• Member Since 1st Dec, 2012
  • offline last seen July 5th

Goldenheart


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All of the pegasi are tasked of getting water from Manehattan's Horsepower Park in what is called, "Operation Rainrise". As Blossomforth and Daring Do help out with the mission, a promising young Wonderbolt Academy recruit-in-training named Lightning Dust, may immobilize the mission and cause problems for the Mane 6.

Chapters (4)
Comments ( 26 )

Very nice, I'll be sure to revise Blossomforth with all your might accordingly once you're done.

Like I stated, I can finished this by the end of the week since I'm recycling the material I already have, while adding new material. At the earliest, I can have this done by wednesday:rainbowdetermined2:

So Lightning Dust is in here, huh? We'll see how things turn out with her around.

Man, this lightning a Dust is even worse than the canon one.:rainbowderp:
This is all gonna end ugly, I just know it.

I see you took my speculation about Daring's nail in this universe into perspective.

Minor correction: "Infamous" means "having a bad reputation" or "notorious for doing harm". Probably not the word ya wanna use to describe Daring Do.

Lightning sure needs a good kick to the head.:ajbemused:
Nice work re-enacting the scenes from the original story.

Lightning Dust, you undoubtably the worst Pegasus pony ever.:ajbemused:

No, your story is not the worst, I think is the nice remake.:ajsmug: I would like to see the Ticket Master episode if you wrote one.:twilightsheepish:

Great work on this remake! I really enjoyed reading it!:pinkiehappy:

And I was also happy to see Lightning get a good kick in the head.:yay:

3861136
He means he considers the original his personal worst so far. But yeah, this is a great improvement.

Re-read this chapter a bit, I think you misplaced some words.

Other than mixing up Spitfire and Lighting Dust's name a few times, I'd say this was a much stronger canon remake. I'll start editing my episode to fit and let everypony know when it's done!

3859050 Wait, only Pegasus? Who beats her that they need to. E listed separately?

Raindrops and Lightning Dust, this should be good.

So what LD told Blossomforth was a facade and what was the real her was actually the opposite. AJ dissaproves. :ajbemused: Not that Lightning Dust cares I'll bet.

You could not have made Lightning Dust more unsympathic, malicious, stupid and one-dimensional.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/RonTheDeathEater
I don´t approve.

Spitfire then cheers in excitement with the rest of her recruits joining in. The whole room is full of applause for having a great Pegasus helping them. Blossomforth knows her friend will be there to help anypony, and so will she. She then looks to the cheering recruits and sees that Lightning Dust isn't cheering with everypony else. She's not sure why, but Blossomforth has a weird feeling coming from her. Either way, the now proclaimed "Operation Rainrise" has officially begun!

Yeah, this is totally not gonna end well with Lightning Dust here...:ajsleepy:.

"Me. Before I met Sandy," says Daring in a dark tone.

I think you should stop asking Daring about her personal life now Blossom...:twilightoops:.

Lightining Dust continues her 'intimidating' speech, "You think I will show mercy? Mercy is for the weak. You must do whatever it takes to be the best. Take whatever risk you can to overcome the challenges ahead."

Yeah, this is totally gonna end badly:rainbowderp:.

"Now, as much as I hate this. Daring has assigned me with four pony friends of hers to do some training over the next couple of days. So no matter what happens, be sure to give 200%. Are we clear?" explains Lightning Dust.

Rainbow would detest to that! She'd give it at least 220%:rainbowdetermined2:!

She then says under her breath, "Now that I've got her wrapped around my hoof, she won't go squealing to Spitfire. As long as I keep up this facade in front of her until the job is done, I'll be a Wonderbolt before I know it!

Oh crap...:facehoof:.

The various rocks and sticks hit the group with one shouting in anguish, "My leg! My leg....."

Spongebob reference:scootangel:!

"Uh, Trixie. Do you have a medical book about stick in butt?" questions Blossomforth.

Oh don't even wanna know...:pinkiesick:.

"I hope so. Blossom is the most loyal and dependable pony I know," says a gentle Daring.

And one of the most underrated...:ajsleepy:.

Based on the characters involved and the description, I think it's safe to say that this is based on Hurricane Fluttershy And considering the other character, it a mashup with Wonderbolts Academy. And this is before I even start reading the first chapter.


RE:Hurricane Blossomforth

At least give me the chance to start reading before my suspicions are confirmed. At least the new title demonstrates more subtlety.


Twilight could be studying at this moment.

I feel like that's just sense to assume.


Next year will be a rural town outside Canterlot.

I feel like that detail was unnecessary.

I'm not sure if I'm a fan of this portrayal of Lightning Dust. Not that I'm a fan of Lightning Dust in the first place. But in canon, she's primarily just reckless. And even though she doesn't care about the well being of others as long as she can prove herself, she doesn't specifically go out of her way to be cruel. That's just a side affect, not the cause. In this, she's clearly going out of her way to be cruel.

Then again, there are more differences between the Manehattenverse and the Maneverse than just where Twilight was sent and who got the Elements of Harmony.

"No she's right. I have high hopes for Lightning Dust, even if she's an arrogant jerk. Ponies like her don't come that often. So if the mistake of the injured ponies should come from anypony, I'll take full responsibility," says a dissapointed Spitfire.

Considering that the Wonderbolts are not just a group of stunt fliers, but a branch of military, let's look at the facts...
She's rebellious and unruly (disobedient).
She abandoned her team for her own self interests (desertion).
She knowingly caused harm to her team (treason).
She manipulates ponies (bribery/quid pro quo).
She also thinks that she can get away with anything because position is presumably in the bag no matter what she does (believes she's above the law).
I'm pretty sure that list would cause her to be court marshaled if she were in the military. So I'm pretty sure that, at this point, there's an entire city (one of the largest cities in Equestria no less) that would boycott the Wonderbolts, and possibly even ban them if either Spitfire or Canterlot were willing to let her in after this... did this story just predict the political conditions of the U.S. in 2020?


"Why, I don't know what you're talking about. I only lost control," says an innocent Lightning Dust.

Intentional or not, that would also be a strike against her getting into the Wonderbolts. Such a loss of control that could lead to such a catastrophic failure that could've resulted in harming hundreds of ponies? That certainly isn't gonna earn you points. And on purpose, it's even worse. But no matter what, "loss of control" like that demonstrates that proves that the pony who replaced her as team leader, Blossomforth, has more control than her. And thanks to Octavia's involvement, "loss of control" can't even be used as an excuse, because Octavia was specifically teaching control. Then there's Twilight, who would've taught how to keep control in conditions like that. Nerves can't be used as an excuse for loss of control, because Trixie taught them to keep calm under pressure. And low energy would've been dealt with thanks to Auntie Orange.

It seems to me that either it was intentional, which makes her unworthy to be in the Wonderbolts, or it was an accident, which would've demonstrated that she wasn't willing to learn how to better herself, which makes her unworthy to be in the Wonderbolts.

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