• Published 29th Jan 2014
  • 1,223 Views, 18 Comments

Fallout: Equestria - Beyond the Looking Glass - Prorook363



A Crystal Pony is plunged into the Equestrian Wasteland alongside her Stallion companion and must endure the hardships of a cold, desolate world. But how long can innocence thrive in a world of dread and misery?

  • ...
4
 18
 1,223

II. Shattered Glass

"Even the dead have Dreams..."

For days we walked without purpose. Although silence longed to be our companion, Orion and I rejected its call as we pondered on the remnants of the old world.

It was terrifying, but I could not help but be so curious. What became of this world so long ago? What was it that drove this world to the brink of destruction, and made it so the sun can never rise and must be hidden behind the cold sheath from above?

Even Orion, the stallion who taught me so much of our own Stable that I was ignorant of, knew nothing that could help ease my questions.

“I don’t know…I don’t doubt what happened out here was no different from what happens inside our Stable.” he said on one particular time as we raided an old rundown home. We were thirsty, and irradiated water was becoming a frequent delicacy for the two of us.

“What do you mean by that?” I asked curiously.

“The overmares are ponies who tend to rule on opposite ends. They always seem to be against another member, and when that happens, there’s usually small conflict between newly created factions.”

“I never knew that happened in the Stable…” I remarked, inferring how blinded I was by my innocence.

“It has. And eventually, when the tension subsides, everypony returns back to their daily routines.”

Orion then looked at me with a saddened expression, as if it hurt him to know this. “But ponies just don’t forget. The issues rise again later on, and soon there is conflict elsewhere. And when that happens, the overmares seem to take advantage of that and rule ideas that…”

By then, Orion had noticed how my mind had struggled to follow through with his ideas. So he quickly moved on as he let out a heavy sigh.

“…Sorry…but what I honestly think happened to this world, was that ponies were not willing to let go of the past and move on to secure a future..”

He then moved a few pots aside to look inside a faded oven that was shaded in differing hues of pink and blue. Water bottles managed to find a way in their sometimes.

“Why should they forgive though?” I said, causing Orion to slowly lift his head out, “I mean, if they were offended by something, there has to be a reason they were…”

Orion glanced at me with a studious expression, one that either admired my idealism or lashed at my stupidity.

“Sometimes, ponies aren’t offended, Starlight. Sometimes they’re just afraid or angry…maybe even angry for being afraid, or maybe for the other way around...”
My ears tilted in curiosity. “What do you mean Orion?”

“Some ponies are just afraid that there way of life will be changed, and because of that, even if the change may be for the better, they fight against it. They fight to hold onto what they have at the moment, but don’t think about the next day or the day after that. It’s because they’re afraid that they hold onto little things that they think will always last forever, when really they won’t. And because of that, they destroyed themselves.”

Orion gave me a long look, hoping to see that I understood what he was saying. Believing he had given his message, he turned away from me and moved towards a large moldy refrigerator.

But I did not comprehend his message.

In fact, those words stung me, and to hear it from Orion caused my gut to churn tightly.

“…But we left the Stable because we were scared Orion" I reminded, “That’s why we left.”

Orion lifted his head away from the refrigerator, but he did not turn back in my direction. It was evident that he did not count on that idea, for he stood their silently for a few seconds before he was able to say something.

“We weren’t scared Starlight…I only wanted to secure our future.”

He turned to me after he spoke and gave me a warm smile, one that melted away the burden that was slowly begin to harden over my mind.

We soon found four bottles after that discussion, but as we left that house Orion’s words occasionally drifted in and out of my head.

And as I began to ponder, my mind seized the opportunity.

Fear. Beautiful isn’t it? Can turn even the holiest of souls into the most careless. Do you realize why you fear death? Do you? Because you resent beauty. You want to take things into your own hooves, hold the world at your whim as you indulge in luxury while the others around you dwell in misery. How could you have been so sullen when you had it all, and everyone else had none?”

My mind had become violent, and it became distant, almost as if it was a separate entity. I fought those thoughts as best as I could as I felt Orion’s soothing answer crumble away into ashes.

