League of Legends: The Pony Princess Patch

by Wasabi-beans

Luna... PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT!!!!

"Okay, that was loud, ow... anyways, Luna is a... err, shouldn't Luna be standing idle on the screen here? Where is..."

"AAAHHH!!!" squealed a familiar voice quite excitably. The 'camera' panned to the left and everyone could see that Luna had a certain Mouth of the Abyss in her arms and snuggling him like some oversized teddy bear.

"Oh you are just the cutest little monster I have ever seen and snuggled!" exclaimed the Princess, squeezing him even further, causing him to blurt out more disgusting noises, "I am most pleased! You shalt be brought to meet the other Royalty, for you will make a most wonderful mascot for our royal band!"

And the camera followed Luna to meet the others, and, unsurprisingly, had the opposite reaction to Kog' Maw.

"WANT MEAT!" asked Kog' Maw, who was still in Luna's hooves, wiggling his airborne toes.

Cadance tucked herself in a bush, her head hidden but clearly making noises like that of Kog' Maw's.

And in the Institute of War hall, the current Cadance sank further and further into her seat, wishing she wasn't there in Runeterra at all.

In the section where those of the Void sat (except Kassadin naturally), Kog' Maw turned to Malzahar while pointing a tiny claw at the screen, "NIGHT PONY FEED ME WOLF MEAT! THEN PLAY WITH ME!!"

Malzahar chuckled and petted the Mouths's giant head, "Indeed, Kog' Maw, this one here is most intriguing...!"

The screen transitioned to Luna finally standing by, awaiting to show her moves to the camera.

"Right, Luna can be summed up as a melee fighter with strong crowd control and ganking, able to pick off stragglers or engage an entire team.

"Her passive, Innate Lightning, is fueled from her emotional adrenaline and vigor, in which every fifth attack causes her to unleash lightning from her horn, striking up to 3 enemies, focusing on champions, so it works a little bit like a mini Statikk Shiv,"

Two caster minions and, of all Champions, Hecarim, got hit by the lightning to demonstrate the passive.

"The first ability of Luna's is Transmogrification, in which Luna sends out a skill shot lightning bolt that turns one non-allied minion, monster and pet into her pet that she can control for 18 seconds, providing them with an slight armor and attack speed buff as well,"

Luna sends said skill shot out to a siege minion, in which its features became spikier, and shot at Hecarim with a surprisingly aggressive speed.

It took Hecarim more than a few hits to finally kill it, shaking his head in disapproval.

"Oh dear..." commented 'Phreak'.

"This 'Phreak' and even the Centaur did not like the added feature on Transmogrification, sister!" commented Luna to Celestia.

"Well, it is a tad tenacious..." said Celestia.

"I know, it is brilliant! It will put such fear into the enemies' hearts!" Luna happily exclaimed.

"Luna's second ability is called Royal Voice... great, more loud noises... and it's essentially a conic blast where Luna roars so powerfully it knocks back the two closest enemies in front of her. Were they to collide to a wall, they will then become stunned,"

"BE STILL!!" bellowed the onscreen Luna onto a minion and Hecarim, who collided with the wall, resulting in the stun.

"Her third ability is Royal Temper, and it comes with two parts. Its passive increases her health regeneration up to a cap the more she autoattacks and the active component is when Luna may activate Royal Temper to reset her autoattack to land an extra strike, that combines the total damage of hitting three enemies into hitting one enemy, but Innate Lightning's passive will not work until after the cooldown is done,"

And said projection showed exactly that, with Luna roaring, "HRRAAAHH!!" for extra effect. Luna's horn also glowed, and a huge bolt of lighting from the sky impacted right on Hecarim.

"The on-hit effects from this attack is, one: a 20% attack speed buff, and two: a damage steal where Luna enjoys increased attack damage while the enemy has reduced damage as a result, and the bonuses lasts for 10 seconds.

"Luna's Ultimate is Temporary Night, and it actually causes the entire map to be converted into a moonlit night, and it reduces the sight radius pretty much exactly like Nocturne's Paranoia, but lasts 8 seconds long instead,"

"THE NIGHT WILL LAST... TEMPORARILY!"bellowed the princess, and her horn glowed which swiftly turned the bright day into a slightly more illuminated night, but the sight radius is reduced to the same amount.

"Temporarily?" asked Celestia.

"Well, it is an accurate proclamation is it not?" said Luna rather sheepishly.

