The kind of date of which I've dreamed since I was small!
“If you want to see your precious princess,” the Changeling Queen cackled over the glowing green communication orb, “then you will come alone, Sparkle. And don’t be late!”
Chrysalis’ horn ceased its sickly glow, and the image of the young alicorn princess disappeared. One of Chrysalis’ drones gently lifted the crystal ball and placed it back upon its obsidian pedestal.
“My Queen, do you require anything else before you retire?” the servile drone asked.
“No, drone. Your Queen requires no more of you.” Chrysalis turned back to her captive. “Leave me be with our guest.”
“What ever you have planned, Chrysalis,” the regal white alicorn protested as she tried to free herself, “Twilight Sparkle will stop you.”
She was hung upside down; a sickly green ichor, having hardened against her hooves, suspended Celestia from the ceiling. The same material covered her long horn, suppressing her magic, and her wings were bound tight against her body. She was the very definition of a damsel in distress: a mare with no means to defend herself or escape.
The changeling queen grasped Celestia’s muzzle. “Oh, Celestia, it should be obvious by now,” she cackled. “I… have… won!” Chrysalis punctuated each word with a light tap on the impotent alicorn’s nose.
Chrysalis turned her back on the glaring solar Princess. “She might have stopped me from taking her country.”
Chrysalis’ gossamer wings fluttered, lifting her into the air. “She might have stopped me from taking her power.”
“But nothing…” Chrysalis cackled maniacally as she alighted her bed. “No, nothing will stop me from taking her heart!”
“What?”
“She will be mine, all mine!” Chrysalis burst into maniacal laughter.
Celestia hung, dumbstruck, as the changeling queen levitated the communication crystal towards her chest, giggling. Touched once again by the changeling queen’s magic, Twilight Sparkle re-appeared in the small crystal.
“But she said alone,” Twilight argued. “And she has Princess Celestia!”
Chrysalis scowled as she heard the murmuring of Twilight’s meddling friends. Why wouldn’t they just take the hint and buck off?
“No!” Twilight argued with the orange one, Applesnack, if Chrysalis recalled correctly. “I can not risk Princess Celestia’s safety. Luna will take care of the country whilst I am gone, but I promise you: I will bring the Princess back, safe and sound.”
Chrysalis swooned, listening to the commanding voice of Princess Twilight Sparkle. So sexy… so sure of herself!
“Oh, I do hope she gets here soon!” Chrysalis levitated the crystal ball back to its podium, replacing it with a small hand mirror. “What should I wear? Do you think the crown is too much?
“I should take her to that little place on Aculeate Lane… Drone four-thousand-two-hundred-and-twenty-one says they serve the most delicious daffodils in a love bisque. Maybe if everything goes well, we’ll come back to the palace and… oh wait— does the bisque have garlic in it?”
Her thoughts finally returning to her, Celestia took stock of the giggling, heavily-blushing insectoid on its bed, running a small hoof-brush through its hole-ridden mane.
I’ve been caught by an idiot!
“You’re kidding me, right?” Celestia groaned. “You’ve got to be bucking kidding me!”
“You can’t stop us from loving one another!” Chrysalis shouted back at the alicorn. “We were meant to be!”
“And just what makes you think that?” Celestia asked, completely deadpan— a feat made all the more amazing by the fact she looked somewhat absurd suspended from the ceiling of the Changeling Queen’s bedroom.
“Well, she is smart, and determined. She’s also very pretty, if you are into hairy quadrupeds— which I guess I am…” Chrysalis beamed as she listed off Twilight’s qualities to Celestia. “And then there is that whole ‘not going to die on me in fifty years or so’ thing, too. I’ll tell you what, that is a big turn on!
“A-and she’s powerful.” Chrysalis shuddered, her blush furiously intensifying. “So very powerful! Last time she blasted me…” Chrysalis trailed off, fidgeting with her holed hooves. “I wanted her to stay with me, and she was even going to, but she ended up choosing her stupid friends.
“But this time, it is fool-proof; she’s coming alone! Her friends won’t mare-block me this time!”
