Guardian Angels: Prologue

by Scattershot

The Beginning

Guardian Angels
Chapter 1
The Beginning

Sam slowly came to consciousness, rolling over in bed without opening his eyes. This bunk is extremely comfy. He thought sleepily. I wonder why Jake doesn’t use it… The thought of his friend, whose house he had slept over at, began waking him further. As vague memories of their exploits the previous day floated past his mind’s eye he was forced to leave the embrace of sleep. He cracked open one eye only to snap it back shut. Damnation it is bright! He thought. How long did I sleep? The sun is so high in the sky… wait, sun? His eyes nearly popped out of their sockets they opened so fast, after all he shouldn’t be able to see the sun; Jake’s room was on the ground floor. Looking left and right only yielded unending blue. Sam shot upright in bed and leaned over the edge, expecting to see the lower bunk of his friend’s bed, but was greeted with a very different and infinitely more terrifying sight.

“Shit! JAKE! We have an issue!!! A pretty fucking serious issue!” Sam looked around wildly for his friend, eventually spotting a still form on the other end of the cloud he had thought was a bed. Clambering over to his friend, he unceremoniously bonked him on the head with his fist. “Wakey wakey! You’re the plane freak, GET US DOWN!”

Jake, awoken by the physical abuse and screaming, gave his friend the best death glare he could muster. “The Hell is wrong with you? Do you have any idea what time it is?!”

“Judging by the sun I’d say high noon, really freaking high!”

“What on earth are you yammering about?” Jake looked over the edge of his “bed”, exasperated. “There’s nothing wro- oh dear.” His eyes widened to saucer range as he took in the ground, several thousand feet below them. “Oh god…”

“Yeah, ‘Oh god!’” Sam said, still freaking out, “get us down!”

“How? I don’t even know how we got UP; let alone how we are staying UP!”

Sam attempted to grab Jake’s shoulders and shake him, but only succeeded in bashing him. “And why can’t I grab you? What happened to my hands?” Only now, Sam got a good look at his hands, which had become what looked scarily like hooves. “Oh what in the Hell…” He whispered. Now that the panic was settling down, he got a good look at his friend. “Uh, Jake?”

“What?”

“You’re…a pony.” Sam looked down “and by the look of it, so am I” He looked back toward his new flank “I have a Cutie Mark. Jake, I have a Cutie Mark, we are My Little Ponies”

Jake, his face locked into a mask of denial, shook his head. “No, no we aren’t.”

“I seriously think we are”

“No we aren’t, this isn’t happening, no way no sir.” The more he talked the faster his head shook, his voice rising in anger. “Either you’re dreaming, or I’m having a nightmare. Because there is no way that we have become My Little FREAKING Ponies!”

During the rant, Sam examined his new body. “We appear to be Pegasi, which would explain the cloud.” He gave his wings an experimental flap, still ignoring Jake’s stream of increasingly loud and profane denial. “Hmmm, I wonder.” He turned so his side was facing Jake and lashed out with a wing, effectively punching his friend in the stomach.

“No no FU- PWOAH.” Tirade cut short, Jake doubled over and folded his forelegs over his gut. “The Hell was that for?!”

“For one, to shut you up, and two to test how much control I have of these things.”

“So you hit me?”

“Which is standard for us, yes.” Sam gave his wings another flex “Do you think we can make it to ground level?”

Jake took another peak over the dizzying drop. “Still hoping this is a nightmare, but just to test it, you go first.”

“Me?! You’re the plane freak! You go!”

“And you’re the brony, AND your favorite of the six is a pegasus! I think you are the most qualified. Plus if you die, I’ll know to stay up here and laugh.”

“Bah! Fine, I’ll go! We are gonna need to get down anyway, cause dream or not being stuck in an isolated place with you is scary.” Sam peaked over the edge and took a deep breath. “Okay, here we go…”

He crouched down and made to jump when a voice came from behind them. “Who are you two? I didn’t expect to see anypony up here.”

Sam froze. “That voice…” He turned slowly and what he saw made his jaw hit the cloud. There, hovering at the other end of the cloud occupied by the two, was Rainbow Dash.

