• Published 11th Dec 2013
  • 12,264 Views, 775 Comments

A Dream Come True? - Flint-Lock



The Mane 6 materialize in your bedroom...and they're not very happy to see you.

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What the...?

Click.

The comment flickers onto the screen, preserved in pixels for all to see.
You lean back in your leather computer chair and smile, savoring the moment. You hate to brag, but that was one of your best comments yet. Seriously, if you could, you would frame that comment and stick it over your mantle.

Well, that’s enough for now. You exit Chrome, shut down your computer, and stretch, joints and knuckles joining in a symphony of cracks and pops. In two hours, you’ve read and favorited two new stories, posted two threads on the forums, and left over fifty comments on almost as many stories.

It’s been quite the productive day.

The comments were especially fun to write. You like to think of yourself as a sort of fan fiction BS detector. If a story has an alicorn OC or an instant romance, you shred it to pieces with your razor-sharp wit.

You like that adjective--razor-sharp. It sounds so…manly.

You push yourself off your chair, smoothing out your “Brony” T-shirt. You pick your Wonderbolts hoodie off the floor; you’ve been lying around the house a lot. Better balance out all that down time with a vigorous walk…
Just as you’re about to head towards the door, you hear a strange hum. It’s as if a hundred Gregorian monks were practicing for a recital in your room. Odd. You look over your room, trying to find the source of the strange sound.

Maybe it’s the stereo. Damn thing’s been acting up lately. Maybe it’s finally broken for good.

You check your stereo; it’s off. Ok, so your stereo isn’t the source of the sound. Can’t be your computer either, because you literally just turned it off. So where the hell is it coming from? Before you can ponder the matter any further, a featureless glowing sphere appears over your bed with a faint pop. You take off your glasses, rub the lenses vigorously with your shirt, and put them back on.
What in the hell? You walk over to the sphere and, against all better judgement, slowly move your hand towards it. As you almost touch the suspended orb, you expect to feel intense heat radiating from its surface, but you can’t feel anything. You ever so carefully brush a finger against the glowing ball; it’s surprisingly cool, with a texture like that of slick ice. It reminds you of the first time you caught a firefly; you expected it to be hot, but it wasn’t.
Suddenly, the globes expands, going from baseball-sized to basketball sized. It keeps growing larger and larger until it’s almost the size of a man. It’s glow dims for a second, then…

POP!

You jump, knocking over a shelf of collectable My Little Pony figurines. The sphere just vanished. In its place are six, colorful little creatures, sprawled out, unconscious, on your bed like stuffed toys. Slowly, the gears in your head start to turn. You realize that you recognize those creatures.

They’re the Mane Six.

……

For a second, you just stand there, eyes bulging and jaw slack. They’re here. Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Twilight Sparkle. They’re all here, lying motionless on your bed.

That sounded so wrong.

“I’m dreaming,” you think. That’s right. This is all just a dream. You must have dozed off of the keyboard while you were reading a fanfic--you really need to start going to bed earlier. When you wake up, your face’ll look like you just slept on a waffle iron.

“Ok, time to wake up,” you say out loud. You pinch yourself. Nothing changes. There are still six candy-colored horses on your bed. You pinch yourself again. Still there. And again. And again. And again. Each pinch makes you less and less certain this is a dream.

After about 16 pinches, the point is finally driven home. The six pastel ponies on your bed are very, very real.
Every synapse in your brain fires at once as you try to process the event that transpired before your eyes. This…this shouldn’t be happening. These ponies aren’t real. Their bodies are outlines filled with color. Their voices are provided by voice actors. Hell, their very personalities were created by a team of writers and producers. Yet here they are. Laying motionless on your bed like a collection of extremely life-like plushies.
As your realization sinks in, your terror slowly turns to joy. This…this is every brony’s dream come true; the premise of countless bad fanfictions. Six of your idols, nay, your gods, have just materialized in your bedroom!

You take a closer look at the colorful ponies. They’re slowly beginning to stir. Quickly, you rush into your bathroom, comb the unruly nest that you call hair and shave off your Velcro-like beard so fast, you are slightly saddened to see a distinct lack of a rainbow-colored contrail behind you. For good measure, you squirt a little toothpaste on your scraggly toothbrush and scrub your teeth ‘til they shine.

What can you say? You want to make a good first impression.

Once you’re done making yourself semi-presentable, you run back to your bedroom. Your body feels like a balloon filled with joy. The Mane Six and you are going to have so much fun! Rainbow Dash will show off her flying prowess, pulling off tricks that would put the Blue Angels to shame. . Twilight and you will discuss your favorite books together, you and Applejack will go wrestling to see who’s the strongest. Rarity will take her time measuring and fitting you after her latest and greatest spark of inspiration… okay, that might not be fun, but it’s with ponies, so it’’ll be bearable. And to Fluttershy, dear sweet Fluttershy, you’ll confess your undying love.

You stand at the foot of your bed, gawking like an idiot at your… visitors. The six colorful ponies are slowly picking themselves up; looks like they’ve recovered from their journey to your bedroom. You hold out your hands and give them the biggest smile you’ve ever given to anyone.

