(SiC) Part 9 - Sailing Through The Storm

by Brian Jacko

When One Member Suffers, We All Suffer

Twilight Sparkle lazily sat back in her chair as she read another one of Mister and Misses Cake's reports about Pinkie's behavior. It was another good report and she didn't understand how this was all playing out so well, but she kept rolling with the punches. Twilight took a sip of her herbal tea and thought about what she could do in her spare time. Perhaps she could work on that math problem that she had been trying to solve for an entire week, or maybe she could create a new and cool idea for her Dungeons and Dragons campaign that she was working on. Twilight continued to ponder about what she could do in her spare time today until there were sudden frantic knocks on her door. Twilight was hoping that she'd get some peace and quite today, but it looked like that wouldn't be happening. Maybe it was more skeptical ponies wanting to question her about her faith or perhaps it was Granny Smith coming to ask her questions in which she had still been waiting for to happen. The knocking on the door grew louder and more impatient. "I'm coming!" she yelled out in a slightly annoyed tone of voice. She wished that Spike was there to answer the door but he was not home at the moment. The thought had suddenly hit her that it might be those terrorists who sent her that letter about assassinating her if she dare spoke of the truth in public again. She paused in fear as she stared at the door. Each loud knock seemed to make the door cave in slightly and it made her heart race with fear and anxiety. Twilight took several deep breaths and quickly prayed that she'd be safe. She slowly opened up the door and there she found Pinkie Pie with her mane and tail flat, and her coat a darker shade of pink. As unpredictable and random Pinkie was, a dark coat and a flat mane and tail always meant the same thing; something is terribly wrong. "Oh boy," Twilight said. "Are you okay? What's the problem?"

"Mister Cake found a mistake!" Pinkie Pie yelled out. Her breathing was heavy and she looked distressed.

"A mistake?" Twilight asked. Twilight took notice of some of the ponies walking outside and staring at them which made her feel a bit uncomfortable. "Why don't you come inside and tell me what's wrong?"

Pinkie Pie did so and put her bottle of pills on a table. "Mister Cake was just checking to see if I had enough pills to make it through the week and he said that these were just empty capsules with nothing in them! I didn't believe him at first, but when he opened them up, there truly was nothing in them! I can't believe one of my best friends would trick me into something like this. It doesn't make sense because I heard you making my pills up when I went down into the basement with you. I know you're not the element of honesty, but I thought Christians should never lie and it just really seems like you lied to me very badly."

Twilight looked into Pinkie's eyes; they looked as if they were going to start crying at any moment. "Well, crap," Twilight muttered to herself.

Pinkie's ears perked up. "And now you're going to use a profane word and add more sin to the lies that you have told me?"

"Um, I actually used that word in order to not use another certain word that I was thinking of. But it can be I suppose, just not always," Twilight said. "Remember the story about eating sacrificed meat to idols?"

"What the hay does eating sacrificed meat to idols have anything to do with cussing?" Pinkie asked.

Twilight frowned. "Never mind, I can explain it later. It's not important right now anyway. What's important is that we talk about this situation."

"So why would you trick me like this? I thought we were all about honesty here, especially Applejack."

Twilight sat down. "Well, I wasn't really lying or trying to trick you, but what happened was that you took the wrong bottle. The bottle you took had a label that said capsules which wasn't the one I intended for you to take. I must have forgotten to put it away, but I mean, it was labeled and you could clearly see through the capsules. I really don't understand how you thought that was supposed to be your medicine, but it was truly working, at least until Mister Cake spoiled the surprise."

"But why would you allow such a thing like that to happen and why did it seem to work?" Pinkie asked.

"Partly because I was fascinated that a pill that wasn't even disguised as a placebo pill was still giving you a positive effect, but mainly because I wanted to save some money since this treatment plan isn't very cheap and we have been helping you with money ever since that day when you gave away your entire life savings. It worked for a while because your mind truly believed that somehow that empty capsule was full of medicine. The very first pill I gave you was white, so I don't know what was going through your mind when you took that bottle."

