chance... She swallowed hard, looked up, and took a deep breath.
"Princess Celestiaaaaaa! Princess Luna, heeeelp! Caaada—”
The unicorn bucked her with both hooves this time, smashing her square in the face. Had Twilight not been held in the air she would have collapsed to the ground; instead she just hung there motionless, coughing and moaning. Her remaining fang fell out of her mouth, a green ichor following it to the floor.
The dungeon door swung open. Through her haze of pain and disorientation, Twilight barely heard the sound of a third set of hooves entering the cell. She tried to focus as she heard the galloping stop.
“Reporting, Sir!”
Twilight opened her eye, seeing the newcomer gave a crisp salute. She recoiled as she saw a glint off of his feathers.
The unicorn guard pointed a hoof at the broken changeling. “This one’s an escape risk,” he growled. “We’d better do something about those wings, soldier!”
The new guard gave a crisp nod, spreading his wings to reveal the blades beneath his feathers.
Twilight’s heart hammered in her chest, her pupils shrinking to the size of the sweat beading off her forehead. Whimpering, unable to turn away, her breath caught in her throat as time seemed to slow. The blades came to rest at the ready, poised near her left wing and eager to taste blood.
“No… please… you don’t have to… don’t do this…” She eyed her captors, each smiling with a malevolent gleam in their eyes. “I don’t want to die…”
“Do it.”
“I don’t want to die… I don’t want to die…”
The pegasus slammed the blades together.
Twilight’s howl filled the dungeons as the cold, merciless metal shore through her frail, sensitive wings, green liquid dripped from the fresh incision. She looked down, sobbing at the sight of her wingtip—still twitching—on the floor.
“I don’t want to die. P-please… I don’t want to d-die…”
“Then drop the charade!” the unicorn yelled, striking her in the stomach. Twilight gasped as she felt one of her ribs crack beneath his hoof. “Who are you really, and why are you here, scum? What is your plan?”
Twilight’s lip quivered, ichor still dripping from her open wound. “I t-told you alre-ready… I’m T-Twilight Sparkle… E-element bearer… Sister of S-Shining Armor… Please, I d-don’t want to die… I don’t want to die.”
The guard snorted and pulled his hoof back. “You’re a slow learner.” He looked to the pegasus again. “Lower, this time.”
“No! Don’t, please, d-don’t do it! I’ll do a-anything—”
“Anything except tell the truth, it seems,” the other pegasus said. He nodded at the blade wielder.
The dungeon filled with fresh screams and buzzing as the shears once more tore into Twilight’s wings. Her nerves were on fire, incinerating her pain receptors. Her eyes burned, hot tears were forcing their way through her ducts and pouring down her cheeks.
“Are you ready to be honest yet, filth?” the unicorn asked, pulling her in closer to his face. He pinned her legs together as he floated her within a foot of himself. “You can leave here either in pieces or in shards. Your call.”
“I don’t w-want to die… I don’t want to die… I don’t want to die...”
The blades moved toward her once again.
“I d-don’t want to die…”
The blades sheared through her wing as though it were paper.
Yeah, no. That warning was not lying. That's some heavy shit you just wrote there. Well done!
So this is where the gore tag comes into play: it's a very dramatic chapter ... but I don't know whether Shining Armour would order such cruelty to be carried out on any being ... or not?
I hope that Twilight will be alright.
7389846
Thank you very much!
7389849
I'll answer that one right now. No, he simply ordered her to be taken to a holding cell. The fact of what just happened to Twilight. Is those three making the decision to do so. Though the third one is a bit less guilty as he was just following orders... Kinda?
7389846
Yeah, thank you! I could not have done this without Adren. What I originally had was... Awful until he stepped in and helped me get this done!
This better have an update fast
the link at the end seems a bit excessive.
7389849
It begs the question, hey? Did he order it? Or is the guard just a psychopath and figured that telling Twilight he was under orders would never be investigated?
