• Member Since 25th Dec, 2013
  • offline last seen Mar 1st, 2019

Silver Melodies


God has blessed the world with three things: Pizza, Internet, and Ponies. It has been scientifically proven that, without these things, life would cease to exists, for sure.

T
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They were going to have a normal day. But Discord wanted to have fun. He couldn't stay 'good', he's the King of Chaos! So he decides to round up the main six and many other ponies and put them into a game.

In this game, they will either kill or be killed simple, as that. Last pony standing wins. Discord will accept no pleas, and will show no mercy as he messes with their surroundings and even their minds.

What will happen when everything Fluttershy knew and wanted is ripped away and replaced with a bloody, gruesome new reality, if only for a moment? Can her mind peaceful mind cope, or will it bend and snap, learning to think like a mind of the dark.

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 41 )

pinkamena showing up just got you a favorite and like and maybe a follower my friend :pinkiecrazy:

3859246 Ya and I don't know why but out of my 84 favorite fics I just couldn't bring my self not to put this in my top 10. again I don't know why maybe its the concept, maybe its pinkamena :pinkiecrazy:, or maybe its the fact that I love a good dark story. regardless great story and I await its next chapter! gunna check out your other stuff now to see if I like that as well. :pinkiesmile:

Ok, I read this as one of Little Wood's suggestions. It is the first gore and horror MLP fic I've read. It is quite suspenseful and leaves you wondering what's next. I have to get used to the major darkening of the mane six characterizations but I guess that comes with horror stories. *spoilers* Wow, monster Rarity and Pinkie gone Pinkamena. *end spoilers*

Critiques: There are a few cases of grammar trouble such as saying "wired" when "weird" was intended or "beats" when "beasts" was meant. Perhaps go back and comb through for such things. Transitions could be a little more elaborate, such as after the picnic at the beginning things going dark for Fluttershy. Suddenly dark then light. It's a bit hard to explain but hopefully you get what I mean. I also found myself wanting to be a little more clued about Applejack's crossbow, but I guess she found it in another room and that could suffice.

Final thought: Fluttershy evolves quite interestingly from her mild mannered self to a quick thinking survivalist. Cool. All in all, the story builds anticipation for the next development well enough. The next installment should be interesting!

3865512 Thanks! So I suppose you liked it a little bit? If this was your first horror story, I don't want to leave a bad impression on all horror stories.

I enjoyed it.

Is it bad that I want pinkamena to win? :pinkiecrazy:

Moar moar moar moar moar :flutterrage:

Wow didn't expect that ending and it was a great one. My favorite part of the fic was easily the fact that discord regreted his actions :fluttercry: to me that is what made the ending for me it changed it from an average ending to a great ending. Great job :pinkiehappy:

She would probably keep talking until she ran out of words in like, about twenty minutes, or one of her friends stopped her.

'Like' is unneeded. Using words like that looks messy. Get rid of the like and the comma directly following it and you should be fine.

Also, why is Fluttershy in the game? She's Discord's only friend! It would have made more sense for everypony else to be teleported without her.

Other than that, a great story :twilightsmile:

He payed close attention to Fluttershy. One of the main reasons he set this game was to break that kind mare. The way she tried to 'convert' him, it was just so annoying. She was always kind. Never hurt a soul. Blegh.

I take back my previous critique on this topic.

Also:
You managed to make a STORY feel like I'm watching a horror movie. Jumpscares and all.
How did you manage to put a JUMPSCARE in a STORY???

Holy...









Ok I'm done with everything labeled 'dark' for a while now.
*immediately forgets this and moves on to The Secret Life of Rarity because I'm an idiot*

OH CELESTIA IS THE PONY IN THE COVER ART RARITY???

4142767 Yes... the whole reason why Fluttershy is in the games becomes crystal clear at the end. I hope you're enjoying this as much as I assume you are...

4143097 Yeah I liked it. It was a great story
Just
Uh
I didn't need sleep tonight anyways.

4143192 I have no idea how I put a jump scare in this story... it just...

*magical pixie dust sound*

happened...

H-h-how could u-u-u make m-m-me c-c-c-c-r-r-r-y-y???:fluttercry::fluttercry:

4331200 Um... uh... I... OH LOOK! PINKIE PIE!

:pinkiecrazy:

Oh, that's Pinkimena... um... Fluttershy?

:fluttershyouch:

Oh yeah... last try... Twilight?

:facehoof:

4331210 *sniff* I... G-g-guess u didn't do it on -p-p-purpose :fluttershysad::fluttercry::fluttershysad::fluttercry:

4333692 Well... I wouldn't say I wasn't trying... maybe...

4333705 WHAT THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING!!!!!!!how could u toy with me like that!!!!!! I must say u did made me cry more then I do when I read something this sad....:fluttercry::fluttercry:

4333753 I mean u got many emotion for the every pony die in the story MY HEART BROKE WHEN FLUTTERSHY FUCKING DIEDso yeah :3 :twilightblush:

4333794 Glad I could make you cry! ... wait... uh... I mean... :twilightoops:

4333916 Merp.um I actually like crying it lets all my emotions out on my favorite ponys soo um this?:twilightblush::pinkiehappy:

4333930 Let's put a SMILE on that face... :pinkiecrazy:

4334000 Why is she happy? Uh... I am confuse... :derpytongue2:

If only, if only the woodpecker sighs
The bark on the tree was as soft as the sky
And the wolf waits below, hungry and lonely
He cries to the moon if only, if only

If only by Fiction Plane

Id say for a alternate send in my badass oc who walks up to discord from a portal from hell and says he can undo fluttershys death but at a cost discords life and yes i said hell my guys part demon

This story need more views! A lot more. If someone read this and put in effects and everything and posted it on youtube, it would get seriously popular. It is a well-written short gore story. I need more. Luckily this site is filled with awesome stories like this.

oh no I have a VERY bad feeling about this which involve fluttershy being the monster I HOPE I'M WRONG!

umm... discord...YOU ATE THE PRINCESSES!AND NOPONY NOTICED!!!

WHAT DID YOU DISCORD?!WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY FLUTTERSHY!?!

I think there were a few too many ponies with the addition of some OCs (Glaze, Tomb, and Mic), which stretched out things a bit. Would've probably been better as Mane 6 + siblings (including Scootaloo). That said, Derpy had the most impactful death aside of Fluttershy herself.

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