Return of the Thingamajig
“I’m telling ya Ed, there is no way that we’re all cartoon characters brought together by Canadian aliens.” Double D said as he held his head in irritation from listening to his dimwitted friend’s conspiracy theory.
“I’m telling you guys they control everything, how we look, how we talk and, how we go about our lives.” Ed said as he hid himself in a barrel in fear.
The other friends sighed and walked on through the dirt street. Ed, having seen his friends walk away from him, bursted the barrel into splinters and ran to their side. With the notion of no television or really anything to speak of, the Eds were spending this day just walking around and discussing just about anything. It had gotten to the point where Ed again brought up the idea of them being a canadian cartoon show, and along with the ponies, are just in some crossover story.
“With all that beside we gotta find a way to get some money in order to get those jawbreakers Pinkie Pie told us about.” Eddy said as he started to pace around the group.
“Well we could try selling apple cider from a machine designed to make it in a cost effective way.” Double D suggested, but Eddy waved a hand at him.
“That's a stupid idea, we’re scammers not businessmen!” Eddy yelled in anger thinking the idea was stupid. “Since these ponies don’t know anything about our reputation we could try doing some of our old scams. Don’t worry Sock head, we’re being cost effective. After all, we are recycling.”
“If our plans didn’t work back home why do you think do you think they will work here?!” Double D yelled knowing his idea was even stupider than the scam that led them to Equestria in the first place.
“We’re telling you Twilight, we don’t think those ruffians can be trusted!” Inside the Golden Oak Library, the air was tense. Six friends divided amongst themselves, three on one side and two on the other, now trying to get the neutral one on one of the sides. Rarity was the first to speak, and she said something she would look at as unlady like.
“I don’t know Rarity, those guys seem ok with me.” Pinkie said thinking her friends accusation of the trio was unjustified. She was happy at least one of her friends, Fluttershy, agreed with her, but still a little sad that her friends were arguing.
“Um… from what I’ve seen Ed seems to really love my chickens.” Fluttershy said shaking slightly from the glares her three other friends were giving her.
“Oh come on Fluttershy! If that little shrimpy one was able to trick me into giving him my extra room, than any of them can do that. Also with his con artist personality, they’re undoubtedly up to something.” Rainbow Dash said annoyed that her two best friends were defending the Eds.
“I can’t help but agree with Rainbow here. Something about them varmints just screams dishonesty to me.” Applejack replied, backing her friend’s viewpoint and even strengthening it.
“Guys, to be honest I’m sure the Eds are fine people. Sure Double D was annoying with labeling all the books in the library ‘Book’ and nearly labeled the entire library in a matter of hours, but they seem like good people.” Twilight said trying to stay as neutral as possible but was leaning towards the opposing team as memories were being rekindled.
“Well I hope you are right Twilight.” Rarity said., using a hoof to touch up her mane
Twilight looked down on the ground kicked at it. She really didn’t like this, not one bit. She knew they had some good in them. They wouldn’t do anything wrong would they?
meanwhile within town square
“Has this ever happen to you?” Eddy yelled towards an audience of ponies in the center of town as they saw Ed pretending to die of hunger, “Well things like this are a thing of the past with the Thingamajig!” he yelled as he revealed what appeared to be a small gumball machine filled with things that shouldn’t belong in a gumball machine. With a press of a button the machine fired out a candy apple towards Ed who opened his gigantic maw to practically inhale it, stick and all.
Double D was on the side of the two reading his script full of his lines, “There’s more!”
“You bet there is; Average Joe?” Eddy said with his usually salesman tone as he asked Ed a question but due to his empty headedness Ed completely oblivious to what was going on so Eddy had to slap him.
“I am in dire need of fruit.” Ed said gleefully as he looked at the crowd.
“Not to worry my friend, the Thingamajig will stop your need.” Eddy said pressing the machine again to release an apple towards him.
“No problemo.” Double D said in an irritated tone noticing that the scam was going exactly like it did back home.
“It changed my life.” Eddy said showing off the device again.
“Your smooth talk isn’t going to convince me that easily. What’s this gonna cost us hard workers?” A stallion in the crowd asked Eddy.
“Yeah, I bet it costs a lot.” A mare in the crowd added to the stallions question.
“An amazing product like this could cost up to a million bucks, but in the next five minutes you can have it for only two bits!” Eddy said hoping to seal the deal with the audience and pretty soon they started to crowd the display like a shark to blood.
“Finally! I’ll never run out of horn polish.” A unicorn said walking off with glee, hugging her Thingamajig box and walking away from both two bits and her intelligence.
“I can finally have an all purpose gardening tool!” An earth pony said walking off with his box.
“Gentlemen, I remember there being only one Thingamajig, but where did you get the fruit and sweets?” Double D asked as he saw the ponies acting idiotic as they cherished their boxes full of empty dreams.
“Oh, you know. From Applesnacks and Pink Dye’s place.” Eddy answered, sweat starting to roll down his neck.
