• Member Since 21st May, 2012
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Kodeake


I read. I write. I edit. I Twidash. But above all else, I'm just a regular guy. Shoot me a PM if you have a question.

Sequels1

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Source

Rainbow Dash has dreamed of being a Wonderbolt for as long as she can remember. She's trained herself every single day to be better at her craft so she may one day join the team. But, when her dreams finally seem achievable and she is just about to reach out and grab them, a rumor breaks loose, leading to her goals slipping out of her grasp. Hopes and spirit gone, she must clear her name or forever have cheated dreams.

My entry for the Twidash Competition, "Framed".
EDIT: I have received third place in the competition this was entered in!

New cover art generoulsy provided by Angelic Flight over on DA. Go check her stuff out!

Chapters (26)
Comments ( 239 )

very nice! can't wait for more!

Whats the chance of me listening to this song while reading this story...

I always love your TwiDash stories Kodeake and this is looking promising, awaiting more, also, I hope you're feeling better as of lately, I've read your blog few days ago "Stress" it was called, just remmember that there is always sunshine after a rainy day :twilightsmile:

3769899
Thanks. And yeah, I've been meaning to post a follow up blog for that. I'm feeling a lot better about everything now. When I made that blog it was like 1 AM and my mind was running rampant making everything seem worse than it was. But I'm a lot better now.

Anyway, I do hope you enjoy the coming chapters!

I am normally not a big fan of Twidash. That being said, ya dun good.

In my head canon, I now see Rainbow Dash with a silver, lightning bolt necklace. Was that your original idea or did you see it in a fan-art or something?

3774343
It was actually partially inspired by a previous story of mine, where Twi gave her a necklace with a combination of their CM's (they were already in a relationship at that point in the story). At the time it was an original idea, as far as I'm aware.

3774351 Holy cow, that was fast! The story is great, btw, and I was actually in the process of adding a few of your other stories to my read later list. A lot of them seem interesting, especially 'Under Our Wing'.

3774355
My advice for my stories; stay away from anything with the rewrite pending tag in the description. Most of those were written well before I had any amount of skill to speak of.

However, UOW is actually on of my better works, though I have to warn you that the current description isn't accurate; I changed the plot line recently and I need to go and change the tags and description. It is still a Twidash Scootadoption, though.

3774364 YAY! I've been searching for more of those. Gotta luv em'!
Warning acknowledged.:twilightsmile:

Certainly liking the setup so far.

I feel that this was a very well written chapter, and it really helped grab my interests. In the beginning, I could really feel Rainbow's anxiety. I can see the importance of the necklace already growing, and I'm excited to see how Rainbow (I assume it's Rainbow) gets framed and how this all comes together.

3791586
You should never assume....

How did this slip past me?

Eh, whatever, time for moar TwiDash. Better yet, another contest entry :twilightsmile:

Can't wait to see where this one will go.

3793039 Oooh, cryptic... I like.:trixieshiftright:

Whoever the buck did this is gonna be answering to two things: Twilight's magic blasts and my own tow hands wringing their neck! (Please don't let it be Lightning or Gilda that is way to cheesy I can't even.)

3800213
Id be a lair if I said Lightning never crossed my mind, but really; would a mare who would obviously have a reason to ruin Dash's career hold any ground, especially with Spitfire?

3800222 True but still please don't go down the lane of cheesiness. I'm already down that road already but you can still save yourself!

3800227
She crossed my mind, but I'd never go for that. I'm going a different route where the focus is more on Twi and Rainbow and the effects this has on them rather than the pony who accused her of cheating. I wouldn't even go for Gilda.

3800240 Sweet. Hopefully this will end on a happy note.

Ah, the intrigue, angst, anxiety, anticipation... Tis' too much, we require moar!!

3800412
Unfortunately, that may be slightly.... impossible. I just made a blog about this but I'm not going to be able to type for a while. I just developed Carpal Tunnel Syndrome, so my hand is gonna be out of commission for the next couple days. I'll be back at is as soon as I can, though.

3800456 Ah, that is a good excuse.

I suppose I can wait *pretends she isn't counting seconds on the clock* I should go and write for my own fic anyway.
Best of luck!

I have a feeling that it'll have something to do with the locket/pendant/necklace. Time will tell though.

Also, take your time with recovery. Carpal Tunnel is a serious injury, one that could affect you for the rest of your life if you're not careful with it. I've seen a friend's future carreer in programming be almost ripped from him because of it. Even if it eventually means you'd have to pull out of the contest (which I don't think you'd have to do, but if it does come to it), do it. Your hands are one of your most useful tools, in not just writing, and being in agony and not being able to move them without being in agony is a serious injury.

Take care mate.