Pinkie Pie was deep in thought for a moment. "Perhaps I thought that maybe these were made differently or you used your magic to make them look all clear like that. I just figured that you wanted me to take the bottle with more pills. I have never taken any pills in my life so I wasn't sure. I guess I'm just that dumb; I'm sorry."

"Hmmm. You're not dumb, you just think very differently and in ways that I'd never expect. I have to play everything extra safe and simple with you."

"I thought that maybe you didn't love me anymore and were trying to trick me to be mean. I got all freaked out and began having trouble breathing."

'Nonsense," Twilight said. "You're part of our team and we'd never leave any pony behind, especially one that has filled our lives with one of the best medicines of all time."

"What medicine have I ever given you all?" Pinkie asked.

"Laughter," Twilight answered.

"I still make you girls laugh?" Pinkie asked. "I feel like I have been doing a really poor job at that."

"You'll get it back," Twilight said reassuringly. "You don't have that cutie mark for nothing, you know. Sometimes a little bit of levity is needed in our lives and you're the perfect pony when it comes to providing us with playful puns, jokes and random silliness."

"So what do we do now?" Pinkie asked while looking at the bottle.

"We give you the real stuff," Twilight answered. "You were quite the placebo Pie for a while and the placebo effect is real and quite common, especially when doing the golden standard of medical testing, the double blind study."

"What is a placebo pill?" Pinkie asked.

"It's a fake pill that's made to look and even smell like the real one, sometimes, filled with sugar. What's crazy is that sometimes ponies going through the test do better on the fake pills compared to the ponies who are taking the real ones."

"So am I going to do worse on the real stuff?"

"We'll have to try it out and see. The mind is a powerful thing and now that you know that you weren't taking any medicine, the empty capsules you were taking before is obviously not going to work for you anymore, and being that you're discouraged right now might also have an outcome on how the real stuff works."

Pinkie Pie put her head down. "Oh."

At this point, Twilight felt that she owed her an apology, especially when noticing that she still seemed quite sad. "Listen, I'm really sorry that you got freaked out and thought that maybe I didn't care about you, but I hope you understand about the reasoning behind why I chose to do what I did. Are we still cool?"

"Yeah," Pinkie sighed. "I guess we're cool."

"What's that thing called that Rainbow Dash and Applejack do again?" Twilight asked as she put her hoof out? "A bro-hoof?"

"Yeah," Pinkie said and then softly tapped her hoof against hers. Such a simple act put more faith and trust back into her unicorn friend once more.

Twilight smiled for a moment. "Let's get you the real deal so that we can get you calmed down and feeling better." Twilight grabbed Pinkie's bottle and walked over to the basement door.

Pinkie Pie followed her, hoping that she wold get just as good, if not better results from taking the real thing.

Twilight walked over to the table that had the bottle that was originally intended for Pinkie. She put the bottle she was carrying back into a drawer and then opened up the bottle with the real medicine that she made a while ago. She then took out a pill and opened it up, letting some of the powder spread out across the table. "See? This is the real deal."

Pinkie Pie leaned over and smelled the powder for a moment, trying to get a sense of what the real deal smelt like. She looked back up and asked, "So this is really it, huh? How can I be one hundred percent sure that this isn't another trick like some kind of fake powder?"

"Because I'm your friend who cares about you very much and you can either trust me or take the second option which I don't think you would ever want to consider."

"What's the second option?"

"Going to a medical doctor where they are free to treat you as they wish with whatever harmful drugs they might choose and may decide to also lock you up in the pillow room."

"Right," Pinkie said. "I'll stay with you. I just have to try really hard to force my mind to believe that this is the real deal."

Twilight carefully used her magic and put the powder back into the capsule before sealing it. She then used her magic to summon a cup of water and levitated the pill and the cup over to Pinkie. "Go ahead, here's some water if you need it."

Pinkie stared at the pill surrounded by Twilight's magic for a moment. The reflection of the pill could be seen in her eyes as it hovered up and down in the air slightly. Pinkie then jumped towards the pill, snatching it with her mouth and began to chew.

"Er, Pinkie. That's not going to taste good. There's a reason why I put the powder in the capsule."

Pinkie's face twisted with disgust and great regret, but she had to do it. She swallowed the pill and experienced the very unpleasant after taste that it left in her mouth.