I began to fight my mind, telling myself how I wanted to live because I loved the feeling of living. It wasn’t because of anything else. When I began to make friends, all material things became meaningless, and luxury meant nothing. But the voice always returned, saying my friends were nothing more but pawns and illusions to delude me from my construed reality.

My mind wanted me beaten. And as survival became an issue, it was striving for the kill.

{***}

The week soon passed as I had remembered counting the days and nights, standing beside Orion as the two of us continued to wander aimlessly. Though we had our moments, Orion and I had kept firm and united as we had when we first left the Stable. All was well for the both of us.

The broken streets and hollow houses soon became natural for me. I became numb to the oddly colored sky, and by some cherishment of luck, we always found enough food and water to keep us alive and healthy. They had even found weapons, but Orion stayed clear of such ‘destructive weaponry’. I remember asking him why he refused to take a weapon, and he humbly replied,

“The only reason I would need weapon is to hurt somepony. And the only other pony out here besides me is you. I don’t want to risk that…I don’t.”

As time passed, I came to believe that maybe the wasteland was indeed a giant garden for the two of us to enjoy. It was a thought that actually returned the glow I once had before, although it was still a faint beating pulse. Orion was astonished by its merits, but thought nothing unusual of it.

We were certainly becoming filth-ridden though. Our coats became mangled and grotesque, even turning Orion’s blue mane into a sickly blue. And the smell...

We soon passed through another small town, and Orion and I conditionally ventured inward without thought. The streets were typically empty, and not a single living thing was found. We had nothing to worry about.

The houses of this town were aligned across from one another, and the streets seemed to have filled with dirt that poured over the cracks. It was like a ghost town, the kinds I remember in a comic called “Blazing Saddles”.

I gave it no thought though and continued on.

“I very much doubt you’ll find water here, let alone to wash yourself with.” I shot as Orion rummaged about in a large delicate room. It was elegant, or at least it had been before the war.

“Oh, c’mon all you need to be is a little hop- err, I mean positive.”

The term hope had come to be a cursed word for me, one that gave me chills given by its background. The word hope had become an associate of my predisposed execution, and I wanted no reminder of that idea in the newfound garden. To hear it was like the sound of a heavy tomb bell, the kind that was used at the funerals of ponies back at the Stable.

“…Well you can try upstairs. Typically there is a chance that it’s on a drawer or desk.”

“Sometimes it makes you wonder why ponies left it there before the war…” Orion fascinated, turning away from the large room and trotting up the broken stair case. He stepped carefully over each plank, which gave a light creak that caused me to flinch out of worry for his well-being. But eventually he made it to the top and quickly disappeared into the room.

As he ascended to the top, I waited down below. I glanced around the large room once more, looking to see if maybe Pyro overlooked any places. He had a tendency to overthink or undermine things in all the wrong situations.

I ran my hooves over the aged flooring, looking for loose floor boards that harnessed hidden supplies. Scavenging became second nature for the both of us; we could have found that proposed needle in a haystack if we truly wanted to.

That is why, after a minute of tossing furniture and pulling things apart, I found something. But it was not something to keep us hydrated.

No, it was a shining, metallic orb, adorned in crystals that accumulated dust around its flawless shape. It was hidden beneath a floorboard, as suspected, but it was so strange to find something like that.

The metal finish was so prestigious, it seemed that only dust was able to bind itself to the crystals, and even that they did poorly at. I peered closer, hoping to catch a glimpse of even the slightest spectacle of dust but that was a terrible move. As I moved my head closer, I felt a slight humming noise ring in my ear and I felt vibrations whir through my head. Before I could even ponder on the feeling, a rush of light, energy, and force rammed through my head and shot through my mind.

It was all so quick, that I immediately felt nothing and everything at the same time as I watched images unfurl before me.

(^-*><*-^)

Without warning, I found myself holding a mare and kissing her in embrace. It was a strange feeling, and I strongly attempted to pull away from it, but my body did nothing while my mind only returned like an elastic band. It soon ended though, so the discomfort left as quickly as it came.

