mithrilcomb
Joined 12th Mar, 2012 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Overmare · 21k words · 83 35 · 12k views
- headless_rainbow · 1.4k words · 176 163 · 9.6k views
- The Dazzlings Adagio 1 · 6.4k words · 66 29 · 4.7k views
- Omlliw · 1.6k words · 57 26 · 3.1k views
- Rated-R · 1.9k words · 68 45 · 4.7k views
- The Mystery Fluttershy Fan · 4.1k words · 77 74 · 4.3k views
- RapeTrain-Express · 3.3k words · 103 65 · 5.7k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.148 seconds
Total duration
617 users online
948,426 hits today, 2,561,572 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
My first fanfiction so please give constructive criticism, I have no idea what I'm doing
Well I saw alot of little grammatical mistakes, but this can be fixed just by doing a quick once over. Also some spacing between your dialogue would be great. Other than that... POOR TRIXIE!
I just wanna say.
Its not OKEY, its Okay, or better Ok. Good piece, though the transitioning in sentences seems almost repetitive (At least to me) and lots of grammar and punctuation errors. Besides that, I am so going to pony hell for almost liking the idea of this scenario.
That's what she gets for attacking my favorite character!
The grammatical errors were painful, though.
Summary:
But then revenge came 
Trixie tries to rape twilight.
Rainbow dash saves Twilight.
They both get cocks.
They rape trixie.
Trixie is thrown into prison and anyone is allowed to do her.
I think this is good revenge. Poor Twilight at that start
FUCK YES.
Should have usede that Jagged dildo on her ass when they were DP'ing her.
sequel? maybe big mac gets a chance
Good job, I love seeing worst pony get raped.
This story brought to you by Discord.
Seriously, did you type this with your feet? We don't need poorly written rape fics (I would prefer none, but what can I do?).
noone does that to trixie
Bad fic. Change names and nothing different . OOC in it's worst.
poor trixie -breaks her out of the castle- BE FREE TRIXIE
dafuq did I just read?
May i use the part before RD says "Hey Twi"?
600751
Use for what?
617974 Trixie's Punishment, featuring the Musikkorps der Bundeswehr
618056
east-germany ponies? :V
639626 Nope, German humans.
643083
Well I'm not really gonna stop you from anything,although I'm not sure what it is.
651018 Never mind.
317129 after reading that I've decided to agree with Celestia's ruling. also Love the Trixabuse.
Well, from reading the summary. It seems like you do fall into the "only males can rape" trope. Which imo is a bit boring but, not sure how many other tropes you've used in this so :P But could be something to take some pondering into it. (As tbh, the whole "we should rape x, oh darn, we don't have dicks... *inexplicable obtains some* yay! Now we can do the deed!" gimmick is getting a bit worn out. (My apologies if you didn't use it ^^') Also: Not saying something would automatically be bad if it used it. As a lot of bland stuff today are the most liked ;P
In a fairly narrow feedback on regard to not having read it, I could recommend the most basic most futa writers mess up: Keep in mind it's supposed to be "best of both worlds". Just having a futa act like male and basically supplement a male to ex: make it "less gay" or something is a common mistake I see done. Leaving way for the "guy with tits" archetype. Which is basically when a futa is used identically to how a generic porn male is used :P In the stale roles of "male=selfish+sex drive" and "female=cumdump+no needs".
So in case you actually didn't solely focus on and glorify the penises: Then kudos on that. But if you did: Could be something to keep in mind ;3 I've done an example fic basically about just that, (granted, a full counterpart would technically have biological male with a little "extra", but eh xP) on how silly it is to give something both sets of genitals, yet only ever use one, along with how quickly a character latched onto using their non-normal (and exclusively that) genital.
Trailing off a bit aside, hope that made sense heh. Oh, and one last thing: In case you use a specific ex: human/equine anatomy for the genitals. Be sure that you match them with each other. Overall a good tip is to always reverse the roles/acts/anatomy or the like of the fic, then see if you'd still like it. If not, then it might be a good idea to look over the content a bit :P Debunked that in a test too. That some fics are solely "ok/accepted" due to following a trope/norm. And if ex: swapped roles or genders, people would find them utterly terrible. And imo at least, a fic/story that is good on it's own merits beats one that has to rely on stereotypes :3
Grammatically, this was a mess. However, it was really freaking hot and I came. Thumbs up!
Heh heh. Molestia.
I'm not really a fan of rape stories, but I'll give you credit, this was actually enjoyable, especially how those two sexy ponies pounded her. Nicely done. I'll give you a thumbs up for it.
It was well written for most of the stuff I've seen on the site with few spelling. I didn't really like it though just because as a girl the thought of going in all dry is
plus I prefer it when their body's like but their minds don't. But that is just my preference, and it is still a good story