• Published 14th Jan 2014
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Rewrite: Your Little Adventure - My Only Weakness



[Second Person] This is a rewrite of my original story Your Little adventure

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The Adventure Starts Now

Your Little Adventure

By My Only Weakness

"There you go ma'am, all ready for your husband's birthday tomorrow" you say handing a bunch of roses over to a middle aged mare

"Thank you very much" She said gracefully, than hoofing over some bits to pay for the roses. She then turns around and walks towards the door.

You take the bits from her and open up the cash register and place the bits inside and then close the register.

You currently stand behind the counter of a flower shop, reading the newspaper. This flower shop is in fact a family business on your mother's side of the family. No, you don't work there, but you usually help out there every now and again.

"StarGazer?" a female voice calls out from the back of the shop

"Yeah Mum?" you call back

A unicorn mare walks out from the door. This is your mum Rose Petal. The colour of your mum’s coat was a pinkish red and her mane was a light brown with yellow highlights. Her cutie mark was a rose representing her talent for flowering.

"You've been working hard, how about you head home" she says with a sweet smile

"Are you sure?" you question

She replies with a simple nod "Business is running slow today anyway, and you must be bored out of your mind" she finishes with a little giggle "Now head off home"

You give a smile and nod then jump over the counter and head towards the door

"How many times have I told you not the jump over the counter?" Your mum says unimpressed

You put your hoof up to your chin and start to think, "About twelve times" you say with a smirk

"Yes, now go" she says before turning around to walk to the back of the shop.

You open the door which makes a ring, you step outside and take a nice breath of fresh air. You live in the city of Fillydelphia and you were happy by the fact that you grew up here. Before spreading your wings you take another breath of air. You start to flap your wings and soar off into the sky and headed off home. You flapped your wings as fast as they could go. Feeling the wind on your face brought you happiness.

Your grandfather was the one who taught you how to fly. Your grandfather was the former coach of the wonder bolts, and he even taught you some special movements for your wing that would help you fly faster.

You start to feel a little pain on your wings, so you land on a nearby cloud and start to check your wings to make sure that nothing was out of place

"StarGazer" another voice calls out your name

You look over to the sauce of the voice to see to see one of weather ponies flying over to you. This stallion goes by many names like; Frost Bite, Weather Pony, but commonly used by you, Dad. Your Dad was a battleship gray Pegasus, his mane and tail was white with an ice blue streak going through it. His cutie mark was a gray cloud with snowflakes coming from it.

"Yeah?" you ask

"I've told you time and time again that you shouldn’t be standing on the clouds over the city, you could get into some serious trouble" He explains landing on the cloud as well

"Oh come on, it's not like anyone can see me" you say

"True, but if the head of the weather see's you, who knows what could happen" he say confusing you

"But... you're the head of weather" you say with a confused look on your face

"I know" he says with a chuckle "Next time I won't be so soft on you" he continues flapping with wings, now hovering in the air "Now off the cloud"

You roll your eyes and start to hover in the air as the cloud continues to move on its path.

"See you later" you say to your dad then flying back towards the house

After about a minute of flying, you land at the front door of your home. You still lived with your Mum and Dad. Hey, you're still 23 so it's not a big deal. You quickly trot upstairs and head towards the bathroom to take a shower.

After a couple of minutes of a nice hot shower, you turn the water off, and you grab a few towels and look at yourself in the mirror. You've been told multiple times by your relatives that you're such a handsome colt. Your coat was ash gray, a couple shades lighter than your dad's coat. Your mane and tail was brown colour but darker than your mum's mane, on the ends on your mane had a light blue colour.

You quickly dry yourself off and head into the kitchen to grab something to eat and to fill up your bottle with water. After a quick snack, you head back out the house. You take the back door, since you lived behind a huge field where a bunch of kids hung out and play. There was a racing track as well so that you can practice.

You just LOVED to race, it's been a hobby of yours for years. You even got your cutie mark from racing then you were six, not to mention that you broke the Fillydelphia Young Pegasus Racers record, or simply know as the F.Y.P.R. Eighteen years later, it still hasn’t been broken, so it's one of your proudest accomplishments.

You place yourself at the starting line of the race track and get into the proper racing stance. You count up to three before firing off down the track, using your wings to propel you at top speed trying to beat your own record.

After doing three laps of the track, you stand at the finish line a take a breather so that you can get ready for another five laps. After a quick drink of water, you're back to flying around the track before...

"Hey, Star" A voice hollows out from behind you

You turn towards the voice to see one of your friend, Card Shuffle, but you just call him Shuff... which he hates. Shuffle was a big softy, as he calls it being a gentle colt, though he's not much of a softy when either you or any other of his friends are threatened. He was a slightly dark cyan Pegasus, though he rarely flies, but the only time he uses his wings is to lay down on a cloud to get away from it all.