“I want you to care for your little colt, okay?” the wife cooed as she flashed her green eyes in my direction. I remain puzzled, ignorant of what to say, until a voice spoke for me.

“I will watch over him today. Everything will be fine, I assure you.”

I tried to turn and look, but I found myself only able to stare straight ahead. It was then that I realized I was the male. And I was living in his hooves.

The orb, whatever it was, was a memory of a pony.

Of who? I did not know. But I think I was going to find out.

“I don’t know Shacks” the mare continued worriedly, “this whole conflict and war…it’s getting pretty bad. Not too long ago there was an attack on equestrian soil, in a public area where mothers, foals-”

“You worry too much. This war will come and pass. The system has evolved and taken necessary precaution to adapt to this new world.”

“Okay, if you say so.”

The female looked disturbed, and with good intention. This was an orb that was possibly hundreds of years old, and it possibly could have answered questions I longed to know.

Time went on as the mare and “I” began to talk until finally (after yet another uncomfortable embrace) she departed, leaving me and her stallion alone in their house.

The stallion, after shifting around for quite some time and moving about, lifted his hoof and moved something aside. A bright ray penetrated my eyes and it stunned me how vibrant the light was. It was so strong that I felt its warmth press against my own real skin.

When my eyesight returned, I found myself staring upward from a large window, staring outward into a narrow road and small houses that aligned directly from one another. Ponies walked about jubilantly as green grass surrounded their houses, and it gave a sensation of tranquility that could not be broken. It might have very well been called tranquility lane.

For a while the stallion just stared outward, doing or saying nothing as I sat there in his mind. He just stood there, inhaling the glorious sight that managed to leave me breathless. For this was the garden I dreamed of.

A small voice echoed through my ear, a voice that caused my heart to skip a beat. My host turned down to see a small little brown foal walking in, with a smile that could warm any heart and eyes that could melt even the coldest of souls.

I felt a strong feeling well inside me…and I believe it belonged to the stallion.

Upon seeing the young foal, the stallion immediately came close and pulled him upward, embracing his son as the two fell playfully onto a bouncy platform.

As he stared into his foal’s eyes I saw clearly into the soul of the child that beamed with joy and happiness. It was a look like no other, one that could have been cherished forever.

It was a stare that needed no peace to love everything. Love already lived inside of it, and I felt its love sear into my soul. I felt a latch open inside of me, one that came heavily and distorted my senses in an odd manner.

Words became distorted, but images also became clearer. It was as if the orb tuned out all words and focused only on the memory, as if it knew words were meaningless, and what mattered the most was the child.

Or maybe it was my mind that had done so, altering the style of this memory as if it was my own.

Whether it was one or the other, I knew without a doubt that this foal had created something inside of me, a fact that I feared for I could not find the answer as to why or how.

Images of the foal shot through my mind, and through each moment I lived through a piece of the past. And through each piece, I came to realize the lie I was living.

The world I lived in was no garden. It was a graveyard, a land void of love and life. Orion and I were the only ones out here, and we were all alone.

“We’re alone…” I heard myself mutter.

I then knew I was awake.

(^-*><*-^)

The world began to stir around me once more, draining colors out of my eyes as I was left with drained textures and sickly pigments. I was back in the real world.

“- you okay?” Orion asked me as I came out of the orb that had managed to roll out of my hooves during my flashback.

I explained to Orion what I saw, what I heard…and what I felt. I told him of what was going on, of what I felt of the matter.

Orion looked at me in wonder, and smiled at the very world I began to explain in detail. I told him of the bloom of colors, the entourages of ponies, and the smile of the foal. All of what he heard he accommodated with an expression of graceful gratitude.

The more I began to explain in detail though, the more I felt my heart ache. My enthusiasm slowly withered away as I continued to explain myself, melting away the warm smile on Orion’s face in the process. I began to fall apart.

Orion tried to calm me down, but my sudden shift in mood rejected his attempts to do so.