"Um, water?" Twilight asked. "That probably didn't taste too good. Why did you do that?"

Pinkie Pie put her hoof up, refusing the water. She stuck her tongue out several times in an attempt to make the bitter and strong taste get off her tongue. "Because I need to know what the real stuff tastes and smells like. I need to do this every time to make sure that my mind knows that it isn't a trick."

"If that's what you need to do to feel better for now, I'm not going to object. Some ponies break capsules open because it is possible that swallowing the powder or mixing it in a drink might help one's body to absorb the medicine slightly better. Hopefully, the actual medicine will kick in after a few weeks and you won't need to keep doing that," Twilight said as she put the water on the table.

"I hope so too," Pinkie said as she put her head down. "I'm worried that I have some kind of permanent chemical imbalance in my brain that may never get fixed, and then I'll need to take anti-depressants for the rest of my life."

"There has never been a single study that favors the monoamine hypothesis when it comes to depression," Twilight answered.

"Say what?" Pinkie asked.

"It's the idea that depression is the result of a certain kind of chemical imbalance in the brain, such as under-activity of serotonin. There's compelling evidence that suggests that antidepressants actually create abnormal states rather than repairing the issue. A good analogy for the use of antidepressants can be compared to drinking alcohol for its dis-inhibiting effects; just because booze can ease one’s social phobia, does not imply that alcohol is an appropriate treatment nor a correcting agent. You don't want to take anti-depressants, and there are plenty of good reasons for that, like the fact that they can lead to chronic illnesses, increased treatments that can make you relapse, chronic brain impairment, a dramatic decrease to your libido, and even decreased benefit from exercise and healthy eating, just to name a few. You can always check out the FDA reporting system called FAERS, which is also referred to as MedWatch; reading some of these real life stories are like that of a horror movie."

"I just want to feel better. Maybe it's not because there's something wrong with my brain, but because I always feel like Satan is attacking me with his crooked claws and and sharp fangs. He's so hideous."

"Crooked claws and sharp fangs? Hideous appearance?" Twilight asked. "Pinkie, I don't think you're describing the Lucifer of the Bible. If anything, he's one of God's most beautiful creations and Satan doesn't want to attack you in the way that you're imagining, but would rather appear to be a friend and deceive you into rebelling against God in clever ways. Satan is the author of confusion, deception, lies and discord. You know that even demons are fallen angels who willingly followed the devil into rebellion against God."

"Hmmm, I guess that makes more sense." After a moment of thinking to herself, she picked her head back up and looked at Twilight. "Listen, can you be ultra honest, I mean like brutally Applejack honest with me?"

"Sometimes brutal Applejack honesty says things that shouldn't be said at certain times," Twilight Sparkle answered.

"Right, but who do you consider to be the weakest and your least favorite out of our Sisters in Christ group? How could it not be me? I'm always getting myself into some kind of trouble and am usually holding the group back in some way."

"Actually, it's funny you ask that and while nothing could ever replace the unique friendship I have with each and everyone of you, I have to say that you're by far my most personal favorite member even if you do tend to get under my coat sometimes."

"Why?"

"Because even though I get frustrated trying to figure you out and am often baffled by how you think, you always make our group more interesting and make me have to be more creative." A smirk appeared on Twilight's face as she continued. "And I can't help but admit, you are the most unique member of our group and you make me smile the most. Think about the elements we represent in our group. We know why Applejack and Rainbow Dash are best friends because honesty and loyalty mix together very well. We know that Rarity and Fluttershy tend to spend the most time together because kindness and generosity are very similar traits. That leaves us together with magic and laughter and both of those elements blend together very well."

"Wow, I didn't know you felt that way about me, especially now because I have been struggling so much. I figured that I'm more of a burden to you all with all these problems in my life. Why do I seem to have the most trouble?"

"We all have problems, Pinkie, but I understand some more than others and that's why we are here for each other. When I am struggling, I like to think of my life as a story being written by God. Have you ever written a story, Pinkie?"

Pinkie Pie shook her head no.

