• Member Since 7th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen Dec 20th, 2023

pvtread


Brony since 2011, and huge fan of FOE. Also founder of Suicide prevention group.

Comments ( 24 )

I like the premise so far, and the simple set up is a plus to me, though the dialogue is written like a script and needs some descriptors or actions to break it up a bit. I would also suggest that you find yourself a proof reader, as there are some simple mistakes in spelling and such that could be improved. (You could try looking in the Fallout Equestria group, or the Fallout Equestria Related Fics group, in which submitting this to would also be a good start to boost feedback!) This story has got potential, and with this, a good foundation. Keep putting out chapters because I'm interested in seeing where it goes! :pinkiehappy:

Well it looks good but it is way too fast

If the intent is to name him after the firearm component, it should be spelled "Firing Pin".

The reason this seems so short is because it is simply the prolog; also my proof reader is in a training command in the Navy and his off time is scarce what with working on his very own FOE fic. Don't worry the chapters will be long and have alot more substance to them; after all he did just kicked out into the wasteland didn't he lol.

The first actual chapter is up and I plan on it being close to 20,000 words, hope you all enjoy the story and feedback is ofcourse a pluss lol. O h and depending on what time I get off work and start typeing seeing as my work schedual varies from day to day, that will determine just how much I get done so bear with me ok lol.

So...uhm.....yea, does anyone on this site also type useing an xbox? If so...*ahem* WTF! why is it only letting me type 3,145 words and nomore! Is there a fricken xbox word limit? If so my chapters are going to have to be segmented; WHICH IS GOING TO F***ING SUCK.

3618993 I use my 360 and haventhad that problem

I,m "squeeing" so hard right now. just read the update. I did get a little confused but I figured it out. Hope to see more soon!!!!!

I like the premise... One nitpick though; it's spelled "prologue"

Well; my chapters aren't going to be anywhere near 20,000 words, unless the chapter calls for it. The average chapter will be about the length of an average chapter in the original FOE instead. I figure somewhere between 3 to 10 thousand words should suffice. That being said; there may be longer ones in the future, but I think averaging 3 to 10 thousand is reasonable to be honest.

I am absolutely loving this story, it is awesome keep it up.

This has nothing to do with the premise or story at all. It's just a song about an American boy falling in love with a Soviet Girl. Your Welcome! :duck:

Whats up dude. I'm creating a new group to help organize all the Fallout: Equestria side stories. Heres the link: Fallout: Equestria Side Quest Group

The story will soon be taking a very dark turn, be ready for it.

don't stop writing it bro... it's a good story. hate to see it be abandoned.

what a story pvtread, so far i'm loving it, and the comedy is comedy gold:twilightsmile:

So, uh, is this story dead?

Comment posted by Russian Bank Teller deleted Mar 11th, 2023
Comment posted by pvtread deleted Mar 11th, 2023
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