“So you’re saying…” Celestia snarled as light flared from her horn. “That all of this…” She waved a free hoof around the room, startling Chrysalis. “That I gave up a full day’s work in hopes I could teach Twilight something about being a princess…”
As Celestia radiated with power and heat, Chrysalis scampered away from the impossibly-free alicorn in fear.
“That I allowed you to capture me,” Celestia boomed in the Royal Canterlot Voice. “All so you could get laid?
“What is wrong with you‽”
“H-how? I beat you…” Chrysalis tried to convince… probably herself.
“Oh come on, Chrysalis. Think!” Celestia scoffed. “I raise the sun every day. If I wanted to, I could have called down a solar flare on your entire kingdom and come out singing.”
Celestia sighed. “I had to leave my work to Luna today. Luna! Do you know how many problems she created last time I left her in charge? Our guests were waiting for her to return to a chess match for three days!” She looked down at the sobbing Changeling Queen and sighed.
“I am too old for this shi—”
Ж
“Spiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike!” Twilight panicked. “What am I supposed to bring on a clandestine mission to extract a princess from enemy territory?” The alicorn levitated Pinkie’s night-vision goggles and a shovel. “These were all I could find. I'm thinking: goggles, yes; shovels, I don't know how or why I'd use them.”
The little dragon stopped to think. “Maybe Rarity could make you a turtleneck; Pinkie says you can’t go on a spy mission without a turt—”
A knock at the door interrupted their conversation.
“Spike!” Twilight moaned. “I thought you put the ‘Closed for National Emergency’ sign up. Why is somepony knocking at our door?”
The dragon grumbled as he waddled down the stairs, muttering curses under his breath as he walked.
“Ummm, Twilight?” the little dragon called out. “I think you need to come downstairs.”
Twilight stomped out of the room, then stumbled down the stairs, landing in a tangle of ropes, pulleys and night-vision goggles.
“Princess‽” Twilight screeched as she stumbled to her hooves. “How? What? When?”
“Twilight, I have somepony here that would like to say something to you.” Before the smaller alicorn could say another word, Celestia stepped to the side, revealing the last pony Twilight ever expected to see in her library.
“Ummm, I just wanted to say I am sorry for stealing your princess,” Chrysalis mumbled.
“Aaaand?” Celestia prodded.
“And I’m sorry for kidnapping your friends’ sisters. Oh, and your sister-in-law. And your brother…”
“Ummm.” Twilight looked to her mentor, who nodded. “Apology accepted?”
“There. That wasn’t so hard, was it?” Celestia asked. The changeling shook her head. “Now, there was one more thing you wanted to ask, wasn’t there?”
Twilight watched in confusion as the Changeling Queen mumbled and fidgeted with her hooves. She looked imploringly to her mentor for an explanation, but none came.
“I was… ummm… that is, Celestia explained to me…” Chrysalis stumbled over her words. It was now or never, so she blurted out: “I REALLY LIKE YOU WOULD YOU GO OUT WITH ME?”
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And thus begins the awkward romance. You know you're going to have to continue this.
Must have more!!!!!!!!!
This is amazing
3785512
I dunno if there really is more in this, I don't actually foresee any outcome where Chryssy and Twi would go out.
I will put it down as a *maybe*, but I have other fics to finish first.
That was fun.
Yes, it would be great if there could be a continuation.
Wait.....
I dig it!
Lolwut, this was Chrysalis' plan the whole time?!
Is this only since the failed Canterlot invasion, or what?
Also, are you using genuine interrobangs there? Because whatever symbol you have after Celestia and Twilight's exclamations isn't displaying properly on my phone.
3785905
Canterlot Wedding and the IDW comics. Didn't overly worry where it fits into canon.
And yeah, genuine interrobang, it doesn't show on my tablet either.
Twilight.exe has stopped responding. Processing error
3785564
A chapter where Twi humors Chrysalis with a super awkward date, with running commentary from a peanut galley of princesses and her friends could be awesome!
And double kudos points for including comic events in this.
You can't stop this now XD its just much too good!
