Update 11/24: Cancelled due to lost interest and too similar to other stories.
Timeline: Sometime BEFORE Season One.
What do you do when you just want to get back home, and technically you don't exist?
What do you do when your mind tells you you're surrounded by colored horses?
At the very least, try to keep from going insane. That's the challenge a young human girl faces when she suddenly finds herself cast into the strangest place she's ever been.
Concept: lunabrony
Written By: lunabrony and PL
Chapters (3)
Ooooooh this is looking really good so far :3. Grammar and spelling and all that jazz look good too. And I can't escape the feeling that by the end of this Laura will never return home and will meet Bon-Bon and adapt to being a pony and become Lyra Heartstrings. In fact, now that I think about it, maybe that's why Lyra is so obsessed with humans! She becomes adapted to being a pony and barely remembers being human but remembers that it was awesome or something like that!? Anyways, great story so far, keep up the good work :P.
Great story, you could use some paragraph spacing though, it will really promote the readability of your story. But other than that, I have to say keep up the good work.
I tend to like with stories where teen girls end ponified, lets see how well this one ones...
I guess they didn't tell Celestia about this?
3710527 Getting to that.
"In the middle of her frustration frustration it glowed yellow,"
...
YES I CAN PERCEIVE THOSE THINGS
it is my blessing and my curse
"the throne room of Canterlot Castle,"
the mirror was found in the Crystal Empire
...thus making your entire premise moot
uh uh WELL NO IT WAS IN CANTERLOT AFTER ALL MY BAD
"Her head disappeared and came back with the mypod in her mouth."
3713437 Thanks for the input!
Fixed, no comment, Fixed!
I'm intersted. So please write more^^
3743253 I will eventually. I'm working two jobs and don't have much time to write, and when I do write I'm focused on finishing Six Two Six Two which is almost done, so I might not get another Reflection update in until next week.
But I'm trying!
Since Lyra went to Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns with Twilight (see chapter one) It would be better to set this fic start years before Nightmare Night return. And honest, why wasn't she interrogated by some guards? Why they just let her leave like that? I know ponies are trusting, but this is too much. I feel this chapter could be greatly improved. Also Sunset left YEARS before Twilight became Princess Celestia student.
3756802 There are of course going to be some liberties taken with the timelime, as this is merely a story loosely based on canon events and not meant to completely fit.
The guards let her go because she was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Technically she didn't break any laws, and she was evaluated by the mental hospital before being released
You can bet that Celestia will hear about this, however.
In the meantime, don't think too hard about it, I just hope you like it.
3756820
Your story is way too similar to Heartstrings .The way they treat her, and how she is just moved to Ponyville, it seems you're rushing things way too much. For me it would have worked better if she had stayed in Canterot, found that her unicorn body was young, they tried to sent her back but the mirror rejected her for some reason... stuff like that.
3757218 Never read Heartstrings, I'm very selective about what fanfics I read because I don't want to be influenced by other peoples writing. That just seems inappropriate.
But I do value your feedback, ill try to work in less trusting guards and such.
I like it
They couldn't test the mirror on Lyra really, since it's not until some time later that the mirror is discovered. In the meantime, at least the NMM has to come. It would also seem rushed to have Lyra just inspect the room right away, even though she wouldn't find anything and doesn't even know the mirror is the portal. I think it's a fine idea that Ponyville is the location of a renowned mental hospital. It would explain so much. Maybe the Bon-Bon thing was a bit rushed, but you could always edit the story to put in Lyra's failed attempts to find gainful employment before she encounters the candy pony. Her picking up basic telekinesis so quickly was a bit plot holey, but it makes sense that all she has to do is push in the opposite direction that dampener did. I'm not sure if it's a good idea to immediately bring in the hand metaphor though. It might otherwise make a good "special" magic for her to discover later.
Also don't feel intimidated by "Heartstrings." I enjoy a good written tale lots more than a tumblr blog. The puppet animation is good and all, but it's easier to imagine when it's just words. At the same time you should read it though. It's about Lyra turning into a pony, hooking up with Bon-Bon and then experiencing NMM, and if you don't read it you might accidentally write the exact same story. (Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it!)
3757825
Is not a fanfic, is a comic.
And being influenced? I call horseapples, the more you read the more you know, and the more you know the more you can improve.
3759329
Actually the official story of the mirror is somewhat like this:
Sunset Shimmer escapes using the mirror.
Years later Twilight Sparkle becomes Celestia student.
After Cadance becomes the ruler of the crystal empire, the mirror is somewhat sent there
Sunset Shimmer returns and steals the magical crown (see EQG movie for more details)
For this story to work Sunset would have to been Celestia favorite student, together with Twilight.
3760428 I didn't know any of that. Where did you find the official story at ? O.o
3760428
Oh great Celestia that's that's terrible. You are so right. If the mirror was in the Crystal Empire when Sunset Shimmer rage quit, she wouldn't be able to get it since the entire Crystal Empire had been vanished for "at least 100 years". You just proved that the mirror had to be in Canterlot before the NMM arc, and I'm resoundly wrong!
I still refuse to believe EQG was anything other than a bad dream.
3766283 What's this?! Someone admitting fault?! In comments?! ON THE INTERNET?!
3766114
Comics, watching the movie and logic.
3767779 Oooooh, I haven't gotten my hooves on the Sunset Shimmer comic yet. I've wanted to, but can't find it anywhere!
i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6991206144/h448DA3C6/