18: The Temptations
“Are you sure that you wish to go through with this?” Luna asked yet again. It was the tenth time in just as many minutes.
“Yes, mom.” I said letting out a tired sigh, running my hand over my head, “We both knew that it needed to be done eventually, may as well be right now.”
“But what if–”
“Luna,” I interrupted, placing my hands on her shoulders and staring her in the eyes. “Need I remind you that I’ve been to a war zone three times, lost my leg in said war zone, fought five guys at once and won and most recently, I beat a Minotaur with my bare hands.”
“You had assistance with the latter two examples,” Luna shot back quickly, pointing a finger to my chest. “I should–”
“And I think the former are a little bit more important in regards to this conversation,” I interrupted yet again, this time placing my finger on Luna’s lips. “What I’m trying to say is–”
“Why must you be so stubborn!” Luna blurted out, slapping my hand away from her face. “Always so willing to go head first into the most dangerous situations without so much as thinking! Why won’t you let me prote–”
“Luna,” I interrupted, lowering myself so I could be at eye level with her. “Please, trust me on this, okay?”
“I do trust you.” Luna replied, looking towards the bedroom door. “I don’t trust them and, given how they’ve treated you, you shouldn’t either. It’s smarter to stay with me.”
“I know you want to come along Luna, and I know that you’ve been trying hard to make up for something that was your fault,” I paused, placing my hand under her chin and making her look to me once again. “But there are some things in life you need to do alone, and for me this is one of them.”
I really hoped that what I said was believable enough for her, because in reality it was slightly different. I’d been cooped up in this castle for over a year, minus the one date night, and though Luna seemed perfectly content within the confines of the castle walls, I sure as hell wasn’t. When you know the exact number of glass shards are on each of the plate glass windows in the hallway to the throne room, you know you need a change of scenery, but if I was being honest with myself I knew that was only one third of it.
Luna had been especially clingy since I walked myself out of the infirmary a week ago, against the doctor’s wishes, and that was to prove to Luna that I wasn’t utterly helpless and was capable of taking care of myself. However, that seemed to backfire royally as every waking and resting moment has been spent with her hovering over me. The only place where I get a minor reprieve is in the restroom, and even then she sits outside and talks non stop. Granted I really can’t blame her after the whole incident at the gala, but Christ in heaven a man needs space.
That was the other reason I needed to be out and about, space, and not from Luna, but from Celestia. It wasn’t like she’d been flirting with me anymore than she normally does, Luna’s endless vigil made sure of it, but each time we did see one another, I could feel my blood running hot. I may not be very knowledgeable in the ways of the arcane, but there’s one thing I do know. Soul bonding makes you extremely attracted to the person you’re bound to, that knowledge driven home even more so by the fact that Luna and I’s room was locked for a week straight after she cast her voodoo.
“Very well,” Luna said reluctantly, seemingly satisfied with my reasoning and bringing me back from my all-too-often dives into my head. “Just be mindful, for it’s not just your life that rests on your shoulders.”
Luna stepped back and placed her hands on her stomach, it looked like any day now the babies would come, but for now, they seemed quite content inside their mother. With a smile on my face I reached out and placed my hands on hers, which was met by a small kick courtesy of one of my two offspring. I knew the two of them had been doing it for months, but each time I felt it I couldn’t help butterflies in my stomach. A father. Of all the far better men I’ve known, I was going to be a father. All the more reason to at least try to make this pony thing work, if not for me, for Luna and our children.
“Alright,” I said with a confident grin. “Let’s see if I can pull this off.”
Luna instinctively stepped back as I walked to the center of the room, making sure that nothing was going to fly around as I endeavoured to use the minimal amount of magic I had in me courtesy of the moon goddess. With few quick cracks of the knuckles and neck I took in a deep breath and concentrated. It had been over a year since I last did this, so I needed to do what I could to try and prep for it. Taking a quick glance over to Luna I shot her a smile and a thumbs up her direction, to which she responded with a concerned grin and a nod. That was my que to do what I intended.
I focused on my hands and clenched them tightly, concentrating intently on what I wanted to do. My eyes closed, teeth gritted and every muscle in my body flexed as I felt a surge of magic course through me. It felt weird, like feeling sandpaper and silk lightly brush across every inch of my body, I couldn’t help but wonder if this is what Luna and Celestia felt when they performed their transformation spells. Chance was that they did, but they’d done it so often they became numb to the sensation.
Before I knew it I found myself wrapped in a swirling ball of light, the time had come for the change. The feeling amplified as the magic began to course through me faster, rapidly changing my form from human to pony. I could feel my fingers and toes merging as well as my face elongating, fortunately for me however, I didn’t suffer the same fate as David Kessler, magic apparently lead to harmless body swaps.
Not ten seconds after the light enveloped me it dissipated, leaving me exactly where I stood once again, however the mirror I was once staring at was now a good three feet above my head, leading me to believe that my attempt worked.
“Well, how do I look?” I asked, turning to Luna, nearly stumbling over myself.
Luna tentatively stepped out from behind where she was hiding before letting out a quick sigh of relief. “Normal,” she smiled, walking towards me in a methodical fashion. “Tis rather amusing to see you be the one looking up for once.”
“Means I can’t stare at your chest while we talk without you noticing now.” I shot back, only to have a palm to the side of my head as a reply.
“Such is the way of men.” Luna replied, rolling her eyes, “I swear the lot of you think without using your brains sometimes.”
“Well we do have two heads.” I replied with a cheeky smile, realizing that my shirt was drooping over what was once broad human shoulders. “Well, I guess I should take a more natural approach to this.” I said taking in a breath as I shimmied out of my clothes, “There, all bet–OHMYGOD!”
“What?!” Luna shouted horrified, “What happened? Are you–”
“Where’s Neil?!” I exclaimed in shocked panic, running around in circles.
“Neil?” Luna asked, “who is–”
“The hell is he?!” I blurted out, not really paying attention to Luna in my current state. “Christ in heaven where’s–”
Before I could finish my statement I found myself surrounded in a sapphire aura, starring Luna directly in the eyes. I don’t know if she ever used magic when she did this kind of thing, but it sure as hell felt like it, because within moments I was brought from an overly panicked nonsensical moron to a far more mellow, and much easier to understand fellow.
