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When Twilight returns back to Equestria after her time in the human world, she learns she lost something very important. Two things, in fact. Once you go hands, you never go back… for other appendages.

Thanks to alexmagnet for the help editing!

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 141 )
Garbo #1 · Jan 7th, 2014 · · 1 ·

*RainbowBob story hits the site*
*Goes to click it*
*Copious 502 errors ensue*
I postulate that the sheer awesomeness was not containable by Fimfic

Write that fucking Dredd story or I swear I'll fucking cut you

It took me a few tries to get the piano joke.

FIVE STARS! A+! FOUR STARS!

Its okay Twilight, Lyra knows that feel.

And it's been how long since that movie came out...?

Surprised no one's done this till now.

~Skeeter the Lurker

wow. I am very glad i can't empathize. My hands are still present

Twilight and Spike have no sense of restraint when it comes to new things, do they? :rainbowkiss:

After reading this, I swear I will never take my hands for granted again! Also, Spike, you either just blew your chances or sealed the deal with Rarity.

Hahahahahahah!!!!!!:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh: I LOVE this!!!!!!!!!!! Hahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!

Holy dang... This was hilarious! :rainbowlaugh:

It was too painful to click the back button without hitting the favorite first, dood.

Just way too painful, dood.:fluttershbad:

I wonder what I would do if I lost my hands. Probably start designing a prosthesis... What if, you used magic to control each individual joint? That would be pretty close! Sure you would lack touch, but that would allow you to do all the things Twilight mentioned. Fun.

Whelp Twilight went Lyra on us and the ending with Spike:rainbowlaugh:

you good sir get 3 staches :moustache::moustache::moustache:

Now Twilight knows how Lyra feels... too bad said unicorn wasn't there. :unsuresweetie:

Oh good, another story for me to love! I really found this hilarious! Especially this part:
“It isn’t the same, Pinkie! Can’t you all understand that?” Twilight asked with tears pooling in her eyes. “I can’t do jazz hands anymore, the peace sign, running my fingers through my mane, thumbing someone up, holding out my pinkie finger in a pretentious way while drinking tea to appear fancy, or even thumb-wrestling! All those experiences, gone! Gone forever! These are like chopsticks compared to sporks!” Twilight sobbed, holding her head in her hooves.

You just made my day! :D

Rarity tilted her head. “How do you know what my bottom feels like?”

:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Heh, fun little read. Good job, Bob!

TWILIGHT MASTURBATES!!!!

Twilight cradled herself in the feeble position

Fetal (or foetal, if you're English).

I wish I had hands. Oh wait! I do! I'm going to go mast . . . erm, master playing the piano.

3746248 A PRINNY! How rare around these part...Maybe i should tell Etna.

"My beautiful, soft as Rarity’s bottom, hands!”
Rarity tilted her head. “How do you know what my bottom feels like?”

“With fingers I could pick up an apple, type at a computer, play a guitar, and even mast—erm, master playing the piano.”

On the small list of things that are okay in this world, this story is at the top.

Twilight, cats knows that feel. Isn't that right cat?
i.imgur.com/UMHan.gif
Nevermind:twilightblush:

HAHAHAHA that was fucking brilliant!

I wanna know how Twilight knows about Rarity´s bottom, maybe she was talking about the EQG Rarity´s bottom :rainbowkiss:

“having hooves instead of hands is like going out to a movie and finding out the theater is really just a creepy, dark alley and that popcorn is just a euphemism for a mugging!”

This is the greatest simile in the English language. :rainbowkiss:

Oh, and the story was enjoyable as well. Don't worry, Twilight. I'm sure you'll be able to figure out hand-shaped telekinetic constructs easily enough.

3746945 that does not even begin to describe it, my friend

3746903 probably. How can we know? We can only wonder...

Now, Twilight knows how Lyra feels.

3746576
Darling, don't be uncouth. In polite society, we refer to the act as spending quality time with Mr. Showerhead. :raritywink:

“With fingers I could pick up an apple, type at a computer, play a guitar, and even mast—erm, master playing the piano.”

Nice save there! :rainbowlaugh:

Twilight having another nervous break down to the point of fetal position hoof sucking, that was gold.:rainbowlaugh:
But the ending bit from Spike was just to die! :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

3747126
Twilight's definitely smart enough to be a master debater.

3747321

Don't worry, Twilight. I'm sure you'll be able to figure out hand-shaped telekinetic constructs easily enough.

Yeah, fingers versus magic is really no contest; magic wins every time.

She can go join Lyra's club when she gets back to Ponyville.

Oh, come on. You wrote a fic about how amazing hands are and Lyra doesn't show up anywhere? :raritydespair:

Oh my god!This story is funny!I would have lose it two if I lost my hands.Maybe she should speak to Lyra

and even mast—erm, master playing the piano.”

:rainbowlaugh:
Oh god.

3748429 OH GOD! ITS IN MY BRAIN!!!!!

*BLAM* ewretfhgbmn

Twilight knows what Rarity's bottom feels like? I'm guessing that sleepover way back in season one included some midnight sessions in accordance with Molestia's lesson plan.

There, there Twilight. It's not that bad, maybe AJ can show you the art of hoof magnetism?fc06.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2012/256/2/8/applejack_and_her_marshmallows_by_sharydow-d58egm6.png

And this is one of the reasons it confuses me when a human in an HiE fic chooses to become a pony just to fit in. Yes, ponies probably won't look at you as weirdly any more, but unless there's a good reason, I'm keeping my fingers thanks.

3746576

So? She's single, what do you expect?

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