"Hey Shuff" You say greeting him

"I've told you multiple time to stop calling me that" He says unimpressed

"If I stop, then where's the fun in it for me" you say with a smirk, he still looks at you still unimpressed "So have you been?"
"I've been good, quieter of the way to my budget of owning my own card shop" Shuffle say with pride

Card Shuffle's life goal is to own his own card shop, his cutie mark was a royal flush of cards

"So what have you been up to?"

"Just practicing" You say with a smirk

"I can see that" He responds with a chuckle "Do you ever get bored of just practicing all day?"

"No, why?" you question

"Because you've been doing the same routine for year now"

"I have?"

"Yeah, you have" Shuffle begins "All you've done is, come home from whatever you've been doing then come out here a practice"

"And... that's a bad thing how?" You ask

He doesn't say anything, he just face hoofs. You're not sure if you should take that as an insult.

"Okay, I know you have a reputation around here as Fillydelphia’s fastest flyer" He says, in which you nod proudly "But there is more you should do then practise"

"Hey, I do more than just practice, I hang out with you, Altair, Free Runner, Dark Flair and all the others whenever you guys have time off work" You say defectively "We even hit up the bar a couple days ago"

"Yeah, but the day after that you returned to your practicing routine. Even when it's raining, you still practice" he says with annoyance in his voice

Why would he be annoyed with you just because you're practicing what you love doing

"And the fact that you still live with your parents"

"... So do you" you say

"Yeah, but I don't feed off their money"

"I still don't understand what you're trying to get at?" you question

Shuffle face hooves again

"The point I'm trying to make is that you should try something more than just practicing, try something different" he explains

You were about to object again but then it really hit your mind, you have been doing the same thing over and over again

"Oh crap, I gotta go" Shuffle says snapping you out of your thoughts "I'll see ya some other time"

"Oh, alright, have a good one" you say before he trots off

You got back into your starting position, about to take off for another five laps, but the thought of doing something other than practice keeps swimming in your mind. You push the thought to the side and spend your wings, as you were about to speed off something hits your hind leg. You look over your shoulder to see at a pamphlet suck to your leg. You grab the pamphlet and start to read it.

This pamphlet is about a small town by the name of Ponyville... real original. It says that it's a nice little and quiet town with tons of friendly ponies, I bet not all of them are. The town has also built some new homes that are available.

You were about to let go of the pamphlet and let the wind take it, but then it hit your mind. “Is this the change that Shuff was talking about?” you think to yourself “Maybe it is time that I try something different”.

"Excuse me, pal?" a voice says

You look over to see a two little colts and a stallion

"Can I use the track please?" says the stallion

"Oh, of course" you say grabbing your water bottle then flying back to you house.

You walk back into your house from the backdoor to see your parents have finished work. Your mum is reading a book and your Dad is working on some papers. You dad looks up at you and smiles

"Hey Star, you been practicing again?" he asks

"Yep" you say smiling back at him, but you try to hide the pamphlet "I'm just going to have a little rest " you continue trotting back to the stairs

"I'll wake you up when dinners ready" your mum says, not even taking her eyes off the book

You nod and then walk back upstairs to your room. You open the door to your room and walk towards your bed. You sit down on your bed and read the pamphlet again. You keep thinking of the pros and cons of this whole idea of moving there.

After thinking it over and over again, you decided that you're going to move to this Ponyville. But first, you're going to a quick nap.


You start to feel a hoof on your shoulder, shaking you. You open your eyes slowly and look at the culprit that has awoken you from your slumber. The one who woke you up was your Mum.

"Come on, wakey wakey, dinners nearly ready and your brother and sister will be here soon" She say before walking out of your room

You roll of your bed and yawn. You were about to walk out your room but then you start to think
How am I going to tell them that I'm going to move to this Ponyville, Mum and Sis will be heartbroken to know that I'm moving out the city.

You walk down the stairs and head to the front room, but before you could set a hoof into the room you hear a knocking on the door. You walk over to the door and open it, you get pulled into the headlock and hoof is rubbing into your mane.

"Hey little bro" your brother say getting you

"Hey Shade" you squeak out because your brother was holding your neck too tight

Your brother, Rayless Shade, was eight years older than you. He was named after your great grandfather who passed away a week before he was born, and plus he was a spitting image of him. He was a darker gray than you and your dad, and his mane was a darker shade of brown than yours and he was also a unicorn. His cutie mark was a badge in front of a sun, He is now part of the Fillydelphia police force. When you were growing up, Shade would pick on you (like older brothers do), mainly because you could fly and he couldn't, but he had pretty good magic skills.

Shade finally lets go of you and back off and sit on the stairs to catch your breath.