“Are you better now?” Luna asked, her tone the very definition of unamused
“Uh… yeah,” I said with a nod, “I’m good now.”
“Wonderful,” Luna replied with a smile, “now what were you screaming about?”
The wires in my head reconnected at that point, nearly sending me into panic mode once again, but a soul stealing stare from Luna prevented me from panicking any further. With a deep breath I gathered my thoughts, thinking of the best way to explain my situation.
“Neil’s gone.” I finally said, letting out a deep sigh.
“And who’s that?” Luna asked.
“The reason you’re pregnant.” I said, pointing a foreleg, or whatever it was called on a horse, between my hind legs, “I don’t have him anymore…”
Luna’s pupils turned to pinpricks as the magic that once held me in place released me, allowing my face to become better acquainted with the floor. I looked back up to her slightly annoyed, but I couldn’t stay mad at her forever, especially since she looked so adorable when she was embarrassed.
“Why didn’t you tell me it was that?” she asked with a huff, trying to hide her pepper read face from me.
“I thought you already knew what I was talking about.” I replied, slowly rising back to my feet, or hooves… man, this is going to be a long day..
“Well when you give it a name it can be difficult to determine what you’re referring to.”
“If you say so babe.” I shrugged, “but that still–”
“Why Neil?” Luna suddenly asked.
“Excuse me?” I asked back, my brow cocked as far as it could be.
“Why did you name your… it, Neil?” Luna asked, pointing indirectly towards where my neither region should be.
“Oh, well that’s because Neil Armstrong was the first man on the moon back in my reality.”
Luna stood there, the wheels in her head going at full speed until it finally clicked, and once it did the look on her face was such a glorious mix of stern unamusement and unadulterated embarrassment I couldn’t help but to let out a few snorting chuckles. “You are insufferable…” she said completely stone faced.
“I know,” I replied with a stupid grin and a quick peck on her cheek, “that’s why you love me.”
Luna couldn’t keep her straight face for long, replacing it with a tiny grin before giving me a pat on the head. “It helps that you’re such an adorable little pony,” Luna said in a teasingly childish tone, her hand migrating to my jawline, “Such cute and pinch-worthy little cheeks~.”
And just like that, I hated being a pony.
“Alright,” I said attempting to crack my neck, only to fall face first to the floor. “T–Time to face the world…”
“Are you one hundred percent positive that you–”
“Yes.” I replied quickly, shooting back up to my feet in an effort to regain a small amount of dignity. “I’m a full grown man–”
“Stallion.” Luna corrected.
“… Stallion.” I repeated, the look on my face more than likely resembling closer to Sam Eagle than a pony. “And I can take care of myself.”
Before she could offer a response, I made a beeline towards the door and closed it behind myself. Insuring that any further requests to join me or sneering insults in regards to my hasty escape would be muffled. After a few forceful blows and garbled shouts spouting how much she despises me for once again taking advantage of the seal that Celestia had cast on our door months prior. After the final slam reverberated through the gold plated mahogany I couldn’t help but laugh to myself. Imagining how adorable she looked as she angrily beat at the door and roared words that I taught her was just too much to bare.
“She’ll get over it.” I said to myself with a chuckle, “if not, I’m sure I can think of something to make it up for her.”
With that I took a left and proceeded down the vast corridor, which was surprisingly empty, given the time of day. At least that meant I could walk around the castle while maintaining a shred of dignity before I stepped out of the castle. However, the hand of fate really seems to enjoy misery, because it decided that I should run headfirst into someone just as I made the first turn after our room.
“By Luna’s mane!” An unmistakable voice sneered, “Watch where you’re going! Furthermore, these are… oh wow.”
I stood there frozen, staring directly at Night Wing, hoping that he wouldn’t recognize me in my current form. As we stood their, eyes locked on one another’s I realized that he was almost, and I stress that word almost, as shocked as I was. That’s when I realized that even though my own size was nearly cut by a half, I was still nearly a head taller than him, the irony of the term my little pony hit me so hard I loosened up, even letting out a small chuckle, a chuckle that brought Night Wing back to reality.
“This is the private sector of the castle sir.” Night Wing half growled, trying to reaffirm some sort of intimidating aura, which he failed mind you, “If you don’t leave and return to your tour group I’ll have to escort you off the grounds, by force if necessary.”
“Yeah sure,” I smirked, letting out a small chuckle as Night Wing to a combative stance, “ya might wanna maintain your baring before making statements like that Night Wing.”
I tried to cover my mouth, but it was too late, Night Wing’s ears perked and his entire body flinched at the mention of his name and once again we were in the same position we were earlier, awkwardly staring into one another’s eyes, with me praying to the lord up above that he wouldn’t put two and two together, but this is me we’re talking about, so we all knew how this was going to go down.
“Do I… know you?”
“What? Nononono,” I nervously smiled as I waved one of my hooves passively, “I just, uh… saw your name tag!”
“I don’t wear a name tag.”
“Heard your name when you were talking to some other guards!”
“Only ponies in this hallway are you and me.”
My teeth gritted as sweat began to bead on my forehead. My eyes shifted erratically around the hallway, desperately trying to find something that would’ve given me a reasonable excuse to know his name other than my true identity, but there was nothing, nothing could’ve saved me from the inevitable outcome the unknown hand that has been writing my story my entire life was preparing, but you could bet to hell I was still going to try and fight it. It’s just what I do.
“I saw it on the roster at the front gate when I first walked in!” I said in a last ditch effort to spare myself the embarrassment of facing Night Wing in as how Luna put it ‘an adorable little pony’.
“Your voice.” Night Wing said, poking a hoof in my chest as his eyes narrowed, connecting the dots inside his mind, “It sounds, familiar.”
“W-what?” I stuttered, backing up a bit, “I have no idea what you’re talking about! There’re thousands of ponies! At least some of them are bound to–“
“AEDAN!” Luna’s voice thundered through the hallway, shaking the ground beneath us, “Thou shalt pay for thine insolence towards us!”
