Chapter 9
“Discord,” Sparkle murmured, her voice ragged, facing the petrified form of the creature that had once held all of Equestria in his sway. From within the statue oozed Discord’s spiritual form—insubstantial and invisible to all but his summoner. He floated there for a moment, considering her expression and tone with a thoughtful glance.
“Sparkle,” he answered after a moment, curling up against the statue’s base before her. His tone was calculating, thoughtful and slow, letting Sparkle take the lead.
“I am going to ask you a question,” she said. After a moment, she glanced up at him, her eyes tired and bloodshot and her face stained by the remains of tears. “And I would like you to answer it honestly.”
“We desire many things, Sparkle—some of them we even receive,” Discord said in reply, making a bored circling gesture in the air with his lion’s paw. “Ask, and we’ll see if you’re so fortunate.”
“Has Princess Celestia ever gone through what I’m going through now?” Sparkle raised her head to look Discord in the eye, his eagle’s claw reaching up to stroke his chin.
“Well now, isn’t that interesting?” he asked, rising from where he sat to pace around Sparkle. A snap of his fingers conjured a pipe to his lips, from which a stream of bubbles flew as he thought. “There’s a mystery here.”
“It’s a yes-or-no question.” Sparkle answered, tone flat and worn. “If you don’t know the answer—”
“Of course I know the answer, Sparkle,” Discord spoke, letting out a sharp snort. “But the answer, much like the question, is boring and straightforward. What’s interesting is trying to figure out what you’ll do once I tell you.” He removed the bubble pipe from his mouth as his pacing arc reached Sparkle’s front again, gesturing at her eyes with the mouthpiece. “Evening chat didn’t go well, I take it?”
“That’s none of your—”
“So if I say, ‘no...’” Discord bent down to lean in close to Sparkle. “If I tell you that Celestia has never been through what you’re going through now, you’ll, what, take that as proof that she doesn’t know what she’s talking about?” Discord’s tone was light and curious, but a chuckle soon followed his words, and with it came a sneer. “Maybe feel vindicated that she had no right to say all those mean things that made you cry? No. That part of the mystery is easily solved. What remains to wonder then, is what you’ll do—” Discord leaned back away from her, using his superior height to stare down at her from above “—if the answer is yes.”
“I’m not in the mood for these games, Discord,” Sparkle sighed, letting her rear slide to the ground.
“Moods are things for cattle and loveplay!” Discord replied sharply, Sparkle looking up faintly at the strange reply. “Get it?” He grinned, nudging her with an elbow, but Sparkle just tilted her head, and he sighed. “Of course you don’t—you ponies are so depressingly four-dimensional. The point is, this is your life, Sparkle. So tell me, what will you do if the answer is yes?”
“I don’t know,” she muttered. “I just... I needed to ask.”
“You shouldn't ask a question if you aren’t prepared to know the answer.” Discord let out a dark chuckle. “So I’ll make you a promise. When you know what you’ll do if the answer is yes, I’ll tell you if it is not. Cross my heart and hope to fly!” He extended a paw dramatically, turning up his head and crossing his heart with a long diagonal swipe.
“And how am I supposed to figure that out?” Sparkle asked, lowering her gaze, her ears folding back against her head.
Discord gave an impatient sigh, rolling his eyes as he reached a paw under Sparkle’s chin to tilt her head back up. “Talk through it, my dear,” he said, with a grumble. “The last time we spoke, you didn’t seem to be in nearly such a mood. What happened to leave you in this state?”
Sparkle drew a breath. “Well...”
“I said don’t look at me that way!” Twilight hissed, leaning in close to Sparkle. Twilight was glaring—but it wasn’t the sort of look where her eyes simply narrowed. It was an altogether different sort of glare, the sort where her eyes somehow got wider, straight and intense as her face seemed to narrow around them. Sparkle’s heart started to race. Her breath came fast as she scrambled away, the force of those eyes alone backing her up against the railing behind her.
Twilight drew in a sharp breath when she saw she had backed Sparkle up against the rail, the glare vanishing from her face.“I’m sorry!” she pleaded, but still, Sparkle could not look away from her eyes. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Oh Celestia, I didn’t mean to—” She reached out to help Sparkle, but Sparkle quickly scrambled away towards the door.
“It’s fine, really,” Sparkle answered, too quickly, her voice trembling as she moved for the door. She tried to make her actions seem casual, but her legs, her neck, her whole body felt tense and stiff as she made for the doorway. She fumbled with the handle, her motions growing increasingly quick, until the doorway finally came open and she rushed inside, pulling it shut behind her save for a crack. She turned back to look at Twilight, peering out at her twin. “Why don’t you go see about the others? They should be back soon.”
“Y-yeah.” Twilight weakly nodded, glancing up at Sparkle with a hesitant eye as her ears folded back and her tail drooped. “I’m so sorry, Sparkle. I didn’t mean—”
Sparkle shut the door. For a few long seconds, she held her breath. Her body held the door shut, and slowly, one trembling hoof reached down to fumble for the latch. Finally, when the door locked, she let out her held breath and slumped against the floor. Her forehooves shook under her, but she forced herself to take long, slow breaths. It was a few minutes before she could stand, but then she turned, trotting up the ramp that circled through the tower’s interior.
“Spike!” She called out. “Spiiike!” She raised her voice so that he could hear her even if he was in the tower’s upper reaches, but she found him not a full pace past the top of the stairs, sitting just to the left. “Spike!” She repeated itself, trotting up to him when he didn’t answer. “Spike, are you okay?”
“Um... yeah.” He sat up, turning to look at her, though his motions were oddly subdued. “Yeah, sorry. Just got distracted. I can go straighten up the library.” He rose, moving towards the shelves, Sparkle glancing between him and the front door she’d stood by just a moment ago.
“No, wait,” she said, stepping after Spike before he could get too far away, “let’s play a game.”
“A... game?” he asked uncertainly, stopping and turning back to glance at her.
“Sure!” she answered, forcing a casual cheer into her voice. “It’ll take all day to get this place back in order. We need something to do while we clean it all up—we’ll play make-believe.” Spike crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow, so Sparkle trotted up to the shelves, her horn glowing as she pulled the books off for sorting. “We’re back in Ponyville and it’s a normal—” she glanced for a calendar “—tuesday. What are we doing today, right now?”
“Uh, on a Tuesday?” Spike scratched his head as Sparkle started piling up the books in neat stacks to go through them one by one. “Well, right now, I guess we’d be doing the morning errands.”
“Okay! Like what?” Sparkle asked, her tone upbeat as she pushed the stacks around, sliding the shelf ladders to the side to get at the other waiting tomes. “What specifically might we be doing?”
“Um... we’d be going to Mrs. Cake’s to pick up those cupcakes you like?” Spike hazarded, his tone uncertain, but Sparkle rewarded him with a nod and a smile.
“Mmhmm. And today’s a special day, because she made one with gems, just for you. I’m not too sure though—treats like that are only for dragons who have done all their chores.” Sparkle finished with the shelf, levitating the book piles into a neat grid, to be sorted one at a time. “Have you done all your chores, this Tuesday morning?”
“Um... I guess?” Spike’s face and posture were stiff and uncertain, but he expression relaxed as Sparkle shoved the first stack of books his way, taking one to sort herself. “Oh... I get it. Well, I guess I do still have a few more chores to do.”
“Okay, so we trot home to the library, and I put the cupcake on top of the fridge for when you’re done,” Twilight said, looking at the first of the books in her pile and slotting it back in its appropriate place on the shelf. “And you’re doing your chores just like you should when... something interrupts you! What is it?”
“Oh, um... the Cutie Mark Crusaders!” Spike smiled a little as he too set into his pile of books, scrambling up a ladder to place one high on the shelf where it belonged.
“Okay. So you’re trying to do your chores when the Cutie Mark Crusaders come in, and they tell you that they need your biggest guides on explosives, butterfly taming, and the history of stitching—”
A loud, grinding sound interrupted Sparkle, and she looked up from her storytelling to see Discord slumped backwards over his own statue. His eyes were shut, a trail of drool running from the corner of his mouth, and above him floated a translucent log, a crosscut saw running through it every time he took a breath.
“Well I’m sorry if I’m boring you!” Sparkle snapped, glaring up at the spirit. He snapped to life with a shout, and when he shook his head, the log disappeared in a puff of smoke.