Edit: goddamnit, Foals.
good story, I do hope to see someone come in save her, I half expect for Luna to come out of the shadow to save her near start of the next chapter, or cadence come in....
7389870
I admit it is a bit. But Adren added it in after he helped me write this chapter. It fit extremely well and still gives me goose bumps to listen to it. After reading this chapter.
7389867
*opens gdoc to start work on chapter 6* I'm just about to get started on it.
7389858 Well, the end result is undeniable. I have not reacted that strongly to such a scene in a long time, and I read a lot of Dark/Gore.
I very rarely downvote stories, but having ponies willing torture a begging creature is one of the things that will get me to do so.
7389902
I wish I could convince you to continue reading as this is just a small part in a much larger story. But I do understand. I can however assure you that said scene will never occur again and said ponies will get what is coming to them.
I don't like torture either, but in this case I felt it was necessary for the progression of this story. Have a good day though Canary.
7389902
A necessary evil for the plot, I'm afraid. Please don't let a couple of minor characters doing unspeakable things ruin the story for you. This is in no way a representation of the rest of what's to come.
Well, at least consider it. If it means anything, the content was incredibly hard on a personal level to to produce, and harder still for Foals to publish.
7389915
The story is less than 20k words long, not tagged dark, yet it has a torture scene of the protagonist. Why was it plotted out? What could necessitate using this plot point to drive the rest of the story? If it is no way a representation of the rest of what's to come, why was it included at all?
That's why I downvoted based on it. It seems to be something done for cheap drama, and nothing more. The fact that it's claimed that it is non-representative only adds to that impression.
Goddamn. I wasn't expecting this. This is good. Hell, I would upvote twice if I could.
I'm waiting at the edge of my seat for the next chapter.
10/10.
Edit: Congratulations on getting to the featured box!
7389920
True, but that's because it's not an inherently dark story. Notice though the [Gore] and [Drama] tags, the former of which is purely for this scene and the latter of which is the main genre. The story is tagged accurately.
Can't wait for the next chapter.
I really hope those guards receive the same as they dished out
Two updates in as many days? What dark sorcery is- OH MY GOD!
...this was not a chapter to read during my lunch break.
7389991
*offers gentle hugs and cute pictures* The next chapter is being written right now. They will not get away with it.
Yeah, okay another stupid torture porn "it was all a misunderstanding" story defiantly not going to read any more.
7390086
Come back when you've outgrown the kiddie pool.
7389999
By "they will not get away with it", you mean "they will be summarily executed in as painful and slow a way as possible"?
7390239
Given that it'll take Luna all of five seconds to confirm her identity once she starts dreaming, and considering what they just did to Celestia's Most Loyal Student and Daughter Figure, I suspect that a public execution would be them getting off lightly.
7390237 Alright see you in 35 years.
bueno . la rescata crisality o celestia ?
se entera pero no creo que sera pronto , va a pasar un tiempo antes que ella sea rescatada ?
por lo que esta pasando a menos que en ese momento llegue alguien que quiera la verdadera informacion y no torturar por odio. asi que esperamos pronto la siguiente , que no sea en un año plz .
sera posible maximo 1 semana ?
lo que a ocurrido es algo que no se puede negar , twi va vivir que los ponys no todos son buenos y los changeling son los malos aunque falta ver que tipo de changeliing son y como va a avanzar la historia , es la parte 1 ahora viene lo siguiente quedara con secuelas o solo ... bueno a veces solo se necesita un motivo por que unirte al enemigo , si los tuyos te traicionan , lo tienes en luna . estoy ... con las emociones al flor de piel no se , quiero salvarla !!!
pero ... esa sera tu decision .
good. does it rescue her crisality or celestia?
does he/she find out but don't I believe that it will be soon, a time will pass before she is rescued?
for that that this happening unless in that moment somebody that wants the true information arrives and not to torture for hate. so we wait the following one that is not in one year plz soon.
will possible maximum be 1 week?
what is something that cannot refuse, twi had happened goes to live that the ponys not all are good and the changeling is the bad although he/she lacks to see that changeliing type is and like the history will advance, it is now the part 1 he/she comes the following it was with sequels or alone... good sometimes alone a reason is needed for that to unite to the enemy, if yours betray you, you have it in moon. I am... with the emotions to the skin flower not you, I want to save her!!!
but... that it will be your decision.