The fact the Luna was speaking in old English meant one of two things, and since she still had her clothes on it meant she was pissed. I froze solid; hoping the Dr. Grant method of avoiding extremely dangerous situations just might be my ticket out of my current predicament, but this is a world full of talking pastel miniature horses, not genetically cloned and created behemoth extinct reptiles from the Cretaceous. Within seconds I could feel her rage pulsing behind me, granted it could’ve been her breathing down my neck, but either situation right now was equally terrifying.
Taking in a deep breath I couldn’t help but let out a small whimper before turning to face the unbridled, pun intended, rage of a hormonally charged goddess who wasn’t even in a good mood to begin with. When I made eye contact all I saw was the rage and fury of every war humanity had ever engaged in all concentrated into a pair of cobalt blue eyes, her furrowed brow and toothed frown only adding to the sheer terror that stood before myself and my unfortunate counterpart. I could feel body parts that I previously thought had disappeared clench and shrink back into me as we stood there, I knew I had to say something, something that could defuse the whole situation and save me from a most terrible fate.
“H-hello sweetheart.” I stuttered, offering a weak, trembling smile.
“Thou dare not ‘sweetheart’ us, knave.” Luna hissed, pointing a finger charged with a mix of what looked like water and lightning, “we’d offered our assistance in the endeavor, you declined, but to slam a door in our face before we were done speak–“
“A-Aedan?” Night Wing said, poking my shoulder, prompting both Luna and I to stop staring at one another and focus on him. “By the heavens above… it is you Aedan!”
Before either Luna or myself could respond Night Wing keeled over, kicking his hooves in the air and laughing without control. Both Luna and I looked to one another, a cocked brow shared on both our faces showing that the past few seconds no longer mattered.
“Uh… you okay there buddy?” I asked, slowly inching towards him.
“Merciful Celestia!” Night Wing hollered as he continued to laugh, “of all the things you could’ve ever… a pony?! I’d thought you’d turn into a Griffon or a Dragon, even a Minotaur, but a cute lil’ pony?! Gods this is rich!”
“Hey!” I snapped as Luna let out a small chuckle herself, “why’s it so funny? You’re a pony too right? Why’s it so funny when–“
“Because I’ve always been like this.” He interrupted, seemingly finally finished with his laughing, though he still had a shit-eating grin plastered to his face. “You on the other hoof, have always been this big, hulking terror that the rest of the guard’s so scared by they’ve ordered that everyone stay in groups of at least three. To see you like this…” he paused, fighting the unrelenting force of yet another laughing spell, “to see you all cute and cuddly, it’s… it’s…”
Before he could finish he started laughing once again, only this time he wasn’t alone. Luna’s laughter echoed in the hallway right along with his, she even had to get on her knees to prevent herself from falling. All the while I stood there, the frown on my face growing more and more cartoony with each passing second.
“Tis true,” Luna said between breaths, wiping away a tear, “he always has had an overly masculine aura to him, but to see my strapping lover as such an adorable example of equine…”
“It’s the funniest thing I’ve ever seen!” Night Wing added focusing on me with a baby goo-goo face, “who’s a cutie pie? Who’s a lil’ cutie pie?”
Have I mentioned I hate being a pony?
“I’m tellin’ everyone in the guard!” Night Wing suddenly said, turning to face the way from whence he came, “they’ll lose their minds when they hear about this!”
“No wait!” I shouted, holding my hoof out, but it was too late, he was gone, leaving only myself and Luna staring at his ever shrinking silhouette.
“In light of recent events.” Luna said, breaking the silence, “I think it best not to deliver a punishment.”
“I think I’d rather face your wrath than the ridicule…” I said under my breath.
“Is that so?” Luna asked, sparks flying from her hand once more with a murderous grin appearing on her face. “I’ll be more than happy to execute my divine justice for your utter lack of respect.”
“Ridicule’s fine!” I said quickly throwing my forelegs in the air once more before being reminded that gravity had a nasty habit of punishing stupidity itself. “C-can I please just go now?” I asked with my face still flat on the floor.
“You have my blessing,” Luna said with a giggle, “just return before the moon’s over the castle, and do your best to not humiliate yourself~.”
“Already failed that…” I grumbled, rolling my eyes as I started off, giving Luna one last wave before I continued my journey to the gates.
The rest of my trip to the exit was rather uneventful, save for the guard trios that couldn’t stop laughing at me as I walked past. Night Wing’s a lot faster than I initially thought. In spite of the insults, jabs and highly unexpected catcalls, I made it to the gate with little incident, which lead to the next obstacle, the gate. I stood there a few seconds, like a kid staring down a bully after school, determined, stoic, ready to man up, ready to…
“Awww, look at the little guy~” A random guard shouted mockingly in my direction.
“I wanna pinch his wittle cheeks!” his partner added.
This is currently my life. I hope you’re happy God, probably sitting up there on a computer writing this shit as it happens aren’t you? You sadistic bastard.
“Yeah, make fun all you want,” I said, turning to face the pair of guards mocking me, “but remember…” I took in a deep breath and sprinted towards them, stopping just inches in front of their faces, smiles long gone, they gulped in unison as they tilted their heads upward to look me in the eye. “Even now I’m bigger than you.”
I let out a bit of a snort as I turned back to make my way outside, confidence somewhat restored by putting the guards back in their place. Now all that needed to be done was walk through that gate, which despite everything, was a lot tougher than it sounded.
“Alright, me.” I said taking in a deep breath, psyching myself up. “It’s like you’re going out there for first time again, nobody knows you’re a human when you look like this, just play it smooth and no one will even notice you.”
I didn’t see the guiding rail for the gate, because if I did I wouldn’t have landed face first in a puddle of mud after my first step. Hooray for first impressions, seriously that was straight out of every single awkward nerd becomes a man story ever, come on God, you can do better.
“Oh good heavens!” a voice of which I hadn’t heard since the Gala scoffed.
“Please no…” I whispered to myself, burying my face even further into the mud.