“Welcome to Earth!” you say. You realize that probably wasn’t the best choice of things to say, but hey, quotable movie is quotable… even if the tone is completely different.
The ponies turn and stare at you. Your smile slowly wilts on your face. That expression on their face isn’t confusion or fear. It’s disgust.

-------

You’re more than a little confused.

One would expect the ponies to be confused, maybe a little scared by their trip. Instead, the six ponies are looking at you as if you were a convicted criminal. Even gentle Fluttershy, the Element of Kindness, has a stern look on her face. As if she was your mother and you had your hand in a cookie jar.

Your stomach begins to twist itself into square knot. Something isn’t right here.
“Uh, is something wrong?” Twilight glares daggers at you.

“Get him!”
At Twilight’s command, the six miniature horses leap onto your body, clinging to you like overzealous octopi and knocking you to the floor.

Applejack jumps onto your chest and slams a hoof into the side of your face. “GOOD FOR NOTHING VARMINT!” she hollers.

What..?

Rarity slaps the other side of your face with the back of her fore hoof. “UNCOUTH LOUT!” she yells.

You mind reels in both confusion and pain. What the hell is…?

“MEANIE MCMEANIE SANDWICH WITH A SIDE ORDER OF MEAN!” Pinkie shouts, following her swift hoof-strike.

You manage to shake the ponies off your body and make a mad dash for the door. A raspberry glow surrounds the door and slams it shut. You turn to see Twilight standing there, her horn blazing with the same purplish aura.
“You’re not going anywhere!” She turns to you. You feel a faint tingle rising up your body as she begins to cast a spell, presumably on you.

Thinking quickly, you dash over to your stereo and flick it on. You turn the volume knob as far as it will go, and a hundred and twenty decibels of dubstep tear through the room. The homicidal horses drop to the floor, holding their hooves over their spade-shaped ears. Twilight’s horn flickers off, and the raspberry light vanishes.

As your former idols-turned-attackers writhe in pain, you bolt out the wooden door and slam it shut, propping it shut with a conveniently located chair. You leap down the stairs three at a time, looking desperately for a place to hide.

SMASH!

You wince. That stereo wasn’t cheap.

WHAM!
WHAM!
WHAM!

You hear your bedroom door begin to splinter. Without thinking, you duck into a nearby closet and close the door as quietly as you can.

CRACK!

You flinch. That would be the sound of your bedroom door giving way to the hooves of a pissed-off 4’2 apple-farming cartoon horse. You have no idea how you’re going to explain that to your parents. You hear hooves clip-clopping their way down the stairs. Quickly, you cover yourself with a few old sleeping bags. The clopping stops.

“Dagnabbit, we almost had the varmint!” a disgruntled Applejack snorts.

“Yeah, we were like ‘we’ve got you now!’ and he was like ‘Oh no you don’t!’ and then he used that box to play those really nasty sounds.”

You are barely able to withhold your snickering; that sounded almost exactly like you. A detached part of your mind remarks that ponies apparently don’t’ like dubstep- there goes your head canon.

These trains of thought aren’t going to help you, so you quickly shove them to the back of your mind. You've got bigger things to worry about.

“Uh, girls?” a timid voice cuts through your thoughts.
“Yeah Fluttershy”

“Um, do we really have to be so, um, harsh?” Your heart practically melts. If you weren’t so afraid of having you skull bucked in, you would have climbed right out of that closet and squeezed that adorable yellow mare.

“Sorry Sugarcube, but we gotta stick to the plan.”

You scratch your head. Plan? What plan?

You hear a strangle warbling sound. That has to be Twilight using her magic.

“Anythin’ Twi?” The warble stops.

“He’s still here. I can’t pinpoint his location exactly but he’s still here.

“Guess we’ll have to do this the hard way…”

“Alright, girls, he can’t have gone far. AJ, Rainbow, check the outdoors! He might have snuck outside. “ Twilight immediately takes charge. You would be impressed if not for the fact that she’s setting up a man hunt, with you as the target.

“On it!”

“You got it, sugarcube!”

“Pinkie Pie, Rarity, search the downstairs. There are plenty of places he could hide there.”

“Oki-doki-loki!”

“With pleasure!” Pinkie Pie sounds cheerful as usual, but Rarity’s voice has taken on a near sinister tone. You assure yourself that noone will know much her voice scared you. If they did, you'd never hear the end of it.

“Good. Fluttershy and I will head upstairs and stand guard, just in case he tries to sneak back up. Lets move out!” With a symphony of clopping hooves, the ponies spread throughout the house.

Now what? You’re trapped in your home with six pissed-off ponies. Every exit is being watched, every floor is being searched thoroughly. There’s no way you can outrun them, and there’s no way in hell you can beat them in a fight.
Because you’re terminally stupid, you decided to hide in a closet instead of, you don’t know, running out the front door. Now, your only safe haven is a closet which is getting stuffier and stuffier by the minute.

You’ve definitely had better days.