3801477
Which is precisely why I'm not doing anything but what I absolutely have to with my hand. I've been lucky in that the past couple times I've had it it hasn't been too bad and only lasted a couple days, and I'm hoping this will be gone soon too. If it does take too long, though, I have two chapters ready to be posted, and I can get my usual editor to get them instead of doing it myself.

once your hand heals be sure to not let your hands rest on the keyboard while you type and to stop and stretch your hands ever so often.

3801477 Same here, perhaps somepony believes that the neckle she wore had some magical attributes that assisted Rainbow in some way....?
But as you wrote, time will tell.

And hope your hand will get better soon Kod, best wishes. :rainbowdetermined2:

3804140
Continuing with the cryptic theme for my replies,

Sometimes you need more than a hunch....

And thanks. Hopefully I'll be back writing before the end of next week.

@Kodeake...

I had a LOT of trouble with reader believability for these two chapters (3-4). Mostly stemming from the "anonymous accuser" portion, which may or may not be from a misconception of use of Anonymity.

While not legally enforced as with government and military, professional sports and private business both adherently follow the same Rule of Law of a defendant being able to face their accuser. The former two may or may not be in open court, the latter two generally do so behind closed doors. The Wonderbolts may skirt the lines between military and professional sports as an air force squadron and an aerial exhibition team, but the point applies to both.

The difference in use of Anonymity is that in the public eye and media reporting. The accuser may request anonymity, in which another point-of-order, the media are not required to comply with (though most media services do, but not a 100% guarantee either).

So while said accuser may remain anonymous before the public and media, they may not do so behind closed doors before a review board &/or tribunal. They must stand forward with their accusation and evidence when called by the defendant(s) or heavily risk their charges being thrown out, regardless of weight of evidence. This measure is to prevent rampant accusations, "witch hunts," and the appearance of looking un-professional before the public & media.

Portraying negative public & media opinion towards Rainbow Dash is fine, but it comes from a faceless "source," with a voiceless accusation, brought with shadowy "evidence"... See the storytelling problem?

~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~

Conversely, while the above portion seriously hurt your storytelling, you did do the correct thing in having the accuser being investigated as well. That is something also often done in a case such as this.

Hope this helps clarify things.

Comment posted by Kodeake deleted Jan 27th, 2014

As far as I know anonymity is only offered to avoid actual danger to the accuser as a result. Protecting their reputation in the event that they lied is ludicrous, since they are basically damaging the other's reputation without risk of anything.

Why is Twilight's word not considered reliable? Literally the only evidence is what she just discredited and the accusation itself, from someone has just as much reason to be biased as her for more or less the exact same reasons.

3843084
My previous comment explained the anonymity, which I admittedly could have handled a bit better. As for the evidence.... this isn't over and Spitfire was just given new evidence at the end of the chapter if you'll recall.

3843084
3842117
Alright, I've done my research and can come back with serious arguments to the points you both made.

The "right to face one's accuser" is Amercian law only, the sixth amendment to be exact. And it is only in cases of formal charges through a court of law. It's not universal in our world. In Canada (where I am) we only have a right to face out accuser if they themselves are pressing charges against the defendant. During an investigation (as is this chapter) any informants are actually legally required to be kept anonymous. So, since this is Equestria, I'm going of my country's laws, and thus this chapter is totally accurate.

Oh, and I've been through all of this with a legal assistant with 20 years of experience in law. Everything is 100% correct and any issues you may have with the chapter are purely personal opinions or incorrect information on certain laws.

3852580

Fair enough.

To be honest I was bugged more by the Ponyville rumors. Why'd everyone suddenly mistrust Rainbow Dash? She's a very well known member of the community, and towns tend to close ranks over stuff like this, don't they? Also, where'd the rumor spread from; the wonderbolt agents that picked them up seem to be the only possible source (unless the accuser was local and spread it), but that would be ridiculously unprofessional of them...

3853817
The rumor would have spread through the escorts asking around town for Rainbow and Twilight. Of course, if two guys in suits came up to you asking for your friends, you'd probably ask why. They'd tell probably one or two ponies, and then it would spread through the town like any other piece of gossip. As for how the town turned against her, well, small towns tend to be very... protective of themselves and their citizens. Most of my family was raised in small towns all around Alberta, and if you got any form of bad reputation from doing something the entire town would know the next day, and if it was credible at all the town wouldn't be too impresses with it. Now they've had two "official" Wonderbolt representatives who've told them that Rainbow Dash and Twilight cheated on something incredibly serious. This would be seen as not only giving the town a bad reputation, but also as betraying the town and all its citizens-they'd all have known about Rainbow's Wonderbolt tryouts, and would likely all have been supporting her. Thus the anger they displayed.

