Day Fifteen
Pinkie and I have actually been taking things slow since our last date. Our friends were more than curious about how our date went and even melted some when Pinkie showed them the gift I made for her. I got more than a few hoof pats on the back for that little addition. So after that day Pinkie and I officially became special someponies. We do the normal couple stuff. You know, kissing and hugging a lot. Hang out a lot more too.
Honestly I’m loving every minute of it. I can't tell you how much better my life has gotten since I decided to take that plunge all those days ago. Pinkie has been constantly smiling too. Well, that may seem normal to everyone but I can see an extra spark behind it nowadays. Even our friends have been loving the joy we have been sharing together. It is rather infectious.
So yeah, everything has been going great. I will admit that I’ve been planning something to thank all my friends as well as be a little date for Pinkie and I. You see, we’re going to see the Wonderbolts show tomorrow. What the others don't know is that I got Derpy to help me get reservations at a restaurant literally the day after Pinkie and I had our date. So the reservations are set and I hope to make this weekend we share memorable.
Anyways. I probably won't have time to write to you, so I hope you don't feel too lonely. I gotta get some sleep right now. I just thought I would let you know what I plan to do in the coming days.
I set the quill down and get ready for bed. Tomorrow is going to be a big day.
“Wake up, Anon!”
I quickly sit up in shock from my bed.
“Huh, what is is?!” I look around frantically to see that Rainbow is in my room hovering in front of my bed. “What time is it?” I ask groggily.
“It’s time to get up! Today is the day we head to Cloudsdale to see the Wonderbolts!” She screams.
I groan loudly as I throw my blanket over my head and try to sleep again. Then I feel them tear away from my body.
“Rainbow, it’s too early for this.” I look out the window to see that it’s still dark. “I don't even see the sun yet.”
“Come on you, knucklehead! We gotta get ready!” She pleads.
“Come on, Dashie.” I plead as I start to rub the other side of my empty bed. “Come, sleep with me. It’s cold and I’m not going to get up no matter how hard you try.”
I see her roll her eyes. “If I get in that bed you know I won't be able to stay up.” She admits.
I nod happily. “~Rainbow~” I sing to her as I pat the spot. “~You know you want too~”
She lets out a groan. “Fine!”
“Blanket!” I shout.
She rolls her eyes and picks up the blanket as she hovers to the empty side of the bed. I quickly throw the covers over us as I wrap my arms around her and pull her to my chest.
“Like a little teddy bear.” I whisper happily as I slowly start to doze.
“I can't believe I’m enjoying this so much.” She mutters as we both fall into a deep sleep.
“Hey, Anon!”
I slowly crack my eyes open and see a tuft of Rainbow mane. Behind that mane is Pinkie looking at us with a huge grin.
“Hey, Pinks.” I say happily. “You wanna join in with Rainbow and I?”
She smiles at me brightly. “No can do! Twilight told me to wake you so we could meet her at her home.”
“Pinkieeeee.” I whine as I pat the spot behind me... “Come, sleep.”
She giggles at me. “Come on, Anon. You’ve already got your rest. I’m sure Dashie has too.”
I let out a sigh. “I guess you’re right, Pinkie.” I sit up as I poke Rainbow some. “Come on, Dash. Time to get up.”
“Five more minutes.” She slurs.
“Nope, let’s go. Pinkie’s orders.” I say as I get out of bed in just my boxers.
“Alright.” She relents rolling off the side with a soft ‘thunk’.
I let out a yawn as I stretch in place. I look down to see Pinkie looking at me with a blush.
“See something you like?” I tease.
“~Maybe.~” She says playfully.
I just chuckle some. “I’ma hit the shower. Pinkie, can you be my beautiful, amazing marefriend and pack me some clothes for the trip?”
She nods. “Okie dokie loki!”
“No fair!” Rainbow says. “You can't have Pinkie pack for you!”
“Why not?” I ask.
“She will be done in like two seconds! I still have to fly home and get packed thanks to you!” She says angrily.