“Are you alright, my good stallion?” he continued, the sound of his hooves stopping right in front of my face. “Normally I wouldn’t talk to an earth pony like you, but since you’re exiting the castle unescorted you must hold a place of high distinction!”
“Touché, God…” I grumbled under my breath as I slowly rose to my feet, dammit, I mean hooves. “Yeah, I’m fine…” I snorted, flinging as much muck as I could off my body with a flick of my head. “As for distinction, I guess you could say I’m pretty close with the Princesses.”
“I knew you were a stallion of distinction!” He cheered to himself in distinction, “To have private audiences with the princesses is the highest of honors and that–Oh, forgive me, I failed to introduce myself, I am–”
“Lord Pompous…” I said begrudgingly, doing my best to resist the urge to shove my hoof into his face.
“Ah! I see my reputation proceeds me,” he said smugly, making it even harder to not knock his high and mighty ass to the ground, “please, you must come to lunch with me, I know that manager of the finest restaurant in all of Canterlot!”
My entire body jolted at the offer and unfortunately for me, Lord Pompous didn’t see that as an act of a hesitant man in a horse’s body.
“Splendid!” He said happily, using his magic to pull me closer, “You have got "
“I don’t think–”
“Oh and don’t forget about the tomato and cheese crackers, just superb!”
The next ten minutes was spent being drug along by a guy I would normally send to the dentist with a few missing teeth, getting an earful of all his fabulous exploits as a lord in Celestia’s court. Like meeting dignitaries from foreign lands, his family run business that was estimated at nearly fifty billion bits, making him the fourth richest pony in all of Equestria, behind Fancy Pants and of course the Royal Family. The unrelenting ego stroking would’ve usually made me lose my mind, but there was one thing that managed to keep me sane.
Out of the corner of my eyes I noticed quite a bit of mares double taking as we walked by, apparently Luna was right when she said I was a handsome stallion. I couldn’t help but laugh to myself a bit, seeing the irony in the fact that this was nearly the exact same thing the guys did when they saw Luna walk by back home.
“Oh my dear boy,” Pompous continued to talk, completely oblivious to the fact that I’d stopped listening to him about three blocks ago. “I know I’m humorous, but the joke wasn’t that spectacular, everyone knows that ape in the castle probably can’t wipe himself as it is.”
“What?” I asked, tensing up as those words were being processed in my head.
“We’re here!” Pompous said, still unaware of anyone but himself, pointing to the establishment he absolutely had to take me to.
My eyes followed his hoof to door of a rather elegant looking restaurant with a familiar looking host sitting at the front desk.
“Fuck it…” I mumbled as we walked to the entrance.
“Ah, my good friend, Garson. How’s today been?” Pompous asked, stopping right in front of the desk he sat at.
“Much better since you’ve arrived, Lord Pompous.” Garson replied with a smile, “Would you like your… oh my~.”
My attention was immediately drawn to the stallion that was now eyeing me like a starving Texan would a choice cut of steak. I swear that he was even salivating while he continued to stare.
“And who might this be?” He asked, letting his eyelids sink way lower than I’m comfortable with when another man’s staring at me. “Friend of yours?”
“Oh you dog, Garson, please try to contain yourself in front of Mister…” Pompous paused, inadvertently saving me from the fourth most awkward staring contest I’ve ever had in my life. “I’m sorry my good stallion, but you neglected to tell me your name.”
“Bullheaded.” I randomly blurted out, my mind still focused on the stallion that was eye humping me.
“Bullheaded?” Lord Pompous repeated, blinking his eyes a few times as he processed it. “A bit brutish don’t you think?”
“You have a problem with it?” I asked back. “Maybe I should have a word with the Princesses–”
“But it’s still a fine name!” Lord Pompous said quickly, nervously shaking his hoof at me.
I couldn’t help but smile at the display, if he only knew who I truly was, I wondered what his reaction would be. Though as tempting as it was to switch then and there, a part of me wanted to see how far I could take this, and how far he would dig his own grave.
“It’s fine.” I said smugly, prompting him to stop fussing, “nobody’s perfect, every one’s bound to make an ass of themselves every now and then.”
“An ass? Why you–” All it took was a confident grin and a cocked brow to shut him up, after a few seconds of gathering himself he finally extended his foreleg inside, “yes, yes of course. I have a table permanently reserved here, shall we?”
“We shall,” I replied with a grin, walking past him, half tempted to bump into him as I walked past, but unfortunately I chose to be the better man.
“Don’t be a stranger~.” Garson added as I walked inside, making me shudder in disgust.
“Please forgive Garson, my good sir.” Pompous said as he walked over to a table in the corner of the restaurant. “He can be quite forward, please have a seat.”
“Well, I suppose it’s one way know you’re good looking.” I admitted, accepting his offer and taking the seat with the wall behind it. “So what are we eating?”
“Whatever you want, my dear boy,” he said confidently, taking the seat across from me, “anyone in a close relationship with the royal family is a friend of mine.”
“Anyone?” I asked, cocking a brow and looking at the menu, “that include Luna’s consort? A… Adrian Riker or something?”
I looked over the top of my menu to see his reaction and it was exactly as I expected. His entire body tensed up at the mention of my name, letting out a heavy sigh he lowered his menu back on the, actually looking like someone I should take seriously for once.
“Anyone but him.” He answered with obvious disdain in his voice. “That… thing is nothing more than an uncultured dolt that the princess found loafing around in another dimension, if anything the princess took pity on the wretch and brought him along to bolster his self esteem.”
My eyes narrowed, but I managed to maintain my poker face. “Well, she clearly likes him, I mean, the news about her being pregnant and all.”
Pompous let out a laugh. “You honestly think that means anything to her? If anything she’s merely sowing wild oats, no doubt the novelty of that barbaric, sub-equine ape will run its course in no time.”
Gritting my teeth I put down my menu, just as the waiter walked to our table. Our drinks were ordered within the minute and Pompous decided to keep on talking.
“As I was saying, wild oats, nothing more,” he said, sipping on his glass for red wine. “The Princess has shown that she’s intent to give birth to that abomination. She’s likely to abandon it soon after and pursue a proper relationship with a proper stallion.”