"Oh come on little bro" He say walking into the house with a smile on his face "I didn't have you in my grasp that tight"

"Yeah, you kind of did" you gasp out

"Huh, I guess I still don't know my own stretch" he says flexing his muscles

“Where’s Peach Top?” You ask

Peach Top was his wife. They’ve only been married for about 2 years

“She’s doing another night shift” Shade said disappointedly “but you know she’s saving lives”

Peach Top works as a doctor. She is a very good doctor as a matter of fact. She even managed to heal your broken wing faster then anyone else.

"So where's Mum and Dad?"

"They're in the kitchen" you say getting of the stairs

Shade walks into the front room leaving the front door open. You sigh and go to close it, when you were about to grab the handle...

"StarGazer!" a female voice calls out

You look over to see a pinkish red and yellow maned mare trotting over to you. This was your older sister Rose Beat. She's older than you by five years. Her cutie mark was a rose with music notes around it. Your sister pretty much love's you to death, if you were being picked on by other ponies she would be there for you, if you were upset she would cheer you up.

"Hey Rose Beat" you greet her before she tackles you into a hug

"How's my little brother?" she says still hugging you

"I'm going fine, what about my big sis?"

"Fantastic" she says stopping her hug but still holding on to you "Well, my week wasn't fantastic, but seeing my little brother again makes it so much better" she continues then hugging you again

"Well I'm happy that I'm the highlight of your week" you say, returning the hug

You and Rose Beat finally stop hugging

"So I take that Shade is here" Rose Beat says with a smirk

"How did you know?"

"Well your mane is a mess, so I take it that he noogied you" she says still smirking

"Like always" you say rolling your eye which causes her to giggle "Are you just going to stand out there or are you going to come in?"

"Oh, yes!" she says, you step out of the way and let her walk into the house and goes to the front room

Oh great, knowing that I'm the highlight of Rose Beat's week is making me think twice about moving to this Ponyville.

You shut the door and walk into the front room to see your brother and sister have already taken a seat on the couch.

"What were you doing Star?" Shade asks

"Huh?"

"You took a while to shut the door" he continues

"Well... I... uh"

"Is something wrong Star?" asks Rose Beat

"No, No, nothing wrong"

"Star.." Rose Beat says raising an eyebrow in worried, you were never any good at lying to your sister it's like she can see right through you "You're my little brother, I can tell when something is bothering you"

"Nothing is wrong Rose Beat, I promise"

Rose Beat still looks at you with a worried look. You were almost about to crack and give in and tell her that you were going to move, but luckily Shade stops you by changing the subject

"So how have you guys been?" he asks

"Good" says your sister "I'm currently working on some more songs"

"Oh awesome" you say sitting down next to her "Can't wait to hear them"

"Well maybe you could help me sing some of the songs" she suggest "Ponies would love to hear you amazing voice"

"Rose Beat, you know I can't sing" you say

"Yes you can, we used to sing together all the time when we were younger whenever you were upset" Rose Beat says cuddling you

"Hey Star" you brother says catching your attention

At the corner of your eye you can see your brother making a face that always makes you laugh, you're trying to hold your laughter, but you still had a silly smile on your face. Rose Beat looks at you with a confusion.

"What so funny?" she asks

"Nothing" you says still trying to hold in your laugh

You're in the way of your sister’s sight, so she can't see Rayless Shade, but she has a hunch on what got you making a silly smile

"Is Shade making that face again?" she ask

"No" you say still trying hard not to laugh, but you know that Shade is still making the face

You can't hold back anymore so you let out your laugh. You can hear your brother laughing was well because whenever you laugh at that face, it makes him laughs as well. You can also hear your sister giggle as well.

"What's going on?" you mother ask from inside the kitchen

"Shade was making that face again" your sister answers


After a couple of minutes of talking to your siblings, dinner was finally ready so you all gathered round the table. Dinner was placed in front of you and everyone dug in. During eating everypony was talking about their week, but you couldn't help but think how you were going to tell everyone that you were moving.

Everypony had finished eating, so you thought this would be the best time to tell everypony. You sit up from your chair and they all look at you

"I have something to say" you begin make the first thing I say sound stupid... check

Everypony eyes are locked on you and they give you a looks that say “carry on”

Pause for effect... check

"Well?" your dads says impatiently

"I'm moving" you say bluntly

"You are?" your mum ask, which you respond with a nod "Where in the city?"

"That's the thing, I'm moving out of the city" you say scratching in back of your neck

"Y-You are?" Rose Beat says in an upsetting tone

"Were to?" your brother asks

"To this town called Ponyville"

"When are you going?" asked your mother in shock

"In about a week"

Silence falls across the table and sad looks are on everyone's faces. Your dad gets up from the table and trots over to you and places a hoof on your shoulder.

"Well son" he begins "Whatever you decide to do you have my support"

"Thanks Dad"


You sit a table in a bar with your friends; Altair, Free Runner, Dark Flair and Card Shuffle.