7390293
Given that Celestia should have been contacted immediately as per her own orders, and that guards aren't supposed to perform interogations at all, and that she's asking to see somebody who could completely scuttle her claim if it were false, and that what they're doing is almost certainly extremely illegal regardless of circumstances, etc... I'm going to have to say these guards are changelings trying to drive a wedge between Twilight and those she loves. Or it's a 'ripped from the headlines' bit on Amareican police.
If they're actual guards doing their jobs, it's bad writing.
They won't be executed. They'll be sent to Tartarus - Equestria is fully capable of condemning their criminals to burning in hell for all eternity, and has clearly done so on many occasions.
What...the....fuck.......Again, why don't they just listen to her with a lie detector or something? IT'S LESS PAINFUL AND QUICKER THAN THIS....OMFG i don't even know what THIS is.
7390813
Fear of changelings so soon after the invasion made these guards react badly. It's a common thing that happens after invasions. I will tell you that there will be no more scenes like this. I needed this scene to get the story to move forward. Do I regret it? Yes... I hate hurting charaters but I believe it show cases just how dangerous fear can be.
whats going to follow is not only the healing of Twilight after said event but also the healing of the city itself because such hate can only lead to disaster. The ponies went against orders and reacted out of hate something that is very bad if its left to simmer.
I hope you don't decide to stop reading due to this chapter, i'm already working on the next chapter I plan to get it up within the week.
Fear is one thing. Having three professionals disobey orders and resort to physicaly beating and torturing and individual, inflicting extreme and potentially life-threatening injury, without any apparent hesitation or debate, and almost certainly knowing that their actions were both extremely illegal and certain to be discovered, it just comes across as heavy handed and clumsy. It feels shallow. More "designated villain" than thoughtful commentary.
Rough handling, insulting behavior, and denying basic comforts, possibly with a slightly less united front from the guards themselves, would get the same message across rather more elegantly, I think.
Looks like Canterlot is soon to be getting three new statues for the statue garden.
And yeah, I bet that was hard to write, indeed. Cruelty like that gets me all twisted up inside. Poor Changelight.
7390878 had this in my box for ages thought it was abandoned glad to see its back keep up the good work
7390926
It may have, I regret not considering it. I was more going in the vein that history has shown reactions to invaders. An example is what the Russians did to Nazis after World War two... What is in my story is nothing compared to that.
I can't say I loved writing this. I didn't, I've been working on this for about a year now. Writing and rewriting it until I finally begged for help. All I can say is that Twilight will heal and things will become understood. So please keep reading if you would? I'm working on the next chapter as i'm typing this.
7390878 Oh no, i'll keep reading it. It's just that seeing these thing happen to ponies and changelings alike who done nothing wrong just makes me sick in my mind (Not my stomach, otherwise i will throw up up my dinner) and makes me feel like a villain for reading that one part. I'm glad there will be no more scenes like that, because if there were, then i think my mind won't take anymore guilt from something like this, especially if Twilight was turned into a changeling Or worse still, Fluttershy turned into a changeling and also having to deal with that. (I'm also going to keep reading this because i love changeling stories that make the changelings considered a good guy and stop this kind of madness going though the less interesting (And even stupider than diamond dogs because of all the things they do first in stories, like if you are evil looking or have powers that were used incorrectly or something; INSTANT STONING!!! Or if there is a dragon or any kind of animal that is dangerous to these creatures are that just wants to help them; IMMEDIATELY HUNTED!!!) pony kind. Now i'm not trying to say that ponies are worse than any 2nd rated evil villain (Even though i just did, i'm just making my point.), but they're up there all because of their cowardness and hatred that SOMEPONIES take a little too far BLUEBLOOD YOU MOTHER FUCKER!!!. But i'll keep reading this story, and i'll be rooting for Twilight the changeling because she is awesome.