“Put any thought into what that ‘sub-equine’ would say to that?” I asked, downing a shot of whiskey, the burning sensation traveling down my throat a perfect description for how I was currently feeling.
“I will tell you this right now, Bullheaded.” Pompous said, actually using my name. “I’ve spoken with that mouth-breathing git on two occasions, each time he’s been unable to defend himself or prove me wrong. I doubt he could even comprehend what I was saying!” Pompous paused to laugh at his joke, clearly amused at himself for being… clever, if that’s what he could call it. “I doubt he’d even know he was being abandoned. The–”
“Now, now.” I interrupted, raising a hoof, “I know that what you’re going to say next is important, but you said you met him twice?”
“Yes.” Pompous nodded, “and each time that dredge was incapable of engaging me on any reputable scale.”
“Really?” I asked, to which he responded with a nod. “Because the way I remember it you practically pissed yourself both times before you ran off with your tail tucked between your legs like a kicked puppy.”
Pompous’ face went from confident and egotistical to pure and utter shock. It almost made me wish I had a camera to take a picture, but the mental image would need to suffice for now. I smiled to myself as he further processed what I said and it even made me wonder if he was going to figure me out.
“H–how…?”
“Hey, Pompous,” I said, the confidence he once had now all mine. “May I ask you something?”
Pompous must’ve still been in shock, because he decided to answer. “Y-yes?”
“Do you like apples?”
“Uh… I suppose?”
Taking the queue I smiled, hopping out of my seat I made sure that nothing would get in my way. Seconds later I found myself surrounded in a ball of light, returning to a far more comfortable form. It didn’t take much longer before I stood there in all my glory, staring down to the absolutely shocked stallion below me.
“How do you like them apples?” I said with a cocky grin, crossing my arms across my chest.
Pompous didn’t answer, instead he decided to run out of the restaurant, tail between his legs, just like every other time. I couldn’t help but let out a laugh, but as the initial high of scarring that sorry excuse of a respectable being away I began to notice something. Everypony in the restaurant was staring at me, but none of them were focused on my face. Remembering one crucial detail about most of the inhabitants of this land I looked down to see the Mighty Neil Armstrong in his full glory once again, prompting my grin to quickly turn into an awkward frown as I grabbed the nearest table cloth.
“Uh…” I said looking to one of the still shell shocked waitresses after wrapping the cloth around my waist. “can I borrow this?”
“S-sure…” she stammered as I walked past her, “but you don’t have to bring it back.”
“Thanks.” I said said quickly walking past her and towards the exit. Hearing things those present whisper things like ‘by Celestia’s mane’ and ‘I can see why Luna wants him so badly now’.
With as much dignity as I could humanly muster, I marched my way back to the castle, keeping my eyes straight and set squarely on my goal. I didn’t care about the whispers, I didn’t care about the staring, I didn’t care about the cabbage stand being destroyed a second time in just as many times I’ve been outside of the castle. All that mattered was that I make it back with whatever pride I had left intact, and that looked like I was going to make it pretty unscaved. I got to the gate without incident, even the guards seemed to have decided I’d had enough punishment on the walk back and let me go past them without out so much a word.
Finally back on my home turf, I decided to take the quickest way back to Luna’s room as possible. Though there were a few instances in my life where I’d been in this predicament, I was never too keen staying like that for long, and I wasn’t going to start anytime soon. Ducking and diving through the halls I managed to avoid most of the butlers and maids, but those who actually did see me didn’t really seem to pay mind to it, apparently they’d seen me naked enough times to not be weirded out, which in turn weirded me out. I don’t recall ever walking around the halls without at least a pair of jeans and a shirt, but I didn’t have time for that, I needed to get back to our room.
A few minutes later, I found myself standing in front of Luna’s room. “Christ, it’s about time…” I said to myself as I took hold of the door handle. “Just need to get on some pants and–”
My thought was cut short by the scene before me. I expected there to be lights on, and Luna sitting on the bed or in the chair beside the door, looking as worried as ever, especially since I came back as a human in nothing more than a makeshift half-toga. Instead there was nothing but darkness, the only light coming from the slightly opened door I still had my hand on.
“Uh, Luna?” I called, hand still loosely on the door, “are you–”
“She’s busy running an errand.” a seductive voice explained from the shadows, just as the door I had my hand on slid from my grasp and closed shut. “I’m positive she’ll be gone for quite a while, besides, it’s not like she needs to be here for this.”
“What the–”
For the second time in less than a minute, I was interrupted, only this time the distinct snap of someone’s fingers, igniting dozens of candles and turning on the lights to a dim, romantic glow. The sudden return of my primary sense finally revealed just who I was talking to, though given the way she spoke, it wasn’t really much of a surprise.
Princess Celestia sat on the opposite side of the room, legs crossed and the tip of her index finger between her teeth. I’d seen her sit like that many times, normally when she was preparing to pull off a cocktease, but that wasn’t what got me, it was what she was wearing. A pure white corset pressed tightly to her body, her impressive bust practically begging to escape from their bonds. Topping that off was a matching pair of snow white evening gloves, thigh highs and a pair of glasses across her brow like a cherry on top. I was frozen, staring at the overwhelming sexual power that Celestia commanded, I probably looked like some thirteen year old staring at his dad’s playboy, because she couldn’t help but let out a confident laugh.
“I thought you’d like this.” she said as she stood up, making an effort to jutt her chest out as much as possible while doing so. “I put a lot of thought into designing it just for you~.”
I was unable to respond, instead my eyes just kept going up and down her body, drinking in every inch as much as I humanly could. It was then that I realized that the she’d mercifully chosen to wear panties, however they were completely lace minus a small bow and a small patch of cloth that covered her nether region. “Wha–why…?”
My attempt at talking was halted by Celestia making her first steps towards me, her hips rocking back and forth in a fashion that the word hypnotic wouldn’t do it justice. Finally, and for me, mercifully stopped walking towards me. Unfortunately however, she was within arm’s reach, which she took instant advantage of by lightly brushing her silk covered hand across my bare chest.