"In addition," continued the Summoner, "The moonlit Night occurs grants her an increased movement speed buff, and the attack speed bonus from Royal Temper is also activated for the entire duration,"

---

Unbeknownst to the ponies and most of the other Champions, at the very back rows of the Hall, were the imprisoned champions that were held against their will, that were shackled onto their seats by magical runes for security purposes.

There were various reasons for this, such as having no allegiance to a particular group (unlike Kog'Maw and Cho'Gath who were permitted to sit with the other Voidborns), but the main being that these were some of the most unstable and dangerous champions around: Fiddlesticks, Renekton, Shaco, Brand, and of course, Nocturne.

With Celestia, he felt annoyance; another being of the sun, curses!

With Twilight, he felt glee; my, another pure soul to torment!

With Luna, he uttered, "What...?"

It wasn't a loud utterance, but it was the first time any of his fellow champions heard the Eternal Nightmare express genuine shock, including their current jailer, Lee Sin.

"Blind Monk! Is this some runic trickery!? demanded the Nightmare, getting up from his seat, "How is that possible!? How can she have a skill that of MINE!!?"

Lee Sin immediately activated a rune, electrocuting Nocturne.

"Aargh!!" he screamed, and the energy pulled him back tighter onto his seat.

"I don't know Nocturne," he coolly replied, "Now behave yourself,"

And he did: he kept staring at the screen, not with the usual white, slit-shaped eyes, but now with wide, gobsmacked eyes, his mind racing in ways even he himself did not think was possible.

Another one... like me?

---

The screen then showed the words Tips and Strategies, with Luna waiting beside the Dragon. "It is very important to note that Luna is, thankfully, banned from enchanting the Dragon or Baron Nashor, and were she to do so, this happens,"

She shoots the magic bolt at the Dragon, and much to her visible disappointment, simply turned away and haughtily pointed its snout up in the air.

"I did not see why the Summoners wanted to add that impolite gesture!"

"You were proudly riding the Dragon around the battlefield before they filmed us, little sister," answered Celestia, "I think they wanted to teach you a lesson!"

"HMPH!"

"However, the Ancient Golem, Lizard Elder and even the enemies' summoned pets, she has free range on. In the initial stages of the game, Luna is able to make an important choice: use her skills to quickly pick up the buffs, or immediately Transmogrifying one large monster to quickly gank a lane. Luna of course chooses the ganking route,"

Luna shoots the bolt at the Ancient Golem and it then was under Luna's complete control and began to follow her out of the jungle.

"Luna now begins her gank on the enemy Trundle. Whilst The Troll King is busy with Kayle, the Golem moves up the river, a Luna attempts to ambush him from behind, creating an intimidating three-way gank,"

"The Golem appears from the brush and heads onto Trundle, which causes him to panic greatly, and retreat only to run straight onto Luna's well-positioned Royal Voice.

"PILLAR THIS, PEON!!", which knocks him onto the wall, stunning him.

"However, before the trio could go in for the kill, comes pretty much the biggest risk to using a powerful Monster as a gank tool. Hecarim charges in from the south with Onslaught of Shadows, causing the three who flee in a magically induced Fear,"

"NO SISTER I DIDN'T WET THE BED!!" screamed Luna mindlessly.

Whilst Trundle makes his escape, Hecarim focuses on the Ancient Golem, and before Luna could even touch Hecarim, he used his Devastating Charge to flee away, and also Smited the Golem for the valuable Blue Buff to boot.

And to add insult, his obnoxious laugh echoed all the way into the bushes.

'Phreak' didn't speak, simply because the script cued him to hold his peace for the following scene that was recorded in full glory.

"My gank..." weakly muttered Luna, still staring at the brush where Hecarim disappeared to, "My beautifully executed, three way gank... ruined..."

"Princess, we must continue with the match," said Kayle coolly as she continued to push the creeps once again.

"And it was all because of that SIX-LIMBED ABOMINATION!" bellowed Luna with an angry stomp, and she proclaimed towards the bush, "HEAR ME FOUL UNDEAD CENTAUR!! FOR I, THE PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT SHALL RETRIEVE MY BLUE BUFF AND HAVE MY REVENGE!! YOUR HIGH MOBILITY IS NO MATCH FOR MY RAW GANKS!!"

Kayle responded to her proclamation by whacking Luna's head with the flat side of her sword, and then pointed sternly her to the jungle where she belonged.