“Oh, hardly. This is fascinating,” Discord insisted, rolling his eyes. “I had no idea you found interactions with Spike so disturbing and unsettling. Or at least, I assume you do, since I asked you why you were upset.”
“Fine, whatever!” Sparkle snapped, scuffing a hoof on the ground as she glared up at Discord. “Princess Celestia and I had an argument, if you care so much. We—”
“No no.” Discord held up a paw for silence, momentarily shutting his eyes and giving a faint shake of his head. “Now I’m curious. Why did you chose that particular opener?”
“It’s the first thing we did today,” Sparkle shot back, her tone taking on a defensive set as her mouth twisted into a frown. Discord just smiled though, sliding from his perch to float around Sparkle and forcing her to turn to follow him.
“Hardly. Or am I to believe that not a thing leading up to that argument was the slightest bit relevant?” He glanced at Sparkle, meeting her gaze, and for a moment, they locked eyes in silence. She glared, he chuckled, and he floated back in front of her. “I have a theory as to why you started where you did,” he said airily, pressing a paw to his chest and raising his head high. “But I’ll be fair. Give you a chance to say it first.”
Sparkle mumbled something, her gaze flicking between Discord and the ground, her breath coming in uncertain starts. “What was that?” Discord asked, holding his paw up to the side of his head and cupping it as though to hear better. Sparkle mumbled something again, her gaze sinking to the earth, with only occasional glances at the spirit. “I don’t think I quite caught that?” He leaned in close, Sparkle’s gaze going to her front hooves, and staying there. “One more time.”
“It was just where I felt like starting,” Sparkle mumbled, her voice barely a whisper.
“Because it makes for the most gripping drama?” Discord asked, giving a low chuckle. With a snap of his claw, he summoned a bowl of popcorn and a glass of chocolate milk, stretching himself out in the air as if he were lying on the ground, his head propped up on his elbows. “So, go on. We were just getting to the point where the sweet and innocent Sparkle was protecting Spike from the depravations of that awful brute.”
“Shut up! This is all your fault!” Sparkle’s head shot up, a new glare in her eyes, sharper than its predecessor. “You’re the one who told me not to go see my parents, and then I didn’t and everything went wrong!”
“Oh, is that where things started going wrong?” Discord asked, with a faint wave of his paw. “The rest of your day was all hugs and harmony and brushable dolls, was it?”
“Yes, actually, it was!” Sparkle insisted, with a stomp of her hoof. “I spent time with Spike, I made up with Rainbow Dash, and everything was fine!”
“You and the featherbrain, mmm?” He raised his claw to his chin, tapping his teeth gently. “Well, go on then.”
“What? What do you care?” Sparkle demanded, but Discord only giggled, raising his palms to her.
“Just trying to understand your mindset. Please, tell!” he encouraged, his tone turning soft and his smile reassuring. Sparkle gave him a suspicious, narrow glance, pausing to think for several long seconds.
“Fine,” she finally answered, wary. “Twilight and Rainbow Dash came back later that afternoon with the others. Rainbow Dash... she tried to apologize.” Sparkle sighed and shook her head. “We didn’t really get a chance to talk until later that afternoon though—”
“Brown?” Rarity asked, raising a single eyebrow as she glanced up at Pinkie Pie. “Really?” She levitated the bottle of hair dye away from her, putting it back in the cabinet with the others. “I know the idea is to make Sparkle stand out, but let’s not beg for attention, shall we?” Sparkle sat between Rarity and Pinkie Pie, her expression flat and her attention focused entirely on her book. Her eyes scanned left and right as she read down the pages, ignoring the other two ponies and the instruments of beautification floating around her.
“I think she’d look good in brown!” Pinkie Pie insisted, sliding up next to Sparkle and fluffing her mane. “All edgy and punk!”
“That may be, Pinkie Pie, but somehow I can’t help but think that Sparkle’s interests might be better served by a nice, soothing electric blue,” Rarity said, levitating another bottle from the cabinet, letting it join the profusion of combs, brushes, and other tools floating around Sparkle’s head. “What do you think, dear?”
“Blue is fine,” Sparkle said without looking up from her book. “Just don’t make me look like Trixie.”
“Well, I hardly think you’re in any danger of that,” Rarity said, turning her nose up faintly at the very idea. “Now, Pinkie Pie, if you would be so kind as to—” A sharp gust of wind ruffled Sparkle’s hair, making the bottles of makeup on the cabinet rattle and clink together. Rarity turned an annoyed eye upwards, soon spotting the source of the disturbance. “Rainbow Dash!” she called, the pegasus one floor above them, doing loops and twirls in front of the massive main window. “Must you do that inside?”
“Uh, yeah. Court order, remember?” Rainbow Dash answered, executing a tight twist through the air as she spoke, rolling her barrel even as she rolled her eyes. “No fancy flying in Canterlot’s airspace.”
“I don’t think the justice meant that you should do it indoors, Rainbow Dash,” Rarity said, a grumble in her throat as Rainbow’s sharp turns and twists generated another gust of wind in the confined space.
“Well I’m not going to be grounded for nearly two months! What if I get out of shape?” Rainbow Dash insisted, shooting through the air to hover in front of Rarity and Pinkie Pie. Her sudden arrival and deceleration created yet another gust, this one washing sharply over Rarity.
“Oooh, can I pick your new shape? I vote for a hexagon!” Pinkie Pie volunteered before Rarity could say anything, though the growing grimace on her face spoke volumes on its own. Rarity lashed her tail, opening her mouth to give Rainbow Dash a piece of her mind, only to be interrupted before she could even begin.
“It’s fine, Rarity,” Sparkle said, shutting her book. “I wasn’t really that into the whole hair dye thing anyway.” Sparkle rose from where she sat, turning to the ramp leading up the building’s upper level. “I’m going to head upstairs. I could use some time alone.” Sparkle trotted away before they could answer, Rarity and Pinkie Pie exchanging uncertain looks in her wake.
Sparkle made her way upstairs, to the highest level of the library, and from there out to the roof. The sharp winds of Canterlot whipped around her as she stepped outside, but she showed little reaction. Her mane blew and lashed in the wind as she made her way to the roof’s center, settling down on the ground and opening her book again. A gale ruffled the pages, and she sighed, her horn coming alight as she projected a forcefield around the tome. There she stayed for several minutes, until she heard the door open behind her.
“Uh... hi,” Rainbow Dash said, poking her head outside. She floated out onto the roof, her wings gently beating. She nudged the door shut behind her with a hoof, drifting up to Sparkle. Her eyes were uncertain, flicking back and forth over Sparkle’s body and face, and she bit her lip gently. “So uh... that forcefield thing is cool. I guess it gets pretty windy out here.”
“Yes. You might want to land,” Sparkle advised, and Rainbow Dash set her hooves down to the rooftop.
“Yeah, probably a good idea,” Rainbow Dash said, reaching up to scratch the back of her head. “So um... you wanna hear about the cool loop I did?”
“Rainbow Dash...” Sparkle sighed, shutting her eyes. “I appreciate what you’re trying to do, really. But this isn’t helping. Please, leave me alone.” She gave a faint shake of her head, opening her eyes again to go back to her book. No answer came her way, and so she thought Rainbow Dash had gone, until she heard the flutter of wings and felt the pegasus settle down beside her.
“I said go away, Rainbow Dash,” Sparkle spoke curtly, her eyes boring into the page.
“Look, Sparkle. I know you probably aren’t happy to see me right now...” Rainbow Dash scraped at the floor with her forehooves, glancing at Sparkle. “But, you know. If things were different, I bet you’d want us to make up.”
“And what is that...” Sparkle started to ask. Her face tightened into a frown, her tail sharply lashing back and forth. “Oh. I get it.”
“It’s not like that!” Rainbow Dash was quick to insist, her voice rising as her tone turned defensive. But she pulled away as Sparkle sharply turned her head to glare right in Rainbow Dash’s eyes, leaning in so close their noses almost touched.
“Then what is it like!?” Sparkle demanded, her shout ringing in Rainbow Dash’s ears. “Because where I’m sitting, it looks an awful lot like you’re only ‘sorry’ because Twilight told you to be.”