“I heard that you went out into the city as a pony.” She began tentatively biting her lip, looking at my chest as opposed to my face as she continued to rub back and forth. “I just want to say I’m proud of you, for swallowing that pride of yours and at least trying it out.”
“I… I did it for Luna.” I said, struggling to find my words, my mind was much more focused on the woman in front of me.
I shook my head and turned my eyes to an indistinct marking somewhere on the wall. “S-Speaking of which, I should really go and find her.”
I could feel Celestia’s devilish smirk crawling across her face. “Oh? What’s the rush? Surely you can wait with me till she returns.”
Instinctively, I started to step away from her to try and get some ground between us and make my escape before she trapped me. However, the sun goddess pursued me with a relentless hunger, closing the gap faster than I could retreat.
My knee started to buckle as it found the cushion of the armchair Luna used for reading. Taking no quarter, Celestia pounced at the advantage and knocked me back before pinning me down.
“T-that’s enough!” I blurted out, feeling more like a rabbit cornered by a wolf than a man under the weight of a princess.
“Oh hush, I’m just thanking you for being able to swallow that pride of yours~.”
The cogs of my brain began to slip apart as my eyes continuously darted between her and the now extremely interesting mark on the wall, “You already mentioned that.”
She smirked and stood up, “I know, but I am just so proud of you.”
I let out the breath I didn’t realize I was holding only to instantly regret my decision as her hands rested atop her remarkable chest.
“You did so well that you deserve a reward. There must be something I can give you,” she said, slowly tracing along her figure down between her thighs.
There was a small strand of drool escaping the corner of my mouth. I tried to wipe it away but I ended up missing entirely. Instead my hand acted as if it had a mind of its own, slowly making its way towards Celestia. Fortunately, Celestia decided to pin it it back down with a little bit of magic, unfortunately that gave the Goddess in front of me another burning idea.
Before I knew it, my other arm was held down on the armrest, effectively pinning me, as if I already weren’t in a good position to begin with.
“Now that I have your attention.” Celestia began in a tone way too sultry for a princess to have, “I think we should get started~.”
With a quick snap of her fingers a silken veil materialized in her hands and like that, she was off to my bed. It started out as innocently as a woman dressed in white-lace lingerie sitting on my bed in candlelight… Ok, It wasn’t innocent at all, but at least she wasn’t within arm’s reach.
Within seconds I was eating those words, because she soon slid off the bed and made her way towards me, all the while sliding the scarf across and around her body, each movement more sexual than the last. Until finally, she was standing before me, still pinned to the chair mind you, her eyes hungry and curious as to see how far she could go.
“I know you’ve been enjoying yourself so far, but now we can have some real fun.” She cooed, placing one hand on my chin while the other slid down the center of my chest and towards my abdomen.
As I was distracted by where her hand intended to go Celestia hopped onto my lap, letting out an excited squeal as she did so. I was now face to chest with what was possibly the breast pair of bests – best pair of breasts I’d ever seen in my life, and only the slightest movement would’ve found me buried in them. I tried my best not to move I tried to become stone, but when Celestia wrapped her arms around my head and pulled me in, my fate was sealed.
The Woman on top of me couldn’t help but let out a giggle, it was almost as if she could read my mind and was amused by what she saw. She even made my restraints weaker, allowing me to move my hands a bit. Attempting to use the opportunity to free myself I grabbed onto her hips, hoping I would be able to will myself to graciously throw her off of me, but the combination of her surprised moan and the silken softness that was her skin made my instincts decide otherwise.
I couldn’t help myself as I squeezed tightly and pulled her rump towards me, nearly undoing the one thing that kept myself covered. Her moaning didn’t help me at all as I managed to get myself free from her mammaries’ gravitational pull to look into her eyes.
Desire was the only thing I saw, a desire that led her to slide her hips back once more, resulting in me instinctively pulling them in again, only this time even closer. Our eyes remained locked as the cycle repeated itself a few times until finally the only thing separating us from crossing that line were the two ridiculously thin layers of cloth and silk between our loins. I could feel her breath on my face, I could hear her heart hammering in her chest, I could see exactly what she wanted.
And I froze.
“Celestia…” I said softly, grabbing a hold of her like an old prospector would a gold nugget. “I… I…” Before I could finish I wrapped my arm around her back and rose to my feet, placing her to the side of the chair. “I can’t… I really need to find Luna.”
I turned around and made a single step towards the door. Just a few more strides and I would be in the clear, but fate was never my friend. As I reached out for the doorknob, Celestia grabbed my wrist and spun me around to face her once more.
“Celestia…” I growled deeply, doing everything humanly possible to steel my resolve before having to look at the beautiful goddess again. “I told you–”
“A-Aedan,” Celestia stuttered, “I-I’m sorry, I just wanted to play another game. I didn’t want – I didn’t mean for… this,” she stopped, trying to cover her face and wiping at her eyes with a free hand.
Good job, asshole. You made her cry, I berated myself before moving back to her and brushing her hand away, taking her chin in mine to look her in the eyes before making an attempt at being a deep philosopher in the ways of the heart.
Again, God loves to make a fool of me, because what I saw next would seal my fate...
Her eyes were alight with something I had all too readily recognized; an uncontrollable lust burning like a wildfire and threatening to swallow us both whole. The longer I stared, the harder it became to think, to move, to breathe, but I couldn’t tear myself away from it. She was dangerously close to me and, while normally I would have stuck to my guns and kept myself from being overwhelmed, I found my hands moving to her hips as hers traced the muscles of my chest and arm before slowly making their way to my back. I could tell that she was trying to romantically tease me, but the pressure in her touch further confirmed how badly she wanted me to make a move.
My makeshift toga finally dropped as I lifted her right leg and placed my hand firmly on the mid of her back. She gave a small hop and we slowly lowered ourselves to the bed threatening to catch the sheets on fire as we moved. The electricity of her touch on my jaw snaked its way to my spine and down my body causing every hair on my body to stand on end.