Wait, so they bring in a relative of the accused, he casts a spell on it that claims it's magic, and everybody believes him without question? Surely Twilight would at least check it herself. He didn't even say what the spell was, or prove it wasn't recent. The friends' testimony was also 100% irrelevant; what did the necklace being new have to do with anything?

an interesting story, but it all holds one major flaw.
rainbow dash was capable of diong the Rainboom was a filly, nearly a decade or so before she even met twilight. they did not take that into account at all. which means they would have to furthe test it than simply making claims like this. such as examining if the power of the rainboom was enchanced in any way, as would happen if the enhancement charm was working. if it was not working, then it makes hte amulet suspect. why cast an enchantment that does not work?

also they coul test if twilight aura is on the amulet too. if it is not, then they have to find whose aura it belongs to.

3872355
Er... I never said he was a relative. He's a professional they brought in. I'm not sure where you got the idea he was a relative of anyone....

And the friend's statements have to do with the origins of the necklace; she could have gotten it from somewhere that sells enchanted items, or if any of them had known about her getting it enchanted, in case Twilight hadn't helped her with it.

3872457
You're working off of a lot of head canon here. Where did I say anything about aura and the unicorns having a unique aura? And it was shown int he show that no one believed Dash had done a Rainboom, they all still thought it was a myth until she'd done it again.

MOAR, now!!!

You know, it would be a lot quicker if Dash were to say, "Fine, I'll do it all again without the necklace"...
I suppose it would also be less fun... :scootangel:

That was the most iffy court-thing I have ever seen. But I just can't stop reading, iffy-court aside, it's shaping up to be a nice: "you betrayed me (but didn't really)" fic. Can't wait for more.

3889211
Iffy, maybe. Could it have been written better? Hell yes. Could I have been clearer about some things? Most definitely. Still technically accurate from a legal standpoint? Yes.

Anyway, glad you're enjoying it. Next chapter will be out... in about a week if I'm lucky.

3889221 I'm not questioning it's legal standings, just that Spitfire is being a bitch and her pseudo-justice system is a little lacking.

I can't wait to see how the conflict pans out.

Okay, okay, I know this is gonna sound really perfect writing freak like,:twilightblush: but, in the first paragraph you said "... Get everything you need to get done done." But you should have said "...need to get done, (comma) done."
Sorry I, a real grammar/writing freak:applejackunsure:

I hope these two work it out and that dick who framed Twi gets thrown in jail.

3872610 shrugs. there has to be some manner for them to investigate magically involved crime. considering unicorn magic is color coded, it would seem their magic is unique to them. perhaps the magic could become unnoticeable to radiant magic over time but one would presume the enchantment would be like their own magic for some amount of time before it decayed. like a fingerprint eventually being eroded away iguess.
even if you stick to your oirignal thought on it, it still does not prove that twilight WAS the one to enchant it. twilgiht would not know how to use that at first, but she could easily realize that it was weak enough that she could fight against them for rainbow dash.

this story does have a good idea behind it, the story needs a bit more thought put into it though. it is those touches that makes a story all the more enjoyable. put some thought in, okay how would the ponies go about investigating all of this? and how would this character react to that? felt that rainbow dash would ahve reacted much more violently and wrecked her home after having her dream shattered so violently. she is just that impulsive and owuld not know how ot emotionally deal with it otherwise.
i see something good in this. needs a bit more elbow grease.

3921405
Your problem is you assume everyone's head cannon follows the same logic. What's the point of proving who placed the enchantment when the enchantment was placed, and they know she was wearing the necklace during the competition? At this point it doesn't matter much who placed it. And besides, they themselves said nopony had had it besides them, so what point was there in investigating that? When the defense offers testimony incriminating themselves, what prosecution in their right mind would question it? As for the aura thing... well I can't give too many spoilers, but what I can tell you is that, in this instance, my head cannon does follow a similar path to yours (I'm modeling mine similar to the current DNA evidence, so it's similar to your theory with the decay thing). However, after the initial shock and the feeling of utter hopelessness that would have sunk in after the enchantment was found would have thrown Twilight's mind into a metaphorical tailspin. As far as she knows she's the only unicorn to have even touched that necklace. And After Dash accuses her of it, well, she's not going to be in her right mind, and may not be thinking clearly enough to think of such things.

As for Dash, we've already seen how she reacts after being rejected. I point you to Mare Do Well. She didn't react violently to being all but shunned, instead she became depressed and moped about on a cloud. This, while a larger scale, would still be essentially the same. Being rejected by those she wants so desperately to accept her. In Mare Do Well, it was her home town that she wanted to accept her as a hero. In this, it's the Wonderbolts she wants to accept her as Equestria's greatest flyer. However, I am planning to have her go through the "five stages of grief" and as such she will exhibit such anger. But not everyone experiences the stages in the same order, and some won't even exhibit all of them.

I think I've thought this out a little more than you thought I had.

Either way, I thank you for the feedback and I do tend to add a few things to the next chapters from your comments.

3921545 shrugs. i will keep an eye out then.

3921545 also was not being insulting, i just trying to give some suggestion.

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