“Well, I mean. Kind of.” Rainbow Dash answered, leaning her head back. “But not in a bad way!” she added quickly, a nervous, transparently false smile on her face that grew stiffer and stiffer the more Sparkle glared.
“Then what way, huh? Tell me!” Sparkle all but snarled, her face twisted into a grimace, so close that Rainbow Dash could feel Sparke’s breath on her face.
“Um...” Rainbow Dash stammered, gesturing in Sparkle’s general direction. “Could you stop, um. With the, ah. Crazy eyes?” Rainbow Dash laughed nervously, and Sparkle slowly drew away, her grimace returning to a soft frown as her gaze went down to her hooves. “Sorry. You’ve just got a really intense stare, you know?”
“Go away, Rainbow Dash,” Sparkle snapped, though her voice lacked the sudden anger of a moment ago, drawing its strength from a cooler fire. She just looked down at her hooves and then away, shutting her eyes. “I get it, you know? You like her, and she wants us to get along, so you’re here. It’s fine, you can just go and—”
“You know what the worst part is about all this?” Rainbow Dash said, raising her voice just slightly so she could clearly talk over Sparkle. “Every time I see the main entrance to the castle, it makes me think of the Grand Galloping Gala and that doughnut shop we went to after, but now you’re confined to the castle grounds.” Sparkle opened her eyes, though she did not look up, Rainbow Dash flapping her wings thoughtfully. “I mean, I guess I could pick some up after my community service and bring them here, but it’s not the same, you know?” Sparkle didn’t answer.
“I mean...” Rainbow Dash said, after only a brief pause. “It would probably taste the same. But these things are really circumstantial. Like, the Cakes’ cake that one time was amazing? But honestly, it wouldn't have been half as good if I didn’t have to steal it. It’s the same with the doughnuts. I remember them being delicious, but I bet if I got them now, they’d just be kind of okay. They need you guys and a table and us reminiscing about a bad day to be right.” Rainbow Dash glanced over at Sparkle, but still, Sparkle said nothing.
“I mean, bad days we’ve got.” Rainbow Dash admitted. “And you do have some tables, but it just doesn’t feel the same. I mean, maybe we could meet up in the theatre, since that’s on the grounds, and I really did like doing the Hearth’s Warming Eve pa—”
“I get it, Rainbow Dash,” Sparkle murmured. The anger had faded from her tone, and her shoulders slumped as she slowly lowered her head. “You don’t have to run through everything we’ve done together since we met.”
“Well hey, that’s what you did for me when you saved us from Dis—”
“Seriously, I get it,” Sparkle insisted, her voice rising for a moment, but that growing temper died before it could fully mature, and her shoulders slumped.
“Sorry.” Rainbow Dash chuckled awkwardly, tapping her forehooves together before her.
“It’s... okay. It’s fine.” Sparkle murmured, lowering her head down into her hooves. The wind picked up around them, chill and fast. Sparkle had long since stopped maintaining her forcefield, distracted by the conversation, and the pages of her book whipped forward in the gale until the book snapped itself shut. She didn’t react, staring out across Canterlot’s streets and towers. “It’s fine,” she repeated, barely whispering the words, shivering in the cold air. For what seemed to her a long time, she just lay there in wind, but then she heard a rustling, and something wrapped around her—Rainbow Dash’s wing.
“You don’t have to keep saying that,” Rainbow Dash murmured, pulling Sparkle in against her, her wing around the other pony’s shoulder. “I mean...” Rainbow Dash drew a breath, hesitating for a moment before she went on. “I get that you feel responsible for us since you’re kind of our leader, but that doesn’t mean it’s your job to make everything fine all the time. You can say that things are a little messed up right now.”
“No, Rainbow... that’s not what I mean,” Sparkle murmured, but Rainbow cut her off before she could say any more, giving her a tight squeeze around the shoulders.
“Yeah, it is,” she insisted. “I know you. You think everything has to be perfect all the time to the point that you drive yourself crazy. I mean, you’re fine? I’m not even the one who got copied and I’m not fine! C’mon. You’re like, my best friend, you’ve saved me more times than I can count, and I got my head so turned around I was calling you a toxic, spineless emotional parasite.”
“You never called me toxic or spineless,” Sparkle said.
“Oh, that’s good. Because I was totally thinking it,” Rainbow Dash said, with some measure of relief.
For a second, Sparkle didn’t know what to do, and then she just started laughing—a quiet chuckle. “Quit while you’re ahead, RD,” she said, shutting her eyes again as she laid her head against her hooves. Rainbow Dash opened her mouth to speak, but after a few moments, shut it without a word. She tucked her wing in against Sparkle to shield her against the wind and the cold, and Sparkle leaned against Rainbow Dash in turn. Sparkle could feel Rainbow Dash’s every breath as their sides pressed together, and when she raised an ear, she could hear the pegasus’s heart pounding inside her chest. Something about the sound made her laugh again, and she tucked her head in against Rainbow Dash’s chest. There they sat in silence for some time, until Rainbow Dash finally spoke.
“So, are we like, having a moment?” she asked uncertainly, and Sparkle smiled.
“Yes, we are having a moment.” Sparkle’s tone was peaceful, almost sleepy. “It’ll last longer if you don’t talk.”
“Oh. Sorry,” Rainbow Dash whispered, her body stiff and tone hesitant. That just made Sparkle smile more, and when Rainbow Dash awkwardly tried to lay her head down over the unicorn’s, Sparkle giggled outright.
“No no. Moment’s passed,” she said, slowly sitting up. “I do feel a lot better though. Thanks, RD.” Her gaze met Rainbow Dash’s, and they both smiled. After a moment though, Rainbow Dash’s smile flickered, and she averted her gaze, sending it back down to the stone floor.
“What’s wrong?” Sparkle asked, a hint of worry seeping into her tone as she leaned her head around to find Rainbow Dash’s gaze.
“Nothing. It’s fine,” Rainbow Dash answered reflexively, her words earning her a sharp jab in the side from Sparkle’s hoof. “Ow! What was that for?”
“What did you just tell me about saying everything was fine?” Sparkle demanded, and though there was no true anger in her words, her tone was firm and her voice elevated. Rainbow Dash looked at Sparkle and then back to the floor, but after a moment, she answered.
“It’s just... this is kind of a personal moment. Like, between the two of us. But I keep thinking about...” She tapped the floor with her hoof, her wings fluttering awkwardly. “It’s just, with our talk this morning...”
“We talked this morning?” Sparkle asked, confused.
Rainbow Dash didn’t answer at first, just scuffing at the floor with her hoof. “No.”
For a moment, Sparkle looked only more confused, but then it hit her, and her face fell. “Oh.” She turned away, shutting her eyes for a second. She drew a deep breath, her barrel tense, and let it out between clenched teeth. “Well that’s disappointing.”
“I’m sorry, Sparkle.” Rainbow Dash insisted, the pace of her words accelerating as her tone grew more worried. “I just thought—”
“Shh.” Sparkle reached out, touching a hoof to Rainbow Dash’s muzzle. “It’s okay. I’m not mad. I’d rather you tell me now than I find out later—the last thing we need right now is more drama. It’s just...” She sighed. “It’s just disappointing. I’d like to be alone now, Rainbow. I mean it this time.”
“Y-yeah. Sure.” Rainbow agreed, rising back to her hooves and folding her wing against her side. “Are we... cool, though? Like, really?”
“Yeah. We’re cool.” Sparkle answered, and after a moment, she reached out with both forehooves, pulling Rainbow Dash down into a hug. “Like really.”
Rainbow Dash gave a hesitant smile, turned, and trotted back inside.
“Mmmhmm.” Discord leaned back, reaching up to stroke the whispy white beard that hung below his chin. At some point during Sparkle’s explanation, he had conjured a pad and pen for himself, a set of wireframe glasses, and a truly luxurious-looking armchair in which he reclined. “And how long have you had these feelings for Rainbow Dash?”
“Well, since we met, really,” Sparkle said, and Discord scribbled furiously in his notebook.
“I see,” he murmured, with a particularly thoughtful stroke of his beard. “Do you ever find you have difficulty expressing these thoughts?”
“Sometimes, I guess. Particularly now,” Sparkle pursed her lips for a moment, letting out a breath. “And Rainbow Dash is uncomfortable with her softer side even at the best of times. It doesn’t really matter much, though. I mean, everypony knows. It’s kind of obvious.”