She bit her lip as my hands made their way up her sides, gently tracing the underside of her breasts with my thumbs before finally reaching her hair. Much like with Luna’s it still flowed in an ethereal breeze but I could still grasps each little strand between my fingers. I gave it a small tug and I could feel her entire body tense around me as she threw her head back. Her moan dancing in my ears, tempting me to delve further and further into my lust.
Our lust.
The small voice in my head screaming at me to stop had long since silenced, now replaced by my instincts. She clawed my back, I bit her neck. I took her arms above her head, she wrapped her legs around my waist. We did this dance for quite some time before our eyes locked onto each other again, darting to the other’s lips back and forth. I couldn’t say who started moving in first, but I do know that our lips were only a hair’s-breadth away from pure bliss...
That was, until we both heard the sound of glass shattering. Celestia’s eyes went wide in shock as they locked on something just over my shoulder. I did not need to see her to know she was standing in the door but my head spun to try and deny my fears.
Sure enough, there stood the mother of my unborn children, one hand over her mouth to keep herself from screaming, the other bracing herself on the door to keep from completely collapsing. Her eyes were clouded with tears but I could still see her pain. It was like every bone in her body had been broken then forced to drink molten steel.
I tried to say something, anything to stop this nightmare from continuing, but my mouth could do nothing but hang wordlessly open. I was lost.
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This was so fun to work on. Grats on finally getting this turkey out of the oven.
To the readers: You're welcome for the chapter name.
That ending makes this not safe for woona.
Well shit... As much as I want to say it is all his fault, being trapped in a room with a lust filled goddess that magic is trying to bring you closer doesn't help. Still needs to work on his resolve.
Shite is now real. media.giphy.com/media/OYgcKl4X7fvyM/giphy.gif
wow this is not cool, poor luna
stayclassy
"TIA! I TOLD YOU TO WAIT FOR ME BEFORE YOU STARTED! HOW COULD YOU!?"
Won't happen, but I'd laugh if it did
I'm not sure how to comment magic filled lust, I have no idea. That's a whole new lvl of da fuck?
I have no sympathy for either one.
Hope Luna goes NM on both their asses.
I feel so sorry for Aeden even if he is being a moron, but I have no sympathy for Celestia. She knows what she is doing is completely wrong and to her own sister. Like she never learned her lesson to begin with -_-
This fits the situation pretty well
6483574 That group was awesome, love the music they did <3
I guess the same was happening to Celestia. She had never done the soulbonding before. Thus not knowing how strong the effects would be. They are both at fault, but who knows how strong those emotions were. Double sexy times incoming booyoyoyoyoyoys.
The Nightmare is coming bitches! Look the fuck out!
Why do I feel like its all the soul bonding thingies fault. Don't get me wrong, I've lost respect for Celestia as for Aedan... Yeah Luna can deal with him, but I kinda think the soul thingie might have been one force to push this over the egde.
The real question is why as soon as Aedan realized it wasn't Luna, fucker didn't turn around and run. Doesn't matter if all you have on is a table cloth, run!! Pants are pointless anyway!
That Neil Armstrong bit. Golden!
media.giphy.com/media/YPIrsRqqO7oB2/200w.gif
Still if you think about it's both Aedan and Celestias fault but at the same time not their fault. It's Celestias fault because she should know better. Seeing as how it was stuff like this (though not this exact situation) that caused Luna to go Nightmare Moon the first time around.
Not her fault because she has never used this bonding before,therefore she had no way of knowing what would happen. So she was unprepared for the lust that was brought on by being bound to Aedan and it clouded her usual level head.
Aedans fault because he also should have known better and had a chance to walk away. Not Aedans fault because unlike with Luna, whom he had a sexual relationship with before the soul bonding, he didn't feel this way for Celestia until the soul bonding.
So his actions were not entirely his own and more like the soul bond was forcing him to give in. Plus, despite what he may have done in the past, he is a nice guy that doesn't want to see people become sad.
I swear, I think Aedan going pony to appease Equestria would be a broken ending. If the ponies are xenophobes, and this chapter clearly indicates that it's not just anti humanity. then IT'S A MAJOR FUCKING PROBLEM. Aedan going pony would be the EASY way out and it wouldn't do shit to change the minds of a bigoted population (or at least the elite) that would go about their entire lives hating anything that isn't pony.
Imagine if the situation was with human ethnic groups after all. I wouldn't tell someone to "go ethnic group X" to appease the racist ethnic group Y. Cultural integration in any society is important, but one can't change who they were born as, and in this case Aedan shouldn't change just because the Pony elite is fucked up.
Good chapter.
Luna said in the previous chapter, in regards to Celestia:
Your wife, the mother of your children, and Goddess of the Night is EXTREMELY worried that her sister is going to try and steal you (her husband) from her. You open the door to your room and find said sister sitting there in lingerie? You do not let go of the door handle, do not pass go, do not collect $200. TURN AROUND AND LEAVE BEFORE ANYTHING HAS A CHANCE OF HAPPENING!
Aedan deserves whatever Luna decides to dish out for this... And he should just suck it up and take it like a man.
First, there was never any resolution for what had happened to "Neil." Was it gone? Was it just tucked away? We don't know because Luna switched to questioning its name before there was an answer, and then Aeden ran out on her.
Okay, so the situation seems to be this: Celestia bonded herself to Aeden to save both his andr Luna's life. We've seen no actual resolution to Luna's anger over this act, though I feel it's completely unwarranted because Luna's choices were Celestia's bond or death. She would be unreasonable to hold a grudge over that.
I'm going to assume that, because the events surrounding the bond aren't even mentioned here, that it's been resolved and nobody is (unreasonably) angry with Celestia anymore.
As for the end of the chapter, Luna should have been anticipating something like this. I can understand if she initially flies off the handle, but I don't think it should lead to as much drama as it seems to be ramping up toward. After all, she initimately knows how the bond works, and exactly what it does to participants. Given the way things are written, neither Celestia or Aeden have much control over themselves - probably due to the bond itself - and Luna would be wrong to hold that against them too much because she should know this.
Again, it comes down to sharing Aeden or death (apparently), and given how this chapter started it seems like she's already accepted that.