I shrug. “Sounds like a personal problem, Dash. One of the benefits of having an awesome marefriend.” I say with a shit eating grin.
I see her fur stand on end at the insult. “You are so lucky that you gave me this ticket, buddy.” She says hotly before she zips out my window at full speed.
I chuckle again as I look down to Pinkie. “You’ll always be awesome, Pinkie, whether you pack my stuff or not.”
She smiles back. “Don't you forget it.”
I clap my hands together. “Alright. Shower, shave, clothing and then let’s shove off.”
She gives a final nod as I enter my bathroom.
“Alright, so is everypony ready?” Twilight asks.
“Everyone is.” I say playfully.
Twilight rolls her eyes. “’m going to be casting a longer version of the cloud walking spell. Seeing as the Wonderbolts show is on sunday. I thought it would be great if we all took the weekend off and had some fun!” She says excitedly.
We all nod at that. It’s true that we are leaving early so we can enjoy everything Cloudsdale has to offer.
“So how long is this spell going to last?” I ask.
“Very good question!” She smiles brightly. “It will last four days. That means we should have a day to spare on the spell. I don't want any accidents, so I wanted to make sure our time was going to cover the entire stay.”
“Awesome.” I say aloud.
“Just hold still and let me cast this. Rainbow, Fluttershy. Can you two pack the balloon for us while I cast the spell?”
“Sure, Twi.” Rainbow says. “Come on, Flutters.”
They both head out as Twilight casts her spell on each of us. Having a spell cast on you is rather odd at first. The only way I could explain it is like having water flowing over your entire body. You feel it, you can touch it, but you can't grab it. It has no temperature to it. It’s simply just there. Pretty freaky at first, but you get use to it. Twilight is fast though and we are all outside and gathering into the balloon.
Twilight also took the time to cast a spell on the basket to give us all some lounging room, seeing as the flight would take some time. Even with Rainbow pulling us. So we all get comfy and just chat the entire way there. Pinkie is leaning up against my body as I wrap an arm around her. Honestly, this has just become second nature to us.
“I don't know how many times I can say this, but you two are simply adorable!” Rarity coo’s as she looks to Pinkie and I.
“I think this makes it about 37 times.” Twilight states.
“You’ve been keeping count?” Applejack asks.
She nods. “Yes.”
“Well no matter.” Rarity says throwing her curl back. “It’s true. I still can't believe you two finally admitted your feelings.” She gets a far off look as she lets out a happy sigh.
“I’m definitely happy about it as well.” I give a confident nod.
“Yeah, yeah. Best friends in love, lots of mushy stuff. Yada, yada.” Rainbow rolls her eyes.
“Seems like somepony is jealous.” Rarity quips.
“I am not jealous.” Rainbow deadpans.
“I don't know, it sounds like denial to me.” Applejack pitches in with a smirk.
“It would’ve never worked out.” I say aloud catching everyone’s attention. I shrug. “She only wants me for my body.”
I look at her with a smug grin as she is burning red from that.
“I'm going to take a quick fly.” She says quickly as she hops out the basket.
“That was mean.” Pinkie pokes me in the side.
I shrug again. “She knows I'm just kidding around.”
“Still...”
I pat Pinkie on the head gently. “Don't worry, Pinkie. I’ll make it up to her. I always do.”
She nods at that. “Very true.”
Twilight then speaks up. “Get ready, we should be arriving at Cloudsdale in a few minutes.”
We all give a nod. I honestly couldn't wait to see this place. I have only heard about it from the girls.
Wow. Honestly, what else is there to say? This place is literally a city in the sky. A city made out of clouds I might add. It’s so simple and yet holds a beauty the likes I will never see again. Like seeing Canterlot for the first time, this is one of the wonders in this world. Slowly we make our approach and my jaw is still on the floor.
I feel a hoof close my mouth. “Keep it open for too long and you’ll catch flies.” AJ says with a chuckle.
“Amazing isn't it.” Rarity chips in.
I nod dumbly. “Yeah. I can't even find the words to express what I’m feeling right now.”