“So then you would say you’re comfortable with your present circumstances?” Discord asked, reaching up to adjust his glasses.
“Yeah. I mean, it feels weird to say, particularly given how much she drives me crazy, but Rainbow Dash really is my truest friend. She’s the Element of Loyalty for a reason, and...” Sparkle fell silent, surprised by the sudden crunching sound as Discord balled up his pen and pad, tossing them over his shoulder with an angry huff. “And, you don’t care about any of that.” She sighed, shaking her head.
“Just when it seemed this was going to get remotely interesting.” Discord rolled his eyes, and with a snap of his fingers dismissed glasses and chair alike, leaving him floating in midair. “But, fine, you made up with Rainbow Dash. Problem solved. We can all go home happy.”
“Not really, no,” Sparkle murmured. “I mean it’s better. I understand why my friends have problems... choosing between us. But, Twilight.” Sparkle tucked her forehooves in against each other, scraping at the ground. “She... said things to me today. On the rooftop.”
“Things, mmm? Well that does sound serious,” Discord answered, adding faint tsk to the end of his words. “Next, she might even say stuff, and then where would we be?”
“You don’t understand,” Sparkle insisted, turning to look up at the spirit above her. “These were horrible things. Things about us and magic and—”
“And fireballs and time travel and sunrises, oh my!” Discord clapped his forelimbs to either side of his face, assuming a mock expression of shock. He let it hang for a moment before he laughed, relaxing his pose as Sparkle looked up at him with narrow, uncertain eyes. “Please. I’m the spirit of all chaos and disharmony. Do you really think it’s news to me that power can make otherwise reasonable ponies go a bit loopy? I knew that about you the first time we met, and frankly, it’s not where I see your story going.” Discord leaned back in midair, stretching out and lying back, his paw behind his head. “So, you were getting to the part where it all went wrong.”
“No, wait, you can’t just say that.” Sparkle’s voice rose faintly, her tone insistent as she looked up at Discord’s hovering form. “What do you mean you knew that about me? Knew what? What do you see in my heart?” She rose to her hooves quickly, as though to physically intimidate the spirit before her—but Discord just chuckled, pinching two claws together and drawing them across his lips. “Tell me!” she snapped, but her words provoked no reaction from the creature in front of her, and after a few long moments of silence, Sparkle settled back to the ground with an angry snort.
“Where it all went wrong then,” Discord repeated, turning his head to look down at her.
Sparkle didn’t say anything for a moment, holding the spirit’s gaze, but finally she drew a breath to start. “It went wrong in a lot of places, Discord, starting with when I took your advice—”
“Well, I’m off,” Twilight said, stepping up to Sparkle. She looked much as she always did, but a keen observer would have detected the little changes: that her coat was a touch shiner, her mane smoother and better brushed, and just the faintest hint of purple brushed into her cheeks. It was Rarity’s work, and well done—seen yet invisible. Rarity wasn’t far away, and neither were the others, the Bearers of the Elements loosely scattered over the tower’s interior. Sparkle herself sat on one of the couches on the ground floor, a book propped against the cushions. She looked up at Twilight’s approach, and nodded to her.
“Say hello to mom and dad for me,” she answered, before turning back to her book. Twilight didn’t move, and for a time, silence hung in the air, until Sparkle finally looked back at her. “Yes?”
“You can still change your mind. I’m sure Rarity can clean you up in time for us to go,” Twilight said, matching Sparkle’s gaze. Around them, five ponies and at least one dragon suddenly found themselves distracted from what they’d been doing: Spike glanced down from upstairs, Rarity discreetly lowered her book, Rainbow Dash’s aerial acrobatics came to a sudden hover, Applejack looked up from her letter to home and Fluttershy from her sketch—even Pinkie Pie seemed marginally less pink. Again, silence blanketed the room, but this time it was Twilight who broke it. “I know you and I aren’t getting along, but this is important to mom and dad. I think it would mean a lot to them if their... real daughter showed up.” Sparkle still said nothing, but her tail sharply lashed to and fro. “I can stay behind, if my being there is the problem.”
“No,” Sparkle shook her head, turning back to the book. “You go ahead.”
“I know I did a lot to deserve that,” Twilight murmured, glancing at the floor for a moment, before her gaze tilted back up. “But, please. You’re punishing mom and dad for something that I did wrong.”
Sparkle’s tail went still, her ears folded back, and she didn’t say anything at all.
“Fine. I’ll be back later, everypony.” Twilight turned, trotting away, and then out the door. As she moved, the eyes of her friends followed her, until the outside door shut behind her. Then those eyes went back to Sparkle.
“Something I can help you all with?” Sparkle asked, and though she was looking at nopony in particular, her grumble carried wide and clear across the room. Nopony answered her at first, but a few of the ponies there exchanged glances with each other. Applejack and Rarity held each other's eyes for a particularly long moment, and when the moment was past, they both rose from what they were doing.
“We’re not judging you, Sparkle,” Rarity was quick to convey. “You know your own mental and emotional state, and if it is your decision that your recovery will be best served by not meeting with your family, then of course we support that decision.”
“‘S just that, well,” Applejack said. “The last two times y’all said that, ya seemed pretty upset. Lots of other things on your mind, you know. We’re just worried that yer makin’ this decision for the wrong reasons. You know, stuff yer gonna regret later.”
“Well, thank you for your concern everypony, but I’m fine. I know what I’m doing,” Sparkle said, trying to turn back to her book. The others didn’t go away however, Rainbow Dash lowering herself to the floor as Fluttershy stepped up towards Sparkle.
“We know you do. It’s just that, um—” she bit her lip, wings fluttering gently by her side “—well, it’s just that, you seemed really angry the last time you talked about this, and we just didn’t want you to—”
“To what, make a decision in anger?” Sparkle snapped, her voice rising as she turned to glare at Fluttershy. “Well I’m not saying it isn’t a legitimate worry, because I’m sure as hay angry now!” Fluttershy whimpered under the verbal assault, stepping away as she lowered her head, her ears folding back. At once, Sparkle’s expression softened, but the anger behind it was not so easily tempered, and she turned away from Fluttershy with a sharp sigh. “I’m sorry for snapping at you, but really, I’m fine.”
“Hey, Sparkle,” Rainbow Dash called out. Sparkle looked her way, but Rainbow Dash didn’t say anything, just giving her a pointed look from across the room. After a moment, Sparkle shook her head.
“Fine,” she said, taking a breath. “I mean... not fine. But why shouldn't I be mad? She made me sound like a complete witch in front of all of you!”
“Um. I don’t think she meant to. If that’s okay with you, I mean,” Fluttershy said, glancing up hesitantly. “I think she just really wanted you to go. It would mean a lot to your parents, and she must feel so uncomfortable going in your place.”
“Oh right. Because it would mean so much to them if their real daughter showed up.” Sparkle let out a snort, her tone bitter and sharp. “Mom and dad can’t tell us apart and she knows it. She just said that so she’d look better. I mean come on! She offered to stay behind, knowing there was no way I could say yes to that. She was just trying to puff up her stupid little ego by making herself look like the good guy, and by making me look like a huge jerk!”
“Sparkle! Now that’s not fair,” Rarity chided, her tone firm. “Certainly none of us feel you’re ‘the bad guy,’ and Twilight wasn’t trying to shame you in front of us. I mean really, think about it. You would never do something so manipulative and cold.”
“And what does that have to do with anything?” Sparkle’s hoof hit the floor hard as she rose from the couch, her voice climbing to a shout as she turned on Rarity. “Don’t you ever talk about her by saying what I would or wouldn’t do! I’m not like her. I’m nothing! Like! Her!” Sparkle emphasized each of her words with a slam of her hoof to the ground, leaning forward to glare at Rarity. “She’s manipulative and jealous and...” Sparkle trailed off as she saw Rarity’s expression, not angry, or defensive, but worried. Nervous. Unsure. Sparkle looked around the room sharply to the rest of her friends, and found them much the same—Fluttershy looking at the floor and whimpering, Pinkie Pie biting her lip and looking back and forth. Applejack was worst of all, her face slowly sinking as her expression grew flat. “Don’t you look at me that way,” Sparkle snapped, first at Rarity, then to the room. “I said don’t look at me that way!”
