An open flame and a lot of gas was all it took to kill me. After my death, I discovered I wasn't in my home, or my body. Then I believed I was in the game Half Life 2, then...well I don't know anymore. After discovering what I assumed were horses, I tried to communicate. Then it ended up with me losing my nerve and hiding from them while staring from afar. Creepy I know. But can you blame me?
I'm stuck in an Advisor's body. A being that's built for killing and commanding. But for some odd reason...I don't feel distraught over it.
(Special thanks to my EPIC Editor ultra1437)
(Notice how LONG the first hundred paragraphs are...that's normal.)(HAH! MY IMAGE IS NOW FILLED WITH GORE!)
Chapters (2)
Sorry this one took so long to get out, but my lazy bum was sick. Blame me, not Gear for this one not being out roughly a week ago.
3925389
Oi it took about 30 days worth of procrastinating before I was able to finish the first chapter which took one afternoon! Also a little revising the next morning.
So yea...mostly my fault. I've been asking for this for a while now.
Has this adviser killed Eli yet? Freak of nature
3927126
.....I love Eli...but christ do I love advisors more.
Fuck yeah, I'm the 123rd viewer!
Oh, and good story, too.
I recommend revising this...
and this.
Interesting story sir. I am no stranger to the unusual fiction so I have to say that I am impressed. The only issue I can see is that this fiction will only catch the attention of a select few, due to the content and writing style.
Overall I like what you did with combining the minds of the advisor. (physical body and similar mental pathways, like a lack of fear or surprise, combined with his mind)
That's all the input I got right now, I'm tired.
So how long till update?
I see potential. I believe no one has ever written an encounter story quite like that. I enjoyed it.
3928174
Not bad at all. The feelings seem right, his thoughts and actions seem logical, I don't know why you'd be worried.
3928595
I am not worried in the slightest. I merely observed that very few stories follow a logical first encounter strategy. It is a refreshing change of pace and was even interesting to watch.
3928021
Same thought.
3928174
Thanks for that.
3930109 thou shall record more of thy protagonists adventures! *bad luna acting*
Finally, this story is resurrected.
The old idea was good, and now this one, just brilliant. Ok, I know this slower than the previous but more detailed. Oh man, I can't wait how you describes the concept of first contact. Here, take this Headcrab, you deserve it buddy. Do not forget to feed him.
25.media.tumblr.com/0c6ed3037becba9bbdcbd61ad90f997a/tumblr_mib0iuDaK51qcb7k0o1_500.gif
Wow, he loves watching ponies.
Does this mean he's a bean STALK?
Ehuh? Ehuh? Eehhhhh?
Get it? Because the references to the... bean and the erm.
I'll go now.
3930627 Please stay. I need more bad jokes.
3930579 LAMAR?!?!? You can tell :D no teeth, ALSO HEADCRAB GIF HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN BY MY WONDEROUS BLUE EYES!
...ok they're brown and filled with regret and bad karma.
this story is incredamazing.
3927992
Thank you for that. I'll get to fixes as soon as possible.
3928608
Whoops, I actually meant for that to be to the author. Sorry.
interesting...I will read this
Interesting!
More
The advisor,The only thing to NOT want to aim for headshots......Well,Outside of melee,In melee it can just munch your brain and insta-kill ya
I have never understood the obsession with the Eiffel tower. It is just a big radio tower that doesn't even serve a purpose.
This is definitely interesting, and I feel as though your writing style compliments the protagonist.
3937566
I forget why it was so popular, but I'm sure it has to do with the wire frame stuff things whatever....yea I forget.
3939495
3937566
It was built as one of the main Centerpieces of the 1889 World's Fair 100 years after the Storming of the Bastille, which is generally considered to be the symbolic begining of the French Revolution. It also served as the Entrance Arch to the World-Fair grounds. It quickly became one of the most easily recognized structures in the world and a massive tourist draw. As such it quickly became a symbol of French democracy, strength and pride. Even though this year it will have been 125 years since it was completed it is still the tallest structure in Paris.
3988682
Oh right it was because it was the tallest structure in Paris. More that fact than the others but they helped. Since it was taller more people could see it and it soon became associated with the capital.
SEE I KNOW THESE THINGS!
But yea that's cool of you to look that up.
(if you say you knew it was the Centerpiece of the 1889 world fair through memory I'll crush your soul)
3991963 I did know it was one of the centerpieces for Paris's world fair. I didn't remember the year though, found it out when I looked up the rest. Only reason I remember though is because I remember seeing an old postcard of it when it was still covered in cloth and banners for the fair.
I'm loving this story! When can we expect to see the next chapter?
4017720
After my school work is all caught up...and then I need to stop playing fallout new vegas.
Then I need to update at least two other stories.
Busy schedule for me.
4018129 Wow. You really have a lot of stuff to do... That's a pain for sure... Also, might I recommend posting this on the Game Crossovers group? Since this has a Combine Advisor from Half Life 2, I would assume this story counts as a game crossover. I'll give you a link to the group.
Here ya go: http://www.fimfiction.net/group/134/game-crossovers
4034093
I think you can add any story you want to any group you're currently in. I personally wouldn't want to do it myself because I feel like I'm just forcing my work on others. Now if another person were to add it to a submissions folder or the respective folder of the group then I won't object. I wasn't the one spreading it around. (Honestly I've seen some of my stories get thrown into groups I've never heard of before...it's humbling)
You can add it if you feel it belongs there.
But yea another reason is because I don't know all the groups on the site, just the ones I've got general interest in (like the HiE group) or stuff I happened to help start off (like Good HiE List).
4034868 If I can submit ANY story to ANY group I'm in, then I can't find the thing that allows you to do that. I have been on this website a while, but there might still be some things I don't know.
4034983 You see the tiny horizontal bar where the "Characters" are listed? Move your eyes a little to the left where you see the exclamation point in an orange yield symbol. The button to the very left of that is the add to group. It looks like a folder. To the left of that is statistics, clicking that shows you what dates people liked and viewed the story most. It's pretty interesting to look at when a stories finished and stuff.
4035330 Thanks! Also, a little while back, I started a thread on what would happen if Celestia, Luna, and Discord met a Combine Advisor, and I those viewers who don't know much about them might want to check it out. Here's the link. http://www.fimfiction.net/group/134/game-crossovers/thread/96291/what-if-discord-celestia-and-luna-met-a-combine-advisor-halflife-crossover#comment/2981759
Dont tell me that the fic is already dead.
4183470 It's already dead.
But no I just need to rewrite the first two chapters. I've already got three underway but I'm putting that on hold until I edit these and update my other story.
4183711 Do you plan rewriting these chapters in the nearest future? Also I have a suggestion. Try making this story end in about 20 or less chapters or it will get boring. (What I mean that there are fanfics that had a good idea, but they just go onand wont stop, until it hits 250 chapters and gets a sequel)
4186489 sure?
I honestly don't know how many chapters this will be. I have a few scenarios lined up but since I'm not writing it right now I can't say for certain that it's going to get passed 20. I can tell you that it will NEVER be over 100 chapters long. I get too much stuff done in just one of my chapters so the chances of me getting to 100+ are very slim. Now if it were a self insert and I were going off of literally ALL the possible things I could do then...maybe I'd surpass 250.
But yea you don't need to worry about length. I'm not going to be that dedicated to this story.
4187396 um... so is there an estimated time till the next chapter is released?
4210893 Nope. But don't worry, I have the next instance of this story thought out. So when I do get to writing it. It'll be worth the read.
4223114 Okay... will it be within this century?
How about this year?
4225244 duh
4226867 good, now how about this week?