7390983
I think the problem with your comparison example is that, in that case, it wasn't disobeying orders, and usually wasn't illegal--and even when it was technically against orders or law, it was never enforced, if it was even discovered at all. If Celestia had a history of turning a blind eye or even rewarding such behavior, that would be one thing (Though... not a good thing, for different reasons), but otherwise, this is a very different situation.
7391120 Also, no one has ever accused the Russians of being too soft and nice for their own good. Ponies, though?
You know, what I don't get is, if you are already aware that people don't want to see this kind of thing, enough so that you'd put a warning label in front of it, why did you waste your and our time writing that kind of garbage anyway?
I just realized something. The cover art doesn't have wings. Foreshadowing?
I didn't like this chapter, not because it had torture in it, because it ONLY had torture in it. Barely anything of substance was actually achieved in this chapter.
7391501
Agreed, I hope you'll enjoy the next chapter more. No torture lots of substance. I have insomnia a bit so i'm working on it right now.
7391120
Agreed, I maintain that hate and fear can make someone or in this case some pony do things they never would but it DOES come across as mere police brutality. I wanted it to be more so I hope the following chapters will help with that.
7391398
Heh, that cover is stand in for my real cover art. Been saving it for a long time *grin*
7391363
I put the warning because if I didn't i'd have alot more pissed off readers then I do right now. Much like with movies and TV is a discretion warning.
7391250
I agree, It is entirely possible I had them go to far. In fact there was a much reduced version of this that I had written. I decided to put this one up to show just how much fear and hate the ponies feel for the Changeling race. Though that seems to have back fired on me a bit.
I gotta say, Twilight better get herself some justice for this. If we just forget about these three, I'm gonna be pissed.
if those guards aren't stripped of all ranks and made to scrub toilets with a toothbrush the rest of their days in the service, I think I'll have to pack up and call it a day. That kind of treatment is not justified, for any reason... those points is are no better than ISIS or any other terrorist at this point.
7391524
Was it too far? Maybe. But it is done, and now we have to deal with a crippled Twilight Sparkle who will never fly. There is a lot that can be done with that angle, including but not limited to turning her back into a pony as an Alicorn Princess... with crippled wings.
That aside, we all seem to have forgotten who will really be smiting these buffalo droppings. They have deprived Rainbow Dash of a potential flying partner. They will pay!
si has visto la lista de shiler , el pianista, y otras de la segunda guerra veras que cuando capturan a antes o despues la tortura que pones es pequeña a lo que se ocurre , twily al pasar por ese tipo de situacion ,
tienes el motivo por que tendra miedo a que si sera aceptada o tendra que huir, como otros que comentamos , creo que poner lo que pasa un prisionero sea no de invasion
,guerra o cualquier tipo de cautiverio lo que paso ella deja pensando y deseando justicia no hay que olvidad que hay una diferencia entre justicia a venganza y eso ponis se fueron por la segunda.el episiodo esta bien no necesita que quites nada por que cumple su cometido .
if you have seen the shiler list, the pianist, and others of the second war truth that when they capture to before or later the torture that you put is small to what you happens, twily when going by that situation type,
you have the reason for that he/she will be afraid to that if it will be accepted or he/she will have to escape, as others that we comment, I believe that to put what a prisoner happens is not of invasion
, war or any captivity type what I happen she leaves thinking and wanting justice is not that you forget that there is a difference among justice to vengeance and that ponis left for second ,the cap. this doesn't need you to remove anything for that it completes its made.
Cool chapter. The feels are rich here. A.k.a. Le Me is sad. And demented as hell.