“Hey, hey,” Rainbow Dash said softly, fluttering up to Sparkle’s side. “It’s okay. We’re all on your side.” Sparkle’s expression shifted quickly, moving through anger, doubt, rejection and more, too quick for anything to stand out.
“I’m not her, Rainbow Dash!” Sparkle snapped, but Rainbow Dash didn’t rise to the barb. “I’m not,” Sparkle repeated, quieter the second time, her voice more subdued.
“I know you aren’t. We just all know you’re upset and... maybe this wasn’t the best way to try to help you,” Rainbow Dash said, nudging Sparkle’s shoulder with a wing. “Come on, lets go for a run, you and me. It’ll clear your head.”
“No, I—” Sparkle started to snap, raising her voice as she moved to shrug off Raninbow Dash. She paused halfway through the motion though, settling herself back to the floor. “No,” she repeated, with a calmer tone. “No, I want to be alone right now. Thanks though, Rainbow.” Sparkle turned away from the others, trotting towards the outside door. She stopped there for a time, turning to look back at her friends, and then up at Spike. The little dragon was still at the top of the stairs, his eyes wide and uncertain. When she looked at him, he forced a smile onto his face, giving her the faintest wave. She just sighed, lowered her head, and walked outside.
“Well, I have to admit, I was skeptical at first, but you were right. That was clearly entirely my fault,” Discord pressed a paw to his chest, letting out a heavy, over-dramatic sigh. “How could I have not realized the depths of my own malevolent machinations?” He all but wailed, only for his expression to abruptly change to a smirk. He rolled over in midair, looking down at Twilight with his head balanced on his paw, like he had his elbow up on a table. “I particularly liked the part where I tricked your friends into being all caring and supportive. That was particularly devious of me.”
“Shut up! That’s not how it happened!” Sparkle snapped, leaping back to her hooves, but Discord only yawned.
“Really, Sparkle?” he asked, arching an eyebrow. “I enjoy getting a rise out of you, but if you’re going to make it this easy, what’s the point?” He reached out to her, and with a sharp flick of his wrist, conjured a set of calipers into his claw. “I swear,” he said, reaching out with them to measure her head, “it’s like like you’re trying to take all the fun out of this.” He looked down at the tool in his hand, eyeing the measurement and wincing, a thoughtful murmur escaping him.
“I don’t have to take this from you,” Sparkle insisted, but she still provoked no reaction, the spirit simply dismissing the tool in his hand.
“That’s true!” he observed, with a thoughtful stroke of his chin. “You don’t. You’re free to dismiss me at any time, and to go back to the friends and family and teachers that love you so much.” He added the last words with a saccharine inflection, like one might use when speaking to an animal or a small foal, leaning down to pinch Sparkle’s cheeks. She sharply shook him off, and he chuckled. “So, will you?” Sparkle didn’t answer for a moment, but then she shook her head.
“No,” she murmured. “No, I’m... sorry, for my outburst.”
“Quite alright, my dear,” Discord assured her, opening his claws to the air in a conciliatory gesture, his palm facing upwards. “First, wipe those tear stains off your face.” Sparkle complied without thinking, reaching up to rub at her eyes. “Good.” Discord smiled. “Now, to return to the subject at hoof. I take it this is when you left to see your dear mentor?”
“Not right away,” Sparkle murmured.
“Where did you go first?” Discord asked, and there was curiosity in his tone, but there was something else as well. A hint of smugness, the sound of one recovering their high ground—like he already knew the answer.
“I didn’t go anywhere, I just...” She sighed. “I just went. I don’t know. I guess I thought that Rainbow was right, and that going for a walk would make me feel better, but I just started feeling worse. I kept wondering—if I combed my mane the other way, would they even be able to tell it was me? I actually thought about pretending to be her, so I could hear what they all say about me behind my back...” Sparkle drew a shaky breath, taking a moment to collect herself. “And then I realized how stupid and petty that was, and I just...”
“Aww,” Discord cooed, reaching down to put his paw over Sparkle’s shoulder. “There there. You can let it all out.”
“And I just felt so worthless I—”
“Sarcasm, Sparkle!” Discord flicked his paw under her chin, tilting her head up so sharply her teeth clicked together. “You were sad, we get it.” He removed his paw from under her chin, making two sharp little flicks with his fingers. “Move on.” She looked at him blankly for a moment, and he leaned in to emphasize his words. “You, Celestia, go.” He drew out the last word, fixing her with his eyes.
“I... I guess it was pretty late, by the time I went to her. I wasn’t in... I wasn’t in great shape—”
“One of the Twilights to see you, your highness!” the guard outside Celestia’s chambers called, raising his voice so that he could be heard through the thick wood. Sparkle looked up at him with wide, empty eyes, and said nothing as they waited.
“Enter.” Celestia’s voice called back, muffled by the door, and a moment later, the door slid open to permit Sparkle to pass. She stepped inside past the guard, and let the door swing shut behind her.
Celestia's quarters were dim, and Sparkle paused to let her eyes adjust. The purple rug and blue wall hangings gave the room a quiet demeanor at the best of times, each brushed with images of clouds or stars so faint one would almost think them a trick of the light. It was more than that though—the candles were out, and Celestia was lying in front of the fireplace, her legs folded under her and a book before her. Sparkle knew she had found the ruler of all Equestria in the middle of one of her rare moments of free time, and she almost backed away just for that, but Celestia gestured her onward with a wing.
“Come in, Twilight Sparkle.” She patted the spot next to her, scooting to one side to make room for Sparkle in front of the hearth. Sparkle made her way to Celestia’s side, and after a hesitant pause, settled down beside her. Celestia extended a wing over her, pulling her close, and Sparkle slumped against the Princess's side, burying her head in Celestia’s shoulder. Neither of them said a word for some time, though as they sat in the crackling fire’s light, Celestia did lean in over Sparkle’s head, murmuring soothing sounds.
“I will not think less of you if you need to cry,” Celestia whispered, and Sparkle whimpered into her coat at the words. “You’ve been through a lot. There’s no shame in that.”
“Why won’t you help me?” Sparkle asked, and though no tears flowed, her voice wavered uncertainty, fluctuating wildly in pitch. She pulled away from Celestia to look up at her mentor’s face, swallowing gently as she searched for the answer to her question.
“It wasn’t time,” Celestia murmured. “It wasn’t time for you to face this test, but the test is upon you, ready or not. I did not wish it to be so, but fate and chance have their way with all of us. Even me.”
“I’m not ready.” Sparkle’s voice quivered as she pleaded with her mentor. “I’m sorry, Princess, but I’ve failed. Whatever this is supposed to teach me, I’m not learning...” Her voice cracked on the last word, and she had to pause for breath before she could go on. “Make it stop.”
“I wish that I could,” Celestia murmured, brushing back Sparkle’s mane with a hoof and holding her head gently. “You don’t know how much it hurts me to see you this way, but there are some things you must face on your own. I could never have told you how to wield the Element of Magic, and if I had tried to guide you to it, it would never have come to you. All I could do was give you a nudge in the right direction and trust that you were the pony I thought you were. You did not disappoint me then, Twilight Sparkle, and I know you won’t now.”
“It’s not the same, Princess!” Sparkle shouted, pulling away. “I don’t care what this is supposed to teach me! Let me fail! I just want this to be over. I—”
Celestia pressed a hoof to Sparkle’s mouth, letting her fall silent. She gave a soft, sad smile, leaning down to nuzzle against the top of Sparkle’s head. “Shhh,” she cooed, and rose from where she sat, using one wing to guide Sparkle to the window. “Do you remember when you left Canterlot, and you told Spike that the fate of Equestria did not depend on you making friends?” she asked, nudging Sparkle to sit so they could stare out at the night sky together.
“Y-yes,” Sparkle managed, though her voice still wavered and threatened to crack. “I remember.”
“I know how much pain this causes you. I wish it didn’t have to be this way,” Celestia gave a heavy sigh. “In many ways, I wish you were a foal again, so I could just give you a hug and tell you it will all be better. But you aren't a foal, Twilight Sparkle, and now you must rise to the occasion. Do you understand?”
“Yes, Princess.” Sparkle drew a breath, stiffened her spine, and sat up—but her eyes still seemed heavy, drawn to the floor instead of the sky. “I understand.”
