Nevlamas
Joined 28th Dec, 2012 ·
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“Sorry?! Nopony is ever sorry! Only spit in the wind of glimmer!” He stomped at the rocky floor and stormed off. “Stabby stabby are the ones who should feel sorry! Sorry that Floydien is not goring them to a pulp! He swears to beloved!”
“Please…” Pilate craned his neck towards the stomping hooves. “Mr. Floydien--”
“Meat!” Floydien’s voice echoed back, wavering more and more with the distance the anguished sound carried. “Meat is all Floydien is! The meat of Deep Ridge! Allow Mr. Floydien to rot, you stupid, stupid boomers!"
A decent descent into madness for the Floyd. It also fits the way Skirts portrays Nightshade Industries. You got better as you wrote(the final third shows better writing than the beginning third).
4642990 Thank you! Funnily enough, I wrote the first part last. I've been struggling with the question whether to translate Floydien's dialect into his thoughts, too; obviously, I decided against it. It's an issue with the lack of information now and the even greater lack of information back then - it is extremely hard for me to tell how much of his strangeness results from his dialect and how much from his madness.
I remember.
4689800
10/10 It's ok.
5113428 IGN has spoken. It's kinda funny that you'd stumble over this the exact day it has just been utterly annihilated.
I'm pretty evil aren't I...
5391450 You try.
5393126 Oh shush you. We both got our flanks handed to us by a fuzzy blue Hummingbird.
5393873 Not strictly speaking. I was defeated by a radiant, violent explosion of all the remaining Harmonious forces in the world ignited into a single cataclysmic rekindling by the World Spark itself - you commited suicide. I will leave judging each of our scales of awesomeness to others.
5394655 ...Touche.
...well then.
I love the way the writing reflects his conflicting mental states.
I keep forgetting that you also have an unhealthy obsession with Florence.
This is a compelling little nugget of a story. I like the way it jumps around through time, making a tangled loop that brings us back to the Floydian and Simon (
!) that we know. I love your use of color, and the imagery of the forest as it relates to the inner workings of the mind. And the bit about the rain and sorrow and being cleansed...
<imagine slow clap .gif here>
6135820 There is no such thing as an unhealthy obsession with Florence and the Machine. No matter how much you get into it it's still so big, so blue, so beautiful.
But I also appreciate compliments from heathens! Thanks so much!
6136267 My fiance and I managed to see them live in New York a couple of years ago. Tears. Legit tears. Best live show I've ever seen.
Oh yeah... Whoop!
Welp... We live in a society