“Yeah, we felt the same way when we saw this place too, Anon.” Twilight says.
We all brace ourselves as the balloon makes its touchdown onto the soft material. I look over the edge at the cloud below as it shifts around in place.
“So you’re sure that this spell will work?” I ask aloud as I now come to terms with what we are about to do.
“Positive.” Twilight answers with confidence.
“Are you really su-”
I feel something push me over the edge as I yell my entire way down. Thankfully, that entire way is only a foot or two, as I face plant into the soft pillow like substance. I roll onto my back panting heavily as I see Rainbow flying above me, laughing loudly.
“Rainbow!” The girls call angrily at her antics.
“Come on, you have to admit that was funny!” She says between fits of laughter.
Once I stabilize and get to my feet, do I give a few test jumps to test the spell. It’s kinda like walking on a bed. Slightly springy with some give as well.
“Seems to work.” I say as I look to the other ponies as they hop out.
Now that we have all gotten out do we take the time to look at our surroundings. The place is filled with pegasi, for obvious reasons. They just went about their day like any other pony. Though most of them were flying. Twilight gathers our group together.
“Alright everypony.” She pulls out a map. “We will first head over to the hotel. I made reservations, but I want to make sure everypony knows where it is. From there we can kinda do our own thing. I know we all are excited, but remember that we’re guests here. So no getting into trouble.”
We all nod as we follow Twilight to wherever this hotel is. One thing we notice though while walking is that all the ponies are looking at me. Some with shock, fear and even disgust. I honestly could feel my spirits fall some. It was like being in ponyville on my arrival again.
“It’s alright, Anon.” I look down to see Fluttershy gently nuzzle my hand.
I nod hesitantly as I feel more uncomfortable from all the looks.
“I guess I should’ve realised that you are still largely an unknown species, Anon.” Twilight looks to all the ponies in the same uncomfortable manner.
“It’s fine, Twilight. Let’s just hurry to the hotel.”
That gets everyone to agree as we pick up our pace.
The hotel is rather fancy, I must admit. When we walked in I could hear classical music playing, setting the atmosphere rather nicely. Many ponies walked around in different manner of fancy clothing. It was like being in Canterlot, but with pegasi. As we walk up to the counter, Twilight smiles brightly at the clerk.
“Hello, my name is Twilight Sparkle. I have reservations for seven rooms?”
The clerk looks at her and then to her books. In a snobbish tone she reads off. “Yes, I see a reservation for a Sparkle.” She then looks up and to me. “Sorry, but no pets allowed.”
That gets a slight gasp from everyone as they all narrow their eyes at her. Even I felt insulted by how she just simply said that.
“He isn't a pet.” Twilight informers her with an irritated tone.
The clerk shakes her head. “Sorry, but we cannot board this creature here.”
Rainbow flies up and gets in her face. “What’s your problem lady?!”
“The problem isn't with me. Rules are rules.” She states not even fazed with Rainbow practically nose to nose with her...
I can see everyone practically grinding their teeth together at this mare.
“I don't like to pull this card, but I’m Twilight Sparkle. Student of Princess Celestia.” Twilight comes in with a more commanding tone.
The clerk quirks a brow. “Is that so?”
Twilight nods. “I think many ponies would be interested to know that you turned down not only the student of the ruler of this country, but also the Elements of Harmony.” She gives a wave to her friends.
The mare is now sweating bullets. “Fine.” She lets out a huff on air. “But we cannot allow it to be alone in its own room.”
Twilight is about to protest, but I quickly speak up. “Twilight, It’s fine. Pinkie and I can share.”
Twilight sighs in frustration as she gives the clerk a nod. We get our keys quickly and make our way to an elevator, but not before all the girls give the mare a hard glare.
“The nerve of that mare!” Twilight screams slightly as the elevator doors close.
“To think Anon would be treated so poorly!” Rarity comes in.
“You should let me kick her flank!” Rainbow adds.
“I’m not one for violence, but I agree with Rainbow. That mare crossed a line!”