“When this is over, you and I will need to have a long talk, Twilight Sparkle. I owe you many explanations, just not now,” Princess Celestia glanced down at Sparkle, and the unicorn nodded.
“I understand, Princess.” She nodded again. “Is it a requirement of the test that I suffer?”
“No,” Princess Celestia assured, her words quick, her tone concerned. “No, do not ever think that I—”
“Then could I ask you for something, Princess? A kindness, while I must endure this?” Sparkle asked, and Princess Celestia opened her mouth to answer.
Then she shut it again. The reflexive answer, “Yes, anything,” died unspoken, something in Sparkle’s tone giving the Princess pause. After a moment, she gave a more measured reply, “You can ask, and I will grant your wish as best I can.”
“I just want to spend some time here tonight,” Sparkle said, looking up at the Princess. So close, she couldn't meet the Princess's eyes without craning her neck. Instead, her gaze found the Princess's chest, and her wings, and her radiant mane. “There’s things I’ve wanted to tell you for a long time, but the moment never seemed right. And now I feel like if I don’t say it now, the moment may never come at all. I just...” She swallowed, forcing herself to press on. “I have things I want to tell you—to ask you—that aren’t for her. They aren’t for anypony but you and me, and I can’t stand the idea that I’ll say them only for you to turn around and...” Sparkle’s voice cracked, and she had to pause to collect herself, drawing a deep breath as her throat tightened. “It would mean a lot if you could take some time to talk with me. Just me.”
Celestia paused, sighed, and lifted her wing off Sparkle’s back, folding it back into the resting position.
“You’ve always been like a mother to me—” Sparkle said, forcing the words out, but she didn’t get far.
“No, Twilight Sparkle,” Princess Celestia commanded, her tone growing firm, and regal. “I’m sorry, but I cannot do as you ask. It would be no kindness.”
Sparkle drew a silent, shaking breath, then another. “Of course you can’t.” The trembling in her chest that had been building through the conversation finally gave way, and tears started to flow from her eyes, her words broken by sobs.
“I’m so sorry, Twi—” Princess Celestia reached out for her student, only to have Sparkle sharply swat the hoof away.
“The hay you are!” Sparkle bellowed, but the anger in her tone did nothing to stop the tears, and even as she yelled, she struggled to find the breath to speak. “Words are cheap! If you were really sorry you wouldn't be doing this!”
“I’m sorry that things must be this—”
“Don’t give me that!” Sparkle screamed, her voice rising to a screech. “Don’t tell me you’re sorry this happened like it was something you had no control over! You could have pulled Twilight and me apart at any time, you could have told us anything you wanted, you could have warned us what kind of test this would be. You wanted things to happen this way! You made this happen this way!”
“I tried to point you in the right direction as best I could,” Celestia insisted. “It pains me to see you this way, but there are—”
“There are what!? There are little gremlins in the walls who won’t like it if we talk? There are evil spirits who are only repelled by misery? There are changeling spies and you don’t want them listening to our private talks!?” Sparkle demanded. “Because I’m struggling to think of another reason why you can’t even talk to me!”
“I know what you want to say, Twilight Sparkle.” Celestia spoke, her voice level, and calm, even as Sparkle’s rose. “There will be a time and place to—”
“I wanted to tell you I love you!” Sparkle screamed at the top of her lungs. In the wake of that declaration, neither of them spoke, and the only sound in the room was Sparkle’s sobbing, her chest heaving with every deep, fast breath.
“Such a profession is a deeply personal thing, Twilight Sparkle. You...” Celestia’s calm demenor never broke, but for a moment, it was she who seemed to struggle for words. “You mean more to me than you know,” Celestia finished, after a long silence. “And your feelings deserve better than to be used as a prize to lord over your own reflection.”
“I wasn’t—”
“You were,” Celestia spoke firmly. “It will be a wonderful day for me when you decide to say such things because you truly mean them. But that day is not today. Here, now, you said it because you wanted to own me in a way your mirror-image could not. Indulging that would be no kindness to you, Twilight Sparkle. No kindness at all.”
“You—” Sparkle stammered. “You think that I—” Her breaths came faster, quicker, her eyes narrowing. “I’ve been trying for years to find the courage to say that to you, and you think that I...” She squeezed her eyes shut, forcing the tears in them down her cheeks. “I’ve always trusted you knew what you were doing, but you don’t understand me at all, do you?”
“Twilight Sparkle—”
“Do you!?” Sparkle screamed, rearing up and sharply bucking, her hooves smashing against the wall hard enough to leave indentations in the wood. “You always act like you know so much—so wise and calm like the whole thing is under control! But this happened by accident. Luna is still trying to figure out how it’s even possible! Are you lying to her too? Are you keeping her as much in the dark as you’re keeping me? Or are you just full of it!?” Celestia started to speak, but Sparkle screamed over her without interruption. “Your story doesn’t add up, Princess! You swear you had no part in this, but you seem to know everything about it! You insist that it’s vitally important I do this on my own, but you can’t tell me why! You tell me it’s not about my suffering, but you can’t so much as lift a hoof to help me!”
“That’s not true!” Celestia snapped, “I—”
“To tartarus with you, Princess!” Sparkle cut her off with a sharp slash of her hoof. “I didn’t want to own you. I just wanted to have a special moment with my teacher and mentor!”
“And I didn’t want your feelings towards me to be forever tainted by your using them as a bargaining chip!” Celestia snapped back, her wings flaring outwards and upwards. “This isn’t how I pictured this moment between us going, Sparkle.”
“Oh that must be so difficult for you,” Sparkle sneered, even through her trembling breaths, her tears tumbling off her cheeks to the floor. “I can’t imagine how much that must hurt, forced to watch your student’s life fall apart. You poor thing,” Sparkle all but spit the words.
“That was beneath you, Twilight Sparkle!” Celestia shouted back, but after a moment, she drew a deep breath and forced her wings to snap back to her side. “This conversation is over,” she said, her tone sharp and commanding.
“Don’t call me that! I have a name, you understand? Sparkle. Just Sparkle!” Sparkle made no move to leave, staring down the Princess.
“Twilight Sparkle is your n—”
“Twilight is a liar and a killer! Don’t think you can lump me together with her, Princess! You can do what you like, but I will not answer to that name—do you hear me?” Sparkle demanded, and when the Princess did not answer right away, Sparkle screamed, “Do you hear me!?”
“Yes, Sparkle,” the Princess sighed. “I hear you.”
“Fine.” Sparkle drew a shuddering breath. “Fine!” She turned on a hoof, and stormed out of the room, the door slamming shut behind her so hard it rattled in its frame.
“Tragic.” Discord reached down to pick up his soda, taking a long draw off the straw until a distinctive sucking sound became audible at the bottom of the cup. That continued for a good several seconds before he put it away, letting out a contented sigh. The two then looked at each other for a time, in silence.
“Well?” Sparkle asked, quiet and hesitant.
“Well what?” Discord shrugged. “It’s quite the story, my dear, but it’s hardly news. Don’t you remember what I said the last time we met?” Discord snapped his fingers, hazy and translucent images of Sparkle and himself appearing where they had stood only a day ago.
“Rainbow Dash and Twilight are acting like it all never happened.” Sparkle spoke with a trembling voice, squeezing her eyes tightly shut. Her gaze was stuck fast on the ground, and she seemed unable to raise her head as Discord stood before her. “I don’t know how they can.”
“Ugh. Typical Celestia. If somepony lit you on fire, she’d watch and say it was a wonderful opportunity for you to learn to stop, drop, and roll.” Discord rolled his eyes.
Another snap of Discord’s fingers dismissed the apparitions, and he turned his gaze once again to the real Sparkle in front of him. “Celestia believes in learning by doing, Sparkle. It wasn’t my council that led you here—it was your failure your listen to it. I can hardly be blamed if you don’t pay attention.” He reached out to rap on the top of her head with a knuckle.
“So then, tell me already,” Sparkle murmured, folding her ears back as she braced for the news.
“Tell you... what?” Discord asked, giving her a wide-eyed glance—cluelessness exaggerated to farce.
“I told you what happened. Tell me if Celestia has been through all this!” Sparkle demanded, her ears shooting back up. Discord though only tsked, waggling a claw at her.