And remind me of
derpicdn.net/img/view/2014/1/11/520933__safe_twilight+sparkle_animated_queen+chrysalis_changeling_the+simpsons_artist-colon-mrponiator_stupid+sexy+twilight_stupid+sexy+flanders.gif
3785564 There's probably gonna be people who'll make their own sequels to this, and they'll likely cover every possible response...
See Chrysalis, that wasn't so hard, now was it? I forsee the future romance being both awkard and adorable.
DAT ENDING.
This was enjoyable.
Approved for Twilight's Library.
~Skeeter The Lurker
3785564 please please please continue this delicious foe-yay
3786166
hmm
at least she is obviously crazy which is better as the other immortals who just snap or worse are subtle crazy ^^
That was fantastic, and I laughed a lot.
So Cryssy likes being dominated by little purple alicorns?
And not everything has to be a lesson, Celestia.
I can honestly say i have no idea what i just reed
But i think i like it, a bit confused by the sex tag but ok. 
(It has no meaning but i like giving out ratings 
)
I can't not give it a 9 or 8 so i'll give you a 5/10
Absurd enough to get an upvote. Nicely done!
Also, 3786398 :
There's your 'sex' tag. Ahhhhh..... goggles!
Bravo! Simply stupendous especially that ending!
Congrats on getting featured!
And gotta say, I liked this. Short and silly, enough to get a smile and a giggle out of me. 
Kinda sad that this is a one-shot, but hey, I can live with that. Thumb up from me!
I want more of awkward Chrysalis D:
Imwaiting for the follow up on this... twtwilights reaction. And the events thereafter.
This is so ridiculous is has to be legit.
It's always so hard to ask that girl of your dreams out for the first time.
3786398
I was erring on the side of caution, I usually do.
3786636
Too few stories include events from the comics, so thanks, I aim to please.They did nothing?
3785933
They did nothing?Too few stories include events from the comics, so thanks, I aim to please.
3787025
I have ideas for a follow up, just playing around with them now, see if they will be as funny as this one. And glad you liked it, LD!
Edit: HAHA I AM AN IDIOT!
3786091
I totally did not see that the first time through. Thanks Skeets!
bwahahahaha, freaking awesome
3788237
You're quite welcome!
~Skeeter The Lurker
awwwww its like a mother scoldering her child, so cute!
What no reaction to her question? That's something you gotta avoid my friend, ending it too early without an actual ending.
Upsets quite a few people plus it's mostly irritating.
Those fangs are kind of a turn off. They look... dangerous and, scary.
3788581
Hah, someone has downvoted your comment. Either it is someone who loves Chryssy, or someone who has a teeth-fetish.
It could go either way on this site.
I
wantneed more3788608
Honestly I think it's the second one. Wouldn't surprise me at all.
Wow, someone actually used a genuine interrobang that wasn't myself? Shit man, you're the first i've seen.
Dat cliffhanger. Normally i hate them, but this one was just so hilariously placed i can't ignore it..
And shame on you Celestia. You could still have turned this into a Princess lesson; about how to deal with the inevitable obsessed stalkers she'll attract.
The little dragon stopped to think. “Maybe Rarity could make you a turtleneck, Pinkie says you can’t go on a spy-mission without a turt—”
So when did Pinkie Pie start channeling Archer.
3789379
A... tac-turtle... what ever!
I think Pinkie has been channelling archer ever since the Crystal Empire
And I am so glad someone caught that.
Gk... rbl... bwahahaha!
My only complaint is that this story isn't structured well for a sequel. This makes me sad.
Insta-faved!
3788581
Some mares are into that kind of thing.
ok you have to continue this at least anouther chapteer where twilight agrees.. way to easily and throws Celestia for a loop.
3788059
Totally! And then after you ask them out, your mother corners you as you get ready, so you've got to answer all these questions before you leave, saying things like "yes, mother, she's a shape-shifting bug pony. No, I said 'she.' Yes, it's a mare. Yes, that means I'm a fillyfooler." and then things just get awkward.
This so needs a sequel/more chapters.
3788608
You act like the two are mutually exclusive.
lol... just...LOL!
Chrysalis-turned-embarrased-child-by-Celestia is great!
Thanks for the fun little blurb to read!