“Girls, it’s alright.” I try to calm them.
“It’s not alright!” Pinkie comes in next. “That meanie thought you were an animal!”
I let out a sigh. “So did the ponies in Ponyville.”
That got them all to look to the ground ashamed.
“It ain't right though. I know we were hard headed, but that still don't make it right.” Applejack adds.
I nod. “Yeah. I know.”
The elevator finally gets to the top floor as we exit it and find our rooms. Twilight hands us our keys and we all quickly get settled into our own rooms. Pinkie and I practically throw our stuff to the floor as I walk over and fall onto the bed.
“I have a feeling this will be a normal thing.” I admit to myself.
Pinkie soon comes to my side and gently rubs me thigh.
“Don't worry, Anon. I’ll be there with you.”
“You’re alright with us sharing a room, right?” I ask hoping to not intrude.
She giggles some at that. “You shouldn't even have to ask, Anon.”
I smile back at her. “You’re right.” I then look back to the open door to our room and see the girls meeting back up. “Lets see what Twilight has planned.”
Pinkie gives a nod as we enter the hall.
“Now we know where this place is and have our keys. So what is everypony going to be doing?”
Rainbow looks over at me. “Hey, Anon. Wanna see how the weather is made?”
I actually like that idea. “Sure.” I then look to Pinkie. “How about you, Pinks?”
She smiles at me and gives a nod.
“Well, I heard about a grand library here in Cloudsdale.” Twilight says with a small twinkle in her eye.
“I heard there’s an apple farm up here.” Applejack gives a whistle. “That is somethin I gotta see.”
“I was going to head over to the zoo. I haven't been there since I was a filly.” Fluttershy all but whispers.
“There is a small fashion show going on that I wouldn't want to miss!” Rarity adds with excitement.
“Good, so we all have something to do. Meet back here for dinner in say, seven hours?” Twilight asks.
We all give a nod.
“Alright then. See you ponies later!”
Everyone splits off as Rainbow looks to Pinkie and me with a grin.
“Alright! Anon, you’re gonna love the weather factory.”
“I can't wait.” I say enthusiastically.
The entire walk to the weather factory was about the same as the walk to the hotel. Everypony around was just giving us looks that ranged from anger, hate and fear. I tried to just put it out of my mind, but it was slowly bringing back memories of my time in Ponyville when I first arrived. All the looks and whispers. Rainbow and Pinkie were trying their best to distract me, but it wasn't working well.
“Here’s the factory.” Rainbow says with pride.
“Wow.” I say as I look it over.
She waves us to follow. “Come on and let me show you how the weather works.”
Pinkie and I follow Rainbow as she approaches a counter.
“Rainbow Dash, good to see you again!” I hear a masculine tone call out.
“How’s the factory holding up, Spinner?” Rainbow asks.
“Good as always. Here to give another tour?”
She nods happily. “Yeah. My friends Pinkie and Anon.” She points to us.
“Whoa!” He jumps up slightly when he see’s me. “Well won'tcha look at that!” He gives a hearty laugh. “I thought that griffon friend of yours was unique, but this Rainbow, takes the cake.” He walks up to me with a large smile. “Well ain't you a big one?” He looks me up and down. “What’s your name slim?”
I am thrown off by his straight forward friendly manner. What stands before me with a genuine smile is a rather tall stallion. I would have to say he is probably a head taller than Mr.Cake. Though what he has over Mr.Cake is a fantastic build. I can clearly see his muscles under his uniform. His fur is a deep blue, while his mane is golden blond. Both his mane and tail have a short crop cut to them, kinda like Big Mac’s. I can't really see his cutie mark though, thanks to the white lab coat he wore.
“I told you his name!” Rainbow chuckles some.
“Well it’s only polite to give it to him myself.” I say to Rainbow as I look down. “My names Anon.”
He throws his hoof out to shake as I give it a firm grasp and shake it a few times.
“Well my names Cloud Spinner, but everyone around here just calls me Spinner.” He then looks at Pinkie. “You’re uh... Pinkie right?”
