• Member Since 11th Sep, 2013
  • offline last seen September 11th

Justice3442


Horrifically Fun

Sequels1

E
Source

The Cutie Mark Crusaders decide they need to expand their numbers, but things quickly go awry when their first target begins sobbing on the spot. Sweetie Belle soon finds herself roped into hanging out with the young colt.

Can Sweetie Belle see past the young colts weirdness and allow friendship to bloom? Can Button Mash fake enough normal behavior to make at least one friend? Will these two hit it off, or are Button’s only friends destined to be the ones in his video games, forever?

Cover art by users Vallis and Novel-Idea

Chapters (26)
Comments ( 2844 )

The title reminds me of The Sweetie Chronicles: Fragments.

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Thanks! :heart:

I'm now officially juggling two multi-chapter fics, but I have a bit of chapter two worked out in my head, so I'll do my best not to make ponies wait for chapters here.

*Goes in to add story to groups*

*Goes to shipping group*

*Sees story is already added*

*Checks story to see it's already grouped all over the place*

Geez, you guys work fast! :rainbowderp:

Thanks! :rainbowdetermined2::pinkiehappy:

3745929 Not meaning to rush you but, How long do you think it's gonna take for chapter two? And Do you have a skype? o:

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I'm hoping a week max between chapters.

Hard to say, I'm used to spending an hour or two on my main-fic and adding a chapter ever 1 to 3 days there. I don't want to really slow down on that, so I'll be fitting in time to write this as I can, when ideas come to me (as mentioned, I have some idea of what chapter 2 will look like).

I can PM you skype details, though I'm very rarely on or in a position to chat vocally.

I'm really good about responding to PMs, though.

3745966 Ah alright PM me your skype details and we can chat there :)

I approve of this story continue to make more :coolphoto:

.....This one is too old for training.......I LOVE IT:rainbowkiss:

Nice story so far, I like it. However *Compensating your Joy Boy* should be *confiscating your Joy Boy*.

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Thanks! :pinkiehappy:

Thanks for pointing out the error, as well! I will fix it immediately!

3745834 it is AWESOME. You, deserve a gold star. To bad I have none...so take a derpy! :derpytongue2:

A little gripe, but nothing I can't fix: spaces after ellipses... please?

Great story. If only Humgonian were a real language. Then you could use it with translations. If you could, please try to use what Jan has put out there. Its the only Humgonian know throughout the universe. Now I'm off topic. A few errors still need fixing like this:

Button continued his creaming on the floor

. But all errors aside, great job!

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*Winces* that's a bad one...

Thanks though! I'll fix it!

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Yes, but only because you have an avatar from one of my favorite web-comics ever. :twilightblush:

(Actully, I saw your post on my phone and made the changes before I saw your avatar).

Anyhow, I tried to do it before words, and such.

I'll try to be mindful of this for future chapters.

Obviously, I'm a bit addicted to ellipses. :twilightoops:

Wow. This is really good! I'm looking forward to the next chapters!

This has massive cuteness and silliness and funness. :pinkiehappy:

Button is such odd ball. Best couple!

Ah hah! A fellow ButtonBeller, and one that doesn't make five hundred pop culture references with stuff like CoD or some such silliness.

I think you captured the Crusaders very well. You've got the little nuances of their personalities down very well, and this was quite an enjoyable read. I'll keep an eye on this for now, let's see how you do.

-Lumino

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:raritystarry: Thank you! I'm looking forward to writing more!

I'm very happy for the comment on the Crusaders. It's actually surprisingly difficult to write each one and make sure I don't simply have three copies of the same character! :twilightoops:

I really am liking this story. I hope more is on its way!

I LOL'ED HARDER THAN I SHOULD HAVE... ButtonBelle is starting to become my OTP.

On another note,

Sweetie Belle’s face contorted into a look of genuine anger. “Are you saying there’s something wrong with being white?!” She asked, her voice getting increasingly shriller.

Yes, if you're F***ING RACIST. :3

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You're not the only one. Like I said, it was a minor gripe and it's still a very good start. Looking forward to more.

First off, grats on the feature!
I see you're now trying to kill us with the diabeetus... I'm liking this, nice little bit of crusader slice o' life... With a side of Mash.
I like how you filled in a nice plausible way for those two to start hanging out a bit. I guess having Rarity for a sister made Sweetie a little braver in front of the "FACE OF DOOM"

Now for the obligatory error corrections:

“This was your idea, Sweetie Belle!” Apple Bloom reminded. “We’ll be right behind a.”

While we know Apple Bloom is reminding Sweetie Belle, you need to say so in the attribution as well. A simple 'her' would do the trick. I'm pretty sure you wanted to end the last sentence with 'ya'

“Oh… I guess that makes sense…"Sweetie Belle mused.

Need a space between " and Sweetie.

“I SEE NO PONY IS GETTING THEIR CUTIE MARK IN BRAVERY, TODAY!” She shrieked out after her friends.

'out' is unnecessary here.

Sweetie Belle looked as the mare seemed to nod with satisfaction.

She looked what? :unsuresweetie: I think there's a word missing here.

Past that is some minor stylistic differences that don't really matter...

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Thanks and thanks for the corrections! I have made them.

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Button smiled. “There are entire worlds that need saving!

“The peace loving ponies of the Hirulian plains need protection! And ponies cry out for relief and justice from the unrelenting criminals of Haythom!”

You just gave me a headcannon. And it has little to do with Button's video games.

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Oh, Celestia! I'm actually on the feature box now! :twilightoops:

This story was great. Can't wait to see more of it! :yay:

that. was........... AMAZING!!!!!!!!!! :pinkiegasp::pinkiegasp::pinkiegasp::pinkiegasp:

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:raritystarry:

Don't worry! Definitely going to write more.

3750429 GREAT! A Spike moustache for you! :moustache: And an extra because I love giving them out! :moustache:

Also, I really like your picture! Even though it kin of makes Button Mash look a little like Dan Vs. It's still amazing!

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