“And I suppose that you paid for them or at the very least asked, right?” Double D asked, glaring at the head conman.
“We paid them with nothing, am I right Eddy?” Ed said giving away on how they got the food. Eddy saw this and activated the Thingamajig, causing a boxing glove to knock the living daylights out of Ed.
“Eddy how could you?” Double D asked furiously, “They helped us find sanctuary here and you reduced yourselves to thievery, oh I know you thought about this in an episode once but we never went through with it!”
“A what?” Eddy asked, looking into the blue sky, hoping his question would be answered.
Don’t ask me, I’m just the narrator.
“I can’t stand for this I’m reporting this!” Double D said as he ran off to who knows where.
“Eh, by the time they get here the cash will already been spent.” Eddy said as he walked off with the jar full of bits.
Double D ran towards Twilight and the rest of the main six as they were still debating about the Ed’s, “Twilight! I need your help, Eddy and Ed stole from Applejack and Pinkie Pie to trick ponies into buying boxes full of lies!”
“See! We told you that they can’t be trusted!” Rainbow Dash yelled only proving the Anti-Eds groups point.
“But Double D was the only one to be honest and confess.” Twilight interjected, “Anyway take us to them.” and with that the group followed Double D to where the other two were.
“What pigeons, right Ed?” Eddy asked his slow witted friend as the headed towards a hiding place for their money.
“But they’re ponies Eddy.” Ed interjected thinking Eddy was acting dumb.
“Whatever.” Eddy said annoyed.
“There you two are!” Twilight said coming in from a street corner, “You two are going to return all that money to the ponies you sold these empty boxes.”
“You’ll have to catch me first!” Eddy yelled pushing Ed towards them hoping to stall them as he made his quick getaway, “Now all I need is some spring shoes.” as he activated the machine to his unliking generated a sack full of rocks.
“No use running short fry!” Rainbow yelled flying towards Eddy.
“Come on I need a net or something.” Eddy said desperately but only gave out a book labeled ‘Running Away Like a Dork: for Dummies’ which only stalled Eddy long enough for Rainbow to tackle him into the unforgiving ground.
Eddy felt the same sting he did back in Peach Creek, but it only felt worse since he was forced to give the money back and apologize to every last pony he conned. His jar losing weight with every apology didn’t help either.
“Since y’all stole from us, the two of you need to prove to us that we can trust you.” Applejack said in disgust not even looking at Ed and Eddy.
“What about Sock head, he helped?” Eddy asked thinking Double D got off scot-free from the accident.
“He came and told us the truth he has my trust, but you two need to redeem yourselves.” Twilight said sternly towards Eddy as Ed looked like he knew he wasn’t going to be friends with pinkie after this.
Meanwhile in a mountain range
Look Rolf, all I’m saying is that maybe you’re a little too harsh on Wilfred.
“Rolf has no horse and Wilfred was the next best thing because Victor hates walking long distances.” Rolf replied to Intet thinking the use of Wilfred was justified
That’s all well and good, but did you really have to put a mountain of stuff on him? You haven’t even given the poor pig a break.
“He’ll take a break when he passes out!” Rolf yelled.
Right, then how are you going to find those “criminals” when Wilfred can’t even move?
“Easy Intet, watch this.” with that Rolf pulled out a slingshot the size of the Titanic to catapult him and the pig over various distances, “Behold the Farshooter! and now to demonstrate how we’ll get around if Wilfred passes out.” soon Rolf loaded both him and Wilfred into the colossal slingshot and flung them both far out of the mountain range.
I still think it’s unethicalllllllllllllllllllllllll!
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it took you a while but good chapter
A good read. Now to point out the mistakes:
This needs to be redone.
"Has this ever happened to you?" is what you are looking for.
Other than punctuation errors, the rest is pretty good. Don't get me wrong, its a good chapter, but you need to read over it again to make sure it all works.
~Rokkurin
LOL!
4583659 thank you for the help and now it is fixed
4583085 yeah, we've been busy in our lives so it's kinda hard to get any writing done. I hope we can satisfy the love of the Eds to everyone as fast as we can.
Ahhh the Thingamjig. Good memories....good memories. I really hope you pull out more of the classic scams.
4584904 oh trust me we've not begun the nostalgia rush of the scams of yesteryear
5939897 Rolf's that crazy
7385277 Rolf is just that crazy to be chasing them to the ends of the earth; the others are...well watch Big Picture show and you'll get it
Please continue this! I can't wait to see where this goes. I hope you use some of The Old Country sayings Rolf always uses, or you will have made a Merry Andrew of DiabloCorps10!!
8324311
I've been wanting to, but with my companion sorta dropping out of the fandom and my chronic writers block... it gets annoying for me to try and continue. I am in fact in the market for a new cowriter, so if you want to get in on the action I'd be more than happy for you or anyone else to help pitch in
8325046 Oh heck yeah! Just PM me and we can discuss the details.