"Alright! Alright! I will continue jungling!" whined Luna as she scampered back into the jungle, "Stupid centaur..."

Luna sank into her seat, sulking childishly. Celestia could only giggle and ruffle her mane, to which Luna roughly shoved her sister's hoof away.

"Luna's kit only makes her a fantastic duelist as well, thanks to her balance of crowd control and sustained damage," Phreak continued, "Here she is now dueling with Hecarim. Whilst Hecarim's heals is fairly strong, Luna's own health regen passive is keeping up with the centaur's, so... they're just... standing on one spot, smacking each other, with neither one backing down..."

It was amazingly the most intriguing sight so far in this very weird spotlight. Hecarim never stands still. But here he is, angrily hitting Luna, which enraged her, in which she retaliated with thunderous clubs from her hooves, which enraged Hecarim, and the cycle continued, whilst both their heals kept them going like clockwork.

It was such an intense and ridiculous sight that literally champions on both teams just stood around them and watched. Celestia took this opportunity to trot to Trundle, who conjured up a Pillar of Ice to lean on.

"Ahem, excuse me, King Trundle, is it?" asked Celestia.

The Troll King beamed upon hearing his acknowledged title, "The one and only of course!"

"Well, you see, I was rather curious at what we are seeing here," Celestia gestured at the still stubborn equine battle royale, "Is this common?"

"Not with Hecarim it's not!" admitted Trundle,"Gotta' say, I thought you little princesses were some kind of joke, but anyone who can give Hecarim a staredown of a beatdown has got some real brass on them!"

"So, is it also common to step in between two deadlocked champions?" she asked.

"Sure! But that means we're back to fighting, and no offense, but I'm right beside you with a really big club, you best just let them finish it up!'

"Oh, I'm sure I can make some adjustments," beamed Celestia with a pleasant smile.

And without warning, she activated her Ultimate, Solar Glare.

The opposing all shrieked at the sudden Blinding effect, including a Hecarim who trotted back in shock, which gave Luna an opportunity to press her advantage and struck him hard.

"GAH!!" he yelled, the Blind finally wearing off, "Who dares interrupt my duel!? I shall-"

---

What happened next was something no video footage can capture, for it happened in such quick succession that not even Celestia, Luna, or anyone else noticed it.

Hecarim saw her clearly for the first time. A radiant, four-legged dawn personified with the most ethereal of manes and the warmest, sweetest pair of eyes he ever saw.

She looked at him with such warmth and gentleness with the most sincere of smiles, that he felt a hitch in his throat, if he had one.

And best of all, she spoke to him.

"Sorry," her smooth as butter voice whispered into his souls. And in a Flash, she was out of his sights, for she dodged a clubbing from a now very ticked off Troll.

Hecarim thinks he's in love with a pretty pony princess. The big white one, of course.

For the obnoxious blue one just killed him with a bolt of lightning.

---

"With the sudden and surprisingly underhanded Solar Glare, Luna finally finishes off her foe who had no time to react after being Blinded," said Phreak, "And that concludes Luna's Champion Spotlight! Overall, she's a very dangerous ganker with a lot of positional control and raw damage.

"And now we present the final princess...

"Cadance... the Princess of Love!"

The audience sees a zoomed in shot of the nervous Princess in her seat, where beside her, also sat a certain white unicorn with blue hair, equally as nerve-wrecked...

Author's Note:

1. I haven't included any extra skins for the ponies yet as I think it would've broken the flow of the story, but it will be included later on!

2. IMPORTANT NOTE: I have edited Chapter 2 so that Twilight's ult is slightly modified, nerfed even. It will be her only ability where she cannot combo with her other skills, as frankly, it just over-complicates things. Check it out to see what I mean.

3. I have decided to put this on hiatus, as I want to see more appearances from Cadance in season 5 first, because frankly, that girl's a Mary Sue. She just comes off as either a damsel in distress or the perfect plastic pony that it doesn't make for good writing, heck, her HUSBAND has more layers to him than her. Sure, I can make my own interpretation of her but I prefer basing something off of the show. Don't worry though, I am still gonna' write other fics, such as continuing my latest one, Batman's Batmobile.

4. Who else but Luna as a jungler?

5. Yes, using Kayle as a counter for Top champions, evil, I know.

Comments

[PuckDaFolice]

It's not dead! HAHAHAHA
*ahem* good chapter as always :P