"Well boys, tomorrow I leave for Ponyville" you announce hold you drink in the air

"Where gonna miss ya pal" A grey earth pony with a blue mane who goes by the name of Free Runner speaks up clinking his glass with yours

"Cheers"

"It's going to be so weird without my best friend around" Altair says wrapping his arm around you

"I'm gonna miss you bud" you reply

"Yo Star" a fiery maned and tailed pegasus says grabbing your attention

"Yeah Darkflare?"

"We all chipped in to get you a little farewell present" he continues placing a small present on the table and sliding it towards you

You pick you the present and start to unwrap it. Underneath the wrapping paper was a small cardboard box. You lift up the top of the box to see a photo frame. In the photo was you and all of your friend sitting with you. You could help crack a smile.

"Thanks guys" you say grabbing you glass and taking a drink

"Star, do you remember Winter Heart?" asked Altair

You stop to think if you ever knew a “Winter Heart”. You know that the name rings a bell but you just can't place you hoof on it. But suddenly it comes to you.

"Oh yeah I remember her, that mare form school, white coat, white mane with purple highlights"

"Yeah" Free Runner confirms "But did you know that she had the biggest crush on you?"

"She did?" you say tilting you head slightly

"Yeah, it was so obvious" says Card Shuffle "How did you not realize"

You shrug in response at his question

"She would look at you all the time in class, she had your name written all over her notebook" says Altair after taking a sip of his drink

"How do you know that?" you asks looking at Altair with a funny look

"Because she came up to me one day in class and told me how much of a crush she had on you"

"So she had a crush on he throughout those five years?" you ask, in which they all nod "Why didn't she just ask me to go out with her, I would of said yes"

"She was a nervous wreck every time she was around you" explains Dark Flare

"Anyway, enough about Winter Heart" Free Runner says standing up from his seat "YO BARTENDER!" he shouts to the stallion behind the counter "ONE MORE ROUND!"


Today was the day. The day were you would leave your home to start a new life. You packed your final bag full of bits and placed it around you. You head out of your room and headed downstairs where you see your family waiting for you. You leave the final step of the staircase and look at your family.

"You ready to go?" asks you dad standing near the door.

"Yeah" you reply softly and head towards the door

You and your family walk out the front door and walk throughout the city one last time. No one was talking throughout the whole time you were walking. You reach the train station where you ask for a one way ticket for Ponyville. Your family stand at the platform and wait for the train.

"Well son, looks like you’re becoming your own stallion" Your Dad says looking at you with a smile

"I know, it's weird" you say, which gets a chuckle from him

He pulls you into a hug. Even though you couldn't see his face you can tell he's trying to hold back his tears. After a hug you let go of each other were your mum hugs you and releases the water works.

"I can't believe that my baby is leaving" she says holding you tighter

"Mum, I'm not leaving Equestria"

"I know" she says whipping the tears from her face "But you're leaving your home of Fillydelphia, the place where you were born, where you took your first steps, where you said your first words, where you first learnt how to fly" she continues with tears forming in her eyes again

You don't have anything to respond to that, so you just hold your mum again in a tight hug. She lets go of you and grabs you face like she did when you were younger and says;

"Just promise you'll write to us"

"Of course I will"

When she lets go of you, you dad wraps his wing around her. Your brother is the next to come up to you. You looking at him and smirk a little

"Are you going to cry?" you say mockingly

"No!" he says defensively "I'm a police officer, I don't cry"

You continue smiling at him until he pulls you into a hug. You and your brother don't really hug that much, you only hug on rarer occasions, but his was completely different. He wasn't going to have a little brother to pick on anymore.

After that short little hug you sister intently hugs you and starts to cry.

"Come on Beat don't be like this" you say stroking her blond mane

"I don't want my little brother to go"

Again, you were lost for words so you just stood there holding your sister and stroking her mane waiting for the train to arrive.

Soon the train horn blows in the distance and you train comes over the hill. You know you have to let go of your sister but you don't want to. As the train stops at the station the ticket pony calls out "NEXT STOP PONYVILLE!".

"Well, looks like this is it" you say to your family while still holding Rose Beat

They don't say anything. They walk over to you and join you and Beat in a group hug. They all let go of you and trot over to the train.

"Ticket please"

You hand the ticket to the pony. You take the nearest seat to the window where you see that your mum and sister are crying again while your dad and brother are trying to hold back their tears.

As the train starts to move, your family starts to wave as the train slowly pulls away from the station. Tears start to form in your eyes as Fillydelphia get further and further away from you.

As Fillydelphia no longer become visible ,you realize that this is a start of a new adventure.

Your little adventure.

Author's Note:

The first chapter of this WOO!!!

Cheers to everyone who allowed me to use there O.C's in this story, you know who you are.