"When I suffer and have conflict in my life, I imagine that God, our great story maker is just writing a more interesting chapter in my life. When we write stories, we need to have some kind of conflict or else the story falls flat and is not interesting, and let's face it, you are an incredibly interesting character with lots of great stories to tell about your life experiences." Twilight thought about matters even more. "You can also think about God being our real life dungeon master like when we play Dungeons and Dragons. God is the game master and no matter how the dice fall, the game plays on. It's kind of interesting to note that we know that awesome stories are told in conflict, but we are unwilling to embrace the potential goodness of the story we are in. When things go wrong in reality, ponies tend to think God is an unjust monster rather than a master storyteller. When we pick up the newspaper, we grieve when we hear about tragedies happening, yet we crave more of it when we read a book or watch a movie."

"How do you define a story," Pinkie asked.

"Basically, a story is a character who wants something and overcomes conflict to get it and death should remind us that the story we are living in has finality. We have a story to live and we can sometimes be unwilling victims rather than grateful participants. If the point of life is identical to the point of a story, then the point of our lives is character transformation."

"Oh," Pinkie said. "So does this mean I have to become different?"

"We actually don't have a choice in that matter."

Pinkie Pie looked confused.

Twilight continued. "We often get stuck into thinking that we are simply one of a kind and that we can't change, but the truth is that we're literally changing all the time! For example, our bodies essentially recreate themselves about every six months. Just about every cell of bone, skin and hair dies and another is directed to its former place. It's pretty amazing when you think about it."

Pinkie Pie put her head down. "But I don't want to change at all. I don't even want to grow older."

"That's actually a normal feeling, Pinkie. We are creatures of habit and it's very hard to get us to change our routines. Sometimes, we have to to be forced to change whether we like it or not. We are designed to seek order and comfort and when we get what we want, we tend to plant ourselves in it even if our comfort really isn't that comfortable, and even if we see and want something better, we will not move and be content where we are. Think about how many ponies stay in an abusive relationship because of this reason alone. We like to know what to expect in life and we like to have a sense of control; this alone can be very damaging. Most of the time we don't really choose to move in life, we have to be forced. Familiarity can be a horrible thing, but thankfully, you're a very unique mare who I don't think will get stuck like so many poor ponies do. You may have been away and alone from everypony for a long time, but you're here now and you're trying to get better. When bad things happen in life, we can either choose to get bitter or better. Just look at Job in the Bible; he responds even before his wealth and health is restored, by saying, all of this is too wonderful for me. Job found contentment and joy, outside the context of comfort, health, or stability."

"So what do you think when ponies say that life is meaningless?" Pinkie asked.

"Well, I wonder if what they really mean is that their lives are meaningless and they are simply projecting their misery onto others. As the saying goes, life without God is like a pencil that is not sharpened, it's pointless. I know you're afraid and fear is actually a double edged sword; it protects us from doing stupid things or getting humiliated, but fear is also a very manipulative emotion that keeps us from achieving what we were ultimately made to do. I'm more than willing to live a better story with you, Pinkie."

Pinkie sighed. "I just want the happy ending of the story of my life to happen; I just want to be okay with all of you again and to meet my dream goals."

"There are no climaxes in our stories. What you're thinking of is like doing a mini-side quest in Dungeons and Dragons. For instance, we may have small victories and get that thing we really wanted like that time when you finally found that really big freaking fire sword in that hidden cave after we defeated that monster. You were searching for that weapon for so long after that wizard we rescued told us about it and where to look for it. When we finally found it, you were ecstatic once you you were finally able to put it in your inventory, but what happened next?"

Pinkie put her head down. "I found out that it was cursed and it caused me to become tired. The longer I carried that sword with me, the less I was able to move my character on the board. I had to eventually abandon it because it was causing me more harm than good." Pinkie looked rather distraught while thinking about it. "I miss that sword so much and I had so much fun with it."