6485020
Our hearts can make unreasonable demands of us. Just because our mind has accepted something as fact does not mean our hearts will. Yes, Luna is aware of the effects due to being under them herself but her experience was due to her love for Aedan.
With that emotion multiplied to the nth degree, she would become somewhat obsessive over him where as before she was independent and able to let him do his own thing for the most part as demonstrated both in the prequel and earlier in this story. She has known of Celestia's teasing and knew in her mind that the bond would make this far worse that it already had been, but her heart refused to accept that something like this would happen.
When she walked in and confirmed her thoughts of what might happen, her heart refuses to believe it as so. That is her husband, the father of her unborn children, naked and on top of her sister whom she has known through all of her immortal life. While they may have their spats from time to time, they are still sisters and have been bonding closer to trust one another ever since she returned from the moon.
There is a lot of betrayal that her heart is feeling, but her mind has already accepted it. She will need time to process and time to talk with both of them for her heart to accept that it wasn't all in their control.
6485183
6484389
Wall of text. Break into paragraphs.
6485437
No. Cower before the wall.
6485437
There. Your brain shouldn't have as much of a struggle to read it now. At least the grammar was good and it wasn't full of run-on sentences. Just sayin.
6485694 Perfection.
Gosh dang it, Celestia. Your stupid games ruined everything.
Um... what the fuck did celestia expect. She's been trying to get into his pants for the past year - what did she expect when Luna finally figured it out. I'm seriously hoping Luna goes NMM on Celestia's fat ass, just to get back at her for being a cunt.
Whelp I might be done with this story.. Will see with next chapter ..
wow... that's bad news!
This is the first time in the story that I really don't see how this can still be written into a happy ending in a believable way. But who knows, I'm not an author myself, and I'd sure love to be proven wrong! And if I am, this story will be pretty amazing. I think the next chapter will either make or break this story.
Looking forward to it!
i hope that this fic also gets a sequel somehow and it doesnt have to be a happy ending you could make a ba ending and then a chapter with a good ende
Keep in mind that I have just read the chapter. I already read your blog before reading the chapter, so I knew that apparently something happened that resulted in you getting some backlash. Now that I read it, I can see what that is.(although I already expected this to happen before reading.) Hmm....It's not as bad,(I've read stories that went overboard) so it can be fixed.(Just not sure how.) While Celestia's teasing throughout the story has brought a lot of comedy and it made you wonder if she was really playing or not, to see this doesn't bring me any laughs. Spell or no spell, she went too far and hurt her sister for the last time. Now she is going to face the consequences that she apparently didn't learn the first time.
Queries: 1. Why didn't Aedan turn back into a pony so he wouldn't be walking back to the castle naked? 2. If I remember, can't the soul bonding spell be undone and if it can, then why didn't Celestia undue the bond once Aedan was healed?(Then this situation wouldn't have happened.)
I feel no sympathy for either of them. Magically induced lust or not, what separates sapient beings from animals is the ability to override desires and know what the fuck is right. The only way you can viably explain any of this is through magical mind control; explicitly mind control and not just lust enhancing.
He made her cry, feels bad for her and instead of apologizing and still leaving he essentially says 'fuck it' and then decides to fuck her! Honestly that moment right there ... I'm sorry but that is a weak plot hole to allow for tension to happen. I get it, got to spice it up and add drama, I do but in the attempt to stay away from the cliche of 'being caught in the midst of doing it' the resulting scene is weak and rather unrealistic from my view.
I'll be looking forward to what happens as I try to regain any sympathy or respect for Aedan, let alone this version of Celestia
Gah! So deviously evil! I love it. One question, though, who here now fears for this poor fellow's life? I do, because Luna just might slay a dragon with hisva Celestia's spines...
Cue
Unscathed
Aeden:"... Who's up for a three-way?"
:"Fine, be that way. We'll just continue without-"
Tia:"I am."
Luna:"I AM NOT!"
And that was the last sentence before Canterlot was crushed under the moon.
Ho;y mother of all that is good. This is just I Luna must be feeling all sorts of betrayal.
i really like Tia mature personality in the first story "princess and i" at the ending. I'm not liking this Celestia personality at all. It just frustrates me lol. I hope the story will not turn out in three way relationship for the ending. if it does...oh I just move on from reading the rest. Though I enjoy rereading the first story.
gg RIP the Diarchy of Equestria.
1. Those apples were damn funny.
2. Mary, Mother of God, you just threw a lit match into a room full of dynamite......HIT THE DECK!!
6603254 there are some people out ther who dont need much sleep there is even a man who hadnt slept in decades
6603254 oh and the record is now 3 weeks and 6 days
Well... I can't see this being anything but bad. But we'll see what happens in the next chapter. But I expect a lot of shit going down. I love both sisters but Tia really should have known her Boundaries.
Ha that's what happens. Nightmare moon will return again relationship shattered dun dun duuuuun. WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT
I liked the first story, it was cute. I hate this story because you've destroyed any interest I could have had in these characters by making me hate them.
Celestia's sexually abusive, uncaring for her sister, and might as well be a rapist.
Aedan's a weak-willed crunch nugget, whose first impulse is to punch anything he doesn't like and blame his victims for the consequences he suffers, who doesn't have the stones to stand up to the women who seem to constantly abuse him.
Luna's the only one with half an excuse because she's suffering the Nightmare and a complicated pregnancy, but I still hate her because she's too easily offended, she's irredeemably possessive of Aedan, and she's physically abusive.
I want all of these characters to die.
6952728
Harsh, oh well, can't please everyone.
I'll take note of your feedback and keep it in mind for future stories.
6952958 am i the only one that wants a sex scene between Eden and princess celestia?
Aedan's inner thoughts: "I wonder if the drop from the balcony is enough to put me into a coma."
This Will Not End Well
Why can I imagine a two litter bottle between his legs?
Cheaters are like Alcoholics.
You are never an ex-Alcoholic, only a recovering one.
Once a cheater, always a cheater.
Long ago I realized that sex, is like murder. Once you have done it once, it will Always be on the list of possibilities for everyone you meet.