“Yup!”
He smiles. “I remember you from last time.” He then looks over to Rainbow. “Alright, let’s get them in safety gear and then you can show them around. You know the usual.”
Rainbow gives a nod. “Thanks, Spinner.”
We follow Rainbow as she takes us to a side room to get gear for our protection. Helmets, eye goggles and things like that. Some of the things were either too big or too small for me, but I made them fit well enough. Rainbow showed us out and was slowly giving us a tour. Making sure to explain everything she knew about each process.
“That Spinner guy seemed really friendly.” I admit while Rainbow had just finished her talk on rainclouds. “I also notice he said everyone and not everypony.” That is very noticeable, believe it or not, when a pony says it.
“Yeah, Spinner has been all over Equestria. He has seen, met and even dated outside his species. Ever since I met him he has always said everyone.” Rainbow nods.
“Really? I assume it’s not really common?” She looks to me with a raise brow. “The dating thing I mean.” I correct.
Another nod. “Yeah. You hear stories, but rarely see it.”
“Good to know at least someone here is friendly.” I look around and catch looks from inside the factory.
Rainbow gives all the ponies looking a glare. “Yeah.”
I decide to distract myself. I point over to what looks like a rainbow waterfall.
“That kinda looks like the one at your place.”
Rainbow smiles at that as she waves us over. “This is where the rainbows collect till we need them.”
“You know, I always wondered what this stuff tastes like. Yours was too high for me to reach.”
“Give it a try.” Rainbow points to the small pool.
I shrug as I walk over to it. I thought I heard Pinkie try to call out to me, but I ignore it as I dip a finger in and pull it out. I look at the liquid rainbow once more before I put my finger in my mouth. I quickly pull it out as I start to gag. This stuff is insanely hot!
“Oh my gosh, I can't believe you did it!” I hear Rainbow cracking up from behind me.
“Why didn't you tell me it was hot!” I say after the burn goes away.
“It was pretty funny.” Rainbow then elbows Pinkie. “Pinkie did the same thing on her first tour here.”
“Really?” Pinkie nods. “So I guess it was spicy for you as well?” She nods again. I let out a sigh. “Well that was rather disappointing. Was kinda hoping it would taste like Skittles.”
“Like me?” Rainbow looks confused.
I roll my eyes. “I told you before, Rainbow. Skittles are candy where I’m from.”
She chuckles nervously at that. “Heh. Oh yeah.” She shakes her head some. “Well that’s it for the tour. Let’s go drop this stuff off and then maybe we can walk around town some?”
Pinkie and I agree as we follow Rainbow to the changing room.
Rainbow, Pinkie and I have been walking around the shopping district some. Just browsing the wares and trying our best to ignore all the looks. Honestly, this was suppose to be a bit of a vacation. Now it seems that it was becoming anything but what I wanted. I just let out a sigh as I look through a small window and spot a few interesting things. All of it looked rather expensive, but pretty nonetheless.
I started to notice voices coming from behind me. When I turn around I notice a few pegasi guards talking to Rainbow and Pinkie. I was curious, so I walk towards them.
“-old you that he isn't dangerous!” I hear Rainbow yell as I get closer to hear them talking..
“Please calm down, ma’am. We’re just checking up on some reports we have been getting.” The guards answers.
“Well I think you should listen to what I’m saying, pal!” Rainbow pokes the guards armor. “That “creature” is my friend and he is not going to hurt anypony!”
“We can't just have random monsters walking around this town ma’am.” Another guard comes in.
“He isn’t a monster!” Pinkie shouts.
“I’m going to have to ask you two to calm down.” A guard takes a step in trying to show authority.
“Problem?” I ask from behind them.
“No need to worry cite-” When they turn around they all freeze in place. “I-I... We were talking to your h-handlers.”
I look over to see Rainbow’s nostrils and wings are flared. Pinkie’s eyes just go wide at that. Both are filling with different emotions.
“What did you just say to him!?” Rainbow screams.
Rainbow looks like she is about to pounce. The guards, realizing their situation, decide to back off.