“I want to feel what they felt!” I said, noticing that I now had tears running down the sides of my face. I tried to stop, only to notice that they were flowing more. Soon the tears broke into streams, and my heart removed the dam that suppressed the pain I felt inside.

“…I…want…to…go…home…” I found myself crying, shocking myself as I collapsed onto the ground. I clasped my hooves over my face to hide my shame, but nothing worked.

I cried to return to a home that wanted to kill me. But death was no different than it was from out here. To be out here with no chance of a future was the parallel of death itself. After explaining everything to Orion, I realized that this world was no garden. It was but a graveyard. A cold, quiet graveyard. Only Orion stood by me, and here I was making a fool of myself in front of him.

I felt something shatter against my side, and my glow began to fade once again, rendering me to be nothing more but a hollow shell.

The voice returned as well, laughing as it saw me submitted to my knees.

Death is but an end to all pain. Accept it. Do not fight it. You are alive, but for how long? How long must you endure this loneliness? But loneliness is serenity, is it not? Both are divine gifts which you wish to escape, but why? Do you long for comfort by other souls? Does it matter what their darkened souls bring to you, a kindred spirit? Come to me…let me ease your sorrows...”

The voice began to slowly fade as I felt a pair of hooves wrap around me and hold me close, a strong embrace that offered comfort and peace as aid for my battle.

“I’m sorry…I cannot say it enough…forgive me.”

Without hesitation I collapsed in his forelegs, crying into the stallion’s shoulders as he held me close. He gave me closure ad offered me comfort. I did not want to do this in front of him, but the harder I tried, the worse it became.

So I stopped fighting it. I cried, sobbing loudly in a silent world as dusk turned to dawn and we remained entwined with one another, my tears cleaning Orion’s mangled coat.

{***}

The week turned into a month. Around then, counting became a loose configuration in my head, so it may have been a little more, or it may have been a little less than a month.

By then, we had begun to walk with purpose. We tried to walk with direction, seeking a route in an unstructured world.

After that night, I had set out on a quest to find a piece of the past, similar to what I saw in the orb. Of course, most things were gone without a doubt, but there had to be one thing that was not: ponies. For days, we had set out in finding any signs of life, hopeful to assure ourselves that maybe, we were not the only ponies out here in the waste. And our quest has taken us not very far from where we started.

“What is it that you’re looking for exactly?” Orion asked me as I rummaged through an old train stop, which had been sanded down and redirected by a destructive, unknown force.

“There has to be somewhere in this world where ponies live. There just has to be.” I crossed, looking at the map to gain an exact feel of where we were. Most words were faded however, and the only one visible was a single sentence that boldly stated YOU ARE HERE.

“Searching for the Crystal Empire?” Orion snickered. He then laughed half-heartedly as he stomped one hoof down on the floor.

“Imagine if there was one though?” he thought, putting a hoof on his muzzle. I rolled my eyes and gave a sly smile.

“I very much doubt that would ever be” I shot, but Orion lifted an eyebrow.

“You never know…” Orion cooed as he ventured on without me. I trotted after him, glancing upward at the light brown skies from above. “There could very be a crystal empire right above us…”

The colors of the sky were changing as we moved along, but never did they foretell goodness. Such we had to find on our own, between the both of us.

“Orion, I think that radiation is getting to you” I noted as I lifted an eyebrow upward, “There is no way there could be something that great up there.”

“What makes you say that?” he retorted.

“Well, unless you can’t see that brown sky above us –which you’re clearly looking at - I’m pretty sure there can never be something that great out here.”

“Nonsense Starlight, not even you believe that!” Orion shot, causing me to stop in my tracks.

“Oh really? Now how would you know that?”

“Because even you are trying to find something as close to that here in this wasteland.”

My eyes went blank and I felt my cheeks flush red with embarrassment. Orion smiled as he glanced at the sight of his victory.

“Err, well-”

“It’s all right Starlight,” Orion laughed, “But as sorry as I am to say it, even you have faith in a dream, just like I do. And I dream of a kingdom in the sky…”

He then gave a playful wink and turned his head to look straight ahead. I longed to say something in my defense, to disprove Orion’s statement. But I had nothing. Thinking was wasting time though, so I followed suit after him, my face expressing the confusion that waged within my mind.