“That wasn’t the deal, Sparkle.” Discord let out the slightest of sighs, quick and patient, like a teacher correcting a slow student. “While I have enjoyed your little storytime, my terms were quite clear: I’ll tell you if Celestia knows what you’re going through or not once you tell me what you’ll do if the answer is ‘yes.’ You have yet to fulfill your half of the bargain.”
“Just keep doing what I’m doing, I guess,” Sparkle grumbled, but Discord narrowed his eyes at her, shaking his head.
“If that’s your answer, then mine is that Princess Celestia has never been a duplicated purple unicorn in your exact circumstances, so no, she hasn’t experienced what you’re going through,” Discord said, but when Sparkle opened her mouth to object, he cut her off with a snort. “If you’re not going to put any thought into it, Sparkle, you can hardly expect me to. I mean really, as if my thoughts weren't more precious than yours as it is.”
“Well what do you expect me to say?” she asked, her words quick and clipped. “That I’ll see the error of my ways and go give Twilight a hug and the power of friendship will just shoot out of us as a bright shiny rainbow!?” Sparkle realized what she’d said moments after it left her mouth, but by that point, Discord was already laughing so hard it was leaving him in stitches, the spirit wheezing just for breath.
“Oh, you—” Discord’s sentence was broken by another fit of laughter, the words garbled and incomprehensible, but one clearly stood out through the noise: “Priceless.”
“Shut up,” Sparkle shouted into the laughter. “Shut up!” Abruptly, she got her wish, Discord falling silent and whirling to face her.
“Alright then, Sparkle, you want to know what I’d like you to say?” Discord growled, so close his muzzle pressed against hers. “Something that indicates you’ll have the slightest capacity to deal with it when I tell you the answer is no.” Just as sharply, he pulled back, leaving Sparkle stunned in his wake. “I’m sorry, do you need me to repeat that? No, Celestia has not been through this, herself or by proxy. She is doing exactly the same thing all your friends are doing—trying to balance two ponies she cares about who seem inexplicably determined to hate each other. And like your friends, she is failing.”
“But I—”
“Don’t interrupt me! It is not Starswirl’s magic or Celestia’s tutelage that has created this problem, but your own defective mind.” With a snap of his fingers, Discord conjured a doll in the shape of Twilight Sparkle. Life-size, its exterior was made of cotton and felt, wrapped around a partially exposed interior of brass and clockwork. It had all the color and padding of a foal’s stuffed toy, but the bearing and demeanor of the walking dead, somehow standing despite all its joints being limp. A large turnkey stuck out of its back, which Discord gave a sharp twist, the thing starting to rattle and shake.
“I don’t even have any issues with Twilight!” The doll blurted out, in a flat, toneless imitation of Sparkle, mechanically raising its hoof, and then equally lifelessly stomping it against the ground. “I just wish she would disappear already so I could have my life back.”
“Remember that?” Discord asked. Sparkle stumbled away from the windup toy, her eyes going wide as her heart started to race. “Or how about this?”
“She’s just so ugly,” the doll said, its head sharply and unnaturally tilting to one side. “I don’t look like that, do I?”
“Stop it,” Sparkle demanded, her voice trembling. “Stop it!”
“Oh!” Discord grinned, “Or how about this?”
“I was wrong, Rainbow Dash. Things can be better again.” The doll sharply righted its head, blurting out the words in a mechanical drone. “We’re the Bearers of the Elements. We can overcome anything.”
“Remember her?” Discord chuckled. “I like that version of Twilight Sparkle a lot better than you. She’s got a good attitude. Would she be available to—?”
Sparkle drew a deep breath, leaping towards Discord. No matter how solid he seemed to her, she crashed through him without resistance, landing in front of the statue. There, she whirled in place, delivering three sharp kicks to the statue’s base.
Then, she was alone.
Slowly, Sparkle sunk to the grass of the statue garden’s lawn, and unseen by anypony, started to sob.
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We're back, baby!
Was hoping to release this along with the first chapter of the new fic I've been doing so much pre-writing for, but that has been going a bit slow. So, while that finishes up, enjoy!
Taking advice from discord, there is no way this is going to end well.
Good idea for story I like it
I did enjoy! Your portrayal of Discord continues to be rock-solid (
).
Also, “So, are we like, having a moment?" is so Rainbow Dash it hurts.
*reads*
....
1763392
Yes. Give me your tears.
I'd compare this to Background Pony but that story is in a league of it's own. Well done, might I add. Celestia was a bitch btw, which was quite normal under these set of circumstances.
It's about time she learns just how hypocritical she is. Maybe she'll stop being in denial about herself.
Or maybe she'll learn nothing at all and try even harder. Sometimes it seems that Twilight is handling the whole thing a lot better than Sparkle is!
Sparkle, you just got pwned.
Good job, Discord. Good job indeed.
Edit: Wow, never thought I'd say that...
1763455
Everypony loves the villian.
You write Discord extremely well. I have absolutely no idea if he's lying or not, and I'm honestly having trouble deciding if he's actually trying to help at all. It's wonderful!
1763542
Oh, of course he's trying to help. Help who is the more relevant question.
Well I don't see where Discord is wrong. He is actually trying to be helpful in his own way.
I want a happy ending with happy times.
1763598
Don't worry! We're [Sad], not [Dark]. In the end, Friendship prevails!
Unless it doesn't.
1763547
But The Doctor isn't involved in any way, shape or form... unless he is...
1763400
O_O um, wut?
1763850
Give me your tears!
I absolutely adore the way you write Discord, it is utterly fantastic. It's the exact same way I've always pictured him in my head, funny and crazy with an underlying layer of wisdom and a desire to help ponies in his own, eccentric special way.
1763920
That's ....not....... terrifying......
....at all.....
Yay, this again!
hmmm interesting. I can see Sparkle becoming little by little closer to what is usualy called a Knight in Sour Armor. Basicly she won't become evil but she will become less nice. It would be cool to see Sparkle notice her flaws and hipocrisy just to accept them totaly and become more of an Anti-Hero or Byronic Hero. Also I agree with Discord about Celestia, unfortunatly.
What.
The.
FUCK.
That is absolutely the most terrifying thing I've seen conjured up in a fanfic. I can't even- that the hell is-
What I'm trying to say is: You write a good story. Keep going.
This is getting better and better.
Also:
Discord quoting Patrick Stewart's character Gurney from Dune. That is awesome.
Oh my god you've got Discord down perfectly.
That last part...
It made me laugh a little bit and smile afterwards.
I'm starting to enjoy others' pain once again. Wat do?
1764106
I had a bet with my editor on how many readers would see Discord as trying to help in his own way, vs being a villain who is just toying with Sparkle's heart.
1764244
Thank you kindly sir!
1764181
Yes, I keep coming back. Like a loyal dog! Or pneumonia.
1764288
I couldn't resist.
1764334
You are bad and you should feel bad.
1764360
Don't apologize. Dune is one of the greatest sci-fi books and movies to be ever made, hell I even did a rewrite of the movie intro. I love how you popped the reference in so smoothly. Brilliant!
Woooo more of this! This is basically what I hoped we'd see from the Pinkie Pie mirror episode. Guess her confronting her personal demons was too edgy for children's television. Or Pinkie just doesn't have any personal demons. Except we all know THAT'S not true.
I liked this story at first. But now I really hate how Sparkle is acting and I don't find the way you've gotten her behavior to this point to be plausible characterization at all.
1764435
I'm sorry to hear that. This is really a story about Twilight Sparkle, taking a deep look at her internally. Since the show doesn't tell us all of that, I have to fill in the details as best I can, from my own inferences based on what we see. Naturally, not everyone will agree with my conclusions, and I know this sort of story isn't everyone's cup of tea at the best of times. Still, the story is moving to the point where things start to wrap up, those wounds are healed, and we remember that, hey, Friendship is Magic! I hope that you stick with it to the end, and if not, thanks for reading.
After reading this I got the strange thought of eventually Sparkle putting on the Alicorn amulet, killing Twilight and taking over Equestria in a fit of utter rage. All while Discord's jaw drops.
Unlike Twilight who does naturally seem to have some dark undertones, Sparkle naturally doesn't but can't shake the fact that her clone does. And rather than figuring out why Twilight seems slightly off, Sparkle drives herself insane.