"And that's what happens in life too! Sometimes, we dream to make that sports team, or we may crave to have that dream spouse and eventually get it, but that's not the finality of our life story and it's not the happy ever after ending either. New problems arise and we begin to realize that getting on that sports team and getting injured isn't very fun, or your spouse turns out to be abusive in some way. Our stories and our conflicts keep going on until we die. I think what keeps our group together is the fact that I believe none of us see each other as the ultimate solution for our problems in life. We simply treat each other as any other normal pony, and when others try to think too highly of their friends, they are let down with devastating feelings. We don't view our friendships as the cure all problems in life, and as Applejack puts it, we are just simply gal pals who thirst for the word of God. We even expect to make mistakes and when we do, there's grace among our group."

"They used to teach me in church that we may try to fill the holes in our hearts with sex, drugs, and lots of cupcakes with ice cream, but only Jesus can fill that emptiness. I sometimes feel like Jesus doesn't do that for me anymore."

"Well, to tell you the truth, that's basically a lie that's commonly told to young fillies and colts. When you think about it, it's biblical theological twisted to something like an infomercial. Yes, one day Jesus is going to make things perfect and I'm sure that we're all going to be wearing party hats and eating ice cream cake with Jesus, but not now. The Apostles never said that we'll experience some kind of utopia by following Jesus. Just look at what happened to them. Paul was stoned nearly to death, moved from prison to prison and routinely abused. According to some reports, Peter was crucified upside down. Isn't it hard to imagine how a religion steeped in so much horrific suffering and sacrifice turned into a promise for some kind of earthly euphoria? I do believe that Jesus can make things better, but in no way do I think for a second that He's going to make everything perfect right here and right now; we have to wait a while for that. It really annoys me when I see Christians thinking that they'll bring about the utopia by having everyone go to a church with bright flashy lights, modern praise and worship music, and tons of coffee. Atheists are guilty of their own ideas of what the utopia would be like as well. It's actually damaging to believe in the myth of being able to achieve some kind of perfect society. You remember how I talked about what can happen as a result of ponies trying to bring about the utopia during our last Bible study. Millions of innocent ponies were slaughtered by means of achieving a perfect society that led to more madness. Ponies are even guilty of thinking that they can make their own lives complete. There seems to be this nagging feeling that life could be perfect if only you had this job, or if only you had this spouse and so on. We think we will be made whole by our accomplishments, our social status, or our possessions. We willingly believe that life is no longer beautiful until we get the things that we desire."

"Those are good points, but sometimes you make me think too hard and it hurts my head. I just try to think of that song that we learned as fillies." Pinkie Pie cleared her throat. "With Jesus in the boat you can smile through the storm, smile through the storm, smile through the storm. With Jesus in the boat you can smile through the storm, when you're sailing hooooome."

"It's good to think sometimes, and it's my hope and goal to get the entire group to think more and ask good questions, and that's a great song to think of when you're having problems. I don't think you realize how special you are to me and the whole group. I'm willing to suffer and hurt with you. I want you to know that I'm willing to cry with you and sacrifice everything to make sure that we stay together. I'm willing to give up my life for you, and I pray that we may live the best lives that we can possibly live."

"Wow, you really are the best friend I could possibly have. I know you try to make me think more, but it's so hard when I can't focus on anything. I get so discouraged that when I try to throw parties to cheer myself up, they always end up becoming pity parties and those are no fun at all."

"And that's where I hope the lithium might help in getting you to focus better. I'll also make sure to write back to Mister and Misses Cake about this whole misunderstanding."

"It's such a shame how I was on the verge of committing suicide whenever I got upset," Pinkie admitted.

"And if you're ever tempted to think about ending your life, I'd like to let you know that suicide does not end the chances of life getting worse, suicide eliminates the chances of life ever getting better, and it also greatly hurts other ponies who really do love and care about you. When you think about it, suicide is a very selfish act and I hope you know that you have a lot of ponies who truly cherish you. I'm sure you wouldn't want to hurt us in such a terrible way by taking your life and leaving us in agony and sadness. You represent laughter and happiness to us and that's how we'll always want to remember you. Try to remember that everyday is a gift when you're feeling blue."

Pinkie Pie was deep in thought. "Today is a gift, huh? Is that why they call it the present?"

Twilight giggled. "Sure, Pinkie. Sure."

"I've got another question," Pinkie said. "Do you think God needs me?"

"No."

Pinkie Pie put her head down. "Oh. It's just like that nightmare I had where you told me that Jesus doesn't love me."