“J-Just make sure your pet doesn't cause any damage.” One guard says before they all turn to leave.
“I-Y-Y... ARG!” Rainbow screams as she punches the cloud street in anger.
Rainbow is panting heavily as she just looks to the ground and Pinkie has been stuck in shock. Her eyes are wide and her mouth is moving up and down slightly as if she is trying to say something. I will admit that I wanted to be angry, I wanted to yell and get mad. But I know that I have to remain calm right now. If not for myself, then for my marefriend and brofriend.
“Maybe we should just go back to the hotel?” I offer. They both don't even acknowledge my words. “I’m feeling kinda tired.” I chuckle lamely.
They still don't respond, so I slowly herd them close and show them back to the hotel. Once we get to Pinkie’s room, I close the door behind me with a silent sigh. Rainbow and Pinkie were like zombies for the entire walk here. Rainbow never looked up from the ground and Pinkie continued her thousands yard stare. I’m starting to get worried.
“I-I can't believe what he said.” Pinkie says to herself. “I can't believe how mean these ponies are.”
I walk over to Pinkie and take a knee. “Pinkie, It’s alright.”
She locks her eyes with mine as a pure anger is held strong behind them.
“No, Anon... T-this isn't right! Y-You are the nicest, sweetest, most gentlest being I ever met! You’re not an animal or any of those bad things!” Pinkie eyes start to glisten some. “T-They’re treating you like a monster, like you’re dirt! They, they thought you were our pet! M-My coltfriend!”
I wrap my arms around Pinkie as she buries her head into my chest and cries aloud. I really have nothing to say to comfort her at this moment. Everything she said was true and it hurt me to hear it. I cast a glance over at Rainbow and see small droplets of liquid falling to the floor. I reach over and pull her close as well, letting her to cry onto my shoulder.
“I’m so sorry, Anon... T-This was suppose to be a vacation, someplace we could all relax... I-I never knew it would be so horrible!” Rainbow admits.
“Shhh...” I try to calm them with my voice. “Don't worry. We’re not going to let some bad stuff ruin our stay here right?”
They both don't answer me as I continue to hold them close. I let out a sad sigh as I look out the window.
Day one down, two more to go. I think sadly to myself.
Stats
Page generated in 0.025 seconds
Total duration
913 users online
1,474,317 hits today, 2,814,898 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
A few capitalization mistakes, a few punctuation errors here and there...other than that, fun chapter!
I anticipate the part where Anon's natural magic resistance kicks in and the cloud walking spell wears off prematurely. Death-defying hijinks ensue.
God, I need more. But I'm torn, I need more of this, but I also need forgotten to update. Why do you do this to me!
Although, given all the "All are equal in Equestria" stories, it's kinda nice to see ponies acting like the prey creatures they originally were, xenophobic and scared.
well, he's a lot more controlled then I would have been.
3858275 Sorry for the errors that still plague this chapter I'll have to reread this again in order to fix it up more. But thanks for bringing to attention that there are indeed things to fix.
Aww, man
Bloody feels are jerkin' the tears out o' me
Sure, I've seen this kinda thing before but never on this heart-wrenchin' level
I commend you, mate and I wait with contentment for the next chapter.
Hakuna Matata
Celestia would be more than disappointment I see a sad report to hear coming up. I can see her being more than ashamed of her little ponies for treating something new with such disrespect I can even imagine she coming to Anon to apologies herself
This might seem weird, but I really like it when people make humans less than "OH MY GOSH, NEW FRIEND FOR ALL". It has been established that ponies aren't exactly the most... accepting of creatures, after all.
Pegasus master race, no humans allowed
Love this story... it also updates quickly
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw10582-Celestia_is_disappointed.png
Wow, talk about xenophoia here.
Silly racist ponies. My people used to eat your people.