As we walked further we soon stumbled upon another town, and quickly without question, began our search for life.

“We should check inside these houses.” I advised to Orion, who glanced upward at a two story house that fell and merged with the third story house to the left of it.

“You mean house.” Pyro said, correcting me with what he saw before him.

Still, he went in and began his search. I ventured along the right side of the street, looking at small tattered homes and makeshift huts that remained unoccupied. It had seemed that this region was once populated, but now everybody seemed to have vanished without a trace. It was all very clear that people survived after the war, but it offered no reasonable explanation as to why they were nowhere to be found.

I walked a little farther along the right side of the street until I stumbled upon a curb. As I was about to make a turn, I thought I caught a glimpse of a shadow moving from afar. It moved slowly, and made little attempt to shield itself as I looked at it from the curb.

It was then that I caught a glimpse of a grey coated pony from afar, who walked across my line of sight without little thought. He walked as if he was oblivious to the destruction around him, which led me to believe that he was a native of this foreign land.

I felt something well inside of. I felt light headed. And I held a small smile.

I had finally found somepony.

I could not believe my discovery. I had found another pony! I had discovered proof that there was life out here, that there was more to this world than infinite silence.

My happiness got the better of me. I should have waited for Orion. I should have told him.

But instead I found myself running in the direction of the pony, who had already traveled across the small street and into the left side. He did not take notice of me, and that was what I wanted.

I was excited, like a young filly, eager to meet this new pony and discover who they were and how they lived out here and if they knew anypony else…

The questions continued to pile up as I ran as quickly as I could. At last I had found what I sought, and I was bent on fulfilling my goal.

“Wait!” I found myself calling as I had moved near the left side of the curb, reeling my weight as I skidded over rubble and debris.

And at that moment, the voice whispered harshly, “Be careful what you wish for, kindred.”

Without a second to reflect on its warning, I remained petrified as I stared into a large, decimated building that had fallen within itself, leaving the inside exposed to view. But what I saw hanging from broken window panes and fractured floorboards made me wince as needles trickled over my face.

Ponies dangled motionlessly from the small building, in no particular manner. They hanged from their necks, their legs, their spines…

I could no longer take it. My eyes began to frantically move about as fear seized my mind. The sound of pebbles shifting aside caused me to bolt in the source’s direction, leaving me to stare onward at a dark grey stallion who smiled wickedly at me. His dark green eyes looked straight through me, sending adrenaline through my veins which were in danger of bursting.

It was then that a single thought passed through my mind: Orion.

I struggled to turn away from the horrid sight and tired run back towards Orion, but my mind stood against me though, as if these thoughts were not my own…

“Blander, disregard, negligence... Is that how a queen treats her subjects of the wastes? I bring you guests, and you reject their calling? I am appalled. You sought the eyes of Haddock, and hear you run from his vision….”

I shook my head violently, and actually responded to the voice out of fear.

“No…stop…”

I had taken a few steps back, trying to rid of the horrible dread within me, but I had felt something press against my backside. As quickly as I held felt it, a large mass of weight fell upon my back, sending me down to the ground as I cried out in agony. I felt every nerve in my body temporarily shut down as something heavy pressed against my limp frame, pressing harder with every passing second. I tried to scream, but my mouth was incapable of moving as I had only been able to give muffled sobs.

My eyes pleaded for my mouth could do nothing. They moved frenetically, sending the world into a contorted blur of dust and ash. I felt the sound of hooves approaching rebound into my ears, which caused me to muffle even louder. I was trying to call for help. I tried to move my body. I tried to run for Orion.

But my body only knew pain, and pain became a companion of my mind.

Then, without warning, I felt my body violently whir to one side as everything went black.



New Perk:Little Ms. Rover - Salvaging the wastes has made you an excellent scavenger! Every time you loot or take items, you are 80% more likely to discover food and water.