“Well that is terribly convenient, someone who knows what they are doing!” Jake set out at a trot towards Dash. “After all, until sanity re-asserts itself we may as well have a guide.” Sam elected to remain behind, his expression tense as he mentally chanted at himself to not fanboy.

Rainbow Dash chuckled nervously. Apparently this pony thought he’d gone crazy. Dash wasn’t sure if him knowing that worried her more or less. “You two having trouble? This cloud really isn’t all that high, it’s a simple glide.”

“Well maybe for you, but we are kinda new to this!” Jake looked over his shoulder at Sam. “Are you coming or what?”

Okay Samuel, you can do this. Approach calmly, don’t freak out, this is probably all a dream anyway… Sam kept up this internal monologue for about three steps before he broke. Showing surprising mastery of his wings, Sam took off at an incredible pace towards Dash, his arms outstretched to hug the multi-chromatic pony.

His mad dash was stopped short as Jake stuck out a leg, clothes-lining him. “Oh no you don’t! There will be plenty of time to traumatize the fictional characters when we are on the ground.” Sam plopped onto the cloud, clutching his throat as best he could with his hooves and gasping for breath.

Rainbow, now thoroughly weirded out, backed off a bit from the cloud. “You guys aren’t quite…right… are you?”

“Not at all really, now can you help us get down?” Jake said, shrugging easily.

Once Sam had stopped gasping and had given Jake a wing cuff to the head for revenge, Dash gave a crash course in gliding and the three soon found them just outside Ponyville. “Still convinced this is a delusion?” Sam asked as they entered town.

“Oh absolutely,” Jake responded without missing a beat. “otherwise I would have started destroying everything in a several mile wide radius, starting with you.”

I need to get these two to Twilight’s before they kill each other, or me. Dash thought in a mild panic. Out loud, she said “Follow me, I know somepony who should be able to help you guys.” Flying a few feet in the air, Rainbow Dash took off towards Twilight’s library. Along the way, the two continued to idly chat and make mortal threats towards one another and those around them. Dash discreetly examined the two stallions as she flew. The one who seemed to think he had gone crazy was colored a silvery blue with strange cloud patterns on his feathers and a dark blue mane. The one who had tried to tackle her was a solid lime green with a jet black mane and tail and startlingly red eyes.
Both of them had strange Cutie Marks, the deluded one’s was a Mobius strip with a weird winged creature flying through it and the words “Mobius-118” written in a ribbon under the symbol. The overenthusiastic green one’s was a large red circle with a line through it at each of the cardinal compass points and a red dot in the exact center. If the constant pummeling the two gave each other didn’t tip anypony off, the Cutie Marks had an almost violent feel to them. These two could cause a very serious problem if Twilight couldn’t do something.

Several minutes and seemingly random topics of discussion later, the three arrived at a large hollowed out tree. Dash knocked and was thankful when Twilight Sparkle opened the door; she didn’t need the impressionable Spike being around these two. “Hey Rainbow, who are your friends?” Twilight asked as she spotted the two newcomers.

“Well they aren’t my friends” This seemed to break the green one’s heart much to the deluded one’s pleasure, “but I could use some help with them. I found them stuck on a cloud together and they have been acting, well really weird.”

“Well they seem to be friends.” Twilight said. “They look inseparable.” And truthfully they had spent the whole trip through town shoulder to shoulder.

“That’s cause I don’t trust this one not to tear something down.” The green one said.
“Besides, it makes this easier.” The other chimed in, kicking his friend in the leg.

“See what I mean?” Dash said. Twilight nodded and gestured everyone to come inside. She was already composing a letter to Celestia in her head; something told her these two where no ordinary ponies…

Comments

[Pop chatters]

OH GOD YES I CAN RELATE!
Inb4 featured. And this is just too much like me and my best friend. The description did claim that he was going to write the even numbers. How the hell did you get him to do that?
Only thing that isn't clear to me is who the plain freak is.

  “Oh absolutely,” Jake responded without missing a beat.  “otherwise I would have started destroying everything in a several mile wide radius, starting with you.”  

Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned the bestest of friendship can manifest in quite the violent forms...

[Cunt_Crusader]

Dislike entirely for the brony-in-Equestria.