Ow. My feels. All of em! Loved the sleeping thing with Rainbow. So adorable!
my*
Also, present-tense isn't the greatest way to write a story. You should stick to past-tense, it makes more sense for the reader
There should be a comma after marefriend
Before anything else, I just want to say that I've been really loving this story. It is way too hard to find Pinkie ship fics (even harder to find decent ones), so to find one that kept mostly everyone in-character (the background ponies seem way too harsh in Ponyville, but not too bad, and the main characters are acting incredibly in-character) while being well written and enjoyable to read all at once was a freaking dream come true!
But, then I read this chapter.
You know what I hate, pretty much more than anything else in a story? When the story blatantly forces one or more characters/groups to act in a way that makes no freaking sense all to create false drama. The over-the-top hate being thrown his way was annoying when it was shown in Ponyville, but not to the point of breaking SoD (close, but not enough). This chapter? The hate here was so over-the-top, so contrived, so fake that it took every last bit of my SoD, tore it up, and proceeded to shoot it into the sun. When you start demonizing something for no other reason than to create false drama because you can't be bothered to come up with a reasonable way to make it happen, then you don't make the reader feel anger toward the group being turned into one-dimensional card board cutouts; no, instead you end up crossing a line to the point where all of that anger is instead directed at the terrible plot hole being forced in.
I really hate leaving this comment, since like I said I've been really enjoying this so far. Even with all this being said, I'll still keep reading, but I find a lot of my enjoyment being washed away from the ridiculously, over-the-top, and contrived hate being thrown at the main character. It completely takes me out of the story, because the fact that everything else seems so similar to canon just makes it that much more obvious as to how out of place it is. There's not even a reason for it to happen. It feels like the only reason it's going on is to have needless drama.
4700847 i guess the anger here was really a bit to much, and it was somehow typical, i can´t believe that he woul be so weird, that they can´t do anything else than to hate him.
I suppose not all of them have seen every race in their world, or maybe not even heard about them, somehow i think the hate for him in this chapter is something, they would probably never do to any other being in Equestria.
I don´t know if i got it right, and i don´t know if i make sense right now, but i now that i agree with you there.
However, in some way this chapter was sweet, i think i loved the end of it the most.
Anon or one of the six (Rarity or Apple Jack) should have pulled a CMDR. Shepard at the hotel:
[youtube=GF4RGk4APmw]
Replace "poor" with "race".
EDIT: Updated the embed because of the site changes between 2015 and 2021
Weather factory out takes:
Scene 1:
Hey Anon, want to go to the weather factory and see how the weather is made? I'll even show you the machine where I stuff kids into to make rainbows!
RD:
AN: Sure, that sound like it wi- Wait, what did you say about kids and rainbows?!
RD: Yeah, we grind kids, that fail a standardized flight test, in a machine that makes rainbows from their ground bodies.
AN: .....Are you a pony Nazi?
PP: Sweet Celestia! That's horrible!....I ate some rainbow the last time we were here.
Scene 2:
AN: Hmm. Rainbows taste kinda meaty with a hint of blood.
RD: Oh, you must be tasting the kids that we grind up in the machine.
Scene 3:
*Rainbow Dash turns to the weather factory workers*
RD: (shouting) Aw come on guys! I know you guys can do a better job of cleaning the machine! I'm finding fur, feathers, and hair from that disappointing filly from my home town that I ground two months ago.
Scene 4:
RD: *holding a jar of rainbow* This jar of liquid rainbow is mostly Scootaloo!!
The weather factory joke was begging to be done.
6192513
Imagine if this chapter had been written now.
Hey Annon, wanna see the new snow machine they installed after I blew up the last one?
Anon:
Sure, sounds n- wait, what?
Also I notice people complaining about the xenophobia here. ...Unfortunately a strong case can be made fot it, especially in the more isolated parts of Equestria. In Ponyville, they freaked out about a zebra, something barely removed from a pony, and Dash felt the need to explain Gilda to Pinkie, as if it wasn't uncommon for ponies not to know what a giffon is. Add the whole ponyisms thing, and Equestria does seem a tad xenophobic at first glance.
Now go to a place only normally accessible to pegasai, aka, essentially even more isolated than Ponyville and all that could be magnified.