"But that's not what you asked," Twilight said. "You asked if God needed you and He doesn't."

Pinkie Pie became more sad. "So I guess he needs ponies who are better, like Rainbow Dash and you."

"No he doesn't."

Pinkie Pie picked her head up and looked confused. "Wait, but Rainbow Dash is like super, super awesome. How can He not need her?"

"Pinkie, as cool as Rainbow Dash is, He doesn't need her, you, me, or anypony. We need Him! We have a great privilege to take part in the doing of God's will, which pleases Him greatly and the Bible makes it clear that if somepony doesn't want to do the Lord's will, then He will find some other pony to do it." Twilight pointed her hoof against Pinkie's chest. "I know you want to bring glory to God deep down inside and while you hit a bump in the road, I believe that you will bounce back and God will use you in awesome ways. Be of good cheer, He loves you and wants the best for you. You just have to listen and put on the armor of righteousness when confronted with evil. You can't go to battle unprepared and the Holy Spirit is here to help you."

"I remember you read us passages about the Holy Spirit leaving some and I'm afraid because I don't want to be left alone or lose my salvation. Is there anything I should do right now? Like start tithing again?"

"That's true," Twilight said. "Although the Spirit operated differently in the Hebrew scriptures like what you're thinking of when He would come on and off ponies sometimes, but in the New Testament, He actually indwells inside believers and it is no longer a temporary thing. You know that the Spirit's work took on a different character after Pentecost. You may be able to think of the Spirit leaving certain ponies in the Old Testament, but that's not how it is these days, ever since the Lord spoke of the coming of the Holy Spirit who would be our helper. As for tithing, I don't think you should partake in that right now since all of us are still helping you regain some money when you gave your entire life savings away to that one stallion. In fact, tithing is by far the laziest and easiest way for a Christian to give back to God. We can come up with other creative ways to give back that are more meaningful and helpful than dropping a few bits into the basket. You're not going to lose your salvation like how Applejack was terrified of losing hers. The Bible says do not be afraid three hundred, sixty five times through out the books. That's a daily reminder everyday throughout the entire year. Fear actually raises cortisol levels and makes our immune systems not function properly. What Bible verse do we quote every time we play Dungeons and Dragons together?

"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. I think that's from the book of Psalms," Pinkie said.

"That's right, and I hope that you'll be brave and mare enough to remind yourself that you can battle and keep Satan and his demons away from you only with the help of God; It is impossible for us to do so without Him. I'd also like to remind you that you wouldn't be alive if God didn't have a purpose for you. It doesn't matter what age you are; If you're still here, then God still has something for you to do. Most of our worst fears tend to be relational. Many ponies think that life is simply about getting money, acquiring flashy new things and security, but the truth is that it all narrows down to relationships, and your relationship with Jesus is the most important."

There was an awkward silence for a moment as the two ponies stared at each other. Twilight was reminded that she had a busy day ahead of her, but she was willing to give her entire day to helping Pinkie if she needed it.

"So is everything clear? Remember, you can take more than one pill if you feel like you need to. I started you out on what would be considered a very low dose and we can safely increase the dose later if needed."

Pinkie Pie nodded her head yes.

Twilight thought of something else that she could give Pinkie and summoned a pen and a piece of paper. She jotted some things down on the piece of paper and gave it to Pinkie. "I'd also like you to take this and put it somewhere where you can easily find it the next time you're struggling. This will also help you along with the medicine."

Pinkie Pie took the note and read it. "We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance." Pinkie Pie looked confused for a moment. "Where does that quote come from?"

"It comes from God and that's what He wants you to know the next time you are hurting. He's only going to use your pain and experiences to help you grow in the faith."

Pinkie Pie was reminded of what her mind was like when she was suffering and recalled an instance that made her feel very awkward. "Hey, Twi? I'm sure that you're busy and want me to go, but I have to confess something that I think was very wrong."

"What happened?"

"I was getting really agitated and my mind seemed to unintentionally think of something bad."

"It happens," Twilight said.

"No, this was like abominable bad. The kind of bad, bad that sends ponies straight to Hell I think."