After killing Twilight, sedating her former friends, turning the royal guard into babies, and locking Luna in the moon.
Evil Sparkle: Helloooo Princess Celestia.... twitch
Celestia: Twilight, the amulet is corrupting you, take it off! I can save you!
Evil Sparkle: Twilight is dead! It's just Sparkle now!
Celestia: What!
Evil Sparkle: Yes, Princess; I learned my lesson! I was taught that you are no more trustworthy than my so-called friends! I was taught not to trust anypony for they much rather be supportive of my bloody mirror image than me! I learned that even Luna, who I saved; decided to help that excuse of a pony who looked like me! And even you, even you, my mentor, my idol, my second mother; couldn't even let me be frank about how I felt! Now Princess I see clearly, it was not me who needed to be taught, but rather you! *Charges up her horn*
Celestia: Sparkle what are you doing!?! *As she also charges her horn*
Evil Sparkle: Teaching you a lesson! Now be gone! *A red beam of meets with Celestia's own yellow beam*
Celestia: Stop Sparkle! You are not in your right mind! Where's the filly I mentored so many years ago?
Evil Sparkle: She died with your lack of sympathy! Now you can join her! *As the red beam became larger encasing Celestia's beam and then flinging her out the window of the palace and down the mountain side.*
Celestia lands upon a small jutting out of rock battered and bloody but still alive. Sparkle teleports to the location with a red flash of light.
Evil Sparkle: Dear Princess Celestia, I am no longer in need of your services. Your superior student, Sparkle. *A red beam blasts Celestia off the cliff to which a sickening crack can be heard far below.*
HAHAHAHAHAHA
1764465
that's my big issue. That you're looking for issues, and I just can't see them, so for me you've got characters OOC. I'm not even sure what sort of issues you're trying to give to Twilight Sparkle and am actually wondering if this isn't just doubling but a GoodKirk/EvilKirk thing.
When I was reading this earlier I figured the big issue would be there's now two Twilight Sparkle's to fill one life. Either every moment in her life would have to be shared or one or the other would have to lose out on events. They are identical individuals, something that just doesn't exist
1764658
They say to write what you know, and for a long time, I had problems with self-loathing. A bit (more than a bit) of an inferiority complex, a crushing lack of self-esteem, etc, and while Twilight Sparkle is far from possessing *all* of those flaws, that is fundamentally what this story is about. The story you're describing would be fantastic, but it's not this story. IFIWT isn't "There's two of me, now what do I do?" it's "I have a clone... and I think I hate her."
As I said, not everyone's cup of tea, but I do hope you stick with it. The sun will come out in the end!
Yay this story isn't dead! :D
1764288
oO that's one hell of a meta connection and totally fits discord.
On that note - you really got discord down. Awesome :D
1763619
If this has a bad ending, I demand a tragedy tag instead of sad! HA! ^^ *opens that particular can of worms*
1764658
Well actually, Sparkle's reaction thus far have struck me as reasonable considering what is currently happening and the stress it's been putting on her. It's already been established that they are not exactly "identical" when it first came to light that Twilight saw things from a mirrored perspective and thus how they were able to tell each other apart. The main reason Ive seen at least for a lot of the conflicts that have arose in this story have actually fallen on her friends more then anything. Their actions have lead to the stress placed on both Twilight and Sparkle that have caused them to act in the way they do.
@GaPJaxie- I both love and hate how you've done this story, but in a more positive sense then you would think! You created a very interesting moral dilemma that leads the reader into looking in the wrong places for the right answers and I think that's very impressive writing on your part. But jeeez I just want to slap each of her friends and tell them how much they've been screwing the two of them up which I both hate the feeling of and love the fact it can create that feeling ^-^
Sometimes I wish authors didn't feel like writing long chapters after a long break. 10,000 word chapters are daunting, and require a bit of commitment get through. Not that I'm complaining. (Well, maybe a little bit.)
Well... I am a bit tired with Sparkle's behaviour... but so is Discord so I guess it's a part of the story and not bad writing. Seriously, he said what we were all thinking.
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"Oh look, Sparkle! It's a note from the readers. They told me to slap you."
I wonder if eventually Sparkle will just zap her back into the mirror; eventually her fear of causing death will be superceded by her wanting to have her life back.
Well, Sparkle's talk with the Princess didn't go nearly as well as Twilight's therapy session with Luna after all. .
“I didn’t want your feelings towards me to be forever tainted by your using them as a bargaining chip!” Yes, because allowing it to become tainted with rejection, pain and shame (because the accusation likely has some significant truth to it) instead is sure to not load the memory of that confession with remorse. Unless Sparkle's memories are not a part of whatever version of Twilight moves forward, then it doesn't really matter what Celestia wanted for that moment... there's only what it ended up being, and there's really no second first time for her to admit the depth of her feelings.
Although I might be being unfair to both of them... After all, Twilight and Celestia don't know that Discord advised Sparkle to not meet with her parents... as a result, they both end up assuming that Sparkle took advantage of Twilight being elsewhere to "claim" the relationship with Celestia for her own. While I still think there's some obvious truth in Sparkle desiring that, perhaps they'd see her motivations more kindly if they had a better grasp on the depth of her isolation. She did, after all, get assaulted and called all sorts of horrible things by one of her best friends for spending time with her brother. That friend is clearly emotionally attached to and spending the majority of her time helping her other cope. Her other is also getting personal help from Princess Luna in talking through all of what's going on.
Sparkle's got Discord alone, and really Discord should (by all canon evidence) be exactly what Sparkle accused Celestia of being... someone who believes that watching Twilight Sparkle suffer her way through all of this is the whole point of things. He likes torment. Sure, he seems to like to leave a chance for others to win his games and poke them towards doing so, but only, I think, because that makes it more interesting to him. (Then again, the show's Discord did celebrate when Twilight was finally broken and not offering any more resistance to him, so he certainly has no need to see the heroes overcome the challenges placed in front of them even if they do become boring as a result.)
Getting back to Dash for a moment, I'm not sure how I feel about how that talk went. It certainly wasn't particularly satisfying as a resolution to their problems, considering everything that has gone on between them. (If they truly are "fine", that is.) They really didn't talk out anything specific or deal with any issues directly. Sparkle basically had to laugh at how insensitive Dash was in talking to her and they had "a moment" as a result. Nothing close to an apology or a confession came out of either of them. (On a side note, I sometimes feel like the only one in fandom who doesn't see an especially close relationship between Dash and Twilight on the show. Hell, before "Read it and Weep" they hardly interacted at all aside from Dash mocking Twilight for being a nerd. As a result, while I have no problem seeing them as friends, I can never buy into "I've always had feelings for her" revelations in fics.)
I'm really not sure where things go from here. Sparkle clearly has to be full of self-loathing at this point, and unless she splits herself again I don't thinks she's going to be able to project it onto any other ponies this time.
Come to think of it, this spell could explain why Luna got so cheesed that every pony slept through her night. As a twin, the adoration she would have expected would instead be given to another. Drastic measures would then be taken to ensure she got the spotlight, even if that involved smothering the other light.
Twilight seems to be having real problems dealing with all this. She needs one big defragmentation nap.
Well, that's it, everyone. Sparkle's gone off the deep end.
I'll go get the straitjacket and tranquilizer.
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Would you believe that, when I wrote this, I thought that Sparkle was going to be the sympathetic twin?
1765419 I can certainly see how she'd see herself that way. But Twilight's been actively trying to patch up the two's relationship. Sparkle, meanwhile, seem to be harboring a grudge against her for just existing.
Well, shit. That was intense (particularly Celestia's scene).
Discord is most interesting sculpture.
I sympathize with sparkle more than twilight, though both are in an incredibly hard place to be. Wrenching chapter very well done, looking forward to the next
Wow. Lets see...
Withdrawal from friends... Check.
Withdrawal from family... Check.
Self loathing... Check.
Sense of hopelessness... Check.
Sense of lack of control over her life... Check.
Constant emotional pain... Check.
Sense of betrayal by ones she loves... Check.
...
I recognize this. It'll be a miracle if Sparkle doesn't go suicidal in the next chapter or two.
Gah, it's been so long since a new chapter of this has come out, I've forgotten how angsty it makes me feel
grr
Great chapter though, love the Discord you've portrayed