• Member Since 30th Sep, 2012
  • offline last seen 6 minutes ago

touileasaso


Just a regular Brony who likes to bake sweets and write stories. Feel free to post criticism, but please don't flame.

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While Manehattan prepares to face a big thunderstorm, Blossomforth must deal with her past fear of lightning to help everyone prevail through the storm. But can she keep her fears in check long enough to protect Manehattan?

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 24 )

"Right. But now imagine this piece of cloud filled with water..." Home went on while Trixie filled the bucket with water from a hose. "...the weight will be very different."

Honey

That's the only fix I could find.

5361141
Thank you. I appreciate you helping me. It seems that no matter how hard I try, there will always be spelling mistakes, huh?:unsuresweetie:

You might want to town down Spike's behavior in the mall. Make's him feel like a jerk.

Okay, I like this. A definite danger, here. Also, good explanation as to why the cloud can't be kicked away. I hope everything turns out alright in the end.

5362239
To be fair, 500 bits for a quill along with a sofa forced along with the merchandise is a bit much, so I'm guessing that Spike's frustration is justified. If not, what would you have me do?

5362850 I guess I was seeing this in a different light. I guess I just wanted the tone just to be pulled back just a tad bit.

Personally, ah'd say it's a good start. Lookin' forward to the rest.

First, a bit of a nitpick. Why is Blossomforth's explanation of her phobia in italics? It's not a flashback. Even Honey's reaction is in italics.

"But I'm a member of the weather team! Not to mention the Bearer of the Element of Loyalty! What will ponies think if they see or hear me chickening out of this!?" Blossomforth exclaimed before frowning. "And no pun intended on the chicken part!"

6364227
Whoops...I guess I don't know what I was thinking there...let me fix that up...

Glacier buddies!

...do I smell a love triangle developing?

I really need to stop posting these things once a year

Yes you do, but none the less you bring in quality work which I severely enjoy to read. Keep on the good work. :twilightsmile:

"Tell me about it. I actually thought that you were going to pounce on me earlier."

Not that I would have minded... If you know what I mean :rainbowwild:

For a refresher, when does this take place in the timeline?

7196466
I guess sometime after Mother Fearest, since Twilight mentions her and Trixie's studies.

If the cloud is made of chaos magic, I'm surprised that it isn't pink cotton candy with chocolate milk rain and whipped cream lightning bolts.

[youtube=65TnEdxl2uo]
(meh... close enough :raritywink: )

7275874
I'd say that it's different from Discord's kind of chaos magic, since he views chaos in another perspective. Whereas this one is pretty destructive, Discord's is more mischievous.

7275894

Says something about Discord, I suppose. :pinkiesmile:

Ooh, those poor flowers. And abnormal? Not good.

Thunderlane is awesome. That is all. :D

Of course, the Manehattenverse CMCs have to have their own version of tree sap. And with the lack of trees outside of the city park, the next best thing is slime. Hypothetically, oil could be viewed as slimy.

She knew that Rainbow Dash would be steaming in jealousy if she had ever found out about this.

"Thunderlane...thanks..." Blossomforth said, a tinge of red on her cheeks.

Thunderlane nodded. "Hey, anytime."

I think "steaming with jealousy" is an understatement.

Looking once again to the barrier, Spike saw that the lightning strikes were aiming for the stained frame of him that Trixie had made. He couldn't help but be a little peeved that his awesome image was being destroyed by the storm. If that storm could think like Auntie suggested, it had a sick sense of humor by attacking the superhero barrier.

Spike just can't catch a break, can he?

"Oh this is just wonderful..." Soarin muttered. "Could this situation possibly be any worse?"

Rainbow Dash would definitely be jealous.

I would've had the speech include another thought...
Soarin: "Of course I do! But I also want to keep you all safe!"
Blossomforth: "But the fewer pegasi that are out there fighting the storm, the less likely you will be able to keep us all safe."

Also, will this story be continued soon?

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