"Go on, what did you think?"

Pinkie Pie frowned. "I thought to myself, Jesus bucking Christ as I was having a really bad episode of agitation and fear. I'm a little bit worried that He won't forgive me for that and that you might reject me from our group." Pinkie Pie looked down and rubbed her front leg with her hoof in a guilty manner. "I'm so sorry."

Twilight smiled warmly and asked, "First of all, did you get right with God?"

"It was the very first thing I did after I thought that."

"Then you don't have to worry and be in fear. I hear that phrase quite a bit from some of my secular friends."

"Yeah, but I'm supposed to be better than that since I'm a Christian and have more responsibilities. Don't you think God expects me to do better?"

"Well, yes," Twilight said. "And there are plenty of non-believers who out Jesus many Christians in this world, but my point is that you did the right thing by getting right with God and repenting. You are acting like God can't handle what you said and are forgetting how big He is. He can handle a phrase like that and it's wrong to live in guilt. Guilt comes from the enemy, conviction comes from the Holy Spirit. What you need to do is accept that He has forgiven you and pray for the protection of your mind."

"You took that a lot better than how I was expecting you to react," Pinkie said.

"Well, it's true. It sort of reminds me of ponies who think burning the Bible in public will somehow hurt or destroy God which is an incredibly narrow minded and ignorant view of God and in the same regard, God is not going to be offended over criticism or phrases that some think or say. God is not going to love you any less because you thought that and neither am I. He loves you as if you were the only thing in the universe; He thinks of everyone that way." Twilight paused for a moment and thought to herself. "Kind of like the way you love everyone and want to be their friend no matter who they are."

"But I did some really bad things and I honestly think I'm crazy, Twi. Don't you think I'm crazy?"

Twilight smiled and sighed at just how insecure Pinkie must have been feeling by asking all of these questions. "You just proved to me that you aren't crazy."

"How did I do that?" Pinkie asked.

"Because I have been with ponies who are truly crazy and there is one very common thing they all say; I'm not crazy and everyone else around me is crazy except for me. They stay in denial no matter what they do or say and you know that you need help, but who doesn't in life? None of us are perfect creatures. Besides, Jesus is crazy anyway."

"He is!?" Pinkie asked feeling shocked that Twilight would say something like that.

"He sure is, Pinkie. He's absolutely crazy about you," Twilight said as she took her hoof and tapped Pinkie on her snout. "Boop!"

Pinkie Pie's mane and tail became slightly puffy again and she hugged Twilight.

Twilight almost lost her balance and fell over from the surprise attack hug. "Uh, careful, Pinkie. Please don't break my bones with your ultra violent hugs."

"I think I only reserve those for Dashie," Pinkie said. She giggled and then kissed her friend on her cheek. "Thanks for being here for me when no one else seems to understand me very well. I don't even understand myself very well." She let go of Twilight and smiled.

"You're very welcome, Pinkie; I try to do what I can for you. Thanks for not giving up on us and staying strong. I can't feel or experience what everything is like for you, but I understand that it's very hard for you."

"I guess I'l be seeing you then," Pinkie said as she took the note and the bottle of pills and began to head back up the stairs. She turned around for a moment and said, "Thank you, Twilight. Thank you for everything. I really mean it."

"If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it," Twilight said. "You're welcome and I pray to hear good news."

Pinkie Pie smiled once more and then continued to make her way up the stairs.

Twilight rubbed the side of her cheek from where she had been kissed as she watched her friend depart. She thought about how different Pinkie Pie was from everypony else that she knew. She was by far the most overly affectionate pony and even though her public displays of affection made some of her friends feel uncomfortable, she knew that Pinkie Pie meant well and that's just how she was. She was also painfully oblivious so many times and at some of the most obvious things that were so simple to grasp, yet she could often see things that nopony else could see or understand. She was genuinely unique and while Twilight gave up trying to figure out how her Pinkie senses worked, she would never give up on trying to keep a good friend healthy, be it physically, spiritually or mentally. Twilight looked around her lab a bit before heading towards the stairs. She was thankful that today wouldn't be so stressful and also that because she had been putting limits on how much others could get of her time, she would be more relaxed.